/lit/ - Literature

MAMMA MIA, I GOT FUCKING KILLED...said Mario as he walked outside. And the player says "Did Mario SWEAR? Did I...Did I just hear that from the video?" That's my creepypasta, Mario says the fuck word. I wish that was a creepypasta. One night, I was playing Super Mario 64, AND HE SAID A NAUGHTY WORD. While travelling THE END through the Dire Dire Docks, u-upon my usual business, Mario turned his head in a 40 degree angle and said "Shh....FUCK" Then my mother comes into the room and says "ARE YOU SWEARING?" I said "IT WAS MAAARIO, NOT MEE" My moth..oh my god..my mother grabbed me by the ear and she threw me into the bathroom and, SHE THREW ME INTO THE GAME, she fed me more hair, SHE THREW ME INTO THE BATHROOM I WENT "OOOH FFFFF" She jumped on my face, she did the ground pound, she...she swung me around by the hair and said "so long, gay bowser" THIS IS A VERY SPOOKY STORY. That night, I decided to revisit the old Dire Dire Docks for further inspection. This time, Mario pivoted his face towards the camera and said "...CUNT" And he shook it! My mother...ran in, bellows "you will never to how funny that was" Chris shook his head in a really funny way. My mother ran in holding the Mario manual AND SAID NOT YOU AGAIN she started belting me across the mouth with it. Then she started cutting the whapping of my fingers with it. She m..grabbed my lip and starte-MY FINGERS BECAME LONGER. She grabbed my lip and said "If you ever act like that no good Wario again, I'll pull off-" I SAID "IT'S MMMAAAARIO, MOOOM" she was a fake gamer girl the whole time.

“Mario Says the Fuck-word”

>Explain to uni mental health services my lifelong procrastination problem
>can't get started on work or studying until hours before its due
>mentally blocked from start 6-10 page papers until the night before, causing intense mental anguish
>heavily behind on my reading all the time in lit classes
>"I won't prescribe you anything ecause your grades are too high"
I am cursed to suffer a middling, mentally crippled existence because I cope too well with my non existent work ethic
It doesn't matter that I can never get ANYTHING started outside of school, that I have a decayed social circle, no job, and no progress on any of my passions. I cram too well and have too strong a grasp of grammar and syntax to deserve treatment. Maybe I should just let my grades crash this semester, but then I might lose my scholarships