/jp/ - Otaku Culture

[Anonymous No.]

I have been collecting the felch from my anus over the past several years and have been storing it in an a 55 gallon oil drum. Through painstaking dedication and perseverance, I have nearly filled the drum to the brim.

My technique is thus: I enlist the help of a sixty year old whore with AIDS named Trixie to guide the erect penis of a thoroughbred horse into my rectal cavity, where, with a few convincing strokes it erupts with thick semen to coat my insides. I then have Trixie felch the semen from my ass and we snowball it between ourselves several times before she deposits it into a jar prior for transport to the felch-drum. Furthermore, I rarely give myself an enema so as to aid in my efforts of obtaining the highest quality felch possible through this technique.

The felch I have obtained smells of putrid ass and equestrian ejaculate, and I have kept it at its original consistency by keeping the drum sealed.

I intend to take my drum of felch and inject portions of it in turn into the rectum of a five day old corpse with a catheter, after which I will then felch it out myself. Through this process, I hope to achieve an even higher grade of felch that is sure to be heady in its aroma and exquisite in its taste. I am sure that even the most exclusive of felch connoisseurs will be pleased.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6232002
Then what OP?

[Anonymous No.]

What's felch though?

[Anonymous No.]

>>6232011
I then decided it was time to get something to eat. I kind of felt like fried chicken for a change, so I decided to book it on over to the nearest Popeye's Chicken.

Once there, I placed my order and after a short wait I was able to enjoy my meal.

The breasts were juicy, and the buns were soft and warm, and the coleslaw was just right.

Afterward, the division manager of Popeye's came up to my table and asked me how the meal was. I said I was satisfied, but the meal lacked a certain je ne sais quoi. He apologized profusely, and said he had something to show me that would make up for it.

He lead me to the back of the Popeye's, to a room soaked from floor to ceiling in blood. In the center of it was a live horse, chained by all four legs to the structural supports of the warehouse like room. As I watched, employees of the Popeye's cut large sections from the horse, which was screaming in horror. The Popeye's employees took the chunks of flesh and sliced them into pieces, then they rooted around through the bags of trash strewn around the room to find discarded chicken bones. They quickly tenderized the meat with sledgehammers and fed it into a machine which formed the horse meat around the bones, then they breaded and deep-fried it.

I asked the division manager why he had led me back to this place, and he pointed at the horse's rump, the asshole puckering rhythmically with terror. "We're just about to use that section, would you like a crack at it first?"

I quickly unzipped my pants and wasted no time jamming my erect penis into the horse's defenseless asshole. I came just as the horse died. I was delighted. Popeye's definitely went the extra mile to make me a satisfied customer.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6232024
At least they'll try to make you leave with a great feeling.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6232024
This is my favorite copypasta of all time.

I lost it like 2 years, so thanks for reposting it.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6232050
I am the original author of that copypasta. I must confess, it was one of my favorite as well. I used to post it on /b/ and gamefaqs a few years back, back when I still visited such places.

These days, I'm mostly retired save for trolling /prog/ with anus threads.

However, continuing on with my diatribe, the whole reason for creating this thread is to say good bye. Yes, good bye.

My hourly check-up-on-/jp/-to-see-if-it-stopped-sucking visit is coming to an end, and as before, I shouldn't have bothered. It's even called "Otaku Culture" now, for sanitary purposes.

If you're here now and you think /jp/ - Otaku Culture is a safe haven from the outside world, you might be right. Perhaps it is somewhat isolated from normal people, of whom you all mostly fear, but it is but walking shadow, a poor player, that struts and frets his hour upon the stage, compared to the old /jp/.

What you are seeing today is just an endless looping rehash of the fun we had discussing our narrow interests related to Touhou and visual novel trivia. If you think it's exciting now, try to imagine the fun we had when it was fresh, and people had the time to play and experience all of the new content as /jp/ gave birth to it. It was a time of creativity, a time of sharing war stories about being ostracized and banned for posting Touhou content on /a/ before the split. Bitter memories. Good times.

Feeling like Marisa Kirisame reminiscing about the splendor of having tea at Scarlet Devil Mansion, where she once spent a fortnight studying in the great library, comparing everything to that glory now lost and unable to see her surroundings for what they are, but only what they are in comparison, I bid you adieu. See you next hour, and keep on trying.

[Anonymous No.]

>>6232113
you sir, are an internet super hero

[Anonymous No.]

>>6232113
Cool blog bro.
This is now a Ruri thread.

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

Ruri on /jp/?!

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

I remember fapping to Ruri in newtype when I was like 13, those were the days.