/jp/ - Otaku Culture

[Anonymous No.]

So /jp/, there's something I've wanted to do for a while, and I was hoping for some input from everyone.

I'm a 23 year old female living in the Midwest US, and I'd like to be someone's maid. As much of it as I can.

I would live with the person, do some light cleaning, cooking, and generally be a companion for said person. Always wearing a maid outfit, acting in character as much as possible.

I can cook and clean, as I stated, but also deal with finances and be a lovely thing to show off when the person goes out.

That person would have to provide me with enough to pay my bills (about $200/month USD starting next month - phone bill and student loans), and of course give me a room to live in and let me eat with him/her as well. Other than that, I can't think of much more I would need.

I imagine the person being an otaku who wants companionship more than necessarily a girlfriend (though if things do go that far, I certainly wouldn't object), and who would love to have his anime maid there all the time.

I don't have much family of my own, though I do have a couple of friends who may want to visit from time to time, so it can't be someone who's entirely avoidant to social situations (though the people I know are genearally low-key otaku as well :3).

I'd be able to be anywhere in the US as long as I can get there (which won't be an issue soon), and I can manage to find a way to be in France/Germany if need-be (though I don't speak French or German much yet, I plan on learning much more than I know now).

Is this possible? Is anyone interested maybe? It's not something I plan on doing immediately, but if there is anyone has any ideas, either comment here or email me at [e-mail]. I'd at least like to keep a list of people I may be able to do this for some time.

Also, Sakuya/general maid thread <3

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

[PRINNY !.rEDaBGktE No.]

But it is boring in the Midwest, and Iowa is shit tier.

[Anonymous No.]

Possible? Sure. It wouldn't be easy though

[Anonymous No.]

[Necrobrotent No.]

200 bucks a month for a bondage slave without the bondage?

Why not just do assisted living, it pays good, you meet ton's of people and old people give away the coolest shit when they think they're going to die.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455400
Not in Iowa, luckily. Been through there a couple times, and never really want to visit again.

>>6455403
I know a few people here (Minneapolis) who would be more than interested, but just don't have the room/funds.

[Anonymous No.]

I'd be somewhat interested, but I won't be graduating until this spring, and who the hell knows how long it'll take me to get a job once I finish college.

[Necrobrotent No.]

>>6455412
Oh and its the only field that its not hard to find work in because of the rising surge of old people.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455412
I'm more than willing to do the bondage if I connect with the person well enough >:3 Plenty else, too. No promises made for that though since if I don't get along with them, I don't.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455419
Feel free to email me. It's not something I'm looking into doing immediately, as stated. I want to get an idea of what I'd be dealing with out there, and even if you're just interested at this point, it works for me :3

Besides, people who want a maid-san living with them are probably some pretty cool people, and I'm more than open to making friends too ^-^

[Anonymous No.]

I'm sorry to say OP, but for this, pics and timestamp really are a necessary thing for the proposition you offer.

Oh, and fuck yes, Sakuya thread.

[Necrobrotent No.]

>>6455424
You have absolutely no clue what I'm talking about but that aside did you even read the second part of the post.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455422
I've done assisted living already. Spent 6 months doing it (in a facility with 20 people though, not for a single person/couple). I want the chance to be in character as a maid though. Much more frequently than I do now. (Yes, I'd be happy being a maid all the time :3)

[Anonymous No.]

>I'm female


>231 posts and 75 ghost posts etc

[Anonymous No.]

I don't want a mentally ill person taking care of my needs.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455438
Was working on that - read my last post.
>>6455436
This is something I'll do when I'm more seriously considering instead of testing the response.

[Anonymous No.]

Either ugly as all fuck or batshit insane, or else you could just find a random sugar daddy who'd provide you with much more for doing much less.
>[e-mail]
...

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455375

OP is an illegal Mexican looking for a job.

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

THIS THREAD IS USELESS WITHOUT A PHOTO OF THE POTENTIAL MAID

[Anonymous No.]

[Necrobrotent No.]

>>6455449
I deleted the post after you posted. I guess I wish you the best of luck in your semi-insane endeavor, and hopefully a sane heterosexual relationship, unless both girls are hot.

[Anonymous No.]

No ones mentioned the emoticons?
What the fuck have we come too.

[Anonymous No.]

You'd have to live in my basement because all the floors upstairs in my house are occupied by all of my personal crap. The humidifier is loud and the pipe out to the sewer main periodically clogs with tree roots and five-day old fermented human shit backs up into the sump pit. Also, my neighborhood isn't that great. I hope you like angry black people and the homeless. The two houses adjacent to me have been broken into in the year after I moved in.

I beat off eleven times a week at minimum, so don't act surprised.

[Anonymous No.]

You'd have to live in my basement because all the rooms upstairs in my house are occupied by all of my personal crap. The humidifier is loud and the pipe out to the sewer main periodically clogs with tree roots and five-day old fermented human shit backs up into the sump pit. Also, my neighborhood isn't that great. I hope you like angry black people and the homeless. The two houses adjacent to me have been broken into in the year after I moved in.

I beat off eleven times a week at minimum, so don't act surprised.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455486
At least OP is contributing by posting pictures.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455486

I couldn't think of a clever response apart from simply pointing it out and it was already blindingly obvious this was a troll thread, so there's nothing else to do but take it in good humor.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455486
> too.

[Anonymous No.]

Don't expect people to believe that I'm not crazy (based off of this thread alone expecially), but not sure how much I care.

It's mostly an "email me if you might be interested, we can talk about it more etc later" and I'm sure pictures can be sent if they're not all on my external in storage (time stamped ones when I have my maid costume back from storage also and a place to live again though)

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455486
There's something kind of sad about the way that things have come to be. Desensitized to everything. What became of subtlety?

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

Now THIS is how to troll. Goddamn.

Though, I admit I laughed my ass off when I imagined you living with me. Waking up at 3AM because a paranoid editor who knows my sleep schedule rang my phone to bitch about deadlines. Seeing me rush out the back door in my underwear as I load an M-1 carbine because coyotes are howling out back, and they might go after my goats, or the pony. Delicately trying to pluck that "one mug" away from me, causing me to growl and glower at you from above my laptop's screen. Trying to clean the kitchen table, and eventually cleaning AROUND me because I'm writing a new column and my muse has superglued my ass to the chair. And best of all, the inevitable exchange when I ask you for fashion advice-

"So how does this look on me?"

"The shirt? It looks nice~"

"No, I mean, am I printing?"

"... what?"

"Can you see the outline of my gun?"

"What!?"

"Guess that answers that question. Let's go."

"...."

[Anonymous No.]

I looked up this person's livejournal or at least what is more likely his livejournal and found this
>23. If you could change anything about me, would you? meh. irrelevance again. all the people I know these days are allergic to human contact. no hugs, no kisses, no friendly snuggles or anything. I cant understand that sort of thing no matter how hard I try so...i'd change that I suppose.

seeing this it is clear that this woman is so repulsive people avoid any intimate contact though she rationalize this to think its their fault.
with this in mind anyone paying heed to this potential scam be warned she is probably homely and possibly repulsive in other ways.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455519
Marisa Kirisame is that you and your goddamned 5.7?

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455528
Don't have a LJ, try again

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455534

>implying I'd ever carry a plastic gun

[Anonymous No.]

What the fuck is going on in here?!

[PRINNY !.rEDaBGktE No.]

[Anonymous No.]

Just wait a few years OP, i will be rich and you will be part of my harem.

Everday you'll go to my room and say "onii-chan wake up, onii-chan" and then we'll have furious sex.

Forever alone ;_;

[White Ren !YLuFFdRcFQ No.]

This doesn't look like it'd get me killed, cut into numerous pieces, and buried in trash bags over a 200 mile radius at all!

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455544
Why is 1911 such a cute gun? I kinda wish I lived in a country with less strict gun control laws only so I could get one.

[Anonymous No.]

This sounds. . .stressful. A complete stranger living in close quarters? Me having to boss her around?

What am I supposed to do if I want to play a video game? I can't just play a video game and ignore my guest.

Fuck you, rotten piece of shit. Since you're in the midwest, go to the nearest person you can find and buy all the meth you can. Take it all at once and die.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455375
>$200/month
>light cleaning, cooking, and generally be a companion for said person

Let me get this, so I'm paying you to sit on your ass doing fuck all while having to provide food and accommodation, not to mention possibly having to purchase some stupid french maid outfit from some fetish store and getting stared at, not to mention the electricity, water and other utilities you'll be using for free and having to put up with your friend from time to time?

I might be a sucker, but I'm not mentally retarded.

A dog can provide better companionship and cost less.

Scam much.

[Anonymous No.]

>$200/month USD starting next month - phone bill and student loans), and of course give me a room to live in and let me eat with him/her as well.

That's like 500 dollars every month, i'm not even that expensive for my parents,i could buy 3 touhou figures with that money.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455573
Nah, looks legit. People don't do stuff like that or other things like strapping you down, cutting off your penis and shoving it in your own asshole while shitting in your face and later forcing you to eat your own body slowly over time.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455586
All you have to do is yell MAID, I'M PLAYING ____. YOU'RE PLAYING TOO/YOU'RE WATCHING.

Or if you're more touchy-feely, MAID, I'M USING YOUR LAP AS A PILLOW

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455599
But will they do it in a maid uniform?

This is a relevant questions.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455600
I'm alright with that

[Anonymous No.]

You forgot the phone bill.

I can already imagine that bitch talking all day on the phone doing nothing.

[Anonymous No.]

It's sad but I honestly would consider something like this, if it wasn't from some random person on /jp/ who's probably a dude and/or 500 pounds.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455600
But I don't want to yell at my maid. ;_;

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455621
you don't have to stop that low bro
you're better than that

[[b] !KqqisuzyQQ No.]

Reminds me of this one maid doujin.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455621
You can always email me. If you get trolled, you get trolled (not much to be lost). If not, you could have a maid.

[Anonymous No.]

That's nice, but I don't really need a full time meido.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455580

>1911
>cute

I do believe this is a first. Ironically, many Japanese officers bought them instead of the Type 14 Nambu pistol (because it was a legendary piece of shit,) so it's already got a kawaii stamp of approval.

This thread is getting surreal. Have the best Sakuya picture ever made.

[Anonymous No.]

>let me eat with him/her as well.
Just sort of scanned the thing, and deal breaker here.
I, like most of /jp/ I imagine would rather take our meals in peace and solitude rather than with some one loud and obnoxious ruining the atmosphere.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455622
I guess you could always pose them in the form of a question.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455633

Oh, I need to find source on this. That last panel is fucking hilarious.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455644
Not loud/obnoxious, and if you want your meal alone, that's fine too. It's what master would want

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455633
is this the one where they go after each other's butts in a later chapter and afterwards they are like "my ass hurts :("

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455621
dont listen to >>6455634
she's going to scam you
she's going to milk you for all you're worth

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455670
mite b cool if it involves milking the prostate

[[b] !KqqisuzyQQ No.]

>>6455621
A BUTLER!

I've been thinking lately of being one too. Like batman's.

[[b] !KqqisuzyQQ No.]

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455684
i meant monetarily you silly goose

[[b] !KqqisuzyQQ No.]

[Anonymous No.]

Perhaps if I made a few different decisions in life, had a more flexible budget and comfortable living arrangements, I would inquire further about this proposition with serious intent. We would go out into town every month in classy atire and search for interesting things we may need at home. It would be a very simplistic and professional situation but with a slight 'something' growing out from the everyday mutual relationship.

;_;

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455644
Don't you know what happens when two silent people come together to dine? It's still silent. It can be awkward if you don't feel comfortable around said person, but if you loosen up on it, you'll get the best of two worlds: peace and a potential conversation of your choice. But I totally get what you mean if you're coming from e.g. a chittchatting normal environment. I spend most my time alone, but when it comes to having a meal it somehow feels more proper when enjoyed in company. I know, it sounds cheesy, and it kinda is, but I guess that's just a consequence of being a social being.

[Anonymous No.]

Alright, all reverse image searches turn up nothing. What's the name of this doujin, please?

[[b] !KqqisuzyQQ No.]

[The Destroyer of Elah !!EzZ4ge15Iuj No.]

>>6455375
Depends. Can you freeze time and throw daggers?

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455662

Maid Bride / メイド嫁

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455709
Pygma-chan's Raging Battle of Intense Passion - the sub-series.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455709
>all
I don't think so. You are just fucking lazy.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455718

Also, the translation gets pretty horrible early on.

[[b] !KqqisuzyQQ No.]

0EX_01_016.jpg through 025.jpg never happened.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455719

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455718
>>6455728

Thank you.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455706
Even if it's not something you can do as it is now, message me. Things change, and I'm always open to new friends.

[[b] !KqqisuzyQQ No.]

Part two

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455684
>>6455668

[[b] !KqqisuzyQQ No.]

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455686
Butlering is serious fucking business my friend. It's a harsh, regimented lifestyle that allows for no slip-ups or mistakes.

First off, I would recommend serving in your nation's military. This is not to make you some special super butler, it's to instill in you a sense of discipline and personal responsibility (as well as the correct airs towards superiors).

Second, become fastidious towards your life. This is again an area where a spell in the military helps. You must be clean and conserved at all times, shoes polished, waking up early and at regular times, etc.

Thirdly, learning the skills of the trade. Read up and learn about fine dining, wines, taking care of clothing, quality tailoring, etc. Then you have a few options on how to proceed.

You can try to get yourself apprenticed to a butler or work as hired help in a high-class environment and/or attend a 'Butler school'. The first is very difficult to achieve and the second is remarkably expensive.

When you are fully prepared and trained, you will face a life of incredibly early starts and servitude that will test your mental and physical limits, all while maintaining a proper attitude in face of any events.

[Fujiwara no Mokou !!WMmFy7x/tgp No.]

If it was a scam for /jp/ she'd have said 13, not 23.

[[b] !KqqisuzyQQ No.]

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455762
A little too old for me.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455765
can you give source
so that I don't have to wait anxiously

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455743
I'll do that. If nothing else, this thread gives me a bit of inspiration to do a little bit more in life. A more relaxed, promising world is not too far away if I push a bit further, try a little harder, and build the dreams that lie before me. I'm going to finish making dinner and practice a little better on the piano. Have a good night everyone. Say hi to Flan at 2:00 for me.

[[b] !KqqisuzyQQ No.]

>>6455756
Is all that talk from experience?

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455770
was already mentioned earlier in the thread

[[b] !KqqisuzyQQ No.]

>>6455770
>>>/rs/maid+bride
there should be a pack with chapters 1 through 4

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455777
yeah I was being lazy,, found it.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455777
>>6455779
thanks, you guys are being a little too nice.

[[b] !KqqisuzyQQ No.]

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455779
http://www.hentairules.net/2010/04/02/maid-bride-english-238-pictures-complete-by-kizuki-aruchu-with
-the-chapters-1-5-uncensored/

fuck you 4chan not allowed to post part of my comment my ass

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455779

>PRAISE THE LORD

[White Ren !YLuFFdRcFQ No.]

Eventually, you will be able to order a humanoid automaton that will accomplish the same thing. I look forward to sitting on the couch with my automaton maid, as I munch on food and watch the newest, semi-shitty anime of the month with her.

She'll wearily ask me for additional oil, and I'll begrudgingly go out to the shed and get a new can. I can't have her seizing up again. It was too pathetic to watch her the last time, almost like she wanted to cry, but wasn't designed to. When she asks me what I want for dinner, I'll know just to ask for what we had within the last three days: her cooking subroutine still has a weird bug when recalling old recipes, which ends up with her doing things like making deep-fried broccoli.

Being one of the first models, she'll sometimes develop sensory vertigo and fall down. But that's okay. I'll just tell her to take a break and play some meltan with me. I wouldn't want her falling into the bathtub and cracking it, again.

Heartwarming, when she wonders why I spend so much time with her. Embarrassing, when she recommends I see a doctor because I'm so thin and pale. Occasionally brilliant, when she decides to plug herself in with the neighbor's electric yard socket. Irredeemable, when she ruins my dakimakura by putting it in the wrong wash cycle.

An utterly useless maid, only good for spending waning years with.

[White Ren !YLuFFdRcFQ No.]

>>6455812
One of the only good posts I've seen you make.

[[b] !KqqisuzyQQ No.]

>>6455806
I didn't know ch5 had been done.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455812
>>6455817
Forgot to take off your trip much?

[White Ren !YLuFFdRcFQ No.]

>>6455825
Oh, summer, how wonderful thou art.

[[b] !KqqisuzyQQ No.]

[Anonymous No.]

I didn't even realize the manga is NSFW until I downloaded it. I just finished fapping to it.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455519
I'm glad I'm not the only one laughing. Even the comments are cash.

One point of note, however: I've seen several people highlight "$200" as wa-y too much, therefore stamping it as a sham. Fuck, people. $200 is about what I get in monthly allowance; for doing what? Absolutely fucking nada. Jesus Christ, and that makes me too embarassed to ram up all the other stuff I get for doing nothing (other than studying in my own pace). Makes you think of how unfair the chances of life are.

[Fujiwara no Mokou !!WMmFy7x/tgp No.]

>>6455825
Actually, I regret to inform you that you just owned yourself...

But anyways, how many of you are interested in this maid's offer?

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455843
I was, until
>female

[[b] !KqqisuzyQQ No.]

>>6455839
Sorry, I thought it was obvious.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455828
>>6455843
Note how this tripfags cover their own dumbassness.
this will be on the test, anons.

[White Ren !YLuFFdRcFQ No.]

Well, if you want to come down and stay for a while, that's fine with me. I think I extended the same offer to Tatari~n when he said he was going to be kicked out.

You'll have to make do with a guest room and Southern cooking, though.

The alternative is that you could get an apartment with me and pay rent. A two-bedroom around here is like 400 every month for each person. If you cook, clean, and everything, then you could just work for 200 part time!

Win/win.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455843
I'm actually interested and considered it,
only thing is that I'm living with normal people, if I were living by myself I would try this offer for a couple months just to see what would happen.
honestly not worried about getting tricked and buttraped, I'm sure this is the last place people would go to find people to rob from.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455853
>these

[White Ren !YLuFFdRcFQ No.]

>>6455858
>I'm sure this is the last place people would go to find people to rob from.


From what I've heard, we have some trust-fund kids that post here. I wouldn't be surprised.

[Anonymous No.]

Read the OP post as
>I'm a 23 year old male
Made the entire thread a lot more creepy.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455858
>>6455857
Again, feel free to email me. I don't plan on anything immediate, but I'd like to see what sorts of things other people have in mind and what would be best to work out

[[b] !KqqisuzyQQ No.]

[White Ren !YLuFFdRcFQ No.]

>>6455874
Well, I don't really care who I have as a roommate. I just need a body to help cover rent. If that person wanted to never speak with me ever again, I wouldn't care, as long as I had food and rent money.

I mean, multiple door locks are for dealing with crazies, anyway.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455812
>>6455817
>>6455818
>>6455825
>>6455828

There is no board-specific in-joke that can make this look better.

[White Ren !YLuFFdRcFQ No.]

>>6455904
I'm not sure exactly what you mean, besides the guy that is like a year late for Maid Bride being completed.

[Anonymous No.]

I JUST noticed you skipped the h-bits.

Need to wake up.

[[b] !KqqisuzyQQ No.]

ch4

[[b] !KqqisuzyQQ No.]

>>6455912
Should I feel bad about that?
>>6455917
Yah man, blue board, sfw, etc.

[[b] !KqqisuzyQQ No.]

[White Ren !YLuFFdRcFQ No.]

>>6455935
I dunno, should you? You're just not very attentive.

[Anonymous No.]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6hY2SFH4Y9c
I was thinking that maybe I'd get a maid...

[[b] !KqqisuzyQQ No.]

>>6455946
There are better things to do other than wait for the next chapter in a H doujin.
Like trolling /g/, procrastinate on /jp/, and sleep.
But who knows, maybe you're right.

[Anonymous No.]

Am I the only one who thinks the girl in Maid Bride looks like Wilhelmina Carmel?

[[b] !KqqisuzyQQ No.]

ch4 end
Now if someone would be nice enough to post the sfw parts of ch5, that'd be peachy.

[White Ren !YLuFFdRcFQ No.]

>>6455953
That's been a very pointed out thing.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455586
>>6455586

this was posted a while ago, but still this is a goddamn funny post. the completely uncalled for insults are great

[Anonymous No.]

You're hired! I'm a twenty year old make living in Cali. And I'd like someone to by my maid. First problem I see with your post is this "light cleaning" If I'm paying you 200 I'm going to find shit for you to do, nothing horrible though, just typical house maintenance.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455969

You have no idea how much real maids make do you? Speaking as someone who has lived with them for ~9 years of my life I can promise you they were paid much more than $200 a month.

[Anonymous No.]

Well, I certainly have the finances... and the need, I'm a messy, busy guy... but there's one thing I desire above all else. One more person, on one more laptop, to play a game with me... a game I can never, ever find somebody to play with.

So- the test. Give me the proper name of the centerpiece object in attached pic.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455988
>>6455988
I'm a maid and I make around 100 a day lol

[The Destroyer of Elah !!EzZ4ge15Iuj No.]

>>6455843
I considered it for about half a second, which says more about how lonely I am than anything else.

[Fujiwara no Mokou !!WMmFy7x/tgp No.]

>>6455988
But it's not about being real maids. Think about it.

Either homelessness in a poor economy, or find a decent place to live and feel happy at at the same time. Not everyone is always calculating! For some of us simple things are enough!

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455988
he's not the one who threw out the $200 figure to begin with

[Anonymous No.]

>>6455999
GODDAMN MOSQUITOS I WILL SWAT YOU WITH MY EIGHT EIGHTS