/lit/ - Literature

>>20362186
First of all, thank you for taking the time to write all this.

Believe it or not, my list of languages I wanted to learn was even bigger and I have been reducing it over the past few days trying to be more realistic.

I started Russian earlier this year and got absolutely filtered. The grammar didn't seem that bad compared to Latin, but the vocab like you said has been absolutely brutal. I cannot remember this shit for the life of me.

I am relieved to have someone tell me that my goal isn't stupid and that I can actually achieve it. Thank you sir. Now all I gotta do is get my shit together.

>>18341957
Thanks a lot, man

How does one kill all the voices from society that have been internalized? What literature deals with this?

Here's some elaboration if needed. There are only a few things I want to do and they make me feel bad when I do them not because I don't enjoy them but because of all the opinions and "wants" from others that they have drilled into my head, some systematically, others individually. All of these voices are actually not good for me, it's just other people wanting me to do what they want in the end, get me to think like them because that makes it easier for them. I feel like I have been trained like a dog to react to certain things not how I do, but how others want, being concious while it's getting drilled into you doesn't even make a difference if it's repeated often enough. Let's assume I have enough money not to work and I can do what I want all day, and I opt for playing video games because I like that. Obviously only to the degree I can naturally enjoy them without burnt-out dopamine receptors making me unhappy. Then the voices (not literally voices, I mean the drilling of other people's (or really the systems) opinion of how you should feel) makes me feel bad for """wasting your life""" when without them I would actually be enjoying my life right now, and what does that even mean """wasting""" life? You mean not doing what YOU want me to do. Supposedly what you want has some higher meaning out of nowhere? There is no higher entity dictating what it means, only power hungry with a god-complex, it's all just empty words for the purpose of manipulation and psychological warfare. Who can claim to be sincere? Only the dead.
>inb4 some faggot "intellectual" slave attacks my example situation instead of the actual issue at hand
>inb4 haha just don't give a fuck bro

>>17950686
I hope I can be like you one day anon. You can put yourself together again with a bit of work, if there is anything you like doing join a group of like minded people and maybe there is a qt 3.14 in there, just don't tell anyone about your fortune, especially not your gf. We are going to make it whatever that means to us currently.