/lit/ - Literature

Alright, filling 20-30$ from the next 10 wishlists that are posted, so post away!

bump, so nobody on here has any intelligent input?

>>804840
have any actual intelligent critique or only capable of reaction shots when you most likely are not capable of any better assumed through lack of text?

bump

OP again:
i was also thinking for a twist to the story, possibly the concept of dreaming.

"i dreamed that i fell asleep and had a dream. I had a dream within a dream. i then woke up in my dream and reflected on the dream i'd had within my dream. i then woke up and reflected on the reflection of my dream within my dream."

OK, so possibly George Christopher wakes up and reflects upon the dream as an elderly man (this is the mad who has been dreaming). Then this elderly man wakes up and all of the story has been the dream of a young boy (8 years old or so), he then reflects upon the reflection of the dream, not able to understand anything, he simply forgets about it as it means nothing to him..

what you think?

OP again: continuation.
___________________________

Every day was a good day, overwhelmed with pure ecstasy as i floated mindlessly through snow capped mountains and deep crevasses of which were home to strange illuminating monstrous beings. I drifted easily through the atmosphere and landed softly upon a tower made of atmonic particles, silent as i stood still yet completely in control of every sense. It was as though i were living in a timeframe outside of myself, able to predict the very nature of my actions before the thought of the act controlled me. I stood still for a long time and conjured majestic beauties of ancient realms of an extensive hyper-reality which amused and fascinated me. I abruptly dove and broke free from the tower of which i named Life.

OP here:
This is as far as i've got.
any advice, edit's or critique greatly appreciated (even if you choose to say its crap, then also greatly appreciated).

_____________________________________________

George Christopher, age 45, father of two. A normal family man struck by a terrible tragedy; he has been in a terrible accident. He may never walk again.

But his mind has entered another realm. A realm where any boundary can be overcome with the divine power of the mind. A place where nothingness contains something and something could be anything, where anything contains nothing and nothing is the something you have searched for all along.

George Christopher has entered... the Twilight Zone.

I lay here a peaceful man, flesh blood and guts organized into this supreme vessel. Mind distanced from this very mysterious creature of which it lies within. I hear the sounds like thunger, "Dad please wake up, it's me Billy. Dad please", who and where these sounds originate from i do not know, only sounds from an outer darkness deceiving and luring me back into a world of insanity, i wish not return. Again, the crackled sounds from an external realm boom through the skies, "Sir, you've been in an accident. If you can hear this please listen closely. You have been blinded and paralyzed from your neck down", These sounds from within the darkness filling my concious with the most peculiar tinge of self abominating slander, for i know i am not blind nor paralyzed as the beauty that lies beneath my feet is of an almost nauseating incomprehendable magnificence. I can walk, run, fly, swim and dive unlike any other of the beasts nesting in my land, why these unkown sounds instill fear inside of me was unkown, although they triggered something inside of me whenever they chose to intrude, an emotion or sense i was not yet familiar with.

OP:

typo's are because i handwrite my work and am a very average typist. i will type the rest out now with few edits i have made to this intro.

what do you guys think about this intro to a short story im writing.


In dreamland, any boundary can be overcome with the divine power of the
mind.
A place where nothingness contains something and something could be
anything, where anything contains nothing and nothing is the something
you have searched for all along.

I lay here a man, flesh. blood and guts organized into this supreme
vessel. Mind distanced from this mysterious vessel which carries it.
They say to me 'wake up, wake up already please dad.' but who they are I
do not know, sounds from an outward darkness deceiving and luring me
back into a world of insanity I wish not return. 'sir, you've been in an
accident. You have been blinded from the accident and you are paralyzed
from your neck down', there we go again... The voices from withing the
darkness filling my world with the the most peculiar tinge of self
abominating slander. I know I am not paralyzed for I can walk, run, fly
and swim unlike any others in my land.

stop being a bitch and post it

>>804457

>>804536
nothing, stop entering gay contests which demand certain essays from you and write something creative.

>>804485
i second this

>>804459

what a bunch of shit, seriously...you expect to be a published author with concepts like that...

>>profit is good

you and 5million others are writing exactly the same bunch of shit and you are not special at all

>>571213
No, me.