/lit/ - Literature

>>21882786
My Jewess muse... your hooked nose, snagging my heart. Bazongas bounce, bodacious boobas. Was it 6,000,000? Maybe more.
My love for you is like a truck

Didn’t know that was a video

>>19979191
And I wish I could kick your nuts up through your throat

>>16796889
I’m giving primo advice (echoing a previous post as it turns out)

>>16796901
I hadn’t noticed. This reply is neutral really. She’s hot but a stuck up bourgeois

>>13619965
>he has a crush on a drawing
>pretends I’m jealous

>>12979550
Watch him fuck Tammy too

>>12952082
One scrotum nut minus two paisley hairs selected from specific panties

>>11807199
his sister's diary

>>10544853
This. You know nothing about the subject and obviously have nothing to say, so just go for the lowest common denominator and shoot for the big bux.

Just write about some merchant's daughter (so not really poor, but not really rich either) who's a free spirit and who's parents just don't understand (ugh) so she sneaks down to the tavern by the docks to live vicariously. Her father finds out, there's a big blowout fight and she runs away, disguising herself as a boy and signing on to the next ship heading out of port. Bonus points if she met an older (But only like 20 at the MAX) boy at the tavern earlier who's smolderingly attractive, brooding and aloof (Guess who's on the ship?)

She's obviously a natural at everything on the boat, from sailing to swashbuckling, and you can even throw in some awkward, teenage comedy about her pretending to be a dude. Extra bonus points if you throw in some slightly homoerotic flirting with aforementioned brooding hunk.

Then some big boarding action happens, she gets wounded (while doing something totally badass and heroic, like taking a pistol shot for the captain) and she's discovered as a woman, but by this point she's such an integral part of the crew that all is forgiven and she's accepted (take that misogyny!). Cue actual romance between our heroine and the hunk, but it's tainted since he feels betrayed and confused. (Save the actual romance for the inevitable sequel, of course.)

Extra, extra bonus points if you throw in some vague Voodoo magic and make her the key to it. Some sort of prophecy or something, I'm not writing your entire book for you here. Have the book end with her having some sort of wicked cool spirit powers that is hinted at throughout the book, and her somehow saving the entire crew from certain doom.

Bam. There you go.