/lit/ - Literature

Hey /lit/, would you mind critiquing a really awful poem for me? I mean, I know it's awful, I just don't know how to make it better.

inb4 "too awful for critique"

I really really would appreciate help on this.


"Religion should be illegal," he says.

It's things like this, like the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster,
That make me ashamed to call myself an atheist.

Because while I do not believe in God,
There are others that do.
Not only gun-toting, redneck, evangelical Christians,
But people that just need something to have faith in.

The single mother next door,
the Holocaust survivor in 2B,
the homeless man on the street,
and even the white, Christian, businessman sipping coffee at the local cafe.

The concept of a greater being, Christian, Jewish, Islamic, or otherwise
is the thing that keeps them going.
And who are you,
To deny them that?
There was also more that I wanted to say, but it was unbearable shitty, so I took it out. Bleh, everything sounds perfect until you write it down on paper.

Pic unrelated.