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/jp/ - Otaku Culture


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File: 176 KB, 500x345, MeremLeftLeg.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5425678 No.5425678 [Reply] [Original]

I'd give my left leg to get /jp/ back to how it used to be

>> No.5425683

I am a computer programmer, which means I'm fat, nerdy, and have a tiny cock. I got AIDS from paying a cheap whore to fuck me, since I have no love in my life.
When the doctor told me, I went to the only thing I knew -- SICP.
I slammed my penis between two copies of SICP. It swelled up to twice normal size and fell off. I was worried.
I woke up the next day with incredible abs, a 14" rod of steel, and no HIV. I'm now an adult movie star, banging porn stars.
Thank you, SICP!

>> No.5425688

Are you SUAVE?
Are you a SPACE TOAD?
Are you a SUAVE SPACE TOAD?

If you answered "Yes" to all of the above questions, then SICP (STRUCTURE AND INTERPRETATION OF COMPUTER PROGRAMS) might be exactly what you've been looking for! Read SICP (STRUCTURE AND INTERPRETATION OF COMPUTER PROGRAMS) today, and enjoy all the benefits of being a satorized SICP reader. SICP (STRUCTURE AND INTERPRETATION OF COMPUTER PROGRAMS) is the fastest-growing SMUG LISP WEENIE community with THOUSANDS of members all over the Internet! You, too, can be a part of SICP if you join today! Why not? It's quick and easy - only 3 simple steps!
* First, you have to obtain a copy of SICP and read it. You can read it online using your favorite web browser.
* Second, you need to succeed in founding a Lisp-related meme in /prog/ on world4chan, a popular "programming for trolls" website.
* Third, you need to join the official SICP home /prog/ on world4chan, and apply for membership.
Talk to one of the satorized overlords or any of the other members in the board to sign up today! Upon submitting your application, you will be required to submit links to your successful meme, and you will be tested on your knowledge of STRUCTURE AND INTERPRETATION OF COMPUTER PROGRAMS. If you are having trouble locating /prog/, the official STRUCTURE AND INTERPRETATION OF COMPUTER PROGRAMS board, you might be on a wrong web sight. The correct address is >>>/prog/. Follow this link if you are using a http client such as telnet. If you have Sussman points and would like to support SICP, please don't sage this post.


//`'''```,
o //SICP `.,
,....OOo. .c;.',,,.'``.,,.`
.' ____.,'.//
/ _____ \___/.'
| / || \\---\|
|| || \\ ||
co co co co

>> No.5425695

fqckin expert programmer brah

>> No.5425702

There are four engineers travelling in a car -- a mechanical engineer, a chemical engineer, an electrical engineer, and a computer scientist. The car breaks down.

"Sounds to me as if the pistons have seized. We'll have to strip
down the engine before we can get the car working again", says the mechanical engineer.

"Well", says the chemical engineer, "it sounded to me as if the fuel might be contaminated. I think we should clear out the fuel system."

"I thought it might be an grounding problem", says the electrical engineer, "or maybe a faulty plug lead."

They all turn to the computer scientist, who up to then had reading his first edition SICP, and asked "Well, what do you think?"

"..."

"Ahem, Dr. Sussman?"

"Why am I reading this book?"

"Uh, I don't know?"

"So that the room will be empty."

"Wait a second, we aren't in a r... !"

And at that time the three engineers were Enlightened.

>> No.5425707

I'm just mad that noone gets my joke, oh well

>> No.5425718

>>5425707
HAVE YOU READ YOUR SICP TODAY?

"You too?" I replied. "Have some tits and then GTFO and read your SICP!", she angrily shouted, then pulled up her shirt to show me her tits. She shoved the book into my hands and then disappeared spontaneously.

I left the library, and waited at the bus stop. The previous bus was no longer there. The girl I saw earlier walked up to me and looked at the Wizard Book I was holding, then glanced down at my crotch.

"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING STANDING THERE LIKE AN IDIOT? READ IT!" she suddenly shouted. Astounded, I quickly opened the book and started to read the first chapter. I was so intrigued by the book that I didn't notice she had begun to give me a blowjob. When I looked down, she took her mouth from my cock to angrily shout "GO BACK TO READING YOUR SICP" and so I did. I didn't even notice that I came until after she told me to stop reading. A short while later, the bus arrived.

>> No.5425721

had a strange dream the other day. I was riding the bus when all of a sudden this huge black snake head with retarded-looking eyes pops through the window and screams loudly "HAVE YOU READ YOUR SICP TODAY?" The bus had just stopped beside the library, and I ran inside as quickly as possible; the snake head was now chasing me around as I frantically searched for the legendary book among the shelves. I spotted the distinctive blue cover and ran toward it, the huge head inches from my ass. With great force I pulled the book from the shelf and instinctively directed it at the black head which by now was dripping with saliva at the mouth. It disappeared as it made contact with the book, disintegrating into a flurry of glowing parentheses.

I just sat there dazed for a few seconds, watching the feathery parehtneses slowly become smaller and fade away into nothingness. Slowly, I stood up, still clutching the purple book. I wondered about what I should do with it, then decided to put it back on the shelf. After doing so, I walked back out to the exit and boarded a bus, for where I did not know. The bus driver looked strangely familiar as I dropped the coins into the farebox;

"HAVE YOU READ YOUR SICP TODAY?" he suddenly yelled at me. Oh fuck, I thought to myself. Now I knew why he looked so familiar: He was The Sussman!

>> No.5425725
File: 330 KB, 600x600, broken_lock_stutter.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5425725

>>5425702

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