/lit/ - Literature

tl;dr I have been somewhat "outside" of the regular society the past couple of years and want to become a proper part of it again, yet on my own terms

>be me, highschoolfag
>kinda big ego but at the same time also depressed and kinda difficult character
>decide to enter the military cause they will pay for my studies and I don't wanna work a shitty student job
>do my basic training, cadet school etc.
>transition to (military) university
>do well academically but totally miss out on usual college experiences, first love, sleeping around, festivals, just trying out new activities that might be fun etc.
>ff. couple of years, depression gets worse also now I feel like I wasted my youth
>ff. yet again, military about to kick me out cause I wouldn't take the clotshot
>be in mid-twenties and have some money saved up and the good will to change myself, but lacking experience, haven't really interacted with normies in years and somewhat mentally unstable

Any fiction/non-fiction books that help you cope with that feel? Any similar stories?
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