/lit/ - Literature

>>6639543
I was ultimately a deer caught in headlights. I'd make out with her hard, treat her like a sub - but I was too much of a bitch, and was kind of turned off my her desperation (and one point the autistic slut was screaming fuck me fuck me
I think that if I had sex with her then, my life today would be very different

-Today, I haven't seen Melody in years. She's apparently happy with her supposed fun, autistc boyfriend. I know Meech didn't treat her well, I definitely wouldn't have, and she ended up cheating on this other guy. This guy is probably her speed, and I'm happy for her, but if I hung out with them, I would be sure to grope Melody while having fun talking to the guy, I know she'd be too afraid to start drama to say anything, and I know this would prep her to cheat on him when I got her alone, pushed her in a corner and pulled my dick out to make her suck it -

Seeing Melody was an intermittent occurrence, and I didn't like her a ton. I wanted to get closer with Lani. I told her I was starting to really have feelings for her, while feeling nothing. She wouldn't kiss me, and she seemed distant when I tried to get affectionate. The best she gave me was holding my hand at a distance. I felt a little disgusted with myself and the fact that she wouldn't like me
Some combination of me acting autistic, her sensing my lack if sincerity, her thinking that me and Melody were probably fucking, and probably the fact that she was fucking with another guy at the time. Her mom dropped me off at my grandparent's. I called my mom to yell at her for no reason while I banged on the cabinets.

A few nights later me, Lani and Vick met up his ex, Ashley. A trashy looking girl his age
We were at a park, me and Lani over here, Vick and Ashley over there, listening to this song - can't remember the fucking name, the edm beats, the sound of the lyrics, along with that time in life for me had this dark mystifying feeling. The lyrics themselves were terrible, but that song, my shitty Metro phone with a different number because I had lost my iPhone days after this story after blacking out, with It's watery dinging ring tone. Waking up at my grandparents house. Hanging out with Vick and us deciding 'lets call the girls', them answering thinking the same thing, experimenting at being a player with Melody, being socially retarded. Blacking out. The feeling of belonging, All define this period of time for me - the four of us left, with me and Lani holding hands. The thought of her was starting to feel pretty fucking cozy.
We'd periodically kiss and she'd say it didn't feel right. I was nervous, the kiss wasn't amazing, but I now realize that it came from her lack of self esteem. She was wondering if I was just trying to get in her pants.

The four of us made it to a log, and decided to hang out there.
As me and Lani were holding eachother, my feelings for her were genuine; I had never previously felt so close to a girl

Do you read to become wiser or to be entertained?