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/lit/ - Literature

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>> No.15091633 [View]
File: 235 KB, 817x1222, lorde-has-star-studded-dinner-with-gal-pals-01.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
15091633

When a friendly face emerges out of the crowds of indifferent people I feel an obligation to charm, to ingratiate beyond the means of my own personhood. We all have two options with our relationships: either tell the truth about our unexciting lives, or lollygag in an endless game of cat and mouse where life and career do not become an illusion but an elusion (I have coined many terms in my scholarly work).
Most will call this lying. I call it something else, an emotional tango, a dance of some kind. What can I say? It’s the only humanity left in my life. It’s all I know, so, what difference would it make if I laid bare my real identity when it is all a game? What would I tell them? That I come from a long line of con men and degenerate gamblers? That my intellectualism is just a disguise for the lace curtain yearnings of a working class kid? Is that what they want? Truly? Or should I say that despite my genetic good fortune I alternate between anxiety and depression, but that these names for things are nothing, wind, bullshit, all different masks worn by the same face. And if they ask how I know this you know what I’d say? I’ll say I know because I’ve tried it all: SSRI, Kale Shakes, Talk Therapy, Yoga, and various other vandalisms of the human spirit, because at the end of it all, there is nothing, no hope at self-improvement or upward mobility. None at all. I choose to lie, because I cannot talk to anyone in the real world.

>> No.12139010 [View]
File: 235 KB, 817x1222, lorde-has-star-studded-dinner-with-gal-pals-01.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
12139010

This is my first attempt at writing from a female perspective.
https://pastebin.com/6wtBdpiM

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