/jp/ - Otaku Culture

[Anonymous No.]

While I was on the bus, I thought of a plot for a story I think would be really cool. I just want to share my idea and see the general reception. I never really structured a stories plot before, so bear with me. This doesnt tend to follow ZUNs canon.
Remilia finds a way to turn youkai and humans into vampires(maybe some backstory on why they couldnt) and becomes obsessed with pursuing a "master race" ideology (her rationale can come from how youkai and humans are destroying gensokyo with their reckless conflict or something). She would pursue this, only telling Flandre and planning to turn everyone in the Mansion into vampires and act as a staging point to spread into the world. There could be some conflict that surface with Remilias sudden withdrawal from Mansion affairs. When someone (maybe Sakuya) discovers what shes planning, theres a lot of room for writing here.

Since theres a lot of ruckus going on at the mansion, Reimu and Marisa go to investigate. But they end up being defeated and Marisa is captured and Reimu manages to escape. Marisa is tortured by Flandre (in her own, psychopathic way) and mentally/emotionally broken. She escapes (i have what I think is a really good sub-plot that explains this) and has PTSD and depression. No one available can help her cope, so they decide to embark in finding Mr Kirisame.

I'd like to write about how since Marisa suffers from Parental Abandonment, her kleptomania and domineering personality helped her cope. And since she was broken by being a prisoner, she no longer has anything to help her cope with both PTSD and parental abandonment. So it seems proper that finding her dad would be one of the only things to get her back to fighting spirits.

[Anonymous No.]

I have a great subplot for Mr. Kirisame. It involves him and Yukari cheating death in the past and on the run from Shikieiki Yamaxanadu and Komachi. Since life/death is a natural balance, and those 2 are duty-bound to preserve and enforce that balance, them cheating death would envoke Shikieikis wrath.

I also have an explanation on why Marisas parents were not involved in her life, but I wanted to just share the plot, not potential spoilers.

So, what do you guys think?

[Rozalin !!vPEaWM5chi6 No.]

I don't usually shoot down things that people like to think up.
But really.
Your idea sucks. A lot. Try again.

[Anonymous No.]

Thanks for wasting another minute of my life, but to be quite frank here.
It stinks

[Anonymous No.]

>>8094227

Why?

[Rozalin !!vPEaWM5chi6 No.]

>>8094230
I can't imagine the characters behaving like you describe. It doesn't fit, even in grimdark Gensokyo. It feels like Touhous were copy and pasted over some other names.

[Anonymous No.]

There's a site for fanfics OP, you should probably just go ask there, I'm sure they're more familiar with writing and reviewing.

[Anonymous No.]

>>8094233

I don't think its that far fetched. What other vampires are there except Remilia and Flandre? Flandre is a psychopathic destroyer, you'd think Remilia would feel rather lonely and outcasted (even if she has a lot of authority) for being 1 of the supposedly last 2 vampires. The idea of having more of "her kind" could make her really eager to pursue that idea.

I also don't see how Marisa is far fetched either, she does cope with kleptomania and parental abandonment does funny things to a kid, especally when they are all grown up.

[nght_of !kNGhTSucXc No.]

Simple and plain: Not Interesting enough.

It's easier to get people on with something comfortable, light and warmhearted than with those deep protagonist traumas that evolve in long monologues about how they are innerly and their problems.

Just write about Marisa hat being stolen and her epic crusade about recovering it, meeting other touhous and having downer adventures

[Anonymous No.]

>>8094252

You call my idea simple and plain but the idea of her hat being stolen and her adventure recovering her hat is not?

[Anonymous No.]

>>8094267
Your reading comprehension is lacking

[Anonymous No.]

Having very little basis in canon is fine as long as characters are still recognizable as characters or you offer an innovative and refreshing take on characters. Psychotic Scarlets have been done to death, so you have to either execute it expertly or offer some unique insight on the situation, which I don't see.

Having a character tortured resulting in PTSD and writing their adventures with psychological trauma is not something that people want to read, especially when they're looking for Touhou fiction and get something that bears very little resemblance.

Any plot can be pulled off with exquisite writing, but I doubt you can bring that to the table.

[Anonymous No.]

>>8094279

Good insight. It's safe to assume that Grimdark Touhou needs to be written really well to keep the characters inherent personality to be consistent with the world. I believe I do have the insight to create that but not the writing skill.

I know I have a good idea, I just need to figure out how to materialize it properly.

[Anonymous No.]

There's always something I've thought about:

With all these games the occurence of them were within a short period of time, as in maybe only a few years for the characters. I always have to think, "How well does the boundary hold Yukari keeping an eye on it..."

What if the barrier that separates Gensokyo from "this" world started to unravel, and people get pulled into Gensokyo, furthering the tear?

What if the real reason for it was perhaps a certain priestess, brought into Gensokyo, that caused it...with someone on the other side unwilling to let her go and move on?

What if this has happened before? An individual that seems so unnoticeable in abilities, yet stands out in Gensokyo for one reason...

don't just tldr me...please