/lit/ - Literature

I need to exercise more, my social skills are so fucking degraded. I get most of my socialization through discord, irl I basically only talk to my spouse and my best friend. I got invited to some discord community and they were talking about who they liked or disliked in another server and I wanted to fucking curl up, I am so autistic. I get insecure to the point I can barely talk or respond and it makes everything awkward. I'm not that weird but irl people can tell I'm off, I went to a party when I was in college where a guy I was dating invited me, the people there seemed to shit talk people who weren't in the room. Anyway I didn't know anyone so I was filtering through rooms and I walked into one and someone said "I think ___'s new girlfriend (me) is autistic" n I fucking 180'd outta there so fast. I'm not sure why I'm insecure because after that I wasn't embarassed, yeah I'm autistic it's not really news. I just though "man these people are dicks I gotta get tf outta here". If you're not gonna fit in its not gonna happen so I don't know why I'm afraid to be myself, when I am more confident people tend to like me. I'm not sure I wish I could just unabashedly be myself like I see other people do. I need to stop beating myself up.

Anyway here is my fursona