/lit/ - Literature

>>19953266
It feels really weird thinking I spent so many years alienated and sulking and how there is now a real future in front of me. I didn't even try to talk to women until I was 28 and now I realize it's incredibly easy. After losing 60 bs there was a handsome face hidden inside my body but there's no such discovery for the rest of me, for my mind or soul or whatever. For all the anticipation sex isn't that much better than masturbation. I have no idea what I did all of this for, or why I'm still keeping at it. There's no point to my sadness, and there's no point to my success either. I have a girlfriend, I have a job, a mortgage, a dog, and 'friends'. I don't really care for any of them. I could live without them and it'd be the same life. For the first time I really have no idea what it is I'm meant to do or be or even feel. Before at least I had some kind of grounding, a direction. Now there's nothing.