/lit/ - Literature

>>10563576
I could say what you just said in about 1/4th the words. And why the fuck is some Greek philosopher's name randomly thrown in there? I had to google that shit and the sentence still doesn't make any sense. What the fuck is this? This is shit.

>>10563572
I get what its trying to say, and I like that its trying to say it, but it gets so stuck up its own ass the message is drowned out by confusing heavy-handed prose.
Tone it down, and have you ever even heard of this thing called a fucking paragraph?

Though it's not entirely bad, it does need to be more concise because nobody would want to read this shit the way it's written now.

>>10563562
Who's insecure? Bitch, I'm the best!

>>10563552
Mother fucker, how did I know you would point that out? You ain't shit, and it was a typo that I didn't feel like deleting my post to correct but you thinking that means shit just proves my point more faggot.

Now you going to post something so I can really rip into your dumb ass or what?

>>10563540
stupid fuck
10 x (the culture of at least 90% of the bitches on this board)
That equals... okay, guess you got a point you uncultured faggot but it wasn't 0 you stupid fuck.
THIS is exactly what I'm talking about with you bitches thinking your all smart and shit.
Now quit wasting my time bitch, this thread is for critiquing writing.

>>10563500
And I'm still 10x more cultured than a fuckwit like you who thinks that means shit.
Now post your shit or get out, faggot.

Moby Dick is shit.

It's been a long time so I'm not sure if any of you bitches remember me, although you really should, because I'm the best reviewer to ever grace this pretentious community of wannabes and trudge through the sub-par bullshit you bitches always throw at me.

Right, so its simple.
1. Post your shit
2. I'll tell you why you suck

>>6956333
Bitch, I never try hard. It comes naturally.

So /lit/ I realized I have been going about this all wrong.
My entire life I have been trying to come up with original story ideas, and learning to write extremely solid prose so I can eventually use my mind to contribute something meaningful to the world that will be remembered for generations to come.
What I should have been doing is just typing my ass off and putting down 20,000 words a week (bitch, that's only 3k a day, I can knock that shit out in about 2 hours without even trying). That way I can put out an 80,000 word novel every month, sell it for 5-10k, and be making a really fucking solid income.
As my shitty little series gains more and more popularity among the plebs of the world I'll be getting more and more per novel until I'm pulling down a mil a year. Eventually, I'll build such a large empire that I can just live off the royalties and hire ghost writers to write under my name. Then I'm making millions and not even having to work! Just got to go to some lame ass book signing from time to time, and shake hands with my legion of neckbeards who are hooked on my shitty fantasy novels.

I'll be rich!

>>6914843
Don't plan to, actually. I just wrote that for a friend, to show him how its done, and ended up liking how it came out.

See, on a whim he decided he wanted to write a story about space cowboys. He showed me his first chapter, which was so god-awfully bad it was beyond redemption even with my superior editing skillz. His 'prose' was basically like reading a checklist of shit you might see in the future.
So, I says to him "Bitch!" I says "Let me show you how its done." And I punched that out for him real quick.

you bitches wish you were this nice

Teeg walked around the outer edge of the skywalk, his hand sliding against the smooth metal railing. He was twenty three sectors up, in the commercial district. He had just finished getting his license renewed and was now preparing to head back to his headquarters on the other side of the city.

He missed the cowboy days, before the profession of bounty hunting had become so regulated. He was one of the last to conform to the new ways, but when the federation started throwing 'rouge' bounty hunters in jail, he figured it would be beneficial to just bite the bullet and accept that times were changing. Here on Earth, the federation had too much control. You could try and resist, but chances are it wouldn't work out for you in the long run. On Mars, things were different, or so he had heard. The same regulations were in place, technically, but there was a serious lack of federal law enforcement, meaning the cowboys were free to just continue on as they always had.

He looked over the railing of the skyway. If you stuck your head out far enough, and looked to the side, you could look across the seemingly endless crevice between buildings that just went on and on until it disappeared into a thin ray of light. Looking up, you could see just a touch of natural daylight, peaking in between the steel behemoths that lined the sky. For the most part you would just see railings and maybe a person or two poking their heads out, same as you were currently doing.

You could look down, but you probably wouldn't want to. Most people who lived fifteen sectors or higher liked to just pretend that there wasn't a down, and who could blame them? Looking down was like looking into the deep dark caverns of hell, and if you ever were to actually go down there you would swear that's exactly what it was. Or it was at least as close to hell as your were likely to find here in the realm of mortals.

Hadn't god once punished mankind for trying to build a structure that could challenge the heavens? It was called the tower of Babel, if Teeg remembered correctly. Well, god must have lost that battle, some ten thousand years after the rebirth of his son, because that's exactly what mankind had done. They did it again and again and again, until the heavens themselves were the stomping grounds of men, and their towers raised from the earth with one elongated middle finger piercing the sky and shouting 'fuck you'.

>>6914337
Bitch, you don't know me!

I enjoy Stephen King
I enjoyed ASOIAF (up till book 4)
I read Moby Dick and thought it was shit (it really is, /lit/)
I read fan fictions
I write fan fictions
I'm still 10x more cultured than at least 90% of the bitches on this board

>>6910294
shit nigga, that's the most valuable post in this thread. On the surface it may look like a bunch of nonsense, but if you look a little deeper and read between the lines a bit, you will see there is a solid thought provoking message hidden within the text.

If you don't see it that just means ur a pleb.

BITCH

Bitches be trippin;
trippinz mah bitches;
where ma money ho?

>>6874415
Oh yeah? I bet you're really fucking proud of yourself, but you know what?
you should be
asshole.

>>6874376
ya, I know right? Fuck those people.

tfw I secretly always wanted to go to school for writing but never had a chance

>Or do successful writers just _feel_ the urge to write at a young age without any particular goal in mind?
I think its mostly this.

People who go to school for writing make me sick. Get a real job, assholes.

>>6874305
Oh, son of a BITCH! Not you again.

See that OP? Mr. Capocrates brings up a very valid point about the importance of editing.

>>6872985
I think everyone who has a high level of education then me has a superiority complex... I dropped out of highschool.

Fuck those douchebags! YOU AINT BETTER THAN MEEEEE!!!!!!

AHAAAHAAAHAHFAHSULFHAELUFbaeyiufhaebuvygweyviberiyvbe8oh43g9824 -5981335?$%T^#@%Y@$%&$@%&^$qehrejetj

>>6873877
Bitch, some of us have jobs!

I write 10,000 words a week, does that count for anything?

Have you done a lot of reading in your life? That's usually a good way to build a foundation.
Other then that, just realize your not going to get it right on the first draft. Even professional writers need to edit their work before its any good. Not doing that is the biggest mistake new writers make. You have to read and reread your work every day, making slight changes along the way.

Something else I do is I actually read out loud to myself. That makes it easier to pick up on akward sentences and whatnot.

As for structuring plot and characters.
Avoid exposition. What I mean by that is don't explain things as some flighty all knowing god in the sky, explain things through your characters eyes. Less is more, write in a way that mirrors how your characters might think, if that means leaving out certain explanations of things then fine, let the reader fill in the blanks himself.

Hope that helps, bro. I'm sure some of these other /lit/ fags can give you some more pointers.

>>6866036
Just tell me you liked the part where I described a building as a middle finger flipping off god and I can go to sleep happy.

I still have no idea wtf you are saying, but, I respect you.