/lit/ - Literature

I’ve had this unhealthy obsession with him for awhile. This foriegn musician, who I didn’t actually find his voice at all apealing at for the longest time. One of his older bands had okay music, I tested the waters with it, wasn’t exactly my style. Some of his lyrics were awful, some were deliciously exicuted. Then I found his oldest stuff, and his old music that was almost all mellow and acoustic, which his voice aplied to was like ear chocolate. It felt like you were in danger, but you were comfortable with that. As if a dark creature was right behind you and you could feel it’s breath against your neck as claws sensationally touched and ran up the notches of your spine. What started out purely as a joke to bug my friends and meme the shit out of this crappy artist slowly became a morbid unconscious obsession with him. Now I often have dreams he infiltrates, and his personality is very shaped in those dreams though I wouldn’t assume him to be like that if you asked me in real life. A happy man, but a book definition Virgo. He’s platonic towards me, friendly but I think that’s because I worked up to that point. I don’t think we’ll be friends unless I continue to build up a friendship in those dreams, which I think will be very hard, I don’t know how to catch his interest.
Anyways, it’s odd how this character manifested from my stage interest. Yes, I know that what’s in my dreams isn’t really him. I actually feel disgusted with my fixation on this, I hope I don’t blur the lines between simply consuming music and my exciting dreams. I don’t want these dreams to end, I really feel hmm what’s a good way to put it... the opposition of lonely? With this version of my conscience.