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/jp/ - Otaku Culture

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8717096 No.8717096 [Reply] [Original]

You wake up in Gensokyo and see this.
You are tied, lying on the floor, and these yokai are looking intently at you while talking in japanese
You are pretty sure that you will not survive if you don't do something.
The bondage is pretty loose.
You spot the remains of a fellow /jp/er nearby.
There is a weird noise outside.
What do you do

>> No.8717101

tell them to suck my cock dude

>> No.8717108


Badass yet the only one who'd know what you say is Yukari.

You'd probably cause her to chuckle at your resistance.

>> No.8717114

clearly they tied you loosely intentionally, they probably enjoy watching you squirm. Also, if they want you dead you're pretty much fucked anyway so not much you can do.

>> No.8717122

I plead and beg for them to spare my life like a true omegle.

>> No.8717123

Ask for sex before death.
If you're gunna die, die pleasurably.

>> No.8717126

Ask for them to marry me.

>> No.8717137

I'd ask for a sake and paizuri

>> No.8717142
File: 35 KB, 411x411, 1316978428608.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Eating other sentient beings is wrong.

>> No.8717145

Oh come on you faggots,

>>8717122 's answers for /jp/.

>> No.8717146

it's fine if it's consensual

>> No.8717147

Ask them to turn off the blacklight

>> No.8717150

Looks like there's no reason to be afraid, if I die, I'm ending in Hakugyokurou anyway.

>> No.8717151

Go catatonic, hopefully it happens quick.

>> No.8717156

>eating creatures is wrong
>posts okuu, who swallowed a live god because someone promised her power

She wasn't even hungry

>> No.8717159

"Shikieiki Yamaxanadu is one of the Yama who judge the dead to decide whether they go to Heaven, Hell, Hakugyokurou, or get reincarnated. "

"The term Hakugyokurou comes from Chinese legends of the Tang Dynasty (唐朝). It was said to be the place where artists go after death."

How wrong you are.

>> No.8717167

I say "Please be gentle" to Yukari of course.

>> No.8717168

But I am an artist.

Well, okay, an autist. Close enough.

>> No.8717176
File: 134 KB, 850x850, 1314312536363.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

The bondage is obviously loose on purpose. The eaten /jp/er is probably there to rile me up.
And I'm putting my bets on that Yukari knows english. She probably knows hundreds of languages. And I bet she knows that I know she knows english. She just wants to watch me squirm like a worm.

In fact, I bet the whole point of this is to see if I can come up with any clever plan of escape just to entertain them. Or else they would have already eaten me. But they will probably eat me anyway if I bore them. So the whole idea is to at least come up with something clever to spare myself for the time being, as I'm sure if I don't act fast they will quickly bore of me. You can tell by the look in their eye and their whispers that they expect something of me.

As for the noise outside, I don't have a clue. But I'm not putting bets on whatever it is trying to save me.

>> No.8717177


Leonardo da Vinci was a bit autistic.

>> No.8717173

a) Free myself, run and zig-zag like a motherfucker.

b) Free myself, bow and ask in English/Spanish/French/Italian if Yukari would spare my life if I became her servant.


>> No.8717185

Why is Ran the most physically intimidating?

>> No.8717189


She's tall.

>> No.8717192

Ask Yukari to grant me an honorable death. Dying in combat with one of these sorcerous creatures would be compensation enough for my detainment and murder.

>> No.8717199
File: 166 KB, 600x886, b37e021f45e914b2ad7e816adabbac63bda01ea8.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Tails give her a larger presence, and she's leaning forwards a little bit

>> No.8717194


>> No.8717205

Beast girl.

>> No.8717212

There's a special clause. Those who are killed by Yuyuko's ability will go to Hakugyokurou, regardless.

I would imagine that this has something to do with the fact that both her and the Saigyou Ayakashi have the same ability, and said tree is stuck in Hakugyokurou, and Yuyuko's corpse is part of the seal for it. In fact, if I remember right, the seal that was put on that tree is actually a manifestation of the boundary between life and death.

>> No.8717213

Request a duel with Youmu so I can honorably die by her blade.

>> No.8717220

Homeward Bone out.

>> No.8717224
File: 121 KB, 728x1064, hblackmaoh012_074.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

ask if it's possible to do it all in one go

>> No.8717228

I think there are more terrifying youkai to be captured by.

I could be wrong, but I never thought that Yuyuko and Yukari were the sort for killing humans at random. Obviously they don't *like* humans as some other youkai do, but I never imagined them as being any worse than indifferent to humans.

>> No.8717235

Light bondage gives me large erections.
Somebodies taking responsibility

>> No.8717238

Yuyuko is gluttonous and unladylike; she would eat anything.

>> No.8717245

Secondary detected.

She does like to eat, but regardless, you are almost entirely wrong.

>> No.8717248

Where did you hear that? Assuming if it is true you would still have to rely on her using that ability before someone else used theirs or even didn't bother with a spell card. You're just /jp/sie, you pose no threat.

>> No.8717252

Not canon. She eats quite a lot, but I don't see why she would want to eat a human.

>> No.8717253

I would love to be eaten by Yukari.

>> No.8717254

Tear the bindings apart, do a giant backflip and land feet-on-seat on my motorbike, tear off my shirt and reveal the two halberds I was hiding the whole time, wield them one in each hand, then ride it into battle while screaming "AMERICA!".
Then the camera will move out of whatever building we're in, show me bursting out of the wall on my motorbike, land 30 feet away (still standing on my motorbike), put on my sun-glasses as their house explodes behind me and I say with an arrogant grin "Fuck yeah.".

>> No.8717255

Quickly retrieve arms from safe.

>> No.8717264

Yes. She does not use her ability on a whim, so chances are, if you die here, you're not going to Hakugyokurou.

Just thought I'd mention it though.

Her page on the wiki says this:
"She has the power to invite mortal souls to death, and those souls who perish this way wind up in Hakugyokurou rather than Heaven or Hell."

But I'm not entirely sure of the actual source for this information...

>> No.8717271

Start running.

When I'm caught, babble incoherently about Gensokyo and throw in random Japanese phrases like that German guy did with Mickey Mouse in Saving Private Ryan.

>> No.8717279

Does Yuyuko remember her life as a human? I'm sure I've read somewhere that she doesn't, but I can't remember the source.

>> No.8717286

Unfortunately, you can't retrieve your arms, as they are tied behind you...

==> Whimper confusedly at not waking up in your cum-encrusted bed.

Your pitiable mewling seems to amuse your female captors. You really hope they don't notice your growing nervous-boner now pushing gently at the confines of your boxers.

>> No.8717285

i quickly remember i'm a youkai too
i tear the bindings apart like paper
say nope to yukari and co
snap fingers
house and their clothes explode into candy

>> No.8717287

Who knew we had a Witch of Certainty here at /jp/.

>> No.8717292

Wakeup DP.

>> No.8717294

Please do not impersonate the OP.

>> No.8717307

But what kind of candy
This is important

>> No.8717303
File: 564 KB, 858x1200, 1302827448477.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

So you're a Youkai, huh?
You know I read a lot. Especially things that have to do with history. I find that shit fascinating. In fact, I don't know if you know this or not, Youkai were spawned by demon niggers.

It's a fact. Youkai have nigger blood pumpin' through their hearts. If you don't believe me, look it up. You see, hundreds and hundreds of years ago the Japanese Miko conquered Gensokyo. And Japanese are niggers. And you youkai were so scared, you had to run off to make your own little fantasy land. Way back then, Youkai were like mythological fairy tales in Japan. Good luck spirits that would help out humans. But, once the Miko moved in there, they changed the whole story. They did so much fuckin' and sealing with the Youkai, they changed history for ever, from good-willed beings that would help out humans to baby-eating ugly monstrosities. I find it absolutely amazing to think that to this day, hundreds of years later, Youkai still give off that baby-eating nigger vibe. I'm just quotin' history. It's a fact. It's written. Your ancestors were nigger youkai. Your great, great, great, great, great-grandmother was sealed by a nigger miko, and had a nigger poem made up about it. That is a fact. Now tell me, am I lyin'?

>> No.8717308

"After becoming a bourei, she thoroughly forgot everything about the time she was alive, and started to enjoy being able to invoke death."

>> No.8717310

Fanon garbage. Also disgusting pro-human propaganda.

>> No.8717314


>> No.8717318
File: 1.08 MB, 2184x2180, RinnoMaribel.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

I'd call out Yukari's real name:


Say stuff about her being Maribel.

Await response.

>> No.8717319

Ask them if they're lesbians or what.

>> No.8717321

Clearly you've never played IN.

>> No.8717322

I think these anons might be on to something.
Getting a boner and acting embarrassed might amuse them, perhaps enough for them to spare you for the time being.
They might take pity and abuse you instead.

If you are worth more as pathetic entertainment, they might not eat you.

>> No.8717324

Ask them to hand me some sake and 

>> No.8717326

I sit up, and begin to sing. In polish. Because, why not.
If anything, this will confuse them. Afterwards, I teleport myself somewhere else, since if I am in Gensokyo (i.e. the place does not exist outside computer games), then this is some kind of phantasy, and thus I can do whatever I want (until I wake up).

>> No.8717337
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>> No.8717341

Nothing, too scared to do anything,

>> No.8717344
File: 43 KB, 401x339, 1328735824976.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

P-please don't eat me, I taste like trash from a back alley dumpster. I know refined ladies such as yourself would eat something as foul as me. I won't ask you to spare my life so freely, I'll work to make up for it. I can move in and out of Gensokyo and steal more delicious humans for you to eat. I know exactly which humans taste good.

Then if I'm lucky, they accept my proposal. I'll move in and out of Gensokyo and club normalfags with hopes and dreams and unparalleled will to live in their sleep with a weapon. Then I drag them back to gensokyo, tie them up and offer them to my youkai captors. My guess is their fear makes them taste better.

I'll continue this until they get bored of me or until I fuck up. It would be better than dying on the spot.

>> No.8717346
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Try to convince them i would not taste good.
If that does not work i challenge them to a game of monopoly.

With a bit of luck they will all end up angry and start another incident, giving me time to escape to the human village or one of the shrines.

>> No.8717354

yeah, except i'm an european youkai, like remilia. not a japanese one.

>> No.8717355

Well, I did admit that she does like to eat.

To say that she's unladylike and will eat anything though, is ridiculous. In fact, she is one of the most elegant and intelligent characters in the entire series, to the point where no one can understand her, and yet she's probably one of the only ones who can understand Yukari.

She just happens to be pretty much the opposite of what people would call "down to earth." She doesn't have any worries at all, so she seems airheaded most of the time.

>> No.8717359

>My guess is their fear makes them taste better

You are correct as adrenaline makes the meat more tenser ans tastier.

>> No.8717367

Since Youmu's corporeal half is human, eating humans would present rather serious health issues for her.

>> No.8717377

She'll just watch. Look at her face, she's completely desensitized already to this ugly show.

>> No.8717380

How exactly did Yukari come to be, anyway?
Is she some timeless thing that's been around forever, or at least as long as there were at least two things in existence?
It seems like details about her are intentionally left rather vague.

>> No.8717395

She was most likely a human that became a youkai in the 1800's or possibly even earlier. That's the most you'll ever know.

>> No.8717397

Every character is left vague. There just isn't that much in Touhou canon.

>> No.8717399
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Think in Umineko terms and Maribel Theory.

But beyond theories, there's only mystery.

>> No.8717405

Yakari doesn't strike me someone who was ever human.

I meant vaguer than usual, we have at least seem small amount of back story about nearly all the other important/reoccurring characters.

>> No.8717411
File: 81 KB, 816x891, 12596104_p0.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>implying Yukari isn't an ancient youkai created out of the very concept of borders invented by humans

>> No.8717419

A youkai is a changed thing. Nothing starts out youkai. If Yukari wasn't human the only other explanation that would make any damn sense would be lunarian, and that makes more or less no sense at all.

>> No.8717422
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Wow, where is THAT from?

>> No.8717446

source please?

>> No.8717452

If this is true, then it raises some questions regarding the physiology of a Youkai.

Biologically, is a Youkai more or less similar to its original form? Would eating foxes cause problems for Ran? Could Alice eat humans without any issues?

>> No.8717450

Not really
Youkai are born in many different ways.

>> No.8717462

they change at least somewhat. see remilia/flandre, they're regular european vampires.

a normal human would get sick from drinking blood, but vampires need it to survive.

>> No.8717465

Not quite.

>> No.8717519

Dude...humans can eat humans without any issue. Alice can eat all the humans she wants.

>> No.8717536

Well, ignoring the easy transfer of disease, there are certain problems with the body's ability to process human meats. As long as you know how to prepare it, and stay the hell away from the brain and nervous system, you should be okay though.

>> No.8717556

Just curious, but aside from the risks of decease transfer (which I understand), what is it that makes eating human meat dangerous? For humans.

>> No.8717578

This is completely unsupported by canon, and is in fact, implied to be false (we know that Yukari has been around for at least a thousand years).
Absolutely and completely false. Youkai can be born as youkai. They can also be born from animals, and objects, and other things. Read PMiSS.
Youkai are more or less the "others" category of species. Any being that is not human, animal, or lunarian, is probably considered a youkai, and the nature of their body would vary widely depending on what type of youkai it is. For example, many of them are very corporeal, but there are plenty of them that aren't very corporeal at all.

>> No.8717582

Various lingering toxins (if eating organs) that the human body has trouble processing. I forget the technical details of it, but there's something akin to mad cow's disease you can get from eating parts associated with the nervous system.

>> No.8717597

...So, cannibalism = bad. I've learned something new today.

>> No.8717607

Prion diseases. Infectious proteins (which sounds weird, but it's true and horrifying). Entirely incurable and 100% fatal.

Moral of the story is, don't eat peoples' brains or yours will turn into a sponge.

>> No.8717619

>I forget the technical details of it, but there's something akin to mad cow's disease you can get from eating parts associated with the nervous system.
Here you go

>> No.8717625

For the n-th time, guys, Lunarians are humans. They just live on the moon. I'd make an example out of peoples of Africa, but someone from /pol/ would come and disagree and derail the thread.

Also, gods. Gods aren't youkai, too. Possibly some celestial creatures like dragons aren't either. That's it, though, everything else magical is. Even fairly specific species like ghosts are called youkai. Just a silly classification, really.

>> No.8717633

The human body is engineered to preserve the species. It's a security mechanism so we don't eat each other. There are psychological measures in place too.

>> No.8717634

are faeries youkai?

>> No.8717640

Remilia Koroshi

>> No.8717668

Akyuu calls them youkai, at least.

>> No.8717671

Read CiLR chapter 3, where it states that the first Lunarians left Earth at a time when life was first originating from the seas. Logic dictates that humans did not exist back then, so the Lunarians wouldn't be human.

The ones in Gensokyo are currently living as humans. That does not mean they are human. Even Akyuu states that, while they say they are human, she is suspicious of it.

But as far as gods go. Kami are pretty much divine spirits. If you look into Shinto, that's what you'll see. And, PMiSS backs this up by putting in a whole article on the "eight million gods" which are spirits that exist throughout all nature. Most of the kami aren't anything special. Just look at Minoriko for example. However, there are also those like Izanagi and Amaterasu who are just absurdly powerful to the point where humans probably can't fully comprehend it.

>> No.8717709

Hope they're full and want to try out a spell, then tell them "I want to be the demon-girl."

>> No.8717708 [DELETED] 

>it states that the first Lunarians left Earth at a time when life was first originating from the seas

No, it does not. What made you think it does?

>> No.8717716

>it states that the first Lunarians left Earth at a time when life was first originating from the seas

No, it does not. What made you think it does?

And who says gods are special? They're just different from youkai. Consult CoLA for an extensive description of the peculiarities of gods' existence.

>> No.8717723


Shintoism did. Fuck you.

>> No.8717741

"The life that arose from the seas in the very beginning staked its continued existence in a long battle, and its conclusion, the ocean was defiled, and only the winners set out onto the land, which then knew no impurity.
On land, the epic battle for survival unfolded once more. Some creatures became strong and fed on the weak. Some increased their numbers and were able to leave successors after being eaten. There were even those who cast aside the earth and sought a pure world in the sky. There were even those few who had no competition but lost their ability to adapt and went died off. Some even gave up on the earth and returned to the sea. There were very few victors, and most were destroyed in the battle, becoming extinct.
The history of life is a history of conflict. And winners dictate how history is recorded. The Earth is a world of impurity because it is this sort of blood-stained world. Living things tend to live on forever, but the impurity stole away their longevity. It was a world of the short-lived.
Today, Earth has become a place where almost nothing can live for more than a hundred years.
However, there was a sage who realized that the impurity was stealing life from all living things. It is said that while watching the full moon hanging in the sky over the ocean, this sage became determined to free themselves from the impure Earth."

If you know anything about how long it took humans to evolve from other animals, you would understand that it was long after impurity had completely corrupted the surface of the earth.

>> No.8717779

Let me ask again, where does it say that "first Lunarians left Earth at a time when life was first originating from the seas"? Hint: It doesn't.

>> No.8717785
File: 658 KB, 1600x1200, hidden chinese ripoff(3).png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Is that noise of place surrounding Yuyuko house?

>> No.8717813

Yes, life first moved to the land, and another battle for survival began. And that's when they moved.

However, my point still stands that humans wouldn't have been around then. If they had waited until humans were around, these Lunarians themselves would have been corrupted by impurity.

And as far as evolution goes. All of the stuff about life starting in the seas and adapting in order to survive heavily points to it.

>> No.8717824

I remember my grandfather recommending that movie to me.

Not bad, not great.

>> No.8717850

Yuyuko was once human, and she's probably got a few reservations with just killing a human for no reason considering her past if I recall correctly.

However, Yukari is too much of a wildcard, especially if you're from the outside world, though I think she'd have the decency to do anything to you within sight of Yuyuko

>> No.8717869

No, life went to the land, then made it to the sky, species died, new species were born, and so on, and so on, and finally a sage realized that to escape the vicious cycle you need to run away to the pure moon.

If they weren't a part of the cycle, they wouldn't need to run away. And they wouldn't be the part of the cycle if they somehow existed way before life could create forms capable of at least minimal though processes.

>> No.8717870

>Youmu Konpaku
>Human friendship level: High

>Yuyuko Saigyouji
>Human friendship level: High

>Ran Yakumo
>Human friendship level: Normal

>Human friendship level: Normal

>Yukari Yakumo
>Human friendship level: Average

I think you only have Yukari to worry about, but...

>Strangely, this youkai rarely attacks humans.

There must be some reason she has it out for you.

>> No.8717877


she doesn't remember being human.

>> No.8717890

I would walk right over there and slap Yukari across the face. Her expression would be so priceless. But I wouldn't have time to enjoy it properly because next would be a mad dash for the exit. I'm not expecting to survive this though.

>> No.8717882

She still has reservations about killing people, its been said already.

>> No.8717923

Shit nigger, what are you trying to do? Break your hand?

>> No.8717927

So you believe that the first Lunarians evolved from animals? I'm afraid that this is pretty much impossible because that would mean that they inherited impurity from their parents.

There were other kinds of beings than animals on the earth at that time. The kami existed before intelligent life forms did. In fact, Izanagi and Izanami's myths essentially dictate that they existed before the continents were ever formed in the first place.

We also know that the sage and founder of the Lunar Capital was named Tsukuyomi, which is coincidentally the name of a certain very popular Shinto kami... I'm just putting two and two together here.

>> No.8717947

It's not like I would survive anyway. Maybe I can confuse them, or at least anger them before I die.

>> No.8717964

Hey lovebirds, back to almost getting eaten by Youkai.

>> No.8718004

>So you believe that the first Lunarians evolved from animals?

This is already implied by the fact that I believe they're humans.

>they inherited impurity

Where does it say that impurity is inheritable? It does not. It's pretty clearly some kind of outside force (outside of the single organism, not the life as a whole). Note the "Living things tend to live on forever" part.

I don't know about gods having existed before humans. I do know, however, that people's belief can turn human into a god. One of the examples of such a thing happening is in the very chapter you're quoting.

>> No.8718019

Yukari would open a portal and you would slap your own face.
And when you run away, she would use another portal and you would end up on the same place again and again.

>> No.8718026

►Plan A
Tell Yukari I'm a friend of either Reimu or Shiki and that this group probably wouldn't want to do anything harmful or lewd to me.

Offer to be a servant probably wouldn't work with Yukari since she already has Ran and Chen, might with Yuyuko though obviously Youmu can't be enough.

The bondage is pretty loose so I ask that if they wish my life I want it to be taken by Youmu, since i'm a normal human she's not going to go all out so probably a normal slash just as she rears back to bring it on my neck roll lifting my hands behind my back to free them first, she'll be shock and go for a second slash which i'll expect and be in position for it to free my feet/legs. Getting upset she'll probably go for a third at this point i'll blade grasp that shit, take it from her hands The rest will get ready now probably Chen and Ran next, Jump past Youmu, cut of Chen's head Ran will be too in shock to counterattack, Youmu will still be WTF at losing her blade and seeing me fell on of her comrades, Yuyuko is a problam as she probably and kill me instantly but I can see her attempting magic instead I mean I just killed someone so obviously it's time to get serious. She'll probably shoot a few balls no many it's a closed space she doesn't want collateral damage, dodge those expect the Yukari gap next jump over it and kick her in it. bust through the door and get the fuck out. They'll all be to busy WTFing to give chase. Find the nearest human village ask where Hakurei shrine is get the fuck out and head back to normal earth. the end

>> No.8718084

When you're trying to behead Chen you suddenly feel something pierce your chest from behind... Youmu has 2 swords. Your plan played out so well in you head, but in the end you couldn't take even one of your enemies. You die in shame...

>> No.8718088

Impurity must be inheritable in some way, otherwise you can't explain why:
"Today, Earth has become a place where almost nothing can live for more than a hundred years."
Merely as an example, let's take present day humans. The majority of them have not been involved in murders or anything of the sort. And despite that, they (usually) can't live for longer than 100 years. This is universal. Even if they manage to live past 100, they won't last for much longer. That's exactly how it is in today's world as well.

Where did they get that impurity from? I don't think it's possible that they started with a blank slate. Are you suggesting that there is some outside influence? What kind of influence would that be?

You could theorize that the world itself had become so thoroughly saturated with impurity that, simply by living in it, your lifespan will become limited. However, that amounts to the exact same thing, because that would mean that the Lunarian founders had to leave the earth before it began to corrupt them with impurity in the first place.

I may not be an expert on evolution, but it's not necessary to do much research to see that the first humans did not evolve until life had completely covered Earth.

>> No.8718110


Slight revision then I parry and knock away the second sword before going after Chen, now ever thing is just as planned

>> No.8718111


I don't know, did you somehow forget that Youmu is capable of speeds no /jp/sie could possibly perceive with their eyes? Or that none of the others are humans in the first place? Or that Yukari can easily find you even if you make it to the outside world?

>> No.8718130

What would be the absolute worst youkai to be caught by?

>> No.8718143


I explained that, i'm a human there wouldn't be a need for them to go all out, If you were a powerful being would you expend extra time/energy to kill something? that like putting a full baseball bat swing to kill a fly. No since i'm already at a disadvantage and human there's no reason ANY of that current party would use spell cards or anything abvoe basic lvl magic.

This is the weakness I expose in that plan to get out, i'm pretty sure if I made it back to the outside world Yukari would leave me alone, although she has the ability to reach it, it really seems like she doesn't go there often for whatever reasons

>> No.8718154

the worst 2hu

>> No.8718163

Shikieiki, she'd never stop lecturing you

>> No.8718169
File: 73 KB, 528x560, whathefuckdoyouthinkyou'redoing.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

My honor has been besmirched. I challenge them to a fight where the losing terms involve me becoming a servant to whomever accepts to duel me, and if I win I go free. In this manner, it's a win/win situation for me. More than likely one of them will be dimwitted enough to accept my terms of battle hastily.
I get to battle a touhou, the terms involve me staying alive to become a servant, I might feel one up, and when I do become a servant if I happen to lose (which is more than likely) it's a dream come true.

These are the kinds of situations I dream of. It's mostly just sleep paralysis and I see something in my room that looks alive, and that sparks a sense of KILL IT, in me.

>> No.8718181

One of the strongest Youkai and the lowest human friendship level.

>> No.8718188

>Earth has become a place where

Note how it clearly states it's the Earth's environment influencing the aging. I'm open to the possibility it's some kind of translation peculiarity, but as it stands, the meaning is unambiguous here.

>You could theorize that the world itself had become so thoroughly saturated with impurity that, simply by living in it, your lifespan will become limited.

Theorize is not the word. That's precisely what the CiRL chapter in question says.

>Lunarian founders had to leave the earth before it began to corrupt them with impurity

I fail to see the necessity here.

Note that while in the real world we don't live past 120 or so, Gensokyo is a different matter. Hermits, in particular, are said to be living for much, much longer, if you may recall. Yes, you can fight the impurity. It takes a lot of effort, but is possible. Obviously, it does not take much effort in a pure place like the Moon, though.

>> No.8718201

Keep calm
dont squirm to much or panic but dont do nothing either
"Uuggrhhh...Ahh...Gensokyo, is it? Yukari, you understand what im saying. The guy next to me. He have a name?"
Start with that and improvise. try to get out of your bonds semi subtly. Enough so its not blatant but they probably can notice. This should help keep it going. The longer you survive the longer you have to see the circumstances change and perhaps into some set where you come up with some kind of hair brained scheme to get your ass outta the fire.

>> No.8718221

I can't believe some of you faggots actually want to escape. Getting eaten alive by touhous is better than not being around touhous. It would be nice to live with them sure, but even being killed by lovely ladies like them beats anything else.

>> No.8718244

And then we have this faggot.

>> No.8718284

lets say you do get out. You run away FAST. Into the woods. Just out, out of here. running through the thickest brush you can find, anywhere to hide. After hours of straight tearing through woods and running you dont see the world anymore, just see ahead, to run, get away. You find yourself out of the brush, but you dont quite notice where you are. Youre pushing through many tall, slightly fuzzy stalks, before you crash into something-no-someone. You fall on the ground and suddenly youre legs are on fire from all the running. You cant move. You open your eyes to see a green haired woman smirking down upon you. The area around you is green stalks with a yellow/brown blur on the top. Out of the frying pan...

>> No.8718290

(What do you do NOW?)

>> No.8718297

Beg them for one last wish. To try on every hat in gensokyo. If they grant me this, I'd die happily.

I'm tempted to right more on this but I don't think anyone would be interested, or that it'd be any good.

>> No.8718400

Let the battle commence

>> No.8718405

wow, what a beta. with behavior like this you'd probably disgust them enough so that they would spare you, and then throw away somewhere outside the border.

>> No.8718420

"I fail to see the necessity here."

Because the reason they're leaving in the first place is to avoid being corrupted by impurity so that they can start a pure civilization on the moon. The guys on the moon make a big deal out of that stuff, to the point where any Lunarian who becomes corrupted by impurity is banished to Earth. There can be no impurity on the moon, and they even have those plants that react to impurity, allowing them to detect the presence of it easily. Are you saying that the founders themselves were banished to Earth? Or maybe they actually cleansed themselves of impurity after they got there?

Alright, I'll leave this be then, since I can't disprove your theory that the Lunarians were originally human. Though I find it a bit silly that a human was named Tsukuyomi. Maybe the ancient people were just weird like that.

I'm perfectly fine with the idea that impurity isn't inherited, by the way. I'm not arguing against that. It's just that my memory was blurry and so I ended up messing up my argument, I think.

Even so, while the Lunarians could be human in origin, that does not mean they have to be. My theory that they were kami still stands, unless you want to attempt to disprove it, which is fine by me.

Hmm, it's true that hermits are able to live longer by following rituals. I was thinking of examples where humans lived longer by becoming supernatural beings of some sort (Alice and Byakuren are cases of this), but I wonder if hermits also count as being supernatural? It could be said that the rituals they perform have supernatural effects, which allow them to surpass humans.

>> No.8718428


Depends, if she tries to threaten me I swear I'll burn down every sunflower in the field ( i'm only bluffing but it's either her lover of her 'babies' or her hatered towards humans ) pretty sure she'll allow me to escape for the former


>> No.8718438


Get dunked?

Thats really not the ideal place to face her, you're royally boned. no running allowed anymore.

I choose... Smile and give her a hug, then back away shyly The way I see it, I'm fucked once the hug happens, as she'll probably freak out, but on the off chance she doesn't and is confused, my awkward backing away will actually allow me an escape.

Its like a 60/40 but its the best chance I've got. Either Unless neither of those 2 happen and I end up raped, that third one doesn't seem as likely, though.

>> No.8718439

Lightly whimper and sob in an attempt to look and seem as pathetic as possible. Either they'll feel pity and free me, or they'll realize that my lame might rub off on them if they get to close.

>> No.8718442

But Yuuka has power over the flowers she can just magically make new flowers arise from the ashes.

>> No.8718461


True but doesn't mean she wants to sacrifice them in any situation. Obviously she's not going to risk a battle there once again i've got the upper hand.

>> No.8718466 [DELETED] 


>> No.8718484

Like you could burn them down. You're just a mere /jp/sie, Yuuka is infinitely more powerful than you. She won't let you go with just this. In fact, it'd make her way more likely to brutally kill you.

>> No.8718486

I cant think of any way to weasel ones way out of this so:
Go play the touhou game of your choice where you fight yuuka. Lunatic,no bombs, no continues, no lives. Basically handicap yourself as much as possible. Since your legs are damned gelatin and you are a human JUST entered gensokyo, by way of youkai dinner...well...You are not going to be very strong.

>> No.8718492

>Of your choice
scratch that. The hardest you currently have on your computer, in your opinion.

>> No.8718506

I bet you're completely wrong.

>> No.8718503

>talking in japanese
I bet those living in Gensoukyou don't even speak Jap.

>> No.8718514

or of course you COULD try this. Or something like it, try something to confuse her and assuming your will to live i strong enough to make muscle out of limp angel hair, you run the fuck away again. Probably only untill youre used to the strain enough to think at least semi straight again and engage :
but you MIGHT decide where you want to go. You have all gensokyo ahead of you if you escape yuuka. Id put my bets on a temporary safe place on the hakurei shrine.

>> No.8718519

>Speak Japanese, we're in Gensokyo.

>> No.8718521

they speak their own branch of Japanese, but a derivative of it. think latin to Italian, probably, in terms of difference

>> No.8718548

those delusions, you couldn't even touch any of them

Besides, you can't do anything lasting to them.

>> No.8718560

If you try, you end up eviscerated. Its like some 10 year old karate student going up against a master martial artist.

>> No.8718565

Im quoting

>> No.8718576

Likewise, I cannot really disprove your theory that they're not humans, especially given that they're modeled after gods and their origins are obscured by design. But well, it's Touhou, everyone should choose what he wants to believe in.

I would find it strange for the gods to be called "living things", though.

>> No.8718580

How does Youmu sleep at night knowing the only reason she isn't considered food to her master is because of some arbitrarily assigned value? Maybe they are keeping her around so they can have fresh food later.

Silly anon. That is why you would use a gun. Attacking Youmu is pointless though.

Youmu's human half may be human, but in the end that only means that the Youkai will have two dead humans to eat instead of one.

>> No.8718578

I stand tall, pull my trousers down, and yell "SUCK MY COCK, DUDE"

>> No.8718585

>because of some arbitrarily assigned value
The fuck does that even mean?

>> No.8718605

Where did you get this evil yuyuko impression from anyways.

and where the fuck did a gun come from, stop making shit up.

>> No.8718608

How can you not understand what he means with it? It's so simple.

>> No.8718621

>where did the gun come from
Sorry I just assumed that you were an American so you would have one on your person at all times.

>> No.8718629

Even if you did manage to have a gun it wouldn't do you a bit of good, good luck getting an arm out of the binds AND aim at ANYONE before the hand holding or reaching for said gun isn't rolling on the floor.

>> No.8718655

The OP mentioned the binds were lose, but neglected to state how loose.

It is also a shame we are /jp/sies, otherwise some of us might have training how to to tie and untie knots quickly. This would make getting out of the binds much easier.

>> No.8718690

Youkai appear to have a lifespan, even though they tend to be quite long-lived and apparently don't die from being cut into 5 different pieces. Kami probably eventually reach a point where they will die too, I think. If there is the presence of death, then there is the presence of life.

That's how it is in Touhou. If you surpass death, then you are in a state neither alive nor dead. That's what it means to be immortal.

However, if impurity is what causes death, then humans were not "alive" until they encountered it. If the Lunarian founders are humans that no longer have any impurity, that would mean that they aren't living beings.

This is Umineko-level bullshit justification. Even if the text allows for it, you wouldn't tie someone up so loosely that they can move well enough without even getting out of it, that defeats the whole point. And by the way, Americans don't always carry a gun on their person, not even close.

If it's finding a solution to a logic puzzle, this level of bullshit makes for a wonderful answer to the problem. However, if we apply it to reality, it's just ridiculous.

>> No.8718693

>evil yuyuko
There are restaurants that keep fish in tanks so they can kill them fresh when they need them. How is Yuyuko keeping Youmu around any different from this?

Obviously most humans would consider it wrong, but it is an issue of perspective. If the fish in the tank were sentient I'm sure it would see us as monsters, and yet we would eat the fish anyway.

>> No.8718730

"Half-ghost" isn't an arbitrarily assigned value in the first place. Moreover, even if she were only 1% ghost, it'd still mean she's not a regular human.
Even MORE than that, sufficiently powerful humans are obviously not seen as fodder for youkai (Reimu, Marisa, etc.)

Therefore, fuck you.

>> No.8718737

I seriously approve of how open-minded you are, Anon. I may not agree that Yuyuko is keeping Youmu around for that reason, but despite that, encountering someone like you amidst so many narrow-minded humans, is like a breath of fresh air.

>> No.8718736

>It is also a shame we are /jp/sies, otherwise some of us might have training how to to tie and untie knots quickly.
I'm sure at least some of us have training in such things.

Well, I can confirm at least one, at any rate.

>> No.8718752

Challenge them to a game of strip-poker. I'll end up with the fanciest frilly clothes to try out later.

>> No.8718762

Thats a terrible idea but I like your track of thinking

>> No.8718766

I don't see how it can be such a terrible idea.

>> No.8718774

>What do you do

Politely ask them not to eat me.

>> No.8718773

Strip poker. Explain to me how that is not a terrible idea to ask for.
But perhaps a gambling game or game of chance wouldnt be such a bad idea, if it werent based around varying levels of nudity

>> No.8718792

I will.

It'd at least give me a little more time to live. The youkai would probably accept it seeing as it's such a strange request coming from someone who just woke up restrained, in their presence.

As the game moved on, their personalities would get the better of them and they'd get mad at each other over (mostly) baseless suspicions of cheating. If things went wrong I'd witness another incident and I'd have the best seat in the house to watch some cool fights. If things went smooth they'd all get naked and a lesbian orgy would ensue as I marvel over my newly acquired loot.

Yes, I'm arrogant enough to think I can win.

>> No.8718799

Well if they've already tied you then SM all the time until you're dead/abandoned.
And you probably will only be touched by Ran, Chen or Youmu. Damn hags be laughing.

Begging only excites them more, so I'd shut up and sing some Monty Python. Like

>> No.8718819
File: 328 KB, 533x800, 1325304681998.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Eh, I doubt Yuuka would just kill you for no reason.

>> No.8718850


I remember a human Aya interviewed(?) who ran the fuck away from Yuuka or her Sunflower field. All humans are genuinely scared of the place.

>> No.8718870

This is really a case of "you can't disprove so its a possibility" despite its not even the point of the thread, and there is no real indicator that Yuyuko would be like that.

>> No.8718883
File: 97 KB, 707x506, 1328840389443.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

I'd be more scared of her lake of human blood, to be honest.

But I still wouldn't run away. I think Yuuka's just misunderstood.

>> No.8718893

Aren't humans just generally wary of youkai? and if Yuuka has any sort of notoriety as a powerful youkai, its reasonable to be on edge if you encounter her.

>> No.8718915
File: 102 KB, 400x1201, Chen the Youkai.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]


>> No.8718929

then you can take your chances and smile warmly but worriedly up at her, your lungs and heart and legs feeling like theyll all just burst. And then see what happens. Good luck /jp/. good luck.

>> No.8718935

Lets assume this:
happened and you got away narrowly during a dispute over cheating.
Oh boy, I love it when things like this shape up into actual stories

>> No.8718963

Go away youkai, your kind is not welcome here.

>> No.8718965

I'm assuming it happened. Now what?

>> No.8718981

I think with arbitrarily assigned value, he means how Youmu is Yuyuko's servant. If she wasn't she'd be just another (half-)human for Yuyuko to eat.

>> No.8718985

oh, nothing more really, thats just how you got away.
lets also say you got away with rans hat. and chens pantsu~

>> No.8718986

Wear ran's hat as pantsu, wear chen's pantsu as hat.

>> No.8718989

That's not canon Chen. That's the fanon Chen. They're very different, you know.

>> No.8718987

I'd get my story out. I'd come to /jp/ and tell everyone about it. Then I'd post myself wearin nothing but Chen's panties and Ran's hat in case I need to prove my statements.

>> No.8718992

explain to yuuka why youre wearing a cat youkais panties as a hat
if you survive that:explain to ran the smell on her hat, and the poorly patched holes in its ears.
Your move, softy.

>> No.8718999

Pshh, like I'd return Ran's hat to her. She can make a new one.

As for the panties-as-hat, it should be obvious.

>> No.8719004

Would they really want to eat a /jp/er?

Most of us haven't had showers for days. Some for weeks, if not months.

I wonder how often Touhous bathe.

>> No.8719009

Right, then.
You dont understand gensokyan japanese so you have two choices with yuuka.
or danmaku with all your might.

>> No.8719012

we have discussed how filthy ran is many a time, much to my and her dismay. she is PROBABLY dirtier than you, /jp/

>> No.8719023

I wonder if Youmu were to die in battle if Yuyuko would actually mourn her passing, or if there would be a sense of irritation that the servant would no longer able able to perform its duties mixed with thoughts of, "at least I know what I'm having for dinner tonight."

I bet Yukari thinks of Reimu as a real pain in the ass. After all, Reimu is the lunch that fought back and got away.

When lobsters are boiled, there is a reason their claws are bound.

>> No.8719029 [DELETED] 

Yuuka might know english.

>> No.8719035

What would you even say to her?
Youre wearing chens panties on your head and you just stepped on some of her flowers probably.

>> No.8719039

I would say danmaku but I'm not exactly in the right condition to do that effectively, so I'll go with >>8718438

Might even be worth it, y'know?

>> No.8719052

doesnt work? Youre dead. Deader than that poor bastard who was next to you, and it will be more painful too.
But this isnt /tg/ so we cant roll dice for the chance on that scenario, so lets say you live, mustering all your might to dash out of her field in her confusion.
So. You have to try your best to recall maps of gensokyo you saw on /jp/, but you can go anywhere now, in theory. Id highly recommend hakurei shrine myself.

>> No.8719048

I came here to laugh at you.

Alternatively, offer her the hat and watch as the Yakumo house rushes towards the scene and concludes she stole Chen's hat, ensuing in a fight that allows me to escape yet again!

>> No.8719057
File: 54 KB, 500x514, 1322777457423.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Yuuka might know english. She has lived for quite some time (let's not call her old) and she is quite powerful. I'm sure in that huge mansion of hers she has some English books. She dresses in a European manner and has a European style mansion. Might be possible.

But let's go with the option of smiling warmly and hugging her.
What happens next in our valiant escape?

>> No.8719063

Hell. this works alot better as an explanation. good job anon.
You stand on the edge of the field, now. Go anywhere.

>> No.8719066
File: 119 KB, 946x485, AMERICA.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]


>> No.8719064

That makes sense; Reimu's fairly neutral-minded. Barring the human village, it'd probably be the best, and it's certainly more interesting than that.

>> No.8719070
File: 771 KB, 1612x1212, map.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>not having a map of Gensokyo on you at all times
Alright, well let's see here...

We seemed to have just escaped Youkai Forest and tumbled into Yuuka's flowerfield. According to this map, if we just go South we should be able to find the human village.

>> No.8719072

I'm actually enjoying this a lot. Reminds me of one of those point and click games of old.

>> No.8719077

I choose to go to the scarlet devil mansion.

>> No.8719084

Oh boy. well the human village would be boring so its reimus place or scarlet devil mansion.ill flip a coin for this. heads its the mansion, tails we see raymoo.

>> No.8719080
File: 1.49 MB, 405x240, 1288294270149.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>Chen's hat

I thought we took her underwear.

>> No.8719081

Uh, you think that's a good idea?

>> No.8719082

But there isn't a canonical map of Gensokyo...

>> No.8719086


Apparently someone made a hat of her panties.

>> No.8719088

I think we should go to Nameless Hill
Seems like a pretty legit place.

>> No.8719096

Hey, Ran did it first. Ain't my fault.

>> No.8719097
File: 229 KB, 1600x1200, 1288294402839.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

What kind of quest is this if we gave away Chen's bloomers?
We should have given Ran's hat.

>> No.8719106

Tails. You arrive in the hakurei shrine, and reimu walks out. she seems grumpy, but she eyes you expectantly. her eyes dart occasionally to your pockets. a yukkuri reimu comes out and starts flapping it around you saying some stuff in gensokyan including but not limited to their well known catchphrase.

>> No.8719112

Try to fit in. Attempt Gensokyan dialogue.

>> No.8719113

Toki wo tomare.


>> No.8719120

Okay, fine! Instead of going to the scarlet devil mansion I'll go to Ran's place instead and steal a whole drawer's worth of chen's panties to make up for it. Also steal a cute dress because save for ran's hat-turned-panties I'm apparently wearing nothing else.

Empty my pockets as a sign of having no money with me. This works, I did it with a deaf guy collecting donations for a recreational center.

I am unworthy of /jp/. I go outside.

>> No.8719116

Kill Yukkuri

>> No.8719130

I'd rather go to the Moriya shrine and start worshiping the three goddesses there. From what I hear they are looking for followers so they would be fairly welcoming.

>> No.8719128

You speak a barely functional broken dialect. You end up asking for a toilet by accident, as she grabs you by your wrist and drags you inside, leading you to the compost-sawdust based crapper. The yukkuri is laughing at your broken speech the whole time.

>> No.8719131

[ ] ignore yukkuri
[x] punt yukkuri

>> No.8719137

the thought passes and sticks in your mind, but youd rather deal with your buisness here first.
What are we gonna do on the toilet?

>> No.8719145
File: 1.69 MB, 2542x1150, abd322fe39ddfe17425da2fbd342a785.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Challenge one of the masters to a game of chess. Yeah I know Yukari has a super computer mind but what else could I beat her at that I could pull off? Computer games? Maybe rock paper scissors? She'd better not cheat some how.

>> No.8719143

the yukkuri is smacked against a wall out of the bathroom and splatters in a gorey mess of tears and bean paste against the wall outside. reimu sighs and slaps you, and smacks the door to the bathroom.

>> No.8719147

> Put on cute dress that you stole earlier
>Eat Yukkuri as you are probably starving by now

>> No.8719153

all you have right now is your pants, and rans hat which you wear as pantsu. plus some sandals you stole on your way out.

>> No.8719155

Pick rock, always pick rock.

Otherwise you could go for the most superfantabulous suspenseful cointoss of all time. As long as she doesn't cheat you have a chance.

>> No.8719164
File: 146 KB, 199x200, 1310768684927.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

This is becoming too convoluted. There are two GM's for three different anons, mixing up all storylines.

>> No.8719165

No you fool, pick this

>> No.8719166

A game of sex. First one to get pregnant loses. Hehehe.

>> No.8719167

>smacks the door to the bathroom
What is she implying? I don't need to use the bathroom.

Scream gaijin words at the miko in confusion. See if she has any extra bows we can wear. Our quest should be to assemble the prettiest outfit in all of Gensokyo.

>> No.8719172

you sneak out and eat the paste of the yukkuri off the wall with the dough hair and other things. the marisa down the hall is bawling its eyes out watching you. You go back inside and damn, that bean paste runs right through you! You step outside.
[]see reimu?
[]look around the shrine?
[]Torture yukkuri(reimu might not be happy with you for this, even if she doesnt care at all about the yukkuri, youve made a mess of her shrine for your sadistic pleasure)

>> No.8719177

You tried to speak gensokyan and ended up demanding a toilet.
she led you to one and is angry at you for the yukkuri thing to top it.
now read:

>> No.8719182

[x] see Reimu

>> No.8719188

You go into the next room when you finish, but reimus not there. you see her outline outside the window, and it sounds like shes shouting
[]see whats up
[]replace cat youkai pantsu with miko pantsu

>> No.8719193
File: 482 KB, 768x800, 1302901551217.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

They should all be canon and fit in. Everything considered. More fun this way.

Bad idea anon....
That's like challenging Death to a game of who has the most flesh on their bones.

Best be careful, least you end up pregnant yourself.

>> No.8719191

[x] put on miko pantsu as second layer of pantsu

>> No.8719198
File: 182 KB, 320x240, yugiyamiv4f1.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>arguing about something that doesn't exist

Where do I even begin...

>> No.8719201

youre in the middle of putting on reimus pantsu suddenly a wave of danmaku breaks through her shrine and outside you see chen and ran fighting her. she looks inside and looks at you like alot of things. mentally handicapped. a man with four heads. hentai desu. alot of things. she screams a blood curdling, ear wrenching "BAAAAKAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"
Youre feeling much more rested now, and she returns shortly to danmaku
[]try and help her to make up for it
[]raid more and run off

>> No.8719204

(not that anon)
Personally I'd love to be a mother. If Yukari made me into a woman (and impregnated me) just so she could beat me at a stupid game, that would be the best ever

>> No.8719206

[X] Steal ALL of her pantsu and run off

>> No.8719208

(the only reason youre alive is because shes more pissed at the youkai for ruining her shrine.)

>> No.8719214

Ill wait on 3 more replies on this and the majority wins. but expect a a shistorm, anon, if you do not choose your actions carefully

>> No.8719224

2 more*
3 total.

>> No.8719226

I'm goin' with this. Fuck da police.

>> No.8719230

ehhh...doesnt seem tobe any opposition.
You yank out the drawer and are carrying most of reimus bloomers now, plus a few sets of lingere.
You look back and shes looking horrified at you as you run off and you notice she looks overwhelmed
[]Give up half her pantsus and throw them at ran and chen to distract them

>> No.8719237
File: 47 KB, 250x223, 1318356967057.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]


Anyway, never give up the pantsu.
Quickly slip on the few pairs that burden you into a pantsu outfit and keep running, holding onto the remaining pairs for dear life.

>> No.8719240

Why does she leave the button in front of her titties unbuttoned? How lewd.

>> No.8719245

shes distracted as fuck by the fact that you STOLE ALL HER UNDERWEAR AND NOW ARE WEARING IT AS AN OUTFIT ANON

>> No.8719254

Well I guess.... but there isn't much I can do.
I'm willing to spare her one of my many pantsus if she needs an extra pair. A poor Miko that has no underwear could perhaps use an extra pair.

>> No.8719255

Am I the only one getting sick and tired of 3 samefags always flooding these threads with stale copypasta? Search the archive, we've had this EXACT same argument before with the EXACT same posts.

>> No.8719257

Post a link.

>> No.8719259

idk about you, but I wrote fresh pasta for this thread. This thread is the sauce.

>> No.8719260

This isn't grimsokyo, kid. Keep your mass sociopathy out of it.

>> No.8719263

You throw a pair of raymoos bloomers upon rans head. You then pull down your pants and show her youre wearing her hat as pantsu in an impulse move. then you run like a madman. Judging from the sounds of it reimu got the upper hand after that, but that probably doesnt make you even for stealing all her damn underwear.
Where do you go?(youre wearing an outfit made of bloomers, mind you, you look eccentric to say the least)

>> No.8719267

An outfit made up of frilly bloomers would fit right into Gensokyo.
I bet I could call myself a God and start up my own shrine.

>> No.8719271

A girl in the human village walks by.
A group. You make out, "Eeehhh, hentai desu"
You feel ashamed and move on.

>> No.8719276

[x] Become death, destroyer of worlds.

>> No.8719282

You set off for scarlet devil mansion. You run into a yukkuri alice raping a reimu on the trail. do you react?

>> No.8719288

Youkai eat humans. A Youkai as whimsical as Yuyuko probably thinks it quite novel to have a trained human around to take care of chores, but the chores are not so arduous that doing them herself would be troubling.

If you had a chicken that you trained to clean the floors, would you be sad if it died? On the other hand, if you were starving would you continue to feed this chicken?

>> No.8719291

I devour them both and rub their bean paste over my bloomer-covered body.

>> No.8719300

you approach china at the gate with a filthy stained bloomer outfit with half of a half living yukkuri reimu twitching and softly crying slung over your shoulder. What do you do?

>> No.8719307

Except Yuyuko isn't a youkai, and there is no evidence that she's of the type you describe.

>> No.8719329

Ghosts are youkai, Anon.

And we also have no evidence that she isn't that way.

>> No.8719334

she looks at you strangely. alot of people have been doing that. She seems to have NO idea what to make of you, and doesnt say anything, just looks at you like a man in an outfit made of loosly tied together bloomers and lingere covered in bean paste with a twitching yukkuri on his shoulder.

>> No.8719343

Except the numerous instances of her light-hearted and kind nature?

Its also worth mentioning that not all youkai are evil or malicious.

>> No.8719345

Eating meat makes you evil and malicious?

>> No.8719357

You aren't going to get anywhere with this you know, no one's going to take your ridiculous depiction.

>> No.8719355

Eh... She does look after Youmu, but not in the way that a mother or friend would, as far as I can tell (I'm just going off of SSiB and CiLR here).

>> No.8719356

ITT: There is no evidence against(or in favor of) my theory so there is no way you can prove it wrong!

Keep whining about secondaries while being secondaries and grimdarkfags yourselves, /jp/

>> No.8719361

g-guys? Magical girl pantsu quest? Cant we all get along?

>> No.8719392

so how would i get myself into this situation
say if i hypothetically actually wanted to get butchered and eaten by youkai
hypothetically of course

>> No.8719389

Why am I enjoying this thread so much

>> No.8719395

Why else would they allow the Human Villiage except to keep the hunting grounds well stocked?

If they really wanted to have humans for company instead of food, they would just open their border.

Except the Youkai must not really see us as people. They see us as animals to be eaten.

The meat from the outside world is full of all kinds of toxins. Not just mercury buildup, other toxins too, like the Thorazine you take every day. Top predators have to be careful what they eat, since a small change in toxicity at a low level affects the top levels greatly.

>> No.8719409

You keep assuming that youkai adhere completely to their bestial nature, rather than the fact that being separated from the increasingly logic based world humans were creating has allowed them to flourish in culture and spiritual strength.

Youkai interact with humans in non-detrimental ways all the time there, its only even the lower level youkai that have little intelligence that bother with meat. Its also stated that youkai that crave flesh go outside gensokyo to obtain it, they don't bother with the internal population.

>> No.8719411

You don't know what you are talking about as Youkai aren't allowed to eat humans from the Human Village but can freely eat outsiders.

If they wanted to eat humans, they WOULD open the border.

>> No.8719424

and once the military found out about this, the gensokyo would be no more and all youkai exterminated, possibly with few exceptions like yukari or yuyuko hiding away from the evil concept-denying weaponry of the modern, anti-magic, no-faith world they had to seal themselves off from to survive centuries ago.

>> No.8719429

an open border with the real world would surely end with gensokyo facing a human military invasion and the youkai being genocided

>> No.8719436

Because all humans from the village stay in the village right?

As explained in the previous post, humans from the outside world would be awful to eat in large numbers. Watch a video on the effects of krokodil and then consider if even the most savage of youkai would consider eating that.

Utsuho, a mere pet in Gensokyo could easily handle everything today's military has to offer.

>> No.8719435


But that map is wrong.

>> No.8719440

Instances of youkai stealing humans is always cases of MIA people, getting lost in the woods, going off to do the trendy thing in aokigahara, things that aren't noticed.

>> No.8719437


Human world is nothing. Moon bitches would shit on it faster than Aya taking a photo.

>> No.8719442

>Utsuho, a mere pet in Gensokyo could easily handle everything today's military has to offer.
But that's wrong. One MAN, with one gun and 144 bullets could kill every single touhou if he had decent aim. The only reason youkai seem powerful is because you're playing as a girl.

>> No.8719446
File: 12 KB, 500x400, NASA.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Bullshit, we kicked their ass and are already colonizing the moon.

>> No.8719456

Remelia has power over fate. That man lost before he ever drew his weapon.

Or perhaps Remelia's servant could utilize her abilities...

>> No.8719454

Two men wiped the moon clean in 1960's. Imagine what a few more men could do today...

>> No.8719476

In gensokyo, a legendary weapon like a desert eagle never needs to be reloaded, and always hits its target. Think Gae Bolge. Not even power over fate can stop it.

You could probably shoot a bullet in the air aiming at nothing, but that bullet is destined to kill a touhou. Whether they just flew by, or the bullet travels for miles to drift into the skull of its target. It's inevitable. Power of the mighty Phallus by itself would have been enough, but with a gun like that, Gensokyo never stood a chance.

>> No.8719492

why are you posting this, talking about mass murdering the poor girls
this is all awful and you should feel bad for posting it

>> No.8719498

Anything beyond isolated cases of people being spirited away/fallling in is not to be taken seriously.

>> No.8719505

Except it isn't some legendary .50 "The Desert Eagle" handgun. The man came from the outside world. His gun was made in a factory. There is nothing magical or special about it.

You speak of men as if they are something special. You forget of course, that Gensokyo has men as well (if memory serves it was stated in one of the interviews). They aren't mentioned because they are powerless.

>> No.8719510

its still awful and I still think youre awful.

>> No.8719520

Those are sissy men of Gensokyo, who cares about them. The average Earth male would be on par with an average female Youkai. Similarly, an average Earth Female would be on the level of Gensokyo men. The reason Gensokyo is so tiny, is because that's as much space that could be open for a female dominated society. It just wouldn't work on the large scale.

>> No.8719517

They aren't powerless, they are descended from the heros of old that came to fight off the evil youkai and stayed when it was sealed off, and instead of developing technology, they focus on spiritual depth/power.

You can't call them powerless, but they aren't immensely notable, not to mention they're male and tend to be hatless.

>> No.8719526

what in gods name are you talking about

>> No.8719532

So the 'soak really IS like The Zone, except instead of your ovaries getting twisted into mutant making machines they give you magic powers?

>> No.8719557

thread ruined
go home everybody

>> No.8719560

ITT, secondaries arguing about crap that can never be proven since it doesn't exist.

>> No.8719565
File: 170 KB, 453x435, GuwNr.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

I have no idea what's going on

>> No.8719608
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The world has gone mad, best not take it with any weight, life is too short to worry.

>> No.8719627

>life is too short to worry
and it is even shorter when you are destined to be a Youkai's dinner.

>> No.8719630

halfway through it became a quest thread
that turned into pantsu quest
then there started arguing about grimsokyo
that ended with a horrible man posting about genocide-ing 2hus and a heaping spoon of misogyny-salt to that steak.
now everyone's looking around the rubble wondering what in the fuck just happened.

>> No.8719635
File: 32 KB, 256x300, 24604830.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Unlikely, considering I live in the outside world and would be missed by immediate family.

and that's no reason to worry anyways.

>> No.8719657
File: 118 KB, 850x727, ay9e3.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

It's a shame, I was enjoying the quest until it devolved into yukkuri abuse and hoarding pantsu.

Posting the scariest youkai in an attempt to compensate.

>> No.8719680

I tried to steer it away from pantsu hoarding
I gave opportunity

>> No.8719697

as well I was hoping those 2 yukkuris on the trail would end in /jp/ saving reimu from alice and getting a cute gratefull yukkuri pet.
As well I was hoping /jp/ would try danmaku with reimu instead of running away with her pantsu.

>> No.8719717

Going toe to toe with Reimu in her land with her rules?

and this is /jp/, its well within reason that bloomer nabbing is a common choice

>> No.8719739

No, alongside reimu.
Fighting alongside reimu against ran and chen.

>> No.8719751

Can a normal human even use danmaku?

>> No.8719771

For what reason would Reimu have to fight Ran/Chen?

>> No.8719784

Because they were chasing you after you fled to the Hakurei Shrine with Chen's pantsu. Or something.

>> No.8719835

Yes and reimu ended up fighting them and you had the option to take her pantsu or fight with her

>> No.8719858

And rans hat!

>> No.8719892

What the fuck is going on here.

You guys think mere outside world humans have that much power?

Pft, okay.

Vampires can run through the entire human village in an instant, meaning they can run faster than most of your bullets, and Flan only has to close her fist in order to destroy you.

Yuyuko can kill you with a thought. I don't even need to mention the fact that Youmu can supposedly move about something like a quarter of the speed of light during 200 Yojana.

And if you think you can shoot at Yukari, well, go ahead and try. Too bad things like distance and speed mean nothing to her. She doesn't even need to block if she doesn't want to, because a gap will carry anything she doesn't like into another dimension. And if you think she can't react in time, then your autism is off the charts because hey, she's the only Phantasm boss in the entire series.

And Ran is almost as powerful as she is.

Kaguya can likewise move in a single instant. She can also mess with other timelines, and make it so things can't be changed (unbreakable shields, anyone?). Of course, that's all from PMiSS... And, we don't really know what Eirin is capable of. Because, despite being generally regarded as the more difficult final boss if IN, her official profile states that she was definitely holding back out of respect for Kaguya.

>> No.8719897

And that's without mentioning the fucking Yama, and Suwako and her curse gods, and Kanako who is canonically Takeminakata (according to Yukari in SSiB), and Tenshi who can create earthquakes and manipulate the essence of the spirit (temperament) and possesses an extremely durable body that probably wouldn't even take much damage from bullets (because of the peaches from Heaven that she ate all the time), and the Oni who are so physically strong and durable that they don't even need magic to kick your ass but they have an incomprehensible amount of magic power anyway...

And Koishi who you can't even notice, so do you really think you can aim at her? She can modify your subconscious, so she can control you without you even realizing you're being controlled. She can easily spark some disorder and chaos in your pitiful army and watch as it tears itself apart. And that's without her even having to get her hands dirty.

And please don't come up with shit like "our weapons have supernatural powers" or whatever because, no. You're humans. You don't get anything like that. You have your weapons, and your skill, and your comrades, and that's all you've got.

Good luck, buddy. You're gonna need it.

>> No.8719935

please ;_;

>> No.8720893
File: 429 KB, 1600x1200, e95be4e24b7d707e5af822ef51b733f0.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

I'd much rather see this...

>> No.8721677

That's why you challenge them to a game of strip poker and pit them against each other instead of directly fighting them.

>> No.8721828

Except if the border were opened, Gensokyo would disappear because logic and common sense would have to be applied there.

Christ, read up before you speak your ignorant mouths. There's a reason the youkai NEED the Hakurei border.

>> No.8723328

I think you need to read up before you open your ignorant mouth, its not that youkai NEED fantasy, its that the outside world doesn't WANT fantasy.

>> No.8723498

youkai need faith to exist though.

they escaped from all over the world to the small, isolated gensokyo because it was the only place on earth that still provided them enough faith in magic for them to survive.

>> No.8723515

That's still wrong, its gods that need faith to live, youkai merely thrive on it or for some types, thrive on fear.

>> No.8723577

faith was what created them too though.

for example, if nobody believed in vampires in the middle ages or before, there would be no vampire lore, and so vampires wouldn't exist. if nobody believed in the magic, it wouldn't exist.

that would form an invincible shield against anything magical, so spells, magicians, youkai, gods, faeries etc.

umineko called it the endless nine, a perfect, impenetrable anti fantasy shield. don't think touhou has a special name for that though, especially since it always deals with the gensokyo residents who have rejected technology and science in favor of superstitions and fantasy.

>> No.8723592

Remilia and Mamizou are 2 examples that defy your assumption.

>> No.8723595

and yet remilia also had to evacuate to gensokyo when the belief in vampires dwindled to nothing in the outside world.

>> No.8723615

There was never a stated reason as to why Remilia came to Gensokyo, so assuming its because of decreasing notoriety of vampires in the outside world is shaky, and there's still Mamizou.

Also, Gensokyo was sealed off by the outside world's population, as they had no need of youkai in their world.

>> No.8724083

Funny how you call it an invincible shield and make it sound so great, when it's really just another way of saying how amazingly narrow-minded and incompetent humans are.

But yes. I concede to your point. While it may not mean that magic is entirely useless against humans, it probably does weaken it.

>Also, Gensokyo was sealed off by the outside world's population, as they had no need of youkai in their world.

I'd like to point out that the Gensokyo Record is not a good source of information. If you don't believe me:

>> No.8724104

Some information is better than none, and there is less to prove your argument.