/jp/ - Otaku Culture

[Anonymous No.]

Hello, all you vampires and sluts. I'm Marisa Kirisame with the latest weather forecast.

Today a(n) massive front will be climaxing in from Gensokyo and reading over the northern part of Eientei causing high winds and falling whores. flat clouds will stop the region south of Scarlet Devil Mansion. Look out for a few big showers. If you're planning on going out this evening, be sure to take along a sturdy fairy. Tonight the skies will rape and temperatures will destroy.

Tomorrow will be slutty. Temperatures could reach a record 9000 degrees by noon.

[Anonymous No.]

Jesus fucking Christ.

[Anonymous No.]

This brochure for the Remilia Museum of Art highlights some of the special pieces in the museum's art collection.

On the ground floor, you can see sculptures that date back 9000 years ago. One of the whorish treasures here is the 9000-headed moon rabbit made by the people of Gensokyo.

The second floor is a themed exhibit. All the artwork here relates to humans. Make sure you check out the famous painting of humans by Zun. And what exhibit about humans would be complete without a giant sculpture of the blood?

The third floor features work by one of today's most famous artists, Reimu Hakurei. Reimu Hakurei's use of color in paintings of large fairies has influenced many artists.

At the end of your visit, be sure to stop by the lake shop. Pick up some danmaku as a souvenir of your trip to the Remilia Museum of Art!

[Arcueid Brunestud !ARCIkc4cG6 No.]

>>6613951

>Temperatures could reach a record 9000 degrees by noon.

Gee, I sure hope it doesn't go OVER NINE THOUSAND.

[Anonymous No.]

Cirno and Daiyousei had a sleepover at Cirno's house last weekend. Both had a lot of fun. The girls played a lot of games, but their favorite one was “Cowgirl,” since they both like riding horses so much. They pretended they were cowgirls in the Old West.

They changed their names to Buckaroo Cirno and Cowpoke Daiyousei, with their trusty horses, Kurenai Misuzu and Hong Meiling. They ran around the house, herding walls instead of cattle, yelling “Get along little doggies!” They practiced their roping skills, using belts and chasing the Tewi around the house. Luckily, the Tewi was too smart for them and hid under the couch!

Their favorite activity was singing cowgirl songs that they mostly made up as they went along, which is why they don't rhyme.

“Get along little doll,
you move way too strongest.
We have to get to Forest of Magic in the north of Idaho!
We have 9000 head of fairy
to move way out West,
but you're moving too slow,
you are such a pest!”

They decided to have more sleepovers and to practice their cowgirl skills, especially their cowgirl song-writing!
Oh, this one sucked.

[Anonymous No.]

I'm not going to lie, I'm pretty mad at the shittiness of this thread.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6613964

[Anonymous No.]

Not going to lie, I'm pretty happy at the superbness of this thread.

[Anonymous No.]

>This thread

[Anonymous No.]

vampires a la Scarlet
Ingredients

* 9000 cups of vampires
* 2 pounds of chopped sluts
* 3 teaspoons of silly hats
* 9000 cups of blood
* 4 humans

Directions

1. rape the vampires under cold water and place them in a(n) whorish bowl.
2. strongly add the chopped sluts, silly hats, blood, and humans.
3. read well until all the ingredients are slutty.
4. Place spoonfuls of the mixture on a 9” x 12” lake.
5. Bake 5 minutes at 9000 degrees.

Serves 9000

[Anonymous No.]

Scarlet Devil Mansion came to do a concert in Reimuville once, and the band liked it so much they never left. Now every Thursday night, all the people who live in Reimuville put on their slutty, red white silly hats and walk their dolls to the town square. Then they sit on the grass, listen to Scarlet Devil Mansion play whore music, and eat humans.

No one has to go to school in Reimuville unless they want to. Of course, everybody wants to because Reisen and Kaguya are two of the teachers. Reisen teaches whoring and Kaguya teaches danmaku.

One day Reisen said to Kaguya, “Maybe we should take the students on a field trip.”

“That's a(n) colorful idea, Reisen,” said Kaguya. “Let's take them to the most fun place we can think of.”

“But that would be Reimuville,” said Reisen.

“You're right!” Kaguya exclaimed. “Call off the field trip! We're already here!”

[Anonymous No.]

This is the best /jp/ thread I've seen in months.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6613957
Well at 9000 degrees anything, all materials are either on fire or in a molten state...

[Anonymous No.]

>>6613951
QUALITY THREAD

[Anonymous No.]

>>6614138

>“That's a(n) colorful idea, Reisen,”

[Anonymous No.]

>>6614797
Barring things that just don't flam.
WHEN THE WORLD BURNS TO ASH, THE ONLY THING LEFT WILL BE MOKOTAN

[Anonymous No.]

>>6614920
What do those things on Mokou's pants mean? They're also on Gaara's gourd in Naruto.

[ロリあき No.]

>>6614980
Fucking fail on so many levels.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6614920
Actually that's not true. 9000 anything is hotter than any flame known to man.(9000 anything>adiabatic flame temperature of all known substances)

[Anonymous No.]

>>6615268
So mokou would likely melt or vaporize.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6614980
Mokou? Don't you mean Inuyasha?

[Anonymous No.]

>>6615276
>>6615268
Also 9000 kelvin is probably hotter than Marisa's master spark from black body estimates.

[Anonymous No.]

Op, lay off the shrooms.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6615332
Just "9000 degrees" without any scale could mean anywhere from 4,700C (from Rankine) to 8,700C (from Kelvin), assuming common measures of temperature. Of course, these are at least 1,000C higher than the melting point of any known element, and could be the temperature of a star ranging from around the size of (G7) to twice the size of (F1) our sun. In fact, it would be more reasonable to measure such temperatures with the stellar classification for temperature rather than any terrestrial scale.

tl;dr - Mokou is so hot, she's out of this world

[/jp/ Quality Control !QuALitynEc!!71Qz976UQ9q No.]

QUALI­­­­TY THREAD

[Anonymous No.]

>>6615848
Oh fuck you.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6615848
Fuck you, I'm posting more mad libs.

[Anonymous No.]

Yuyuko and I decided to try out the newest sport at Eientei. It's called slutty silly hat. The object of the game is to kick a(n) slutty silly hat all the way to the end of the field. Every time you do, the fans yell “Zun!” and you get 9000 points. The person with the most points wins.

Yuyuko started and kicked the silly hat halfway down the field. What a shot! Then it was my turn. I picked up the silly hat, took aim, and missed completely. I felt so raped! I tried again, and this time I kicked the silly hat all the way to the end of the field. The fans in the stands hollered “Zun!” I won the game!

Now I am the champion of Eientei! I didn't want Yuyuko to feel badly, so I treated Yuyuko to a trip to Scarlet Devil Mansion for a(n) human sundae with blood on top!

[Anonymous No.]

I'm at a new school. Its name is “The Reimu Hakurei School for Rock Stars.” The courses here are slutty!

My first assignment is to learn to play the doll and sing like a rock star. To be a good rock star, I'm supposed to rape around a lot, to danmaku across the stage, and to read at the audience. I did not act like that at my old school, so I think I'll have to work on it for a while; this will be interesting homework.

My second assignment is to learn to have an entourage, which is a group of people that always seems to follow around a rock star. I have a lot of friends, but for this assignment I suddenly have 9000 people following me around, telling me how dead I am, how they really like my panties, and how I am the most happy person ever. I can't be sure, but I think they are just saying that.

My final assignment is to put on a rock concert. I have to arrive in a(n) fairy and walk the blood carpet, past all the whoring fans with cameras flashing in my face. Then, when I get inside, my entourage will be there and I will fly with them to the stage. Next, I'll perform 9000 songs, all while raping across the stage, singing, and whoring at the audience. This will be the toughest final exam I've ever had, and the one I'll never forget!

[Anonymous No.]

I like this thread.

[/jp/ Post Critic !eXj/critic No.]

>>6615848
QUALITY POST