/lit/ - Literature

>>11757777

>Thomas Pynchon Presents: The REAL Unaboomer Manifesto

Hi, Thomas Pynchon here, also known as The Guy who wrote at least 3 really long books that aren’t worth reading. When I’m not walking around New York City with my shithead great grand nephew buying him the latest V-Box or whatever (back in my day, we had to wait four weeks for Trystero to deliver a Captain Racism doll and we’d have to use nothing but our imagination to have fun with it (That and of course the three variations of the n-word that would play when you squeezed his amputated legs (By the n-word I meant Nigger))).
Anyway, like you said, when I’m not wasting my fortune from my very successful writing career on my ungrateful family or smoking a Big Fat Joint in my bachelor pad, you like to reminisce on when I, Thomas Pynchon, became an anarcho primitivist for a week. It all started when you ran into this guy, Teddy Something, at the University of Michigan in the late 60s. you was trying to score some acid off of some of the cooler kids, when you quite literally ran into this Ted cat.
“My papers!”
“Let me help you with that”, you offered, noticing the complex equations and symbols scrawled across the sheets, “I really am sorry. you was looking for some cool kids to buy drugs off, but it's clear you are a math nerd and therefore not useful to me. Although, you am really trying to get some mathy stuff into my next novel, that would really have the critics going bananas...”
“I don’t have time for this. Please just hand me those papers.”
“Now hold on, what's this? These aren’t standard nerd equations.”
With my background as an engineer at the yoyo factory, you was able to tell that Teddy here was planning on building a bomb.
“You know, if you write me a couple of math jokes for my novel, I’m willing to forget everything you just saw here.”
“*sigh* How about send you them in the mail when you have some more time.”
“It’s a deal!”, you outstretched my hand and BZZT zapped him with a classic buzzer hidden in my palm. “Haha, got ya. This baby is the most powerful buzzer you can get!”
He walked grumpily away.
“What’s the matter, you don’t like new technology?” I shouted.

I wonder if Pinch-daddy knows how much his boys here on /lit/ love him. I wonder if he cares...

Thomas Pynchon power rankings itt:

I'll start

1. Mason & Dixon
2. V.
3. Gravity's Rainbow
4. Against the Day
5. TCoL49
6. Inherent Vice
7. Bleeding Edge
8. Vineland