/jp/ - Otaku Culture

[Anonymous No.]

>Finally go to bed after 30 straight hours of Rune Factory 4
>Realize I left my door unlocked but I'm too tired to get up and lock it
>Start having a nightmare where a demon is ripping my dick off
>Suddenly a spear pierces my heart
>I feel it in real life
>Wake up in a blazing inferno of darkness, fire, and chains
>The Prince of Darkness himself turns to me and condemns my soul to eternal damnation for the sin of homosexuality
>Tell him he's wrong because I've never committed a homosexual act in my life
>He pulls down a projector and plays a video from just before I succumbed to death.
>Some vile creature is atop me in my bed with its foul mouth wrapped around my dick, obliterating it beyond recognition
>As I watch my soul fade from my earthly vessel, the sickly beast turns its head to the celestial camera and whispers a single sentence
>"Who are you quoting?"

JAYPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

[Anonymous No.]

>>8126579
>Start having a nightmare where a demon is ripping my dick off
Fucking sleep paralysis!

[Anonymous No.]

Oh hey, it's the shitty greentext story I wrote two weeks ago.

Rude sage.

[Anonymous No.]

>walk into Gamestop
>ask for a copy of Atelier Totori
>"What?"
>spaghetti slowly drips from my pockets
>oh god not again
>face gets red
>"Please give me a copy of Atelier Totori right now."
>"I don't know what that is. What platform is it on?"
>struggling to contain my embarrassment
>clenching asscheeks together to hold in my shit
>meanwhile spaghetti is flowing out of my pockets
>voice reduced to a mumble
>"have money please alterlier toroti give money please game"
>"Are you ok?"
>shit breaches through my asscheeks
>propelled forward at 60mph
>crash through the Gamestop employee's counter
>he's holding on to me for dear life
>all the while spaghetti is flowing out of my pockets like fumes
>crash through the entire row of buildings in the strip mall, broken glass shards in my face
>yelling "ATELIER TOTORI PLEASE MONEY ATELIER GAMESTOP TOTORI"
>Gamestop employee is covered in shit and spaghetti
>my pocket rocket shows no signs of stopping
>he tilts me backwards
>the sheer force of my shit has reached 650mph, we are now propelling upwards
>the spaghetti and shit intertwines and falls down to earth in glorious yellow and brown streams as we head towards the stratosphere
>children below frolic in the mess falling from my anus
>the g-force is causing my asscheeks to flap vigorously and create a gale
>spaghetti and shit blowing through the air on the planet below
>3 miles upwards now
>Gamestop employee has died from lack of oxygen, his body falls to the surface below and is shredded by the force of my shit
>my transformation is almost complete
>as I leave the atmosphere my bear hands sprout and my tail grows, acting as a rudder
>steer myself across the cosmos with my gleaming shit and spaghetti trail

[⑨Liberty-kun⑨ !yFBUixGIig No.]

[Anonymous No.]

>>8126594
>>8126594