How to continue a comfortable NEET existance

[Anonymous No.]

1. ) Attempt suicide many times (failing of course)
2. ) Make a believable story as to why you did it while in the mental hospital (and you WILL be hospitalized)
3. ) Get diagnosed with a "crippling" mental disease
4. ) Apply for disability, SSI, whatever it may be, apply for it.
5. ) Get dosh every month without having to do anything, and free healthcare to boot.
6. ) Play 2hu and browse /jp/ all you want for the rest of your life.

[Anonymous No.]

Get a job, NEET!

[Anonymous No.]

>>7639562
>(and you WILL be hospitalized)
Not if no one cares about you.

[Anonymous No.]

Failing suicide would be really embarrassing. I can't handle that.

[Anonymous No.]

PS:
Does not work in every country.

[Sudo !Tohsaka8ks No.]

You can just skip the first two steps, I did.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7639583

I got turned down by the SSI because I worked 2 weeks in 2009. They didn't even see the laundry list of mental problems and irregular heart-beat +chest pain.

[Sudo !Tohsaka8ks No.]

>>7639599
That sucks. I've never worked, so that probably helped me get approved so easily.

[BaconSandwitches !!8bHOkBDFpwN No.]

>>7639562

I'm not even trolling

That sounds like a good setup

[Anonymous No.]

>>7639571
This is what happened to me. No one even noticed.

[ZUN !barYV1VtIA No.]

Mental hospitals and insane asylums are like my fetish thanks to Silent Hill and One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest and such.

[「ロリあき」 No.]

Is there any way to get diagnosed with a crippling mental disorder without the suicide attempts? Let's assume I'm mentally healthy, but have a strong family history of mental illness....

[Anonymous No.]

LOADS OF EMONE

[Anonymous No.]

Fuck, I already told my doctor very clearly that I've never had suicidal thoughts, because I was too afraid to lie, and because, frankly, I'm a little proud that I've managed to keep myself above that level for so long.

[「ロリあき」 No.]

>>7639619
Loads? I only have an emone. Pic related.

[「ロリあき」 No.]

>>7639643
And... I fail at posting pics. Again.

[Anonymous No.]

But I get more money from being unemployed than from being retired.

Also my country requires a clinically accepted rehabilitation plan. Feels very bad man, even when I REALLY have suicidal thoughts every day, and if I were to lose my source of income, I would probably starve to death, instead of going to the breadline.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7639571
Just go to a hospital and tell them you are suicidal. But please don't say something stupid like "I swallowed a bunch of pills" unless you want to get your stomach pumped. Saying that your suicidal should be enough.

[Anonymous No.]

Hohoho, all the shit i'm going to tell this psychologist in a few days...

The neat part is none of it will be a lie.

[「ロリあき」 No.]

>>7639716
I can't even fake suicidal. I'm too smiley and laid back for it to ever be convincing.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7639615

>Insane monster girl loli doujin?

Fund it!

[Anonymous No.]

>>7639757
That doesn't matter. They won't say "Stop faking, get out of here." they have to take you in. What's important is getting it on paper. The people who hand out SSI will look at look at your medical history. The doctors aren't going to try and prove you are not suicidal but they will ask why a lot. The only way you can mess up is by admitting that you're after SSI and that the whole thing was a lie.