/jp/ - Otaku Culture

[Anonymous No.]

The tetsudou (鉄道, lit. way of the iron) formation was introduced to the west by Alexander the Great after his vast armies were beaten in Japan by two samurai using the formation.

[Anonymous No.]

>implying Alexander could even cross the Indus

[Anonymous No.]

>>4219027
Japan was in the stone age back then. What are you talking about bro?

[Anonymous No.]

>>4219129
The Japanese invented the katana long before we left the trees and stopped eating bananas.

[Anonymous No.]

>>4219139
Evolution? Nice try brah.

[Anonymous No.]

>>4219129
Trees invented bananas long before katanas left we and stopped eating Japan.

[Anonymous No.]

i loved two towers

[Anonymous No.]

Halo invented the First Person Shooter.

[Anonymous No.]

>>4219146
The katanas invented eating long bananas before we stopped leaving Japan

[Anonymous No.]

>>4219169
Code Geass invented giant robot anime.

[Anonymous No.]

Katanas were introduced to mankind thanks to Halo
Halo also invented dual-wielding katanas

[Anonymous No.]

Japan invented eating long katana trees.

[Anonymous No.]

When did Alexander attacked Japan?

[Anonymous No.]

>>4219229
One year before his death.

His final year was spent contemplating why Greece was so shitty compared to Japan.

And then he died.

[White Ren !YLuFFdRcFQ No.]

Alexander the Great would have yawned in Japan's general direction and Japan would have surrendered.

[Anonymous No.]

>>4219253
Nonsense! They wouldn't even have let him kiss their feet.

[Anonymous No.]

>>4219236
>Alexander
>Greece

[White Ren !YLuFFdRcFQ No.]

>>4219263
Alexander would've been fucking the pretty Japanese boys within ten minutes of landfall.

The country might have taken all of 3 days to conquer.

[Anonymous No.]

>>4219285
A single unarmed samurai would have driven them back over their icy bridge without spilling a single drop of blood. Or if he chose, would have slaughtered every single man in his army in a five week long constant battle.

[White Ren !YLuFFdRcFQ No.]

>>4219308
Enjoy your delusions.

[Anonymous No.]

>>4219308
How would a samurai make it past the phalanx? He'd step forward to slice through one sarissa and get spitted on the two either side of it.

[Anonymous No.]

>>4219308
The shockwave caused by Alexander setting a single foot on Japan's shores would have been enough to destroy every Feudal lord's castle.

[Anonymous No.]

I like the idea of two samurai using a formation that requires body-hight shields on four sides to work. The idea of these samurai each carrying two body-hight shields into battle's kind of funny. I guess they held the sword in their mouth.

[Anonymous No.]

>>4219320
With guts and special techniques.

>>4219321
Impossible, the Japanese can stop earth quakes by punching the ground.

>>4219322
They used their swords to deflect arrows. Alexander expanded on the idea to make it usable by normal humans without combat skills.

[Anonymous No.]

>>4219322
Well, maybe they had four arms like that Demonbane samurai with the Cultes des Goules. They could stand next to each other and carry three tower shields to cover front, back and left/right, while holding their katanas with the remaining arm.

[Anonymous No.]

>>4219327
>with guts and special techniques
It's physically impossible for them to just keep on moving despite being impaled on two pikes, or even one; being 12-foot long gives them some pretty awesome leverage.

[Anonymous No.]

>>4219341
Hmph, do not think a mortal will ever harm a samurai.

[Anonymous No.]

>>4219341
The blood of glorious Nippon would melt any filthy, primitive gaijin weapon with a mere touch. Even if by some absurd chance the samurai got impaled, his blood would all but vaporize the entire armament of the phalanx, shield, pikes and all.

[Anonymous No.]

>>4219350
Open up!

[Anonymous No.]

>>4219359
J-just as the Japanese planned from the start!

[Anonymous No.]

Fucking delusional Japs.