/lit/ - Literature

>>19445229
A man walks into a pet shop and says to the owner. “Ok I want to buy a pet, but I don’t want a boring or normal pet, I want something different.” The pet shop owner informs him that he has a talking centipede. “Really?,” the main replied, “How much?” The owner informs him that the talking centipede is £50. Happy with the unusual offering, the man pays the money and takes his new pet home.

On getting home he lays the match box with the centipede in it on the table, opens it and says “Hello Mr. Centipede, fancy going to the pub for a few drinks?” The centipede says nothing. Figuring it must be tired from the journey, he decides to leave it for an hour and try again later.

An hour later he opens the match box and says “Hello mr centipede, fancy going to the pub for a few drinks?” The centipede again says nothing. Starting to get suspicious the man decides he will give it one more hour, and if the centipede doesn’t talk, he will take it back to the shop for a refund.

The man opens the match box one final time and says “Hello mr centipede, fancy going to the pub for a few drinks!?” The centipede says “I heard you the first time!!! I’m still putting my fucking shoes on!”

>>19427341
Sort it out after nationalizing and redistributing property in a proper, original-sense "commisarial dictatorship," to break up all the oligarchies and destroy free-floating funny money, to re-root the people in the soil and expose the "rent" and "debt" collecting nonproducing parasites for who they are

Autarky is its own reward, Cambodia had the right idea

>>15249048
>this new guy was straight up making airplane noises.