/lit/ - Literature

how to win friends and influence people by dale carnegie

right?

>>2032074
first of all thank you for taking the time to write a thoughtful comment.

yes— i do see sort of what you mean.

are you referring to incongruity from piece to piece or rather contained within the piece?

i'm not so sure my goal is to have any particular confluent meaning within a poem, letting it meander a while before settling in a sort of conclusion.

but yes, i do want at least the form to have some congruence within the poem. less jarring phrasing &c.

14.

Slothy self/

I— wife to my/

Dreaming life/

And shies,/

Shuns dawns/

Blue-purple geometry/

Monochrome in hazy architecture/

Seen through straining screen/

Blissfully myopic eyes/


15.

With-drawn, draws a line/

From spine fore-ward/

Stretched a limb and touched/

Fore-finger to door/

Or feeling around—/

Door’s knobby hand-and found/

More or less/

What he was looking for/

i'm looking for the name of, or the author of a poem which ends

"my car my life
my color my wife"

or something similar. does anyone recognize that?