/jp/ - Otaku Culture

[Anonymous No.]

You finally decide to end your worthless life and create a portal to Gensokyo. However, after you take your life you begin to descend to Hell due to your sinful and Hedonistic lifestyle.

Upon arrival to hell you are brought before the Great Yama herself and asked why you deserve not to suffer eternally in Hell.

What is your response?

[Anonymous No.]

I'm pretty self-deprecating and I don't tend to think ahead, so I'd probably just be like, "Throw me in there. I don't care."
Then the fire and brimstone stuff would kick in and I'd probably care.

[Anonymous No.]

Consensual Sex in the Missionary Position her.

[Anonymous No.]

Argue that though I'm dead, I have not yet outlived my usefullness.

Sure, should I succeed with this, I'd be worked harder than I ever was in life, but that stuff isn't so important in Gensokyo, and the whole esacping eternal damnation thing, that too.

[Anonymous No.]

I ask her various lateral thinking riddles because it feels like the sort of thing to do in that situation.

[Anonymous No.]

I killed myself so that I could awaken in a superior plane of existence, so I'd tell her that now that I've managed to do it I'll live to clear all my past sins. She can see my intentions. so she'd see I'm not lying.

[Anonymous No.]

Genuinely repent of my sins and cleanse myself of them.

[Anonymous No.]

ask her why the HELL I deserve to be there just because I do what I want

[naitoknaito No.]

Dear Eiki, I don't mind going to hell as I don't mind burning for all eternity due to my sins in life but please, please, please, I don't want to burn alone.

[Anonymous No.]

>>8481244
I'm sure as hell not going to burn together with you.

[Anonymous No.]

An infinite punishment is infinitely unjust for a finite crime, no matter how severe.

[Anonymous No.]

''Can I take /jp/'s whole population with me? I want to be with them for all eternity.''

[wtH !!geIKdOh6/lP No.]

HELLo Yama, your buddy wtH DESU

yoroshiku onegaishimasu~~~

[Anonymous No.]

WHAT IS LOVE, BABY DON'T HURT ME

DON'T HURT ME, NO MORE

I'd keep singing, but at this point I must be already in hell.

[Anonymous No.]

>>8481268
Your individual sins may be finite but your sinful nature is unlimited in its perversion. Were you to live forever you would sin forever, so an eternal punishment is only fitting for someone like you who is currently doomed to live all your days in sin.

[「ロリあき」 No.]

I've sinned, so as a real man, I will take my punishment without begging for salvation or complaint.

Punish me, Yama.

[Anonymous No.]

SUCK MY COCK DUDE

[Anonymous No.]

I don't remember doing anything bad recently.

[Anonymous No.]

I INSIST to her that I spend all eternity in hell as I've been a horrible human being.

[Anonymous No.]

Before you decide my punishment, I want to know exactly what is a sin, which actions can be classified as sinful, which is the punishment that applies to each sin, how do sins add, how does the punishment add up, and now that you're at it show me your credentials and explain me why must I be punished for something that's just relative to the observer.

[Anonymous No.]

>>8481309
that's the former hell though, you wouldn't get sent there.

[Anonymous No.]

>>8481309
Satori lives in old hell. It's other hell than you will arrive.

[Anonymous No.]

I dont know.
I dont know why I should be sent either.

[Anonymous No.]

>>8481315
>>8481322

Then whose spirits is it that Orin carries, if not the newly deceased?

[Anonymous No.]

>>8481365

He carries corpses, not spirits. Learn the difference.

[Anonymous No.]

>>8481365
Those are the spirits of the bodies she drags down to hell with her. She uses the bodies to fuel the fires, and turns the souls into evil spirits. Orin is probably why it's a good idea to bury bodies.

[Anonymous No.]

>>8481365

She carries corpses, not spirits. The spirits of those corpses turn into lone spirits. Learn the difference.

[Anonymous No.]

Fuck your hell Yama, have a taste of my heaven!!@
*WHIPS OUT DICK*

[Anonymous No.]

But it's my first day.

[Anonymous No.]

Because I am a pure virgin. Virgins dont go to hell.

[Anonymous No.]

>>8481380
She'd just dig them back up again anyway.

[Anonymous No.]

hi im new!!!!!!! *holds up spork* my name is katy but u can call me t3h PeNgU1N oF d00m!!!!!!!! lol...as u can see im very random!!!! thats why i came here, 2 meet random ppl like me ^_^... im 13 years old (im mature 4 my age tho!!) i like 2 watch invader zim w/ my girlfreind (im bi if u dont like it deal w/it) its our favorite tv show!!! bcuz its SOOOO random!!!! shes random 2 of course but i want 2 meet more random ppl =) like they say the more the merrier!!!! lol...neways i hope 2 make alot of freinds here so give me lots of commentses!!!!
DOOOOOMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <--- me bein random again ^_^ hehe...toodles!!!!!
love and waffles, *~t3h PeNgU1N oF d00m~*

[Anonymous No.]

>>8481403
Nice tactic, you'd definitely be kicked out of hell for that :3

[Anonymous No.]

>>8481120
>Upon arrival to hell you are brought before the Great Yama herself and asked why you deserve not to suffer eternally in Hell.

Typical over-privileged 1%er; she doesn't know how to perform her own job. She's the Yama, she should _know_ why I do or do not deserve to suffer eternally in Hell.

Fuck it, I'm not telling her a damn thing. She can spend a quantum of exertion and figure it out for herself. I'm not doing her job for her.

[Anonymous No.]

If I go to hell, I'm taking you with me Yamaxanadu.

Then I'll hug her.