/jp/ - Otaku Culture

[Arcueid Brunestud !ARCIkc4cG6 No.]

Wait, no.

Okay. You know Murder-Yuuka? The Yuuka that is an unstoppable killing machine in Fanon?

Imagine a Slasher film set in Gensokyo, with her as the killer. It's like Friday the 13th, or Nightmare on Elm Street.

And everyone who has sex dies. For example, Aya and some virile human from the Village are getting it on behind a house.

Then Yuuka appears and Final Sparks both of them into charred bones.

Even better: Sanae's about to suck some random dude off. She leans forward - and is impaled through the head by Yuuka's umbrella. Then Yuuka cuts the guy's dick off and has him bleed to death.

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

You had me until "hurr durr slut."

[Anonymous No.]

I suppose it would feature lots and lots and lots of sequels.

Also, why so violent, Arc? Didn't get your daily dose of sit-ups again?

[Anonymous No.]

A girl is browsing /jp/ in public. Jones notices she also has a ⑨ sticker on her laptop.
Being the manly guy he is, Jones approaches the cute female anon and attempts to strike conversation.
"Nice sticker you have there."
Being your average /jp/er, the femanon blushes and starts stumbling on her own words when trying to speak.
"Uh, t-thanks? Do I know you?"
"Oh, maybe. I couldn't help but notice the website you were visiting." says Jones with a smug grin. The femanon lowers her head in shame and minimizes the tab.
"Uh, I don't really go to 4chan or /b/, if that's what you're saying."
Jones laughs, as he realizes that's what an average interneter would think if he saw 4chan.org in the URL bar on someone's computer. That crazy /b/ site with the memes and rickrolls.
"No, no. I mean /jp/. I go there quite often."
The femanon turns back and looks at Jones, almost like she was profiling him.
"No way. No one from /jp/ would talk to a girl eye-err-ell." The girl laughs, realizing how silly Internet acronyms sound when spoken. "Also, you look too handsome to be from /jp/. Oh, erm."
The girl turns to her computer again and turns red like a tomato.

[Anonymous No.]

Jones is amused at this turn of events. "Haha, that's to be expected. I'm no average /jp/er. I use a tripcode."
"Are you serious?" The girl's curiosity was spiked, overriding her embarrassment. "Please don't tell me you're ZUN!bar."
Jones stares, faking offense. "Please, do I look like I have a two inch penis?"
The girl lets out a laugh, for the first time. Jones notices it's actually a quite pretty laugh, not annoying at all.
"I see, considering you remember that sort of stuff, you must be a true /jp/ bro!"
"Yes. I'm Anonymous Jones." Jones finally proclaims, with the due pause to increase suspense.
"Oh wow!" exclaims the girl, excited "I never met anyone from /jp/ before, let alone a /jp/ celebrity. Well, besides me, that is."
Jones chuckles, with his ego boosted by knowing he's a celebrity on a website for reject losers. "Oh, you're also a celebrity, then?"
The girl turns away once again. "Uh, I post with the name Pygmal--"
And then Jones wakes up in his room. Alone.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6342324

Imagine if all biological women grew to these proportions.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6342447
3D becomes even worse than it already is.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6342447

The whale would be humanity's closest relative.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6342440
>>6342445
Originally, I wanted to post a reaction image responding to this with disgust, but I changed my mind and decided to post something more useful. So, have a dickgirl performing autofellatio instead.

[Anonymous No.]

Yuuka is the unsung heroine.

[Anonymous No.]

Hey, I can understand murder, but cunt blocking is just plain foul play.

>>6342460
Well, humans have lots of fat in their bodies, and there is a persistent theory that we did not come down from the trees, but from some aquatic ape-thing, which would explain the sore lack of fossils...

[Anonymous No.]

>>6342324
I'm pretty sure I've seen a few pictures of Yuuka cutting a guy's dick off or similar. What the hell is that about.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6342506
Common tags and nicknames associated to Yuuka:

do S hoihoi (Ultra sadism)
USD/Ultimate Sadistic Creature
Flower Master of the Four Seasons/Yuukarin

All things associated to her are kind of mean or fearsome.

Also, it is kind of refreshing to see guys being ripped apart. A nice break from the usual guro bullshit.

[Arcueid Brunestud !ARCIkc4cG6 No.]

>>6342364

>Also, why so violent, Arc?

I was watching 'Saw 3'.

Then suddenly I remembered our favorite Flower Youkai that /jp/ is so fond of posting pictures of covered in blood. It occurred to me that she's Jason Voorhees/Freddy Krueger status, if you believe /jp/ - a slow, relentless, unstoppable serial killer.

>Insert picture of Yuuka ripping some dude's testicles off, the one that /jp/ LOVES to repost, but I don't have time to go look for it.

[/jp/ Quality Control !QuALitynEc!!71Qz976UQ9q No.]

QUALIT­­Y­ THREAD

[Ayashiro !Hime2512LA No.]

>>6342445
>>6342440
Portuguese Eksopl posting hand-written fan fiction

[Arcueid Brunestud !ARCIkc4cG6 No.]

Wow, this thread is still here. Radical.

This is clearly a sign that Nightmare on Yuuka Street - or Friday the Yuuka, is meant to be. Where making it hapen, etc

[Anonymous No.]

>>6344942
>Wow, this thread is still here. Radical.
Of course it's still here if you keep on bumping it.

[Arcueid Brunestud !ARCIkc4cG6 No.]

>>6344984

It keeps happening.

[Necrobrotent No.]

Arc's just mad he'd die first if /jp/ was a slasher flick.

[Anonymous No.]

another shitty Arcueid Brunestud thread

[Arcueid Brunestud !ARCIkc4cG6 No.]

>>6345081

>implying I'm not already dead on the inside

[Necrobrotent No.]

>>6345141
No that's just depressing.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6345156,1
You're very believable.