2hag Thread

[Anonymous No.]

Now including hag-adjacent hus, such as onee-sans and hus with onee-san energy.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44710623
Panties!

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

The Watatsuki sisters are both married and lost their virginities a long time ago and you would never be able to get with them.

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

>>44710723
i wanna pick both the shikigami and her master

[Anonymous No.]

>>44710765
respectable

[Anonymous No.]

>>44710679
Funny you should say that, Toyohime was telling me last night about how long it had been since she felt the touch of a man since all Lunarian men do is sit inside and play Shogi all day.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44710778
Today in things that never happened.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44710778
>how long it had been since she felt the touch of a man
you mean never as no 2hus have felt the touch of a man til they meet you

[Anonymous No.]

>>44710623
didn't we just have one?

[Anonymous No.]

>>44710723
Eirin keeping her cool like "Get your nasty alcoholic arm off of me you dirty ogre."

Anyways, I will pick Yuugi every time.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44710778
>Lunarian men do is sit inside and play Shogi all day.
Holy based, I want to join.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44710723
this is MY kind of hag

[Anonymous No.]

Public nursing handjobs from mom.

[Anonymous No.]

Eirin is the oldest hag, therefore she's the best.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44710778
Toyohime has already had a kid before, you know this right?

[Anonymous No.]

>>44710845
Today's /jp/ has little respect for cooldown periods.
Darn overstimulated youths...

[Anonymous No.]

>>44711412
You could work on your reading comprehension, Anon.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44711637
It doesn't matter. Bitch has already been married and had a kid who her own sister ended up marrying. You're an omega kek for wanting the sloppy fifths of her husband. Even Eirin has a whole lineage on the moon. Lunarian "enjoyers" are fucking delusional lmao.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44711294
Imagine Junko bringing you with her to the monthly mom night and giving you a nursing handjob there while having a casual conversation with Eirin, who is also giving a prostate exam/massage to her sonhusband. Imagine the disapproving and jealous stares from the other momhus.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44711634
2hags need their sleep too..

[Anonymous No.]

I want to fall asleep on Kanako's lap

[Anonymous No.]

>>44710812
Anon... she, her sister, Seiga, Suwako and Junko have already been touched...

[Anonymous No.]

>>44715700
By me

[Anonymous No.]

hags are for charisma break via affection

[Anonymous No.]

>>44711634
Disrespectful brat anons...need hag correction...

[Anonymous No.]

>>44711658
Amazing how every hag thread, without fail, has Yukari seething about the popularity of others.

[Anonymous No.]

I want to see Eirin and Yukari mudwrestling

[Anonymous No.]

>>44715255
Imagine a foursoume or a full mommy/son orgy during that night

[Anonymous No.]

>>44711634
>>44715941
We’re not disrespectful, we’re just eager and pleased to be in the company of such wonderful women!
Not that I’d be averse to being corrected myself which makes me wonder how they’d go about doing so. You just know each hags methods would vary from one another.

>>44716664
I don’t think even a hentai protagonist could survive such a strenuous encounter with these ultra-cougars.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44716830
That's why it's a foursome, they will exchange their sons and take turns so they can last for tons of hours

[Anonymous No.]

>>44716472
Every anti-hag post is Akyuu, she'll never grow old after all.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44716857
Something tells me even with such a system in place those poor boys are in for an exhausting time as they try to sate these ladies thirst.

[Anonymous No.]

What's the verdict on lolibabas like Tewi? I'm sure girls like Cirno who may technically be 60 but are mentally potatoes don't count. But Tewi, though she acts like a cute girl sometimes, it's always an act that hides her sinister slick smooth talking personality, along with the cigars she smokes after a successful scheme

[Anonymous No.]

>>44717042
And that's why you should leave such hard "training" to the milfhus. They can help those boys and you become a man with only a few hours of harsh training.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44710623
I have begun hunting in order to attract Toyo-sama (she digs hunters). What have you hunted thus far to impress the moon princess? So far I started with the usual, deer, rabbits. I plan to hunt dragons and widowed ex-moms by the end of the year.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44717112
They seem to have plenty of experience and they look eager for hands on demonstrations and education. I just hope they’re not “too” rough or eager during instruction. Broken pelvis and exhaustion and all that.
But then again Eirin will likely be there so she can fix that right up.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44717157
>widowed ex-moms
Pls refrain from hurting Junko.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44717181
I claim self defense.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44717157
>What have you hunted thus far to impress the moon princess?
Other MILFs, for starters. I've focused more on being well-read, as well as knowledgeable on quantum mechanics, thus ensuring I'm someone who can actually hold a conversation on such things with her, which is more than can be said for most of Gensokyo and even a large portion of the Lunar Crapital.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44710623
Lol

[Anonymous No.]

>>44717454
>He thinks quantum mechanics will impress a Lunar Lady
Do you also show your skills while courting by reciting the tables of multiplication and singing the itsy bitsy spider?

[Anonymous No.]

>>44717501
>>44716472
>>44711637
>>44710778
Toyohime fucks her rabbit household guards and you can't persuade me otherwise.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44717111
I think Tei is fine to join in on these hag threads as long as she isn't being drawn like a turbo loli. I myself am partial to shortstack big booba Tei. In my headcanon, she has already had plenty of rabbit babies in the distant past so therefore she is a milf (as well as a gilf, technically) and it's fine to draw her with such a body. Pedophiles BTFO.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44717166
Injuring you would be part of the plan. After all, whom better to test the
new pleasure-based treatment on than a patient in agony?

[Anonymous No.]

>>44718581
It’s still kind of a scary prospect getting hurt like that but I guess it comes with the territory of courting these millennium MILFhus.
I just hope it isn’t too painful and Dr. Yagokoro or the others fix me up fast.

[Anonymous No.]

Lunarian "enjoyers" really do like their buckets of water that 1000s of men have been in before them. You know what? I will say it, Yukari is fucking better than them, I will take Yukari any day over these rentawhores from the moon. Her lusty virginal Youkai body is an absolute object of fascination and I will put multiple kids in it after breaking gappy's hymen. Lunarian chumps can have their used goods, I'm gonna focus on being a king with best hag.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44718966
>best hag
The council frowns upon such braggartry, Yukari.
We may very well find ourself in a difficult postition if this continues. We are a 1cc organization after all.

[Anonymous No.]

They say that to this day, Yukari is still seething over how much more appeal the Watatsukis have compared to her. Ironically, her desperation to put others down is ultimately the biggest thing that ensures nobody wants to put up with her. No self-respecting man would put up with her constant complaining about other women, and the handful of men that would are of such low quality that even Yukari wouldn't shag them. Meanwhile the brand spanking new Lunar Colonists are busy making a brand new Japanese Imperial line with the locals.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44719045
Wow look a nephew fucker.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44719026
I rarely see Yuuka included in the hag group. I wonder why that is?

[Anonymous No.]

>>44718966
Merry easily took miles of dick in her university days, and even if the body is new you're still being compared to them

[Anonymous No.]

44711658
lol cuck
every 2hu is non used goods
cept junko and the frog i guess
married ones like the watatsuki you could just say had a political marriage due to being princesses and forget everything else so you have an easier time imagining yourself deflowering them
is it cope?
yeah kinda
but who cares

[Anonymous No.]

all 2hus are used goods
source: me, I had sex with them all

[Anonymous No.]

>>44719223
She actually doesn't go to the meetings unless she's promised good tea and strawberry tarts.
Even then, she makes a big show of not looking like a granny, and telling everyone she's just being "polite" by going when she's invited.
Unlike the rest of them, Yuukarin is a little in denial.
Sure, they might not like it if you called them hags to their faces, but they know it's true.
Yuuka never really interacts with anyone unless she really wants to, so she makes a much less pathetic effort than SOME people at appearing lively and youthful, something she's only half-successful with.
It does not matter to me though, I love her if she's three hundred times my age or only thirty.

[Anonymous No.]

Where does Tojiko stand?

[Anonymous No.]

>>44719305
but one of the watatsuki's is literally married to the son of the other

[Anonymous No.]

>>44719352
And that son is me!

[Anonymous No.]

>>44719337
Yuuka strikes me as someone so inhuman that she doesn't care if she's a hag. The idea of being "older" probably doesn't even occur to her. She's more like nature itself.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44719333
Oh, hello me from the future.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44719385
Oh come on Yukari, that's a new low.
Let me remind you she doesn't even eat people, unlike certain partition pensioners around here.

[Anonymous No.]

What's Eirin like in the sack?

[Anonymous No.]

>>44719408
I like the inhuman aspect of Yuuka. She probably makes fun of the other hags for worrying about being old.

[Anonymous No.]

"Hey! I'm a hag too! So I should be on the council! I'm just as old as Byakuren is and many people look up to me like a mother they never had! If Moriya-sama gets a seat then I shouldn't be excluded either!"

[Anonymous No.]

>>44719352
ok but political
no kiss no contact


i will cope as much as its necessary

[Anonymous No.]

>>44719672
so how did she have a son? are you retarded?
this is why people make fun of muh purityfags

[Anonymous No.]

>>44719683
Childbirth is a source of kegare, AKA impurity, which Lunarians consistently detest, ergo clearly they would've reverted the Watatsukis' bodies to their previous states.

More importantly, I will be giving Yorihime several more nephews for her to molest as a way to blow off steam.

[Anonymous No.]

didnt know the watatsuki had children
read somewhere they were married but also assumed they had some pure lunarian shit

[Anonymous No.]

>>44719724
They're based off the source of the imperial Japanese lineage: Toyotama-hime and Tamayori-Hime. The latter did, in fact, have sex with her nephew, and their son is considered to be the first in the Imperial Japanese line.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44719715
you can't just revert kegare, that's not how it works
if you could do that, reisen wouldn't have spent half her character arc talking about how she was too impure to live on the moon anymore, and seiran wouldn't be worrying about the exact same thing now

[Anonymous No.]

>>44719493
You may sit on the council, but we will not give you the rank of Oba-san.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44719758
uh okay but what about the 2hus
never read the manga so i assumed it was explained there

[Anonymous No.]

>>44719768
Cage In Lunatic Runagate confirms that they're the same as the figures in myth with Eirin's internal monologue, up to and including Yorihime being married to her nephew.

[Anonymous No.]

This is why Fairies will always be better than nasty hags. Fairies are all virginal and waiting to have their maidenhood taken, you don't have to worry about sluttery with Fairies that aren't Star. With a hag you always take a chance at tapping someone else's used goods.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44719910
>Fairies are all virginal
I'm going to have to stop you right there.
Besides, those hags couldn't attract a man who isn't mentally ill in one way or another for all the paedophiles in Rumia's belly.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44719924
My precious Dai-chan has never been touched by anyone before because she's too shy to go around humans. That's why I will slowly get through her barrier of reluctance by treating her nice and being her friend until the hag-fairy wants to at my side more than Cirno's. Yukari and Yuuka drones wish they could get something as good as that! Take that, hagfags.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44719493
Miko's going to change her tune once she finds out the monthly meetup involves binge-watching hallmark movies, sappy romcoms and other such junk that are basically unwatchable to anyone other than True Hags.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44719977
For starters, I bet she'll know something is up.
Faries have an intuition for smelling out lolicons, and ̶r̶a̶p̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶m̶ running away.
Not to mention the fact that your story is a lot like the other fairies', so it looks like they all have some boilerplate cover for explaining how the stereotype of fairies being total rapebait is wrong, and that this one is different.

Hags on the other hand deter any potential mates by being unhinged sociopathic nutcases, who can only attract psycopaths, suicidals and the general mentally ill.
Now if you excuse me, I have a date to catch.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44719924
Whoa!

[Anonymous No.]

Fuck you smelly hags!

[Anonymous No.]

>>44720120
But good sir, what if those hags decide to fuck (You)?

[Anonymous No.]

>>44720024
>hallmark movies, sappy romcoms and other such junk that are basically unwatchable to anyone other than True Hags
translation: unwatchable to anyone other than the insufferably lonely.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44720273
That's the joke.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44719026
Yuukais a sigmahag and doesn't care what the others in her age range do.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44719758
>They're based off
enough for me to separate them and for them to not be the same
nothing in real life says they live in the moon so im assuming they just share the name because creativity
same way suika and kasen have the names of myth oni and such

as such
defloration of moonie stuck up princesses

[Anonymous No.]

>>44720399
>same way kasen and suika have the nameso f mythical oni
kasen and suika, and yuugi as a matter of fact, ARE the mythical oni
we know this because WaHH has oni kasen defeated by the same blade that defeated her in the myths, and suika is called shuten-douji by name multiple times

[Anonymous No.]

>>44720399
This is just sad, NTR-brah.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44720399
Frankly this level of cope is just worse, I'd rather just acknowledge that they're ever-so-slightly used goods than go to these lengths of mental gymnastics to convince myself they aren't who they canonically are.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44720542
It really puts it into perspective just how much the two chilled out. Well, not exactly Kasen, she was more forcibly redeemed. Still, they're a far cry from their legends.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44720969
>ibaraki
>shuten/ibuki
>hoshikuma/hoshiguma
kane, torakuma and kuma when

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

The absolute state of Lunarian "enjoyers".

[Anonymous No.]

>>44720024
I'll have you know the monthly meetup also includes a book club! A club where they provide earth-shattering analysis of masterpiece works that would put any other scholar's work to shame.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44720024

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

>>44721638
The monthly meet up, affectionately known as 'girls night' by the depressed lonely women that attend. Riveting activities are included such as: occupying a bar to drink and hit on younger men, gossip about other women who were not invited to 'girls night', validate each others faults and blame someone or something else for their lack of boyfriends, leer over gaudy or old wives magazines Yukari brought (stole) from the outside, binge on sickening movies and soap operas, and finally end the night with a pillowfight and sleep over because that's what all young girls aspire to do (then regret it in the morning with aching backs and hangovers).

[Anonymous No.]

>>44721972
Look at them. those young ladies..

[Anonymous No.]

>>44710778
https://youtu.be/3zGwKoHNl8k?si=KfUi1WHyDdtIHIAu

[Anonymous No.]

>>44716857
https://youtu.be/k9p4B6s0j4U?si=mmNAB4pqLBxMW2mS

[Anonymous No.]

>>44717454
https://youtu.be/UOV3pBYpkdM?si=rKUJyYwEuko8XdVE

[Anonymous No.]

>>44718966
Aren't you supposed to be hibernating, Yukari?

[Anonymous No.]

https://youtu.be/ctLu5k58m3U?si=vbquNVKCnM4dS18Z

[Anonymous No.]

>Mother to an entire dimension
>not brought up in either this thread nor the previous one
I'm disappointed in you guys!

[Anonymous No.]

Who is the dorkiest hag?
I want the dorkiest one and make her happy

[Anonymous No.]

>>44722791
She is THE forbidden/secret hag so it shouldn’t come as a surprise that her presence isn’t on the same level as the others. Makai mom should be cherished though.

>>44724935
Probably Kanako with how often she gets memed on about it.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44722791
She's too peak so posting her would be unfair towards the others anon...

[Anonymous No.]

>>44722791
The few times Shinki does attend the hag meetings, she can't stop herself from rambling about her daughters and thus ends up annoying the other ladies in the meeting. And that takes skill.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44726805
Oh to be a fly on the wall when Shinki comes in to mog the spinsters with veiled references about how much sex she had.

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

>>44726827

[Anonymous No.]

>>44727325
S-she has really pretty ears...

[Anonymous No.]

>>44730709
And pretty hair. And pretty eyes. And pretty clothes. And pretty legs. And a fantastic rack.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44731007
Yes, but I can't let her know, I don't want to turn into a tengus pe

[Anonymous No.]

>>44731374
Did… did anon just get kidnapped?

[Anonymous No.]

>>44731489
What a horrible fate, being kidnapped and used as a body pillow by some lonely, smug hag. Anons should watch themselves so the same doesn't happen to them.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44731895
Ha ha yeah, I sure hope something awful like that doesn’t happen to me, especially if it’s that OLD LADY Yukari.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44731895
It could always be worse. He could have ended up in a situation where he's the only eligible bachelor in Gensokyo, ensuring the various hags come into a cold war in their efforts to court him, slowly escalating to molestations, outright abductions, and even Incidents occurring in the wake of a human male not being immediately put off by their behaviors.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44732043
I could see it, Anon is the only male working at the venue they have their little event at during the nights and is amicable enough to enjoy his conversations with them.
Thus began the 'horny hags' incident. Only barely put down by the Mikos in time before it wound up reducing Gensokyo to a desolate wasteland. None of the hags scored.

[Anonymous No.]

omg

[Anonymous No.]

>>44731489
>>44731895
How rude! Tengu would never resort to such lowly acts!
Especially Megumu, she is super cool and amazing!
Like it or not, Tengu are simply superior to humans and youkai
Please be more considerate in the future

[Anonymous No.]

>>44738155
I don’t know man, I might not know everything there is to Japanese legends or Touhou but I do know that tengus are notorious for kidnapping people when the urge strikes them. And given how our dear departed friend has yet to let us know of his fate, he seems to remain kidnapped.
You’re shilling pretty hard for tengu and Megumu in particular come to think of it. Am I talking with another person or perhaps the daitengu or even her tube fox accomplice?

[Anonymous No.]

I want you to understand something. To a Tengu, a human like you is the equivalent of a rat that lives in a dumpster. There's no way Megumu would find you endearing, or want to cuddle you after kidnapping you or more dramatically, want to feel your penis inside her most private and holy of places. Because again, to a Tengu a human doing all this would be the same as a human just up and deciding to lick all over a diseased rat that lives in a dumpster.

Megumu would NEVER do this.

[Anonymous No.]

I like when Tengu trash talk me

[Anonymous No.]

>>44739169
it's nice

[Anonymous No.]

Guys help, Megumu looked really scary just now and said something about "setting a new record"
She spent all day writing names in a notebook and now she's off to get some kind of medicine from Eirin.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44739133
Shut up tube fox.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44739284
i can't imagine that such a fertile, nubile, flexible, youthful, energetic, and marriageable young girl would post here amongst the barren, desiccated husks

[Anonymous No.]

>>44739311
Words like that get pipe foxes stuffed into the sewer pipes! And then the entrance sealed up!

[Anonymous No.]

>>44736134
What is that?

[Anonymous No.]

Most touhous are alcoholics.
They're mostly shown drinking sake.
Do you think they have other traditional Japanese drinks like shōchū, awamori and umeshu.
I know Remilia has red wine too.
I'm sure they would love beer, whisky, vodka and other liquors and alcohol.
But I don't remember any of those showing up.

[Anonymous No.]

I refuse to fall to hag propaganda

[Anonymous No.]

Megumu will not fuck you.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44739709
You are not immune to propaganda.

[Anonymous No.]

Megumu would kill you.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44740009
Worth it.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44740009
She's that pent-up?! What a woman.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44739791
>>44740009
Tube fox this is your last fucking chance to stop shitposting on Megumu's behalf, last fucking chance.

[Anonymous No.]

Does she count?
Response urgent, this information could prove me innocent.

[Anonymous No.]

Megumu would torture your genitals.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44740066
Hag, much like MILF, is more of a body type than anything actually age related. Suika does not meet those requirements.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44740080
a bit rude, really

[Anonymous No.]

>>44740080
And I would torture hers.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44739999
Yukari would murder you, she's a mean hag that only cares about herself

[Anonymous No.]

Yukari would demand many, many children from you

[Anonymous No.]

>>44740066
Suika lacks both the body and the attitude.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44740278
>>44740106
Yukari is a dork

[Anonymous No.]

You expect me to get aroused by... THIS?

[Anonymous No.]

>>44740385
Anon this is a blue board!

[Anonymous No.]

>>44740385
Ew! Saggy old hag! Stop trying to seduce me with your wrinkly body!

[Anonymous No.]

You would never impregnate Megumu

[Anonymous No.]

>>44740532
So you say, but Eientei's medical reports note that the Daitengu starts ovulating the moment she so much as holds hands with a man.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44740436
Purple Board.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44740385
Damnit yukari this is a CLEAR violation of section 8 of the agreement YOU drafted!
Now look! Everyone is going down to your level now!
Have you no shame?!?!?

[Anonymous No.]

>>44740581
I want to get purple’d by Yukari-sama.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44740576
How did you get your hands on such a report?

[Anonymous No.]

>>44740724
Certain individuals in the Bamboo Forest of the Lost are willing to do quite a lot if you have enough to pay them with.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44740581
She is such a cute dork

[Anonymous No.]

Megumu will not make you her human pet, she would be exiled by Lord Tenma for disrespecting Tengu culture by consorting with a dirty human.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44741081
Surely Lord Tenma would have more honor than to exile the Daitengu just to steal her husband!

[Anonymous No.]

What would happen if you just walked up to a 2hu and pulled out your penis and looked at them and say "Well? what are you going to do about this?"

[Anonymous No.]

>>44741332
Probably scream as she ripped/sliced it off for being a weirdo who takes their cock out in public.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44741457
So she would touch my penis?
Nice!

[Anonymous No.]

I just want a hag to hug me. Would they be fine with me asking for one?

[Anonymous No.]

>>44741522
Kanako is the best bet for that, or Byakuren if you count her. Both are more than magnanimous enough to agree, but not so desperately clingy that you won't get the chance to break off the hug once it's begun.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44741538
Who is the clingiest hag?

[Anonymous No.]

M-Miss Byakuren please stop trying to reach inside my pants, this is not right conduct for interacting with your students...

[Anonymous No.]

>>44741943
Yukari. You cannot leave her. She is desperate and has a too convenient power for permanent kidnapping.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44741943
>>44742169
Not entirely true anymore. She has been replaced by the grapehag who's power is exactly that.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44741943
A tie between auntie Elly after a few too many ciders, Yuyuko when she's ran out of food, Letty at the end of winter, and just plain old Junko.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44742220
19slop

[Anonymous No.]

>>44741538
The problem with hugging Kanako is that while she still has enough self control to let you go, the tears welling up in her eyes are going to convince you to keep hugging her anyway.

[Anonymous No.]

Okay I'll be truthful, Megumu would be a lot worse than if she just rejected you. She would rape you daily and never allow you to leave her home again. Your every move would be known to her and eventually the pleasure she bestows your penis with would become pain from the constant milking. She would also get pregnant and leave the kids with you, forcing you to raise them. She would be mean and constantly look down upon your humanity. You don't want that to be you. You don't want to get with Megumu.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44741943
Definitely Yukari at the top, with Byakuren being a close second, although she has enough restraint normally to not be overt about it. Eirin is third, given how she treats Kaguya, her treatment of an actual lover would be even more obsessively overprotective. Except any woman who displays interest in you to end up with an arrow between their eyes.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44742169
>>44742595
Would Yukari die if I showered her with affection?
Overstimulated, so to speak

[Anonymous No.]

>>44742659
It would be extremely awkward.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44742595
Are we just going to forget about the least mentally adjusted of them all?

You just know she'd kidnap you without a care in the world

[Anonymous No.]

>>44742685
Seiga is a lot more carefree than Yukari, not to mention Byakuren's Dream Self talks about implanting remote bombs into peoples' heads before requesting that she not be left.

I won't deny Seiga wouldn't be above abduction as an idea of a date, but she's much less likely to be prone to paranoid tendencies like the three mentioned.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44742685
>least mentally adjusted

[Anonymous No.]

>>44742595
Telling Byakuren I only see her as a spiritual mentor!

[Anonymous No.]

>>44742773
Good luck explaining to Shou why Hijirin hasn't shown up for sermons for the past week, not to mention her ordering gallons of ice cream from the human village.

[Anonymous No.]

>How many children do you want

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743368
Zero!

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743368
she's actually just telling you how many times she's going to give you mind blowing prostate massages today

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743368
triple digits

[Anonymous No.]

>>44742676
For you.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743259
She should meditate with Byakuren and help her see why her behavior is unbecoming of a living saint!

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743419
rookie numbers

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743523
Well, I guess it was only a matter of time.
We had a good second run guys.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743368
you've killed the thread you motherfucker

[Anonymous No.]

Ran is pretty!

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743589
Does she have a dusty, millennial, unused womb?
If not, she gets no seat on the Hag Council.

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

Do not respond, do not acknowledge.

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743405
What is it with foxfuckers and wanting things in their ass?

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743589
Sauce?

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743653
She became the prostatehu

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

The lolibaba

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743748
Suwako is not invited to the hag club...

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743656
Ran Yakumo from Touhou.

Remember, Ran says it's important to stay in shape, no matter what age!

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743624
No, it's over. He's gonna sink the thread like he did the tsukasa one.
At this rate the only way to for sure get rid of the nigger is to explicitly tell him to fuck off in the OP.

[Anonymous No.]

Fitness is important!

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743782
that doesn't work either
if he gets wind of a certain thread, that's it
you can't stop him, you can't deter him, and you sure as hell can't get him banned
I'd love to hear his justification for this thread, since ran is neither in the OP nor the focus of the thread

[Anonymous No.]

The Yakumos are a good family.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743815
This pedophile used to be either a mod or janny so he gets overlooked when he shits up threads, don't count on anything working.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743368
Is Ran really a hag? I thought of her more as a middle aged mom fox than a grandma.

[Anonymous No.]

No off topic schizo shitposting people. Carry on posting Ran and the others.

[Anonymous No.]

I'm starting to think it might even be a bot, cause some of his replies are canned and reused, not to mention fucking deranged most of the time.
Reminds me of sallyfag. Haven't seen his particular brand of spam in a while.

[Anonymous No.]

It's so cool this pedophile faggot can shit up and spam any thread he wants and mods don't give damn because they're probably butt buddies with each other.

[Anonymous No.]

Top heavy fox.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743872
He's not a bot as he's responded to the few times people have bothered replying to him, just a deranged pedo.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743872
too much malice for a bot. just a dull, repetitive mind

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743879
I once tried just insulting his crackwhore wife, but it didn't do anything except give me a kek or two.
Seriously though, how in the hell does he get away with this, he's the only guy to manage to consistantly derail any thread he shows his troon head in.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743879
4chan mods have discord where they act like beevis and butthead all day and even dox user IPs that upset them while coordinating shitposts for giggles, so yeah. Everything went to complete shit when Moot left. Even Swaglord turned into a trooned bitch.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743900
Also reminder that he ever so slightly edits his images so that he can bypass people trying to use the image MD5 to filter him

[Anonymous No.]

Family is important. The Yakumos are a great family.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743914
Well, there's only one thing left to do.
And that is sink the thread with imagedumps out of spite.
Gentlemen, post your hag wives. It's all we have.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743928

[Anonymous No.]

The Yakumos on the town!

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743928
Two of them in one picture.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743928
Fair enough let's get this thread to bump limit as unfortunate as it is

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743939

[Anonymous No.]

Ran is a computer.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743928
May as well

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743948
Sometimes, you gotta cut a finger off to save your arm.
At the very least we can admire a collection that all of gensokyo would quake at, together before he ruins it totally.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743852
cool story bro

[Anonymous No.]

The holidays can't come soon enough!

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743959
Least we could do is enjoy our hag wives even while their thread is in tatters

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743991
By sinking it, we make sure it is us who are sinking it and not a deranged pedo probably-a-furry.
If nothing else, at least the sinking is our own.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44744018
can you please refresh the page

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743928
Cheers.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44744021
Ok.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44744021
>>44744037
He's like the terminator, you can't stop him.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44744021
Mods remove a small bit of his spam and he goes back to shitting up the place as per usual. He is a chronic ban evader anyways

[Anonymous No.]

>>44744031
Medium boob yuukarin is an underappreciated gem.

[Anonymous No.]

Remember Anons, r&I does work you simply have to be consistent

Now then, Kasen: hag or nee-san?

[Anonymous No.]

If you think about it, Yukari being a lonely old woman with a large pet closely related to canines is always going to be suspicious.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743856
>thought of her more as a middle aged mom
yeah if i was to compare her to human id say she's probably more within the christmas cake range so anywhere from 26-30

Yukari on the other hand gives me that sexually frustrated woman past her prime vibe, so one in her thirties
Jp standards of course

but they're both 1k+ so Ran does count as a hag at least physically
still very fertile, she'd probably give birth in litters like any fox

[Anonymous No.]

>>44744255
Why not both: Aunts

[Anonymous No.]

>>44744255
kasen exudes pure aunt energy
she'd try and set you up with her neice reimu no matter how hard you tried to make it clear that it was her you wanted all along

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743752
Why do you think so? She may be small but she definitely carries herself with hag energy
Also she's on the same club as Junko and the Watatsukis as a momhu

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743856
>>44744378
She's in the territory but I wouldn't call Ran a "True Hag". She fits the bill of an old maid or housewife, but isn't nearly as lonely or desperate as Yukari and the others. Still old enough to get blindsighted by someone interested.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44744540
>isn't nearly as lonely or desperate as Yukari and the others
May sound mean
but to me it looks like the kind of woman who is desperate but also has given up and doesn't want to be seen as desperate for a couple so she pretends to not actually care by keeping herself busy with getting cats (which is literal in her case)

though chen is more like a surrogate daughter so its not like your average cat collecting lady

[Anonymous No.]

>>44744577
>the kind of woman who is desperate but also has given up
I can see that, but I think it's more of the case Ran doesn't have the time to mull over loneliness as she has her hands full.
The difference between Ran and Yukari is that Ran's relationship with Chen is akin to family given that they're both shikigami and animal youkai. Yukari's relationship with Ran and Chen on the otherhand is distinctly master/servant, and she is well into the cat (and fox) collecting lady category. You can see this with other hags as well; it can be debatable, but they don't have very good close relationships and there's some distance in them.

[Anonymous No.]

i would be happy adopting chen as my daughter if i get to bang and marry both her masters

[Anonymous No.]

>>44744838
The ideal mayohiga experience

[Anonymous No.]

>>44744879
Unlike Yukari here, her glorious expression will never get old. Happy birthday gap grandma!

[Anonymous No.]

So would Ran accept being called mommy?

[Anonymous No.]

>>44745184
eh, probably

[Anonymous No.]

>>44745184
Too a degree this could be true for all hags, though you might give Kanako a heart attack.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44744255
I love this preachy bitch like you wouldn't even imagine.

[Anonymous No.]

Yukari: The autistic gappy would be pretty unfit for being a mother, and probably wouldn't be very keen on having children at first. But with enough cuddling and pampering, you can convince her to change her mind. Gap youkais give birth in litters, so a minute of silence for Reimu.

Yuyuko: Delighted with the idea of having children and giving Youmu sisters, but she would be slightly put off when realizing how much her belly's gonna swell when she's pregnant. However, she instantly cheers up when realizing she's gonna get to eat twice as much every day! One of the easier hags to have children with.

Eirin: Wouldn't be unwelcoming of the idea of getting pregnant, and she knows how to keep her baby healthy. Most of the parenting's gonna be done by you and Reisen though, as Eirin is cold and busy with work. Don't leave Tewi and the baby alone in the same room.

Kanako: Somewhat experienced with raising children, but shy about the whole ordeal. Like Yuyuko, she's gonna be very self-conscious of her stretch marks and darkened nipples. Don't forget about the frog's relentless teasing on Kanako. I believe she will feel a massive surge of genuine happiness when she sees her child for the first

Byakuren: She's gonna be the one asking for a child. Byakuren is one of the most motherly 2hags, and she firmly believes that having a baby with a (You), a human male, will skyrocket human-youkai relationship acceptance rates in Gensokyo. Also, Byak strikes me as someone who will proudly breastfeed in public.

Junko: Reluctant since it reminds her of her late son, but with enough love, care, and reassurance, you'll be able to fill the missing hole in her heart by filling the hole in her womb.

Yuuka: ???

[Anonymous No.]

>>44745255
The shrewish behavior definitely is endearing if you understand it's coming from a good place. That, and the charisma break if/when you decide to do something suicidally reckless. Part of me wants to see Kasen on the verge of tears out of worry.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44745377
Kasen made me realize that I like moralistic women which scold me to no end because they truly care about me.

>>44745269
How about Kasen?

[Anonymous No.]

Mornin'

[Anonymous No.]

>>44745269
Yukari and Kanako truly are the best, but Byakuren seems pretty good too now
Also if Tewi so much as touches my kid I will shove my hand so far up her ass I'll be using her as a sock puppet

[Anonymous No.]

>>44745269
>Yuuka: ???

She'd have to have her pride broken down a bit first, Yuukarins are as autistic as Yukarins, but she put her skill points into other fields, no pun intended.
Expect bitchface for a while, and her violence to be more sporadic and random with all the hormones.
Once you have one though, she'd want more.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44745269
>Also, Byak strikes me as someone who will proudly breastfeed in public.
Extremely accurate. Junko would also do that, but she wouldn't think that there's anything unusual about it.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44745269
You think Yukari would cry when she cant hold all her babies at once?

[Anonymous No.]

If you stay with your hag long enough, the age difference will be insignificant!

[Anonymous No.]

>>44748243
How many millenniums do I have to stay with my hag wife for a 2000 years age gap to seem insignificant?

[Anonymous No.]

Can stinkhus be Onee-sans too?

[Anonymous No.]

>>44743752
She mentioned one too many times how she gets laid regularly.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44748435
They sure can.

[Anonymous No.]

There has been scant mention of the Ghost Princess in either thread, and much attention paid to her spergy friend.
This must be rectified ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶ ̶n̶e̶t̶h̶e̶r̶w̶o̶l̶d̶ ̶p̶a̶i̶z̶u̶r̶i̶ with love and affection!

[Anonymous No.]

>>44748805
She's not the only neglected PCB hag either.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44748805
I am of the belief that Yuyuko never wears pantsu.
That dress can hide a lot, and if Youmu ever found out she'd brush it off with some bullshit like "Oh but the weather is so hot" and "But I don't want you seeing them in the wash" to cover up the fact that she just doesn't like wearing anything other than her kimono and hat for Youmu and Yukari's sake.
Were they not a factor, she'd be a full on nudist.
Imagine the ̶s̶m̶e̶l̶l̶ sight.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44748900
She's a traditional gal and you don't wear underwear underneath a kimono! It's normal not lewd!

[Anonymous No.]

>>44748909
Looks like Yuyu and China have something in common!

[Anonymous No.]

Is Keiki part of the hag group ?

[Anonymous No.]

>>44749171
Keiki is a certified hag in every way

[Anonymous No.]

>>44749171
Too young to be sexually frustrated yet.
She has the body, and in a few hundred years the mindset will kick in, but right now she has her whole future ahead of her, and no history of failing to get with a man, any man to dwell and seethe over.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44749218
But anon, she already has heavy and misguided maternal instinct not to mention a huge failure on her track record.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44749548
Just slap her with a dead-end job as an arts and crafts teacher at an Keine's school, and you've got yourself a woman with overflowing hag energy.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44749624
How am I supposed to focus on my assignment when the arts & crafts teacher looks like that?

[Anonymous No.]

>>44749968
Don't worry about it. I reckon she's gonna pull the good old english teacher's gambit, i.e. get pregnant in the middle of the semester for that sweet, sweet paid maternity leave.

[Anonymous No.]

why is she like this

[Anonymous No.]

>>44750575
Toyo was always cute. Her first appearance has her trying to reach peaches with two fans and not succeeding.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44750575
imagine defiling these so called super pure lunar princesses having them willingly bear your children despite going over how impure earthlings are

[Anonymous No.]

>>44750644
The number of raceplay fetishists amongst the Lunarians is really quite impressive.

[Anonymous No.]

>hag thread
>0 (zero) images of the two literal mountain hags in the franchise

[Anonymous No.]

>>44750760
Yori did marry her nephew so she probably does care about purity and such.
Toyo, on the contrary, fucked, bore children and married some hunter looking for his brother's hook.
So there's that.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44750828
So what you're telling me is that if I show up with a .375 H&H, she'll cream herself from excitement?
Hot dog!

[Anonymous No.]

>>44750828
>"Hey pretty lady, you wouldn't happen to have seen a hoo-"
>"Shut the FUCK up and come here! Soil my pure virginal body with your dirty, impure seed you hairless earth primate! I want you to look at the gods in the eyes as you defile their perfect creation! Laugh in all their faces as you put a baby - a FILTHY halfbreed - in my sacred womb! Make them watch in horror as I willingly forsake my every vow all for just some earthling!"
>"But my hook though..."
He did not find his brother's hook.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44751022
No hook, maybe, but he got a great catch all the same.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44751022
How would the other Lunarians and Daddy Ryujiin react to Toyohime bringing home her earth bf?

[Anonymous No.]

>>44751048
She practically wears the symbol of Venus as a belt buckle, yet more proof Toyo is PURE, REFINED sexxo.

[Anonymous No.]

The thread is being infiltrated by moonies and the hags are too distracted to do something about it!

[Anonymous No.]

>>44750794
They aren't drawn with the body type. Or drawn at all, really.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44751185
The hags are still dealing with the hangover from last night's movie-thon

[Anonymous No.]

>>44751123
It's not just outfit design, we have to factor in personality as well. Her easygoing, playful and warm demeanor marks her as one of the most approachable people in the setting. Not to mention it only makes the notion of spoiling her rotten ever more appealing.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44751185
The premier moon remover Junko is currently occupied with completely unrelated prior engagements that were in no way a Lunarian plot to distract her, and she is thus too busy to deal with the infestation as of now.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44751246
Damn... red wine drunk... what do we do now?

[Anonymous No.]

>>44751318
You there.
Whatever you are about to say, don't say it.
We all know you'll regret it when they wake up and find out what you did, so don't do it.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44751330
>We all know you'll regret it when they wake up
Yeah, reaaaally gonna regret it come 6 past noon.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44751330
It's okay, I just want to give drunk Junko some water and a blanket if she's still feeling sleepy. I'll even cook her a nice, hearty meal when she wakes up!

[Anonymous No.]

>>44748938
Never stop anon, I love Scottish Meiling

[Anonymous No.]

>>44751185
Aren’t moonies like Eirin or the Watatsuki sisters hags themselves?
And this pic has me thinking, which hags would be the most likely to hit on or try to get together with doomguy if he were to come to gensokyo?

>>44751408
That’s one slinky Satori.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44751707
NMDG (Not My Doom Guy)
Probably Iku or someone, as far away from hellspawn as you can get.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44751748
There is a charm that the original/old doomguy has over the slayer iteration.
Celestials like her would make sense though being divine and all. And it goes without saying he’d murder the infernal or things like them without fail so no Hecatia.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44751822
I agree, although I think it's based in ID's choice to make him just some space marine with a mission rather than a demigod given a divine mandate.
Something something, they don't make em like they used to, something something, good game design etc.

I said Iku, but actually Reisen might work as well.
Moonies aren't really youkai, and the rabbits are only in the touhou sense of "not a normal human", so with his affinity for rabbits, and shared experiences as a space soldier, they might get on fine.
Or not, the guy killed Baphomet because he felt like it, we can't really understand what those heroes of the ancient 90's were thinking, their wisdom and bravado has been lost to the ages.

[Anonymous No.]

Side track, but which hu is a cake?
Past her prime, but not quite a hag. Definitely a virgin.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44752002
Her.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44752048
She's probably the opposite problem, men feel to intimidated to approach her

[Anonymous No.]

>>44752002
Keine
Ran
Heca
Yuugi (?)
Maybe kagerou
Keiki
Komachi


Yuuka depending on who you ask, same for Kasen
Megumu maybe

Out of these Keine and Ran are the only ones that give off a vibe of "desperate for a man but trying to hide it"

[Anonymous No.]

>>44752141
I suppose you'd have to tier them between hags who act young and yungun's who act old.
Yuuka is by every right a hag, but because she's Yuuka somehow it's not the same as Yukari.
Keine is far younger, but somehow exudes a kind of restrained horniness from being a teacher.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44751934
The mission stays the same with our favorite demon destroying marine, be it a plain Jane human or an enhanced demigod. He works off of his own pro-human mandates.
But I digress and we are admittedly getting off thread topic.
Reisen is a no brainer too since she’s a bunny and all but she ain’t no hag herself. Tewi might be one but she’s too young looking. Doomguy would still want to meet with the rabbits of Eientei/Bamboo Forest of the Lost which could very well lead him to meeting Eirin. He’d definitely bond over with Reisen for being a trooper as well.
And to be fair, he fragged the Icon of Sin to stop the demonic invasion of Earth and save his people from death and damnation.

[Anonymous No.]

how many children

[Anonymous No.]

>>44752452
2+5

[Anonymous No.]

>>44752141
I feel like Yuugi wasn't at her inception but the bit of development and an outfit change she got in recent years changed that. She went from someone who felt like the local deadbeat alcoholic to being a respectable business owner. Did she even own the onsen back when she first appeared or did she come into that later?

[Anonymous No.]

>>44752508
I think the onsen was in 17.5
Sidenote; Her stage theme is one of the very best. Stage 3 themes are always good.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44752555
Yuugi is my favorite but funny enough, I never cared much for her theme.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44752141
scratch that, Heca is probably just as desperate to get a boyfriend as the other ones here, though probably not as bad as iku

She probably wears those silly clothes because she thinks she looks like a trendy city girl and would have a better chance of striking a boyfriend because she thinks it makes her look cool. not aware the human outsider she has her eye on actually knows what a city girl is like and that she just looks like a country bumpkin (which is cute)

[Anonymous No.]

>>44752662
The other gods laugh at her because she's the only one who can't seduce mortals! What an idiot!

[Anonymous No.]

>>44752141
Christmas cake Kagerou is something I never thought about but could definitely get behind.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44752692
She's on the verge
Maybe not the feeling of a woman past her prime like Ran but definitely approaching it, like keine

And out of all of them probably the most desperate one, second only to iku maybe

[Anonymous No.]

>>44751707
>>44751748
>>44751934
How about other boomer shooter protags? Which 2hu would be most likely to hit on Gordon Freeman, Duke Nukem or Blazkowicz?

[Anonymous No.]

>>44752994
Almost related, but i have this.
Feast ye eyes upon it, & despair!

[Anonymous No.]

>>44752994
For Gordon I could see touhous that could admire the strong yet silent type as well as those who are STEM inclined. So that would probably be kappas, Moriya Shrine gods, as well as Okuu since she’s all about nuclear energy and physics and they can bond over that since Freeman’s got a PhD in theoretical physics. Assuming Alyx doesn’t cockblock him.
Or the G-Man for that matter who may draw the attention of Yukari considering they have some similarities to each other. Which may also have the gap hag hit on Gordon if only to see his “employer’s” reaction to it while also possibly being intrigued that an ordinary man has such a powerful “guardian” working with him.
The Duke would probably vibe with onis considering how bombastic and brazenly confident he is. And assuming he doesn’t get shitfaced off of drinking a tallboy, he’d be down to booze it up with the likes of Suika or Yuugi. Might try to arm wrestle with them too and likely lose. Otherwise I can see him trying to hit on any Gensokyo chick he comes across with varying results.
Blazko I’m less sure about. So long as they aren’t Nazis or similar to them, he’d probably get along well enough with any that hit on him. Although he’d also likely brush them off since he’s with Anya.

>>44753006
Lmao what an oddly specific crossover crackship.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44753127
>So long as they aren’t Nazis or similar to them
So no Lunarians then.

[Anonymous No.]

I will not have sex with Toyohime. I will not touch a married woman.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44753250
Probably not. But then again the moonies hate Earthlings like BJ so the animosity is mutual.
Nobody tell the Lunarians Blazko’s been to their precious moon either. Or that the Nazis have a base on its surface.

[Anonymous No.]

I will have sex with Toyohime. I will help the widow create a new imperial bloodline.

[Anonymous No.]

I can be either having sex with Toyohime or not having sex until observed. She can be either married or not until observed.

[Anonymous No.]

I will leave a half breed heir for both toyohime and yorihime
Wether they're married or not in this timeline may or may not matter

[Anonymous No.]

Yuuka is usually my #3 2hu behind Ran and Yukari but these past few days I've been feeling in a sunflower mood

How many children would she demand

[Anonymous No.]

>>44752508
>respectable
Oni aren't respectable and neither are women who show as much skin as her.

[Anonymous No.]

Yukari would eat you. She would never love you, you're just food to her like you are to all Youkai.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44753518
There there, Akyuu. I'm sure you'll find a boyfriend one day.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44753516
Respectable by oni standards. Most of them just sit around getting drunk all day and collecting welfare checks from hell.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44753500
She's too proud and independant to ever directly ask, but she'll subconciously think about children a lot, "accidentally" make a nursery in one of the empty rooms of Mugenkan, ask Kurumi or Muge offhandedly if either of them want a sister (figure(?)) and then one day it'll just happen, where she'll pretend she didn't ever want any but is actually overjoyed.

You will end up with six.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44753500
She seems like the type who would have a kid because she likes the idea of it but hand them off to one of her minions to raise because being an active mother would get in the way of her lifestyle.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44753590
cue Yuuka being annoyed that kids need more than water, food, and sunlight to survive

[Anonymous No.]

>>44753606
She'd visit the baby every now and then but quickly leave once its behavior starts putting her off. She'd probably come around more often when the kid is able to speak but still won't stay for very long because kids are still kind of annoying. The minion raising the child would have to be very careful to raise it to be courteous and polite, lest Yuuka get annoyed with the entire prospect of motherhood and just kill the child.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44753641
>lest Yuuka get annoyed with the entire prospect of motherhood and just kill the child.
As her husband, I'll make sure to protect our child by correcting Yuuka with lots of lovey-dovey sex

[Anonymous No.]

>>44753690
Don't do that, she'll start getting pavlov'd into thinking that getting annoyed = horny and start solving any domestic dispute by amazon positioning you.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44753690
Why do that when you could turn the kid into a future protagonist by dropping them off in the human village for someone else to raise with only vague hints of their heritage left behind for them?

[Anonymous No.]

she strikes me as someone who due to always being a loner in the garden of the sun, after you get past her cold demeanor she'd just melt in your arms every day when there's nobody else watching

As well as the impatient type, once you start dating it wouldn't be long until she starts dropping hints of wanting marriage in a way she can dismiss it as just thinking out loud and not meaning anything behind it. Same for children, randomly asking what name for a girl/boy you prefer out of some she's thought about and dismissing it as mere curiosity

Except when you're getting intimate, at that point she drops all pretense

Also i disagree, she seems busy tending to her garden all the time like the flowers are her children, obviously she'd go mom mode times 100 the second a tiny whiff of the pregnancy hormones start in her body

[Anonymous No.]

>>44753811
I don't know, caring for flowers are caring of children are two different things. No one who has ever raised children has found it to be a relaxing experience.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44753822
Tell us, Anon, didn't your mother say you were the best thing that ever happened to her?

[Anonymous No.]

>>44754403
I was a piece of shit growing up and the primary reason that I don't ever want to have children of my own.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44754777
Skill issue

[Anonymous No.]

Time for the hags to sleep, again.
Lights out, ladies!

[Anonymous No.]

>>44758344
I wanna sleep on their soft hag bellies

[Anonymous No.]

>>44758344
NONE of them are wearing pantsu!
It's almost like they want-
Oh wait, they do. Nevermind.

[Anonymous No.]

Would be funny if you just slept near or in front of them and then wake up full of sweat with your clothes gone with all of them clinging to you, blaming it all on them just having had too much to drink
Haha yeah funny

[Anonymous No.]

In a situation like this you can counter Yukari by clinging to her instead of the other way around
This will have absolutely no unforeseen consequences

[Anonymous No.]

>>44758344
What's with the cat ears on the left?

[Anonymous No.]

>>44759226
Hags indulge in embarrasing cosplay in order to feel young again

[Anonymous No.]

>>44758950
I subscribe to the idea that Yukari despite acting smug and that she knows everything, the second she's receiving affection she melts down and is unable to function and

[Anonymous No.]

>>44760193
>and
And what?!
AND WHAT ANON?!
ANON!
ANON COME IN!

[Anonymous No.]

>>44760354
Abducted for snuggling. Another good man lost.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44760387
On one hand
A hag getting a man means there is less hags to worry about
On the other
The remaining hags will get even more desperate, even more so after the lucky one flaunts her new prize

[Anonymous No.]

>>44760354
My apologies, I am unable to disclose my current whereabouts

[Anonymous No.]

>>44760430
>>44760430
I will not be silenced
As I was saying, despite acting like the smug know it all woman she pretends to be the second she's shown love she turns into a red mess and also

[Anonymous No.]

Anon got corrected...
Right in front of me...

[Anonymous No.]

I HATE HAGS

[Anonymous No.]

I LOVE HAGS

[Anonymous No.]

I AM INDIFFERENT TO HAGS

[Anonymous No.]

I LOVE HAGS, BUT ONLY IF THEY AREN'T OBESE

[Anonymous No.]

I LOVE FAT, MILKY HAGS

[Anonymous No.]

I’m not sure I’m totally on board with getting hag abducted guys…

[Anonymous No.]

Do not show hags love guys I underestimated how desperate to get seeded these women are. now every 30 mins some gap appears and this lady finds whatever excuse for me to give her attention

[Anonymous No.]

Ran used to be a lot smaller

[Anonymous No.]

>>44761409
Relax. Only Yukari and Okina have powers particularly suited for abduction. Yukari found a husband/bodypillow so only one abduction is left. Statistically you'd have to be a particularly unlucky sap to be the one Okina

[Anonymous No.]

I WANT TO IMPREGNATE HAGS

[Anonymous No.]

>>44761731
What happens if Okina abducts you? What will she do to you?!

[Anonymous No.]

>>44761529
Ran is a big fox girl.

>>44761731
>>44761762
He’s been kidnapped by the secret goddess! I don’t want to be stripped of my free will and turned into a hag’s boy toy!

[Anonymous No.]

>>44761762
Well first, there'll need some brain tinkering. Can't let you think about escaping, or about your parents again, or any beloved ones for that matter, maybe hobbies as well? Scratch that, let's format the hard drive, as the youngins say. You'll get pretty clothes and a fun, fulfilling mission. Aren't you excited?

[Anonymous No.]

Last for my wife.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44761881
Oh no you don't!

[Anonymous No.]

Thank goodness Kasen is a nice, sweet old hag unlike Yukari and Okina. Kasen would never abduct you just because she takes a liking to you!

[Anonymous No.]

It was a nice thread

I wanna marry the shikigami and the gap hag
and keep the cat as my child

i think that's nice too
Chen will be a big sister soon

[Anonymous No.]

I want her to look at me predatorily while drinking tea under a big parasol in a table in the garden of the sun.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44761954
This is the recommended path, like a 3 for 1 deal.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44762038
You mean, get 1 fit and young and totally in shape woman, get a pet and a MILF fox?
Not a deal that sways me. She'll have to try harder.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44761954
>>44762038
marrying into the yakumo household!
being loud every night with the two yakumo whilst Chen doesn't know what is going on! why don't they let her sleep quietly and why her master and Yukari-sama's bellies have been getting bigger

[Anonymous No.]

>>44762193
How does getting a blonde woman in a wheelchair and two girls with shoes on their heads sound instead? You'll have to dance and push around the wheelchair all day.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44762600
Hell.
I'd resort to molesting them in full view of their master in order to try and get kicked out within a week.
If she's into it, I will have to escalate things by making cripple jokes, preferably ones that will get shoehead and notmai to laugh and embarass her.

[Anonymous No.]

Best hag.

[Anonymous No.]

She's not my #1, but I'm not entirely sure I could resist the sex hime.

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

FUCK HAGS

[Anonymous No.]

I would tell every hag that they're ugly to their face.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44763496
That's the idea, yeah.

[Anonymous No.]

>>44760193
And what? That's it? She melts down and is unable to function and gives you a million dollars, or, she melts down and is unable to function and gives you your own spaceship? I mean what the f-

[Anonymous No.]