/jp/ - Otaku Culture

[Anonymous No.]

Patchouli Knowledge

A powerful magician.

Not very friendly.

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

And here's a pic of her wife

[Anonymous No.]

>>5551947
Robocop and patchy make a great couple, so moe~

[Anonymous No.]

Patchouli Knowledge

Has huge tits.

Hated for it by flat vampire lolis

[Anonymous No.]

People think she's gloomy, but she likes hip hop and stuff.

[Anonymous No.]

>>5551969
>fanon shit

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552007
>captain obviousity

[Kilga M. Aya~n !2BklmILFiE No.]

hello patchy how are you doing this fine evening

i am doing very well thank you for asking and may i say you look lovely today

so what is that novel you have in your hand would you care to share with the rest of us

[Magical Index !MOONRXwPDU No.]

>Asperger Syndrome (Unconfirmed but definitely a possibility. Known symptoms she seems to have are as follows: extremely obsessed, devoted and knowledgeable in her interests (she has a lot of knowledge in her field of magic), lack of non-verbal communication, lack of showing emotions in expressions, trouble understanding emotions and no social empathy, speaking formally (and assumable, monotone voice), physical clumsiness, literal thinking, a strong attachment to routines or familiar objects, food allergies (might describe her lack of Vitamin A), leading a Hikikomori life, considering her intelligence to be her strongest point, being very detail oriented (precise about everything), physical inactivity, issues with planning or excecuting house tasks properly, et cetera)

[Anonymous No.]

You know you'd take a lick or three

[Kilga M. Aya~n !2BklmILFiE No.]

my apologies i did not realize it was your diary

of course you do not have to share the contents of your diary with us patchy those are your private thoughts to be locked away for only your eyes to see

[proREMIRIAt Elite Force Commander !rSDMROXTB. No.]

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552048

I'd study that, with my tongue, if you know what I mean.

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552048
>white fingernails
this made me asplode

[Kilga M. Aya~n !2BklmILFiE No.]

>>5552048

good sir i ask that you please refrain from embarrassing patchy in such a manner it is quite rude to expose another's intimate body parts to the public without their consent

[Anonymous No.]

Anonymous

(ry

[Houraisan Kaguya !NEATnUrmu2 No.]

>>5552077
I love painted nails so much.
I don't know why.

[Kilga M. Aya~n !2BklmILFiE No.]

okay patchy things should be fine now the mean man is gone and you will be okay

so do you have any interesting tales regarding your household with which to captivate us tonight for we would surely like to hear them

[Kilga M. Aya~n !2BklmILFiE No.]

>>5552096

oh no now look at what you have done patchy is angry and ready to beat you up

for a sickly anemic and asthmatic bookworm i must say that she sure is ripped

patchy please calm down he did not mean to be so rude i assure you

[Anonymous No.]

I thought the library had a funny smell

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

Koakuma

A minor demon.

Simple and emotional.

[Anonymous No.]

a really knowledgeable girl, that's for sure

[Kilga M. Aya~n !2BklmILFiE No.]

no patchy seriously do not give in to your rage and hatred i know you may have some anger management issues but you are better than that you are one of gensokyo's greatest intellectuals i mean your goddamn name has the word "knowledge" in it how much smarter can one get

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552148
>Simple and emotional
Is she on her period?

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552120

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552158
if its a problem for her she can drop by my place and I'll fix it for her for 9 months.

[Kilga M. Aya~n !2BklmILFiE No.]

oh jesus fuck

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552158
Do demons have periods? Do demons bleed? Can they get pregnant? How long will I have to wait for my first crop of demon spawn?

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552189

Depends, are you playing on Regular or Nightmare mode?

[Houraisan Kaguya !NEATnUrmu2 No.]

>>5552120
>>5552157
>Wrestling dom Patches
I'm okay with this.

[Kilga M. Aya~n !2BklmILFiE No.]

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552145
>PatchyEarningBookMoney.jpg
bueno

[Anonymous No.]

She needs all the time she can get for reading books, so she doesn't bother to completely undress for sex

[Kilga M. Aya~n !2BklmILFiE No.]

christ here we go

for fuck's sake patchy CALM THE FUCK DOWN

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552204
LOOK AT DAT ASS

[Kilga M. Aya~n !2BklmILFiE No.]

wait what

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552220
For an extra book she'll let you cum inside

[Houraisan Kaguya !NEATnUrmu2 No.]

>>5552225
That picture makes it look like her crotch is on fire.
Or is fire.

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552199
I always play on Hell mode.

[Kilga M. Aya~n !2BklmILFiE No.]

oh i see you were only joking

well please do not scare me like that in the future patchy

[Kilga M. Aya~n !2BklmILFiE No.]

okay yes i fell for it hahaha

now let us please move on

[proREMIRIAt Elite Force Commander !rSDMROXTB. No.]

[Kilga M. Aya~n !2BklmILFiE No.]

okay you can stop anytime it wasn't that funny

please stop laughing at me patchy ;_;

[Anonymous No.]

I bet Patchy doesn't smell half as bad as people say.

[Kilga M. Aya~n !2BklmILFiE No.]

oh you silly patchy you laughed yourself to exhaustion

it is like you have no idea of your physical limitations despite everyone else knowing full well what you can and can't do

[Anonymous No.]

Patchuria

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552285
She smells bad and will always smell bad until she realizes she needs to move out of the basement with its horrid humidity.

[Anonymous No.]

Patchouli, easily rape-able

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552285
She smells like musty books, sweat, and incense. The best smell.

[White Ren !YLuFFdRcFQ No.]

>>5552285
Patches has a pleasingly feminine scent.

[Kilga M. Aya~n !2BklmILFiE No.]

okay patchy it is time for bed off you go

say good night to all the people patchy

[Anonymous No.]

I wish to smell Patchy's socks.

[Kilga M. Aya~n !2BklmILFiE No.]

no patchy that is not quite what i meant

whatever just go to bed

and learn when a joke has run its course good fucking god

[Anonymous No.]

I have this dream about Patchy where she ties me up naked to her reading chair and uses her feet to play with my penis until its erect. Once that is accomplished, she turns around, lifts her skirt, and sits down on my rigid member. She pays me no mind as she calmly opens up some book and starts reading, once in awhile rocking or grinding on me, using me as a human dildo as she reads some dirty book.

[Anonymous No.]

"Patchy, Patchy~! I want to pla ~ ay ~ !"

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552338

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552338

And you wake up moments before you'd cum?

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552338
Can't say I approve of reactionless sex, but I appreciate the lack of initiative on your part.

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552338
You lucky bastard, I never have any toohoo related dreams.

Instead, I get dreams of me playing a new video game or something similar. Gah, I should really learn how to lucid dream. The past few nights I haven't had a dream at all.

;_;

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552363
You seem to think that a normal human would have a choice in the matter of being used as a human dildo if that Touhou wanted it.

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552377
I dream about touhou related things every night. It can get tedious at times; it's not always pleasant. Like the day before yesterday, I had this dream about saigyou ayakashi being rooted near my hometown, it was pretty scary seeing this giant gnarly dead tree over the rooftops wherever you went.

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552389
All a normal human has to do is brandish his dick (take a moment to imagine this) and all a Touhou's powers disappear.

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552453
Only if your dick is magical and can cum things like blood and sake.

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552467
I don't imagine your dick has to be magical to do that. Only unhealthy.

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552467
You'll be happy to know that all dicks can cum blood if you try hard enough.

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552389
We had this powerlevel discussion before, and Patchy is THE weakest touhou (not counting spells). A human could easily overpower and have his way with her.

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552479
Unzan is less powerful.

[proREMIRIAt Elite Force Commander !rSDMROXTB. No.]

>>5552479
unless she has her spell book at hand, if that's the case, prepare to be royal flare'd.

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552479

She's youkai. Magic is her blood and body.
You fuck with her and you drown in an ocean of flame.

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552509
If magic is her body, does that mean that every time she writes a spellbook she gets a little sicker?

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552569
Patchy's written many spellbooks... ouch. Good thing magician youkai don't starve.

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552377
Touhou characters show up in my dreams pretty regularly. They almost never do anything interesting, though. I did have a dream that essentially tried to tell me that Yukari > Eirin recently.

[Anonymous No.]

Go to a local library.
See this.
What do?

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552922
ask her for book recommendations.

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552797
That dream lied to you. Eirin only lost SSiB because she wasn't properly commanding her troops.

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552984
I haven't read SSiB yet, I hear it is shit and will ruin Marisa for me. Should I bother?

[Anonymous No.]

>>5553001
It's not terrible. Just go into it knowing that it's all a game and nothing serious just like every Touhou game

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552338

If there's a book with a similiar scene, I would buy that book just to read that part. You have awesome dreams anon.

[Anonymous No.]

>>5553001
Heh, its not really important, in fact the details of the story will probably not even come up again in any other canon. Especially now that ZUN as seemingly ended everything to do with Eientei and moved on to other elements that make up Gensyoko.

[Anonymous No.]

>>5553027
CiLR will never be translated... ;;

[Anonymous No.]

>>5553027
Well there still CiLR and the Inaba 4koma that follow up SSiB, but they also pretty much end Eientei importance to the grand scheme of things too.

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552922
Now knowing that she'll probably fucking kill me for seeing her naked, as is the case 90% of the time with Japanese anime/manga media and that she clearly has the capabilities to kill me, I reflexively drop to my hands and knees and genuflect before her with my hands over my head pleading something along the lines of "Please don't kill me Patchouli-sama. It was an accident (etc.).."

...
I then over-politely ask if I can be her slave.

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552922
Now knowing that she'll probably fucking kill me for seeing her naked, as is the case 90% of the time with Japanese anime/manga media and that she clearly has the capabilities to kill me, I reflexively drop to my hands and knees and genuflect before her with my hands over my head pleading something along the lines of "Please don't kill me Patchouli-sama. It was an accident (etc.).."

...
I then politely ask if I can be her slave.

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

Fun to tease

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552301
Until she sets you on fucking fire, slams you with a gust of wind and then shreds every inch of your body with danmaku bullets and spinning saw wheels, that is.

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552301
Until she sets you on fucking fire, slams you up against a wall with a gust of wind and then shreds every inch of your body with danmaku bullets and spinning saw wheels, that is.

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552922

Steal book ans smell it.

[Anonymous No.]

>>5552479

If you think raping a physically weak magicians is easy you are very wrong.

She can likely fry your brain with one word or set you on fire with just a look. Not to mention all the possible passive defense spells, sequencers and reactive magical barriers.

[Anonymous No.]

Do Toohoos masturbate?

[Anonymous No.]

>>5557770
Constantly.

[Anonymous No.]

>>5557770
Of course not. They have no libidos and reproduce asexually. Touhous are also born fully clothed.