/lit/ - Literature

"I can tell by the look in your eyes that your butthole is hungry fer some lovin." said Jethro as he ripped George Cloony's tights off.

George had never felt this way before. His erection pushed against the wood encasing his entire body, with only his head poking out the side to scream like a mad coyote. A pair of Japanese twins poured molten cheese on his face, fresh from the microwave. The pain, the pleasure, the uncertainty. He would soon be dead, but a part of him didn't care. A part of him was hungry. His butthole.

"Just wait until I dig you out of that block boy."

Jethro undid his suspenders. Globs of fat splattered on the floor, his skin detaching itself from the weight of his body. Intestines poured onto the stage floor and the audience clapped until silenced by gunshot. Jethro put the deagle back in the trick bag.

"Mika, go get the dogs." he said.

The taller sister bowed and headed for the stage exit. This was her big day. Promotion, more money to feed her family. She must be steadfast! The Kyonsoto family was renowned for their professionalism. To fail now would be suicide, both professionally and physically.

George began to cry.

"You know... I can't... I can't even do this... I thought... I thought wrong..."

"Naw naw, no time fer whining now, you've committed yourself George. If you don't die the audience will be very disappointed.

Boom. The door at the back of the theater exploded and an elven head peaked through. Flames blazed from her eyes, and smoke leaked from the seams of her spandex uniform. She coughed. Dang it, so much dust in this allergy season.

"I'm here for the last one, motherfuckers." said Natalie. Not Natalie the caterer. Not Natalie that woman who works on the lights, I forget what they're called. Not Natalie next door to your house. Nobody important really, Natalie Portman.

I just finished watching Farinelli and although it seems a lot of classical musicians consider opera to be the "popcorn entertainment" of classical music, I still fucking like it so deal with it.

Opera/classical thread? Looking for suggestions, so far I like Cecilia Bartoli just because her voice was used in the movie.

>implying /mu/ is worth a shit