/lit/ - Literature

>it’s another episode of “procrastinate this huge assignment, worrying all day if you’ll even finish it.”
I hate school. If only I could get a job right now that made decent money and I could come home smelling like metal and dirt and feel tired enough to be relaxed and content but not so tired and beat down that I feel bad. But I’m not expected to do that, no. I have much more “potential.” All because I did well on tests in high school. I have to prove that someone like me can rise above his environment and make himself stand out. The only thing stopping me from going the comfy route is worry of regret, and shame from the people who’ve praised me all this time. Looking back, all that praise was great in the moment. I even miss it. But all of it means nothing now. I hardly even stand out in uni. For so long, I’ve been number one, and now I have to confront the real world, where I am nobody. I’ve already accepted that I won’t be anyone special, but I do believe if my childhood were different, I could have had more advantages and opportunities. So now I’m focused on my future son, but now the question is how hard do I need to push myself for his sake.