/jp/ - Otaku Culture

[Anonymous-chan No.]

H-Hey /jp/... Y-You know how much I love and appreciate you guise, so I made this audio record JUST for you...

http://vocaroo.com/?media=vjNrTwxOyQXHkyCoN

[Freezing !qSaya2MQ6o No.]

>>>/a/

[Anonymous-chan No.]

>>7625549
U... U mad, bra?

[Anonymous No.]

Sounds like a man using pitch modulator.

[Anonymous No.]

Get out. Get the fuck out.

[Freezing !qSaya2MQ6o No.]

>>7625554
Just gay

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous-chan No.]

>>7625558
Y-You should w-watch my favorite anime.. b-boku no pico bible black... totes...

[Anonymous No.]

I gather you are either a fat, white woman, or some sort of weird, black, tiny girl.

[Anonymous No.]

return to your precious /a/

[Anonymous-chan No.]

>>7625564
M-My penis will d-drill through the... heavens..

>>7625571
I-I'm not fat... I-I'm a really muscular black man... Y-You scared, yet... bra?"

[Anonymous No.]

why do you do this, /jp/?

[Anonymous-chan No.]

>>7625583
http://vocaroo.com/?media=vNBqFpwVksigqCSqF

[Anonymous No.]

>>7625583
and I was hoping that was one of those sly little transparency jobs, it was even .png

I feel let down

[Anonymous No.]

say "menchi is a douche and deserves to be unemployed" and you can stay.

otherwise i'm calling the cops.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7625588
autism

[Anonymous No.]

>>7625588
Dat nasally voice Hnnnnngh

[Anonymous-chan No.]

>>7625593
http://vocaroo.com/?media=vJQsT2WmSpRr1xZwy

[Anonymous-chan No.]

>>7625596
I-I'm not autistic.. I-I'm just.. s-socially awkward...

>>7625597
http://vocaroo.com/?media=vggLeDTwiW9apIfOT

[Anonymous-chan No.]

>>7625602
I-I'm ellergic to... f-faggots...

[Anonymous No.]

>>7625602

Say, "Oh King of GETs, your five inch cock is making my ice wings twitch by themselves!"

Do it.

[White Ren !YLuFFdRcFQ No.]

>>7625610
If she does this, I'm going to accelerator bomb every single thread of yours from now on.

[Anonymous No.]

Try as I might I... I can't hate this girl.

Just listen to her.

[Anonymous-chan No.]

>>7625610
http://vocaroo.com/?media=vf6l0dPZrptWcMKed

[Anonymous No.]

>>7625610

[Anonymous No.]

>>7625617

The "five inch" thing was a direct reference to KoG getting fives, not trying to make him manly. Making it say 2 inch does not insult but instead shows your newfaggotry.

Good day.

[Anonymous-chan No.]

>>7625615
http://vocaroo.com/?media=v0xM6KQvny0KYcQXY

[Anonymous-chan No.]

>>7625624
I-I am a new fag... b-because... I-I am not a l-loser... totes
M-My penis is... 9" long... flaccid...

[White Ren !YLuFFdRcFQ No.]

>>7625617
Way to go slut, this is going to be all over /jp/ tomorrow once KoG catches wind of it.

[Anonymous-chan No.]

>>7625637
Y-You act like... th-that's not an accomplishment... :3c

[Anonymous No.]

>>7625617
>>7625639
>>7625625

[Anonymous No.]

http://vocaroo.com/?media=v87oEIimWAJ75wkDV

[Anonymous No.]

http://vocaroo.com/?media=vNrha0UST8K9bxzuV

[Anonymous No.]

Pretend you're a supermarket cashier and say

Your total come to $45.17! Will that be cash or check?

[Anonymous No.]

Who gives a shit reported.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7625617

[Anonymous No.]

Nyanners? Is it really you?

[Anonymous No.]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v0nFfUupuyY
Stupid underage Cirno bitch shut the fuck up

[Anonymous No.]

"A-Are you frustrated? D-Does my picture of J-Japanese Dawson cooking Flanfly s-slightly irritate you?"

[Anonymous No.]

>>7625644
>>7625647
You both sound like faggots. I for one enjoy this girl and her voice acting more so than your shitting up the board. Not even summer.

[Anonymous No.]

get the fuck out ClRNO

[Anonymous No.]

http://www.youtube.com/user/ClRNO

We all know it's ClRNO from YouTube.

[White Ren !YLuFFdRcFQ No.]

Reported.
Go talk among yourselves over at >>>/soc/.
Nobody gives a shit.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7625661
http://vocaroo.com/?media=vGaGCYgUPd2ijtcqr

[Anonymous No.]

>>7625617

You do realize that you've unleashed hell, right?

[Anonymous No.]

>>7625668
there's been a ton of social crap around lately, the fuck is going on.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7625670

Shut your faggot face up already with your copypasta recordings. If you're in REAL TIME, say something related to the King of GETs, /jp/, or something that isn't prerecorded.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7625670
bad duke nukem impressions.mp3

[Anonymous No.]

>>7625673
http://vocaroo.com/?media=v3wD40fsVl0x9pnit

[Anonymous No.]

Okay, so I think I understand what's going on. You're curious that your "boyfriend" (read: fuck-of-the-week) spends a lot of time every day going F5 F5 F5 on 4chan's /b/, which is the only part of the fucking site he probably goes to. So you decided "Hey, I think I'll post a thread here and see what these CRAZY HILARIOUS INTERNET PEOPLE have to say!" I bet you like going to sites like Fark and collegehumor and Ebaumsworld when you're not posting glitter comments in people's myspaces and listening to the streaming mp3s they have linked on their profiles.

Also, you are a ridiculous waste of a human being with nothing better to do with your time than to sit here and say "Hey guys I'm a girl teehee I giggle and I'm soft and I get to wear cute clothes when I go out on Friday nights! Hey you know what'd be fun I have a good idea I'll sit here and press F5 F5 F5 on a thread I made and watch people from the internet talk to me!"

You're just trying to validate your vapid existence by proving your gender to you, yourself.

Femininity doesn't travel over Ethernet and DOCSIS, honey. When you're standing there at the bus stop in the morning on the way to your $8/hr part-time job, and people start talking to you, they're not "being nice people" - they're trying to find an opening to get a chance to fuck you. And you're so wrapped up in yourself that you don't even realize it, you just think that people are talking to you because you look cute and it brings a smile to their morning to see a pretty young thing like you.

But nobody would have known you were a girl if you hadn't fucking posted this abortion of a post. Therefore any and all conversation you're having here is completely initiated by you, for the sole purpose of garnering internal merit for yourself.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7625661
>>7625644 here
Don't talk shit about Duke Nukem anon. She is superior to this attention whoring slut.

[Anonymous No.]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6it85NSf-H0
>3:30

It's shit like this that makes me hate women. 3DPD

[Anonymous No.]

>voicefag taking requests
>/jp/ gets buttmad, voicefag leaves, never comes back
>everybody mad

This is why we can't have nice things. Instead of COMPLAINING about her, we could have exploited the hell out of her to say /jp/ related things. WAY TO RUIN EVERYTHING YOU DICKHEADS!

[Anonymous No.]

>>7625682
Wow your rite that would of been so epic xD

[Anonymous No.]

/jp/ is where the true oldfags and the highest of powerlevels reside. Most people on /jp/ have seen more anime series than 10+ average f/a/ggots combined. In addition a lot of people on /jp/ can watch anime without waiting for subs like you fucking faggot babbys. Generally, /a/ looks to each other for approval of things, while /jp/ looks inward at itself instead of relies on a hivemind mentality. Also /a/ has no OC besides shitty image macro memes that get old within a week; /jp/ translates VNs, games and has doujin translation teams that regularly post there. People at /jp/ know your own boards' subject far, far better than you do, fucking dream on if you think you have any kind of superiority in any way whatsoever.

We sneer at you fucking newfags/normalfags, your shonenshit Big 3 threads, quasi-/v/ mentality and everything else that makes /a/ suck fucking balls. /jp/ is a better board than /a/ could ever dream to be because most of you f/a/ggots are, in our eyes, eternal newfags, aka there is nothing you could ever say or do to bring yourself up to our level, because you aren't true oldfags. You're G/a/ia, you're ANN and MAL trash now. Stay away, we don't want you in /jp/, not now, not ever. Go on and continue existing in your own world of shit thinking that it's any good, while the master race quietly resides separated from you mongoloids.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7625680

I still don't hear the word "King of GETs" anywhere in there.

Cool copypasta bro.

[Anonymous No.]

In my home country, this is Gensokyo of japan, youkai student
1.stealing stuff everything
2.lyingto yama
3.spit to face when talking, mouth is bad smell
4.dont having money, many youkai student, hole in hats and dirty ribbons, old shoes
5.raping fairy because human gal say youkai boy no thanks, very ugly and fat
6.very smell of food eating by humans
7.very smell body, no bath long time, sometime 10 days?
youkai=monkey same same

[Anonymous No.]

>>7625682
But why would we want a slut?

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

>>7625680
Try hard of Duke Nukam?
No.

Stop that.

Forever.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7625682
Go back to /a/ or whatever terrible board you came from/

[Anonymous No.]

Yesterday at around noon, I had been extremely bored for the past couple of hours. So, despite all the temptations to just

jerk off to my manga, I decided to go to my friends house and hang out. We started to play pokemon and that got boring, so

he suggested doing prank calls. I honestly have never done any prank calls, though I have seen most of the Girl Talk

raids. He called the local gamestop and asked if they had any ps4's. I kinda cringed at the low brow humor, but I wanted

to try. He gave the phone to me. I had no idea what to say. He just told me to think up of some ridiculous story. Being

the /jp/ that I am, I decided to act like I misdialed and I was calling my waifu or something. I, sadly, have no

actual waifu and never had, so I have no idea what couples talk to each other like. He told me that he was going to download

a random number, so it wouldn't be anyone that I knew. Phone rang, person picked up, I started to talk. "Hey, how you

doing?" There was a pause. "So, are we gonna fuck tonight?" Another long pause, then the phone hung up.

I went home at around midnight, and my mom was in the living room sitting by the light. She seemed a bit upset, but I had

no idea why. She looked at me and then asked, "What have you been doing?". I started to think to myself OSHI-, my friend

must of called my house, that douche. "Uh... I have been hanging out at my friends." "O really.." My Dad walked into the

room, and he looked pissed off too. I know they must of knew it was me. I'm dead. Then my mom started off, "I found these

magazines in your room. we seriously need to talk about these." It was probably the weirdest feeling in the world. The

feeling relief that you weren't in trouble for something you did, and the feeling that you have just been caught with

porn.

So now I'm locked in my room. How do I get out?

[Anonymous No.]

>>7625686
http://vocaroo.com/?media=vxuKmkyQu2L4KKQ3n

[Anonymous No.]

>>7625695

Because she's a consistent slut? Seriously, she's been on 4chan for over a year now according to my own research, and for a female slut, that's a pretty long time. They're usually crying by the first couple of months after all the slut comments.

[Anonymous No.]

Captain: Our king is the god of war. He always stands on the frontline and does not know defeat.
Soldier 1: She, Sir.
Captain: What was that?
Soldier 1: Our king is a woman, sir.
Soldier 2: And quite a looker at that.
Captain: He always stands on the frontline and does not know defeat! No one can stand in the way of-
Soldier 1: Forgive me for speaking out of turn, Captain, but that?'s definitely a woman.
Soldier 3: Though it might be a man with coconuts in his armor.
Soldier 2: Are you trying to say that our king carries fruits in her chest?
Captain: His chest! Look! Our king?'s dauntless figure has not changed since he-
Soldier 1: She, Sir.
Captain: QUIET! Our king has not changed since he pulled out the sword of selection! The king does not age, and he certainly does not walk around with coconuts pressed to his chest!
Soldier 3: So our king is a woman.
Soldier 2: And quite a looker at that!
Soldier 1: I'm so glad that I?'m not the only one here that can see the blooming obvious!
Captain: Stop speaking of our king as if he were some common two-pence tramp! He, and I do mean he, is the incarnation of a dragon! He will lead us to victory against-
Soldier 1: She, Sir!
Captain: I've had enough out of you!
Soldier 1: With all due respect, Captain, you're a bloody loony! I am loyal to the king, but the king is a woman!
Soldier 2: And quite a looker at that!
Soldier 3: I wouldn't mind having a quickie with her, if you know what I mean!
Captain: ENOUGH! Our king is the blooming god of war! He does not walk around with coconuts in his chest, he is not quite a looker, and there will be no having quickies with our king!
Saber: Is there a problem, Captain?
Captain: Your majesty, I-
Soldier 1: Your majesty, you're a woman, right?
Saber: Gender is meaningless. I am the wielder of Excalibur and the King of Britain.
Soldier 3: She's a hermaphrodite?

[Anonymous No.]

_、,_
　① （⊂_　　ﾐ　Invented by Korean
　↓
　 ② （ ´_⊃｀）　Commercialized by American
　↓
　③ ﾐ　´_＞｀） Invested by British
　↓
　④ ξ ・_>・） Designed by French
　↓
　⑤ （ ´U_,｀） Publicized by Italian
　↓
　⑥ （　´∀｀）　Improved & miniaturized by German
　↓
　⑦ （ ｀ハ´）　Pirated by Chinese
　↓　　　_,,_
　⑧ <ヽ｀д´>　Claimed its origin by Japanese

[Anonymous No.]

>>7625701

Saved in my "Haters of KoG - Audio" folder

[Anonymous No.]

You ask for a hamburger, I give you a hamburger. You raise it to your lips and take a bite. Your eye twitches involuntarily. Across the street a father of three falls down the stairs. You swallow and look down at the hamburger in your hands. I give you a hamburger. You swallow and look down at the hamburger in your hands. You cannot swallow. There are children at the top of the stairs. A pickle shifts uneasily under the bun. I give you a hamburger. You look at my face, and I am pleading with you. The children are crying now. You raise the hamburger to your lips, tears stream down your face as you take a bite. I give you a hamburger. You are on your knees. You plead with me to go across the street. I hear only childrens laughter. I give you a hamburger. You are screaming as you fall down the stairs. I am your child. You cannot see anything. You take a bite of the hamburger. The concrete rushes up to meet you. You awake with a start in your own bed. Your eye twitches involuntarily. I give you a hamburger. As you kill me, I do not make a sound. I give you a hamburger.

[Anonymous No.]

It’s late at night. The enemy is out there, lying in wait. Only he’s well protected, impervious to your advances, hidden deep inside his fortified bunker. Your mission is clear: you need that thing torn up. But your missile lacks heft, girth and thrust. Your answer? The HARDBUT.

Meet the Hard and Deeply Buried Target Next Generation Multiple Warhead System, known as — yes — the HARDBUT. It’s designed to go deep where others can’t, penetrating the most secure command centers, hardened infrastructure and “underground facilities including caves,” according to its manufacturer. As you might have presumed, it’s European, designed by the Euro mega-missile giant MBDA, with research cash for testing it provided by the French and British defense ministries.

And it performs under pressure. MBDA announced today that the HARDBUT missile successfully smashed through a “massive concrete target” on September 14. The company boasted that the HARDBUT “penetrated through and exited the rear face of the target, demonstrating a penetration capability significantly in excess of any warhead currently produced by MBDA.” It sounds like it’s been raring to go, having not gotten any action since its first test in May.

Unfortunately, we’ve only got the company’s word to go on in assessing the power of the HARDBUT. MBDA didn’t reveal how thick the concrete target was, nor how big the multi-warheaded missile actually is. Here in the U.S., the Air Force is getting ready to unleash a 30,000-pound Massive Ordnance Penetrator by 2012, and the Defense Threat Reduction Agency is bolstering its own bunker-buster capability. That’s on top of the 5000-pound “Divine Thunderbolt” missile that the Air Force already has. Can HARDBUT top their performance?

The jury’s still out on whether Americans or Europeans make the more effective penetrators. Still, judging from MBDA, the HARDBUT is certainly nothing to laugh at.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7625700
suck on my fucking cock asshole stupid spoiled brat piece of trash

[Anonymous No.]

　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　 　 　　　　　 r　　　　　　　ィヽ
　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　 　　 　　　　　 　　| ヽ.　　　　 / / |
　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　 _ j　　vl!,⌒ `'ﾉ､ノ
　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　 ｨ!::::|ゝ'　　＼ゞ＼＼
　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　 　' /| :::|ノ　　　　iゞ､.ヾ! ヽ
　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　 　　　　,／　/　|!__|　　　　　ゞ,..ﾉ`ヽ,ﾘ
　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　 　　 　,. '　 '　　　|!　! ／･＼　 　 　 ﾉ'
　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　ｲ　　　　ﾉ' ″ ||　:::::⌒ゝ　　　,　 !
　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　 　　／ 　 　 　 ﾚ'/　 |r=ォ 　 　 i　 　_j._ l!
　　　　　　　 　 　　　 　　 　／　　/!　l!ﾚ''"/　　ハメ＼　　　／,. --ヽ
　　　　　　 　　_＿＿＿ ,.／　イ　/ﾉ!L,ﾉ　/　　∧| ＼:::＼r/:::/ヽ. 　 !′
　　　 　 , 　"´　　　 　 　7／ノ／ 　 　 ／　　/ 　ゞ.._ ＼::rt::/　　ヽ　ﾞ ､
　　　／　　 　　 　　　/　　　　　　　 '　　　　 ' 　　　　`rーゞﾗ　rｬ　　　 i
　 ／　 ,／　　　　　　'　　　　　 ／　　　　　/　 　　　 /　　 ヽ..:.:ゞ!､,.._ ,.:j
./　　ﾚ　　　　　　　'　　　　　　　　 　 　　　,　　　　　/　　　 　ゝ（__人__）
'　　 ' 　　　　　　 i　　　　　　　　ヽ　　 　 　 　 　　 /　　　　　　`ﾄｪｪｪｲ
　　'　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　 ∧ 　　　　　　　`ー'´

[ReactionImage.txt No.]

>>7625717
LOL. ARE ALL YOU /jp/s LIKE THIS?

No wonder I don't come to trash boards like this.

[Anonymous No.]

　　　∧＿∧
　　 （　´Д｀） ＜みなさーん、お茶が入りましたよ～
　　／　　　 ＼
　　|　l　　 　l　| 　　　 ..,. ., .,
　　|　|　　　 | _|｡.:_:：゜｡-.;.:゜｡:.:;。
　　ヽ ＼_　.｡'ﾟ/　　　`｡:､｀；゜:;.::.｡:.:。
　　 /＼_ﾝ∩ｿ＼　　　 ::..゜:: ﾟ｡:.:.::.。.｡:.
.　 /　 /`ｰ'ｰ'＼ ＼　　゜: ::..゜:: ﾟ｡:.:.:，｡:.:.
　〈 　く　　　　　/　/　::..゜:: ﾟ｡:.:.:，.:.:.:｡:.:，
.　 ＼　L　　　./　/　＿::..゜:: ﾟ｡:.:.:，.:.:，.:.:.:，
　 　　〉　）　 （　.::旦旦旦旦旦旦旦旦旦旦旦旦旦旦旦旦旦旦.
　　 （_,ノ　　　 .`ー'旦旦旦旦旦旦旦旦旦旦旦旦旦旦旦旦旦旦.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7625721
http://vocaroo.com/?media=vgCzd0IUkIEsDAtpn

[Freezing !qSaya2MQ6o No.]

I'm sick and tired of trying to play MMOs with hotglue.

You are all a bunch of autistic cunts. The most inconsiderate, the most selfish, the most tactless bunch. I can count on one hand the number of hotglue I've played with that are able to take it easy. Everybody else is pissy little princesses who think they deserve everything.

You do favors for hotglue, they don't even say fucking "thanks". And still they feel like you should continue doing things for them. It's like you've never been around people before, though I guess I shouldn't be surprised. I shouldn't expect an autists to understand group dynamics.

[Anonymous No.]

>>7625760
　　　　　　　　　　 /＼／ヽ　Why you not sage nida！
　　　　　　　　　　<ヽ｀∀´>
　　　　　　　　　　|_________┝━─　　　,;;;;";;;;""";;;;&
#44;,,,,,　I demand apology juice！
　　　　　　／￣★￣|￣￣丶二二];;;;;;;;　　　'''''';;;;;;;
　　　　][[／::::::::::::::::::::::|::::::::::::| 　　　　;;;;"";;;;;;;;"'''''
　δ|￣￣￣￣|￣￣￣￣|￣￣丶[_
　　＼.__________|____________|__／__／
　　　|:::::::::::「「＼（◎）____|＿＿|
　　　丶::::::::::丶／ ＼.][＼____／
　￣￣￣ 　　　＼（:◎）][＼
　　　　　　_______／　／＼][＼
　　　（⌒）______]_[／ 　　　＼][＼
　　　丶][丶　　　　　　　　　　（◎）
　　　　丶][丶 　　　　　　　／][／
_　　　___丶][丶.___　　　　／][／
　　　　|ｌｌｌｌｌ|◎丶ｌｌｌｌｌ| 　　|ｌｌｌ（◎）ｌｌｌ|

[Aya Shameful !I4IrJba9Qw No.]

I admit it, shes got a nice voice
my cute detector says so.