/lit/ - Literature

>>11481839

>posting 6 paragraph review of a 1 paragraph post

nice man! you done good

>>11481927
not bad, but i'm not feeling the 'm' in Witchmhaven. Don't know if that was intentional or not. The beaches lead to the cliff, though? The picture isn't crystal clear in my head but it's not a bad warm up, as you've said. I don't know you if meant to include a comma between beaches and pebbles. If not, then you need to add an apostrophe at the end of beaches to make it possessive.

>>11481950
i use it to bump threads because it's one of the only original writing-relevant .png files on my laptop right now since I just had the HDD wiped. I'm not actually looking for feedback on it my man. I've never written a good poem in my life. I have no problem taking criticism

>>11481963
Thanks! Yes, emptiness is a central theme. I appreciate the read.

>>11482034
Which piece are you referring to? All of them are formatted differently, for the most part. Also, I've been writing for a couple years and still haven't found a standard manuscript format so I don't know what you're referring to

PLEASE CRIT MY V-DAY POEM

>>10615740
these are bad song lyrics, blink 182/10

>>10615717
the last two lines and the entire first stanza are pretty good, the rest kind of show your hand as being somewhat juvenile. Yours resembles mine in high school. Keep at your craft, but I suggest focusing less on rhyme and more so on your observational powers and executing enjambment properly

>>10615807
Not too bad, but overwritten. You need to go back to this and make many excisions. Maybe in your genre this is how things are typically written but to me this feels terribly out of style and dated

last crit thread died. you know what to do, /lit/.

>will crit for crit