/lit/ - Literature

>>9876308
Hello Mary.

>>9401704
Do not believe a word this (im)poster says ... he's a fake

>Step 6

If you're able to convince the actual fashionista art dyke that you have that "special something" (i.e. you're willing to suck a lot of cock to get to her) she'll introduce you to their actual literati dyke friends (NOTE: again, they are not actually dykes. I mean, these dykes just play dykes when their husbands are not around, like, when they're out in public and they want to project that whole fake "feminist" woman power vibe or whatever to impress other women for God knows whatever reason. They still love sending late night texts to some guy named Gaston and getting fucking plowed - believe it or not, you may make this list. It's not hard).

>Step 7

Now here's where it gets a bit more difficult. You're going to look for the leader of the actual literati dykes. You'll know she's the leader because her husband is the most successful, see? This is the one you want to get to know. She's the one you have to convince you're "worthy." She's the one you need to make unable to resist sending a late night text to YOU and you need to fucking plow her. See, this one doesn't care that you're ugly as sin and probably haven't stuck your dick in anything better than the kinda maybe sorta no one is sure if she's mentally retarded or not girl who kissed your wee-wee back in senior year. This is the one you need to fucking give the business, too. This is the one who's actually (believe it or not) attracted to talent. Sure, her husband's money's great, but she didn't get with him originally because of the money. It really was his talent. Oh, and you better have a bit of material for her brain to swallow while she swallows your spunk. Again, it doesn't have to be any actual finished work. Just toss her little bits and pieces. And it's gotta be better than average (PRO-TIP: That's the hard part).

>Step 8

Somewhere around the time she starts getting bored with you and thinking about nursing some new /lit/ baby (around the 4-8 month mark, you're suddenly going to meet her husband. It will be a surprise. You won't know where. You won't know when. It will just be BOOM, you'll turn around and she'll be smiling and say, "Oh, anon, have you ever met my husband?" And you'll look like a deer in the headlights 'cause you have no clue what's happening. She'll say, "This is the young writer I was telling you about..." And he'll extend his hand to shake yours. This is it. This is the first impression. Don't. Fuck. It. Up. Because what you don't know is she actually HAS been talking you up for the last few months. This is your one shot. Your one opportunity. Mom's spaghetti. You're not going to get another one. Don't. Fuck. It. Up.

I wish Pynchon would come back and post here again like he did back in 2010.

That was the best of /lit/ times.

>>7848660

Yes and no.

I was kinda sorta joking and kinda sorta not joking. We know that the Greek Ulysses was Joyce's all time favorite character. In all of literature. He's said so.

Obviously the Odyssey is an influence but it's not the only influence. And, as far as I know, there are only two writers in the English language to go after Shakespeare's Crown, openly declare they were going after it/thought they deserved it, and have the stuff to back it up or, at least, someone could make a convincing that they come close.

One of them is the Irish Joyce. The other is the American Whitman.

They went about it in different ways, but they both went for it.