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/jp/ - Otaku Culture

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4964421 No.4964421 [Reply] [Original]

How do you talk to people /jp/? I can never think of anything to say besides "yeah" and "uh-huh". I tried learning from movies, but the characters say things I would never think of.

>> No.4964426

If it's unavoidable I fake being a normalfag.

>> No.4964427

For females, I always try to act like the VN protagonist. cool and somewhat smug.

>> No.4964431

I don't. Except for things like "Good evening" "Thanks" etc. in grocerie stores.

>> No.4964435

I usually only have to say "Yeah." or "Okay."

>> No.4964441

>talk to people

What are you talking about?

>> No.4964447

Never talk about something interesting. This will only confuse normals. Just stick with the same, boring rehashed topics (or tell terrible one liners) and any normal will be satisfied. Also, normals expect constant conversation, so you can't take time to actually put thought and meaning into your statements. Just make obvious observations ("Man it's hot today!", "Damn, I wish it wasn't so cold", "That guy's clothes look like shit", "work sucks", etc.

If the normal is male, sports/cars/politics always work as topics (but never bring logic into politics). If the normal is female, just stick to the basic observations.

>> No.4964453

Don't think what to say OP, just say it.

>> No.4964460

>How do you talk to people /jp/?
I'm completely fine when talking to my family, but any other people (especially my own age) and I get nervous, then start sweating, shaking, and my heart feels like it's about to explode because it's pumping so fast.

>> No.4964463

I don't know, what sort of post do you usually make on /jp/?

>> No.4964465

>>4964460
Same here man. It's really frustrating. Lately I've been getting better with it, though.

>> No.4964477

>>4964465
>>4964460
I kinda feel like being your friend. If only to help you get over that. Well, we're probably in opposite sides of the globe anyways.

>> No.4964480

>>4964447
This sounds like good advice.

>> No.4964487

I usually respond with "... is that so?".

Then people just prattle on with whatever nonsense they were talking about before.
'
Then I eat them

>> No.4964496
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4964496

>> No.4964499

>>4964447
If I make meaningful conversation I get ignored and if I make basic observations I get durr hurr captain obvious responses. What can I do?

>> No.4964505

>>4964487
will you eat us?

>> No.4964517

>>4964463
I discuss visual novels among other topics I could never bring up with strangers.

>> No.4964522

>>4964421
Don't know really, with my girlfriend, every chat goes perfect
With my friends, I just can't seem to come up with anything interesting to talk about, unless I'm drunk.

>> No.4964523

>>4964487
I laughed.

>> No.4964529

>>4964499
That's a tough one. Well, if you're talking to the person you probably have something in common, right? Maybe you're working with them or going to the same classes or waiting for a bus/train or something. You could always try to bridge the gap by pointing out something they'll probably agree with. Maybe try to make it a little less obvious. Also, try talking to older people, younger people tend to have the "I'm better than you and you don't deserve to talk to me" attitude.

>> No.4964533

>>4964522
>with my girlfriend
you lost me

>> No.4964541

Just sucks you can't talk to most people about interesting subjects because they are out of the public spectrum. Doesn't help most people are too stupid to care about though.

>> No.4964547

>>4964499
yell:
I'M NORMAL TOO THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH ME and running away

>> No.4964548

>>4964533
I know, I'm still shocked that I have girlfriend, even though we've been together or 4 months now.

>> No.4964557

>>4964447
This is good advice. The remarkable thing I find when listening to conversations is that people often don't 'converse' but just say whatever is kind of related. The result is that every single thing said is well known to everyone involved and more than often you end up in some kind of general knowledge circle jerk.
The most difficult thing for introverts is to NOT think before talking.

>> No.4964560
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4964560

>>4964522
>girlfriend
>drunk
Who let the normalfag in?

>> No.4964568

I don't usually get out much. It makes me irritated that every time I try to say something that requires some longer explanation I usually get cut off by someone else who barges in with another, unrelated topic in the middle of my sentence. I guess I'm not an interesting person.

>> No.4964570

Stop being fooled into thinking that you have to be the one doing the majority of the talking to be a good conversationalist. Somehow, people think they'll be seen as interesting if they have a lot to say, but that's bullshit. Listening is most important. Inquiring further about things they seem to enjoy talking about. Perhaps commenting once in a while without forcing in your opinion like a douchebag.

If done right, you'll actually get quite a few interesting stories out of the conversation, rather than just wasting your time outputting all information (think about it, there's nothing in it for you if you do all the talking). And if they don't have any good stories to offer, they probably aren't worth your time.

>> No.4964576

Talk about the rape themed eroge you've been playing. Works for me. Talking about traffic and gambling also seems to work.

>> No.4964577

>>4964548
>girlfriend that isn't a waifu
>/jp/
Get out.

>> No.4964587

>>4964576
I wish I had friends I could discuss rape eroge with ;_;

>> No.4964589

>>4964560
Yes, I get drunk every now and then and I also have a girlfriend(And I still don't quite understand why she wants me)
But I'm quite far from anything normal.

>> No.4964592

>>4964587
But, /jp/ is here!.

>> No.4964593

Overall, fuck talking and enjoy your waifu.

>> No.4964598

>>4964587
We're right here.

>> No.4964610

>>4964592
>>4964598
You're not very friendly, though.

>> No.4964612

>>4964610
Shut up. I'm friendly if I say I'm friendly damnit.

>> No.4964617

>>4964589
Do you talk about your /jp/ hobbies with her?

>> No.4964623

>>4964610
/jp/ is actually more friendly than the average normalfag human, sad yet true.

>> No.4964630

You mean like initiating conversation with strangers? I suck at that. I'm only capable of doing so when I'm very drunk.

>> No.4964651
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4964651

>>4964568

Condense your explanations and try to convey it in a interesting layman's way. Like those scientists that people like because they can explain the core behind something without going into the details that confuse someone not knowledgeable about a subject. Watch for visual cues that show signs of people getting bored.

Make sure you speak with a bit of passion and strength and if you get interrupted wait for an opening to politely interject yourself back in and flow the conversation back to where you want it. You gotta be subtle about it or you'll look worse than the other guy.

>> No.4964652

>>4964617
Yeah, I've told her my every weird fetish and hobby.
And I didn't scare her away with this, I realized after this that she's a keeper for sure.

>> No.4964659

>>4964623
It's true. Normalfags are fucking assholes. /jp/ can't compare.

>> No.4964678
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4964678

>>4964460
>>4964465
Phenibut~

Large doses are addictive so be careful

You can thank me later

>> No.4964686

>>4964659
>>4964623
Yup...People tell me I need to be less nice and more assertive blabla. Apparently being a self-absorbed loud-mouthed asshole is what society considers normal these days.

>> No.4964689

>>4964570
Yeah I get this. I have a friend who always has something interesting to talk about, but all I do is laugh, nod, or whatever most of the time; though I like listening to him. Makes me feel kind of bad because I'm afraid he thinks I'm not interested in what he has to say.

>> No.4964695

Why would I want to talk with people I have no business with who don't even share any interests with me?

>> No.4964700

>>4964695
>talking with people I have no business with who don't even share any interests with me
That's society.

>> No.4964710

I've got a good thing going where I pretend to be mute

>> No.4964733
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4964733

>>4964447

Yeah. This is why you're a social retard.

The shallow conversation is just that, a shallow conversation you can have with people you don't know, or don't know well enough. Only a retard would pour his heart out to the first Jane that listens. Only a fool will get into DEEP discussions with people he doesn't know well enough to ascertain their stance on touchy subjects.

The asking obvious question is a topic opener. "Its' hot today" leads to "Yeah I know the weather has be fucked up lately, I just moved from NY so I'm not used to this" "Oh you're from NY? That's cool where in NY are you from..." etc etc.

Talking to guys about sports? Who the fuck knew? Of course you start a conversation with what a person might like. The weather is neutral, most guys follow sports, most chicks follow celebrity news. If you're talking to an older person current events that are NOT related to politics or religion is fine. With classmates talk about class and shit etc etc. Common fucking sense.

@ OP

Wanna learn how to communicate? Look at the above. Start with open questions like how's the weather or stating the obvious. Not the stupid obvious "OH LOOK THE SKY IS BLUE" but the situational obvious "The bus sure is late" .

>> No.4964741

>>4964700
What?
You can always just keep it to yourself. No need to hold conversations with random strangers. If someone really starts talking to you for whatever reason just mutter "Yeah" and "Okay" until they lose interest or you zone out.

>> No.4964742
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4964742

>>4964733

That's how to start a conversation, now to continue it. Jump from related topics to related topics, this is contextual and fairly obvious threads of conversations are easy to spot as long as you don't panic. Ask questions, asking a question is a little hint to the person that its now their turn to speak.

Nod your head and make affirmative noises while actually paying attention, chime in when they leave a long enough pause or when you want clarification (even if you understand perfectly). That helps you steer the conversation, gather info in case you may talk to the person again and shows you actually listen.

Don't interrupt sharply. That's a dick move unless its an argument or its something f pressing importance.

Remember you can always go back to a topic you wanted to talk about more but didn't because the convo moved quickly, simply say "About what you were saying before...."

Also like socially challenged Joe I just quoted above you look at the person and make a quick guess at what they like. Old people, talk about news, girls talk about celebrities, if its a classmate then talk about class etc.

NEVER EVER talk about Politics or religion until you get to know the person.

Thank me, I just made you more of a member of society. Fuck.

>> No.4964759

>>4964710

I pretend to be deaf sometimes. I actually know sign language, which helps.

Actually it hasn't helped yet, but still.

>> No.4964762

>>4964742
Thank you for quoting me and restating everything I just said in two huge posts. That was quite necessary.

>> No.4964773

>>4964759
I once had a conversation with a deaf woman I met on the bus through a notebook.

>> No.4964801

Talking to people is a waste of time. In the end they'll always disappoint you or hurt you in some way. It's better to be alone.

>> No.4964823

>>4964742
Most of it is just taking an interest in the other person. You have to trick yourself into it. Everyone around here has a kind of narcissistic or schizoid personality disorder (commonly known as asbergers) so it makes it kind of difficult. Nobody in the real world ever actually gives a damn about anyone else... it's all temporary and serves to build "connections" (ie jobs, cheap stuff, support) or "territory" (to find sex/relationships or friends).

>> No.4964825

>>4964801
You can leave them alone, but they won't leave you alone.

>> No.4964843

ITT How to Deal with Phonies by H. Caulfield.

>> No.4964860
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4964860

>>4964801
You expect too much from people. I dont do any better in society but at least I know this fact. Nobody ever gives a damn about that guy they just met. Some of you take this personally and get worked up about it when at the same time you probably think the same thing about the other person.

>> No.4964865

>>4964773
How was it?

>> No.4964884

The most fucking annoying is when you get a haircut and the girl keeps trying to talk to you.

Fuck.

>> No.4964885

>>4964762
You are welcome, faggot.

>> No.4964898
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4964898

>>4964884
God I hate that. I've let my hair grow out now for 3+ years for that reason.

>> No.4964918

>>4964884
I had a doctor do this while he was performing surgery on my arm. He commented on how untalkitive I was being and the one time I did laugh at something he said he started laughing too and then all the nurses, they just felt so fake.

>> No.4964927

>>4964898
You can always shave your head. It's a hard thing to do your first time, but you'll never be afraid to do it again and it looks great when you get used to it.

>> No.4964955

>>4964884
Fuck I hate this too. It's always stuff like "are you off work today then?" and I'm just kind of lost for words being a NEET and all.

>> No.4964986

>>4964955
>>"are you off work today then?"

You fags know nothing about lying? On the spot? Its not like you'll meet her again or she'll even remember the conversation when you come for your next cut.

>> No.4964989

I usually discuss anime and videogames with my friends. And if they happen to disagree I call them thudnering faggots, which leads to more swearing and it all ends in laughter. You people seem shut in, maybe you should go out more. Maybe you'd find a nice girl to go out with and have sex and babies.

>> No.4964994

I don't go outside, who am I supposedly talking to?

>> No.4965000

>>4964989
>babies
Oh god no.

>> No.4965010

>>4964989
Why would I have to go out and have sex and make babies? That expectation was perfectly valid four hundred years when out of 10 children 2 would survive, so it was a must that conversation went to sex. But now fuck if I want to pop another baby into the world, the sex is fun though but I got me my hand and porn. Just talk to girls for conversation sake.

>> No.4965013

>>4964989
>babies
I would be a horrible father, I hate kids

>> No.4965017

>>4964986
I'm cannot lie.

>> No.4965021

>>4964994
Bob. From the office down the hall.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OARmqz48Mh0

>> No.4965027

>>4965017
Enjoy being torn apart in the real world. Everyone lies, from the small lies to the great honking fictional tales of heroics. Learn to. Its easy and a useful tool.

>> No.4965028

>>4964986
I don't like lying needlessly. Why should I anyway? I just tell the truth, rather awkwardly.

>> No.4965034

>>4964652
You lucky bastard...

>> No.4965040

>>4965027
I realize this. It's one of the reasons I don't like the real world and have opted to avoid it as much as possible. And I like it this way.

>> No.4965056

>>4965028
What are you? 12? Do you still believe that telling the truth is the best answer? no one is asking you to become a pathological liar but half truths, exaggerations, unstated truths, little lies and quick redirection of the conversation are the grease that make human interaction possible.

The world is built around it so better start constructing that false public image of yours now.

>> No.4965065

Even if you've been alone your whole life, years of reading and watching things should give you enough hints

>> No.4965067

>>4965000
Why not? I bet you would be a great father. I bet anyone on /jp/ would be a great father. Because under that hard crust of loli lover otaku scum, is a cold hearted basterd who is up to the job of being a normal dad.

>> No.4965068

>>4965056
>What are you? 12? Do you still believe that telling the truth is the best answer?
Not at all, it's just that lying bothers me for some reason. Probably because it feels like I have to "change" myself for someone else and pretend to be someone else, not something I'm willing to do.

>> No.4965081
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4965081

>>4965027
>>4965028
I dont have any kind of moral problem against lying but it simplifies your life *a lot* when you don't do it. I'm very bad at lying.

I did however start to realize recently the extent to which everyone else does it.

>> No.4965086

It depends on what kind of mood you want to set.

Say "yeah" if your feeling antisocial or sarcastic.

Say "hello" if you want a positive mood.

>> No.4965087

>>4965056
>no one is asking you to become a pathological liar
>better start constructing that false public image of yours now.
Bother this nonsense.
(not the person you quoted)
I try to avoid lying. Not out of any 'moral' conviction, I'm just bad at it, it just feels uncomfortable. Having to maintain a consistent parallel fake reality sucks balls. Hate that I have to do it for work sometimes.

>> No.4965107

>>4965068
I can't force my view on you but all I can say is changing to fit your surroundings is not a bad thing and is not something to avoid. Flow like water, bend like a sapling etc etc.

My moto is "whatever is practical at that moment, do it". People wonder why I'm so nice and sincere that's because I live by this moto. Be nice to people and they will be nice to you, that's an awesome form of subtle manipulation. Be sincere, that means when you have to lie do it with all your heart so you eventually believe it. That's good thing, lie about being a good chess player, keep living that lie and eventually you'll realize that you've become a good player from pretending to be one for so long.

I didn't think /jp/ had hardcore people with good principles like you, admirable but ultimately useless.

>> No.4965117

>>4965068
No one is every going to accept you for who you are. People judge everyone else by how they make them feel.

You shouldn't need people to validate your strange hobbies. FYI everyone on the planet, even the most "normal" of them, have strange hobbies/habits that they dont tell people about. You know why? Because it makes social interaction a hell of a lot easier. I wont bother you about my strange habits if you dont bother me with yours.

If people ask, tell them, in as few sentences and as tactically as you can manage, but there's no reason to go out of your way to prove your some kind of otaku because all it does is annoy people.

>> No.4965119

>>4965107
Sounds a lot like True Neutral

>> No.4965131

>>4965068

Not the dude you're talking to, but you have two options then: start being more confident and honest in yourself and leave yourself as you are, or change yourself in such a way that you no longer even feel the need to hide the truth, even though you're not ready to take the mental leap towards lying

If someone asks you if you're off work, boisterously claim that you're unemployed. Turn it into a conversation on how the economy sucks and steer the conversation in that direction. The most important thing is to just not look like a pathetic loser tripping over your own words. People like confidence, even if you're a NEET

Or, like I said, the other option is getting off your ass and getting a job and/or education then. You feel the need to hide the truth because on some level you know that society would disapprove of your laziness: the simple solution is to stop being lazy and, by extension, stop being a NEET

>> No.4965133

I tell them what they want to hear when I just want things to go smoothly. I politely tear apart their arguments when they're talking about something stupid. I always feel like I'm putting on an act when I'm talking with most people outside of my close circle of friends.

Basically, I'm normal. But I'm trying to become an eroge protagonist.

>> No.4965137

>>4965107
>Be sincere, that means when you have to lie do it with all your heart so you eventually believe it.
Goddamnit, that's the worst thing ever. If I had moral principles, they would be opposed to that!
Wait I do and they are. Starting with a commitment to authentic reality, or some shit like that.

>> No.4965145
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4965145

>>4965107
>go with the flow
This. It makes life easier. You dont even have to lie all the time to do it. Just accept that the other person is trying to be nice and return the favour.

>> No.4965146

>>4965107
That's a pretty interesting take on it. I can see your point.
>>4965117
>No one is ever going to accept you for who you are.
But I have good friends who do. Friends I can feel comfortable talking to without having to blatantly lie every second sentence.
>If people ask, tell them, in as few sentences and as tactically as you can manage, but there's no reason to go out of your way to prove your some kind of otaku because all it does is annoy people.
That's what I do unless they ask more about my hobbies, which I don't think anyone has yet.

>> No.4965150

>>4965133
>I'm trying to become an eroge protagonist.
Do you know which route you're on?

>> No.4965157
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4965157

>>4965150
Harem End probably

>> No.4965163

>>4965137

You know dude, not for nothing, but you'd be surprised at how effective that philosophy can be in shaping you as a person. Mental reinforcement DOES change you, and it all starts with the lies you tell yourself to reach your goal

>> No.4965171

>>4965163
One can pursue goals for self improvement without self deception.

>> No.4965174

>>4965137
>Starting with a commitment to authentic reality, or some shit like that.

That's cute, the world need more people like. Reality is objective, now tell me how many everyday people give a fuck about facts? Everybody has an agenda, its either you're spinning your brand of reality to sell to someone or someone is feeding you their brand of reality.

Any second hand news source is twisted with someone's agenda even slightly. Every word of mouth story you hear is diluted with someone's outlook. Objective reality is fun but in practical terms none of the stuff you call reality is objective. As far as you're human and ruled by human limits then the stuff you're receiving is not objective.

So use society's relationship with its own brand of reality against it. Wanna make a friend? Make yourself look like a good guy even though you're a flaming douche. Want to intimidate? Make yourself threatening even if you cry at the end of titanic. it helps.

>> No.4965184

/jp/ - semiotics/general

>> No.4965192

>>4965146
>But I have good friends who do. Friends I can feel comfortable talking to without having to blatantly lie every second sentence.

Yeah I meant that most people you "run into" in life don't give a shit. Of course there are true bros in the world but you still have be tactful around random people.

>> No.4965194

>>4965174
Reading this, I sound like a cynic. What I'm getting at is people portray themselves as something to appeal to someone else that's why getting to know a person through conversing, being with them and listening is necessary. No one wants to get hurt, even the ones doing the hurting so its necessary to have safe guards like that and seeing the multiple faces of people (real, fake, in danger, sleepy etc) is the human experience.

>> No.4965195

Sure is insecure in this thread.

>> No.4965203

>>4965174
>stuff about other people's subjective views
Yeah whatever. I was talking about my own subjective views. What I perceive is what I deal with. I do not intentionally distort it to please myself. I try not to bullshit others to please them.

Sometimes being economical with the truth is necessary. This strategy means I have less to say. Oh well. I'd rather stay silent.

>> No.4965220

>>4965171

Calling positive reinforcement deception is a bit silly, dude. Let's look at it this way: yeah, we can go with "reality" and objectively say this, that, and the other thing, but how does that help you? That's what you need to think about: how does THIS outlook on life help ME?

Does it really help you if you just accept that you're a NEET who will probably never amount to anything? It sure as fuck isn't going to change you. So start with positive reinforcement. I know the Orwellian reference isn't really going to help convince you of the value of this skill, but it's a little like Doublethink

I really wish I could explain this better, but I can't. All I'm saying is that sure, you can better yourself without lying to yourself, but I've found that lying to yourself to the point that you BECOME the mask you wear is a very valid and quite rapid way of bettering yourself. All you have to do is pick your mask properly

>> No.4965236

>>4965220
And then you die, and it was all a waste of time and effort.

>> No.4965274

I tend to be decent at normalfagging. My problem is I either mumble or speak too quickly to make myself understood. It's a pain having to repeat a simple phrase because they didn't catch the key words.

>> No.4965298

>>4965220
What self-helpbook did you get that crap from?

>> No.4965302

>>4965298

Don't knock it till you've tried it, bro

>>
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