/lit/ - Literature

My "serious writing" is so juvenile and childish that I don't even have the courage to post it here. Feels really bad. No matter how much I read or write, I'll never amount to 1/20 of the caliber of my favorite authors.

I was born clumsy so I'm horrible at working with my hands. The literary/intellectual world is my only shot at making some use of myself but to my great dismay, I find my performance mediocre even in this realm. I feel lied to because all my life, parents and teachers consistently praised my intellectual skill and made me feel like I was gifted, when I was really just doing the ordinary rote-memorization typical of the school system, and didn't really have any real talent. I've always fantasized about being a great, original, and dependable figure, but now I'm starting to discover that I was born to be nothing more than a fly on the wall of the palaces of sublime majesty, but I'm not humble enough to accept this, and talentless ambition is the most asinine kind of vice. And because of this, I have trouble respecting myself.