/lit/ - Literature

>>19666032
>I'd say it feels to bold.
I did it for multiple reasons. I want the book to start with a slap to the face. I want that first statement to raise more questions then it gives actual information. Most of all this opening sentence is paid off in a major way in the end of the book in an even bigger shock moment.
>I thought it looked rather condensed
This opening part is supposed to convey urgency or sorts. It slows down immediately after but the point is to get to the first story piece as fast as possible while establishing several dozen details half of which are core throughout the rest of the book and half of which are completely irrelevant but make the story turn like mad