/lit/ - Literature

>>15606484
>intellectuals
>your pic

I used to like philosophy a lot butnow i only care about ethic. Gnoseology is almost completely irrelevant questions that end up being a semantic debate (specially the methaphisic part).
Methaphyisics is even worse, form the start, it allways was pointless and nonsensical retard speech.
An example of this is: Rationalists vs empiricists, subjetivism vs objetivism in gnoseology, predestination, free will, etc.

>woke up too early at 8 am
>browsed internet on phone in bed instead of sleeping more
>started working
>worked
>finished working
>played vidya for a short time before
>intended to go for a walk and then jog but felt too tired
>have been browsing internet and will now read until sleep

>be me yesterday
>woke up, did work, finished work at around 5.30 and went for a walk because it was so sunny
>went for a long, probably nostalgia inducing, kino walk, while listening to Cum Town
>came home, had a medium junk food binge and felt so fat
>woke up this morning
>felt normal (but still need to lose weight)
>played vidya
>went to store to buy coffee
>played vidya, drank coffee
>read book (lower-midwit non-fiction book published in past few years)
>now eating

Yesterday's walk was very kino. I listened to most of the Eric Weinstein interview with Bret Easton Ellis and the first half of it where they reminisce over their youths in Los Angeles was super kino kill yourself for not being a rich handsome Californian tier. Then they talked more about politics and it was kind of cringe. I had to switch to Cum Town. I listened to an episode made in early 2019 and the quality is much higher than now.

Work is becoming a grind, but thankfully I will move divisions soon. There is so much process and bureaucracy.

I made a topic yesterday that had an OP with just the text below. It is something I always worry about. I don't even find solidarity with 4chan any more. It's filled with normies.

>I will never ever have sex with a woman without paying for it unless I ask one out and risk being laughed at and humiliated or make an online dating profile and receive no matches because only Chads get any attention

The vidya I'm playing is almost over and I feel so sad. I've played it for over 100 hours.

>be me yesterday
>woke up, did work, finished work at around 5.30 and went for a walk because it was so sunny
>went for a long, probably nostalgia inducing, kino walk, while listening to Cum Town
>came home, had a medium junk food binge and felt so fat
>woke up this morning
>felt normal (but still need to lose weight)
>played vidya
>went to store to buy coffee
>played vidya, drank coffee
>read book (lower-midwit non-fiction book published in past few years)
>now eating

Yesterday's walk was very kino. I listened to most of the Eric Weinstein interview with Bret Easton Ellis and the first half of it where they reminisce over their youths in Los Angeles was super kino kill yourself for not being a rich handsome Californian tier. Then they talked more about politics and it was kind of cringe. I had to switch to Cum Town. I listened to an episode made in early 2019 and the quality is much higher than now.

Work is becoming a grind, but thankfully I will move divisions soon. There is so much process and bureaucracy.

I made a topic yesterday that had an OP with just the text below. I don't even find solidarity with 4chan any more. It's filled with normies.

>>I will never ever have sex with a woman without paying for it unless I ask one out and risk being laughed at and humiliated or make an online dating profile and receive no matches because only Chads get any attention

The vidya I'm playing is almost over and I feel so sad. I've played it for over 100 hours.

What are some books for someone ideologically burnt out, a loser meek charismaless ugly beta male who has almost left his 20s, has a job but is clearly a societal outcast, has no passion in anything, no gf ever, no major hopes, etc.?

>started reading a book of sci-fi short stories
>can't stand it after 3 pages, stop reading
>300 pages in to another novel, an acclaimed midwit modern novel
>given up on it
>reading a lower midwit non-fiction book, think it's ok
>reading the bible, when I can bother
>will finish it for the pseud cred

I think i've only enjoyed around 5 novels in the past 5 years. I enjoy non-fiction a lot more after reading almost only novels for a long period.

I have already seen two and a half (two Staceys and one qt) day ruining girls- ones where I see them and my day is ruined because I realise they fuck ten Chads a day and consider me a disgusting loser. The two Staceys were walking together and looked university aged. They were both blonde and almost looked "homely" enough to not be full Staceys but you can tell they are because of the cropped top of one of them. They seemed like the upper middle class understated Stacey, where you know they fuck a rugby team a week but they act quiet and normal during the day time. The qt looked like one of those girls who gets with bohemian, witty, 6'2" English Literature majors and who strings along socially adept betas.

I did some boring administrative stuff this morning and had 3 ice cream bars. I then went outside. I am currently drinking Starboocks at eets pyoorest. Yesterday I read most of a short sci-fi book at the library. I will finish it today for the pseud cred but it's not that good.

I was outside yesterday when the daylight went away and it becomes dark. At that point I always feel like a loser for not being indoors and working on something. I feel like a dumb loser because the normies have just spent 8 hours working on something and advancing their lives while I, with my lack of any scheduling, have wasted my day. In London the streets are still busy and some libraries are still open, so I can walk around and feel busy albeit loserish. In my home city, the evening would mark the silence of basically everywhere and signify an utter lack of motivation. Even in London some busy train stations become dead at 9 pm. I wish I lived in Manhattan.

I feel like such a loser living in a small flat when everyone on tv lives in a mansion. I just want a desk and chair combination in my flat which isn't optimised to rape my lower back.

I feel like I need to create my own sense of order. I avoid writing down my goals or things I want to do because I see all systems or order as self-limiting and like cucking myself. I hope I will wake up one day and start being hard working but I've remained lazy for years.

>expected a thread bashing classical liberalism
>it's a catgirl thread

>woke up
>drink coffee, browse internet
>go to job for retailcuck job but only a part time one
>go back home, eat healthy food
>it's such a sterile day
>go outside
>go for a pointless walk while listening to podcasts
>read 40 pages of the dense, pseudy, boring but extremely famous book in the car
>currently planning to have a fast food binge, then a junk food binge, then watching QT with pol, then I'll give up junk food tomorrow (yesterday's McDonalds binge didn't seem "definitive" enough to mark the border between my binging self and the start of my real life)
>currently drinking Starboocks

Being fat is demoralising. I'm so impatient when it comes to anything. A well structured exercise routine, no junk food, and good sleep beats hard exercise. Boring applied autism beats inspiration: this is the modern world summed up.

I watched a vlog of an ivy league student and felt sad. He does an interesting subject and so many extracurriculars. Elite Murrikan students are all type A producerbulls. I am jealous. Though in the UK people don't need to work this hard because they're already sorted by poshness of accent.

Flashback 1: Aimlessly walking around the Liverpool Street station area on an extremely hot and sunny bank holiday, with absolutely nothing to do.

Flashback 2: My last exam of a university year, on a cloudy day. I remember going home after the exam for a subject I gave no fucks about, at a university where I had no friends, and realising how uninspiring it was.

Flashback 3: Driving on a hot summer (between university years, so no life pressure) morning to a part time job, on track for being late (as usual and no hecks given, lol).

I simply feel cucked by everything I do, don't do, and how I do them. I hate all oppressive spooks yet I am a slave to habit.

To develop my theory further: Habit is not conscious, and it could be considered cucky to let yourself be a spectator to your own actions. But the character count stops me from writing more.

>woke up
>bought lots of non-junk food yesterday
>eat a day's worth of non-junk food, drank coffee, browsed internet
>went outside in car but weather was bad and my car's heating wasn't working so I didn't read in the car, I just had a Starboocks and went back home to watch Federer Vs Nadal
>buy junk food on way home; can't remember what justification I thought but I'm sure it's the last binge
>have the small binge
>Federer Vs Nadal is cancelled
>waste time on mindless internet browsing
>now it's 9:17 pm and I've decided to leave the gym until tomorrow

I feel so scammed by Starbucks. The people there are such ubernormies.

The book I'm reading is so boring, it's unreal.

>be me during previous two days
>wake up, browse internet and drink coffee, go for a walk outside while feeling sad, have a large fast food binge, go back home, maybe a bit more junk food while telling myself it's the last time, browse internet instead of read, don't go to gym
>be me today
>woke up
>browsed internet, drank coffee
>went to full time retailcuck interview: the store was DEAD and 8 hours there would seem like an eternity, though I doubt I passed
>had another retailcuck phone interview and interview invite (<20 hours a week)
>weighed myself and I'm now 265 lbs: today has to be the last junk food day or else wtf
>plan to go for a walk, read, and not sure what else today

I barely read anymore. I am currently reading a boring 600 page pseudy non-fiction book. I feel guilty when I read only one book at a time. I feel guilty when I read more than one book at a time.

I wrote down a checklist of stuff I want to do (just minor habits or one-off things) and I almost deleted it because it felt like an oppressive spook.

I'm so sad that Brexit is being cucked. I really hope that May's deal doesn't pass. May's deal is a stab in the back of the public. A delay would be a spit in the face. A new referendum in any form would literally be the establishment shitting in the public's face. But I'm such a loser for paying attention to politics. I wish I was one of those ignorant highly paid Remain voters who say stupid shit like, "Leave voters were tricked." Being blackpilled is a full time job.

Jogging as a fatty is a joke. I remember randomly deciding to start jogging as a sedentary healthy weight person many years ago and I was easily better than now. All that jogging in the past few years was a waste compared to what avoiding junk food would have done. And I would have saved shitloads of money. But setting myself rules feels like surrendering to spooks.

I googled "LinkedIn [my future graduate job] Cambridge university]" and felt sad. I can't outnormie these people.

>woke up
>drank coffee and started reading a non-pseud-cred-filled fiction book
>gave up on it after 10 pages
>started a really pseud cred filled old non-fiction book and read 40 pages
>went jogging
>ate regular food and browsed internet
>went driving outside
>didn't go walking but drive around, had a bag of sweets and chocolate, browsed internet on phone while drinking Starboocks
>feel the good sort of tired, after the jogging
>plan to go back home and browse internet and read

When I now read non pseud cred fiction, I feel cucked by the author when they deviate in any way from pure enjoyment. I have lost patience for it.

I have 3 retailcuck interviews in the upcoming days and I live in fear of getting a job and losing my free time, despite needing the money (2 months of full time minimums wage work would make me feel rich). Can't stand full time work. Can't stand part time work (full time suffering but more time until financial freedom). My previous retail job was over 40 hours a week and it was a total soul sucker.

London flashback: Early on in my job, when I went for a job interview during my lunch break and was worried about being noticed for my lateness (lol). I travelled a few underground stops to get to the other place. What innocent days.

>woke up
>drank coffee and browsed internet
>went to retailcuck job interview
>went back home
>went outside
>the weather isn't very good
>currently having Starboocks and browsing internet
>have a book in the car but I haven't bothered reading it
>plan to binge on fast food, go home, read, go to gym in evening, then watch qt with pol
>will likely not go to gym or read

I have no idea how to meme myself in to making hard work one of my favourite memes.

>be me yesterday
>woke up, read a book, go outside and drink coffee, buy some junk food and go back home to watch tennis and binge, mindlessly browse internet, go to gym at night for first time in maybe 2 weeks and lift weights (squat almost 290 lbs for 5 sets of 8 reps), then go home and finish reading a 500+ page book
>be me today
>woke up, read a little bit, slept again, browsed internet, went outside to feel sad
>currently drinking Starboocks
>plan to go walking, maybe binge, read, go to gym again in evening

Nothing else to report, really. I saw a depressingly large number of happy hipster student types. I saw some 6s and 6.5s and thought to myself, "15 years ago they would be loading up on hopeless beta orbiters and maybe stringing along a load of betas, maybe handing out infrequent sex, but these days they settle for nothing but Chads". Of course, I've always been too ugly to be in any solar system.

I will start a high level pseud cred book, one of the pseudiest ever, soon and it will be boring as fuck.

I felt like such a sucker when I heard the price for my Starboocks coffee. The regular black coffee tastes like hot water sometimes so I bought something else. Of course, what I'm really buying is the feeling of being a busy non-aimless person who needs coffee to function, because I am a pathetic consumercuck.

I still haven't figured out how to motivate myself to do productive stuff in my free time.

>woke up
>browsed internet and drank coffee
>went to a retailcuck job interview
>went back home and drank cola
>went outside but it's already 4.14 pm so I'll have a short walk, then maybe coffee, then a binge, then reading, then the gym, then watching qt with /pol/

Even though the interview was short and easy, having anything at all on my schedule felt like an oppressive spook. A patrician intellectual such as myself is sensitive to all spooks.

Literally nothing else to report. After two days of summer, the weather is back to being dull as fuck. The BBC website says that in Los Angeles it is cloudy and 19 degrees Celsius.

>woke up
>browsed internet and had coffee
>went jogging, which felt good
>went outside and walked around
>it's hot and sunny; it's literally summer as fuck: the day (TYBGW)
>felt sad after seeing lots of Staceys and qts
>currently drinking Starboocks
>plan to go for another walk and then maybe one last binge, then reading at home, then the gym at night

I am mourning for my future 9-5 wagecuck self who will miss all daylight hours. How do people cope now? I remember back when I worked in London there was an incredibly hot day where I skipped even going in to the office for my zero work job and I walked around Regents Park. I saw lots of people enjoying life during a work day. The people who say "DUDE EVERYBODY SUFFERS 9-5 JUS GRIND BRO" are filthy liars.

I saw students walking around, in their uncucked idyllic lives. I felt sad at seeing that and at being an ugly nofriends loser when I was a student, being denied any good memories.

I haven't figured out how to motivate myself to do productive stuff in my free time. Ever since I have been blackpilled about my life as an ugly male, my motivation has been completely gone.

>woke up earlier than usual after having a large McDonalds binge yesterday and not going to the gym
>drink coffee, browse internet
>google "LinkedIn SpaceX engineer" and feel demoralised while looking at profiles of people with high paid jobs they love
>read around 70 pages yesterday and tell myself I'll read a lot in the coming days for pseud cred and inspiration but the idea fails to inspire me at all because reading is a consumercuck activity
>go outside to feel sad about life
>walk for a while on a warm but uninspiring day
>listen to a podcast that has a politician who had an easy life and who is now successful
>feel demoralised as I get back in my car from my walk, but then feel more motivated for some reason
>plan to have one last binge today: I think simply considering this Pavloved me in to a better mood
>drink one last Starbucks latte, have a large burger king binge
>go to the shiny supermarket with lots of student Staceys and buy junk food for my last junk food binge ever
>have the junk food at home (can't finish it due to fullness) and waste time on internet
>now it's 11.24 pm

I was invited for a job interview for a full time retailcuck job that would let me save more money than I need within 2 months but I was struck with terror as I imagined being indoors on a day like this: uninspired as fuck.

If that's not truly the last binge, I don't see how I have hope

>Nihilism is childish
>so how do i overcome it
>you dont
So how do I overcome nihilism if it is so childish?

>woke up
>had a bit of junk food, coffee, mindlessly browsed internet
>found out my NEETbux was less than I expected for the past month, which was a bit bad but nothing catastrophic
>went walking around a park, while feeling sad about life
>currently drinking Starboocks
>plan to go back home, binge, browse internet, then go to the gym

I'm just so bored. I can't get out of my 5+ year depression / burnout, though I see it as more of an utter lack of motivation.

I hate having spooks.

It's funny that I still can't really see the value of money. I don't feel pain when paying £3 for coffee. I'm sure that I'm also paying for the idea of myself as a non-materialistic thinker (or, at least, a non-cuck), plus the caffeine clearly gives me an aimless energy and optimism.

>woke up at 10 am with an alarm because I had an interview for a retailcuck job
>drink coffee, go to interview, go back home and do chores
>drink coffee while eating the junk food I didn't eat yesterday
>get message saying I was rejected after a job interview for a retailcuck job I went to a few days ago- thought I'd get it but didn't want it but now kind of wanted it like a little cuckslave wanting a shed
>go outside to feel sad about life
>thotfus everywhere, which makes me feel sad
>go to park to walk around
>listen to the Joe Rogan podcast with the guy that crossed the Antarctic and I feel like a slug in comparison
>reminds me of the David goggins podcast months ago which made me feel motivated until I went to bed that night
>now that I'm starting my job later this year, I looked up people I used to know on LinkedIn and i realised that I'm not even behind in life, career wise
>have a really fucking big fast food meal, so I've had all three of McDonalds, KFC, and burger king in the past week
>buy junk food but eat none of it: saving it for tomorrow's One Last Binge
>mindlessly browse internet and it's 11:38 pm right now

I keep giving myself final deadlines to get out of my rut or else I'll self impose rules, but I then delete the rules ahead of time because I think they're self limiting. If I don't give up junk food tomorrow, I don't know wtf I'll do.

And I need to mentally condition myself to do productive stuff in my free time. But again, if I actually try anything to change my mentality, I feel like a phony. It's like I get in a boxing match with the world and while they batter me with their spooks I tie myself up and tell myself I should remain spookless.

London flashback: Walking through Liverpool Street Station on a sunny day during a 2 hour lunch break, seeing that my second paycheck came through, getting a monkey brain endorphin rush, as I then pay £4 for sandwiches and £3 for coffee while telling myself that I'll spend money wisely afterwards.

Guess who I am?

Guess where I am?

Guess why I'm here?

Guess how I'm feeling?

Guess what popular fast food restaurant I gorged at last night in a vain attempt to overcome my everythingstential crisis?

Late night Londonfrog

I binged and watched qt with pol. It's 2 am. I am fairly sure that I will now give up junk food and do a small amount of productive work after I wake up. But I am offended at the idea of using my daylight hours on anything other than enjoyment. But I walked around a park today and it wasn't rewarding.

>woke up early at 8.30 am to go to a job interview at 10.30 am
>go to interview and it was one of those really casual interviews where I have a zero pressure conversation and will get rejected later
>the guy asked me what I do in my (huge amounts of) free time and I couldn't say anything other than reading and exercising- he tried to draw out more but I don't think saying "wasting gigantic amounts of time in the midst of a 5+ year long everythingstential crisis" would improve my chances of getting the job
>go back home to have yesterday's spare junk food: a tub of Ben and Jerry's, sweets, plus coffee
>have now gone outside to feel sad about life
>planning maybe one last binge today before I start my real life tomorrow (maybe a subway binge)
>will walk around a park and have Starboocks right now, have the binge at home, then read until the evening, when I will maybe go to the gym then watch qt with pol

Maybe this is the sugar and caffeine making me say this, but I have a good feeling about starting my real life tomorrow.

As soon as I walked in to the office I felt this oppressive wagecuck aura, even though it was a fancy modern office.

The interviewer exposed the fact that I'm a consumercuck, at best, and not a producerbull. Normies go on holidays on weekends. I have years of free time and do fuck all. I would also out mindless internet browsing in to a sub-consumercuck category. But I felt no pressure at the interview, which was new.

>woke up at 10 am
>browse internet while drinking coffee
>go jogging
>realise how fat I am
>left house to drive around and feel sad about life
>have multiple job interviews coming up, one prestigious graduate job, one ok office job, two retailcuck jobs
>told myself I'd have no more junk food but I can't think of anything except burgers that will make me happy about life right now
>will walk around a park, then drink Starbucks at eets pyoorest, and then consider what I'll do for the rest of the day
>have barely read anything for the past few days I have descended below consumercuckoldry

Life goes on. It's impossible to have any motivation in life.