/lit/ - Literature

>>14978087
I'm losing my sanity. I'm not going to make it. I admit it.

I have tons of books and outlines. Whenever I write I kill. I could be better, but I'm apparently alright.

I'm never going to make it though. I have no finished stories in my possession anymore. I can't write due to this crippling madness. Recently I finished a draft, because I realized that everything I write will always initially look like crap to me. I was over the fucking moon that night. I thought I was back, but I'm not. I want it so much it kills me. I'm in so much pain, but I can't walk away from this. I won't let that happen.

Is there anyone out there who knows how this feels? Anyone at all?

How can I overcome the fear of my own work? Every time I read what I've wrote or am about to write, I get this collapsing feeling in me. Do any of you have this? Should I drink? Exercise more? Should I take a bunch of pills or just muscle through like a man?

I don't think I'm going to ever make it guys, but if there's any possibility that I can then I need to try.