/lit/ - Literature

Post personal attacks on your person/character in literature.

For me? It's Oblomov

>walk in to used bookstore
>it's one of those hole-in-the-wall stores with books piled on the floor
>little to no organization
>it's manned by an oldish man with bifocals on the tip of his nose
>since the place is so unorganized the owner has a sign at checkout
>"Browse at your peril! Looking for something specific? Ask me, and I'll tell you if we have it and find it quicker than you."
>I'm looking for Oblomov
>initially I ignored the sign
>I had no luck finding the book at all
>the books were arranged idiosyncratically on the shelves and the stacks on the floor
>"Excuse me sir. I'm looking for Oblomov. I tried myself, but had no luck. Do you know if you have a copy and where it's located?"
>"Oblomov. Sure. Sure. Hold on a second. Follow me."
>I follow him through the store to what was once a lounge for perusing books
>chairs, divans, end tables, and coffee tables
>all stacked with books upon books
>he starts to remove the piles of books on a divan
>as he removes the books he says, "Got your Oblomov right here."
>he then lays down on the divan
>nestling his head in the corner where the cushion, armrest, and back of the divan meet
>he elevates his legs on the opposite arm rest
>crossed at the ankles, feet dangling idly
>he left arm hangs limply
>his fingers lightly brush the floor
>his right arm is elevated, crooked at the elbow
>the back of his hand shielding the light from his bleary eyes
>he holds this pose for about 10 seconds
>he fans out the fingers shielding his eyes, and peeks at me behind his finger blinds
>"Hahahahah, yes sir! Got your Oblomov right here! Hahahah!"
>I'm feeling extremely nonplussed
>"I'm not sure I quite understand. Do you have the book?"
>"Maybe you'll laugh in a few days. Hold on. Meet me back at the checkout counter."
>I head back
>after a minute he shows up with a copy of Oblomov