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/jp/ - Otaku Culture

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4143019 No.4143019 [Reply] [Original]

As a newly arrived resident in Gensokyo, you decided it would be wise to go pay one of the most powerful families of the place a visit to show some respect: The Yakumo family.
Of course it would be rude of you to visit them without bringing gifts, so you started your preparation.
For Chen-sama you decided to bring with you some expensive catnips.
For Ran-sama you decided to bring with you some expensive fried tofus.
But for Yukari-sama, what would you bring?

>> No.4143027

Anti-aging cream.

>> No.4143058

There's a gift in this world that's far greater than all of those.

It creates armies, overthrows kings, brings nations together and gives birth to countless moments of historic importance. You can't hold it in your hands, or smell or taste it, but you'll know when you have it. Those who lack it become envious of those who have this treasure, and ironically, that envy may lead them to tear it apart without gaining it for themselves.

It's a treasure to be cherished, and remembered fondly. The gift of friendship.

Or chocolate. Everybody loves chocolate!

>> No.4143089

>>4143019
I give her my penis.

>> No.4143105

I refer to women politely as "Miss" instead of "sama" because I am not a faggot.

>> No.4143112

My Dick in an elaborately wrapped box.

>> No.4143117

Diapers

>> No.4143143
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4143143

>> No.4143155
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4143155

>> No.4143203
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4143203

I'll give her oblivion!

>> No.4143319

ZUN had made clear about what Ran and Chen(indirectly) likes but never on what Yukari likes. What's so secret about it?

>> No.4143326

>>4143319
She loves cocks.
>>4143112 has the right idea.

>> No.4143356

she is a gap demon. she puts things in her gaps. things come out of her gaps. she has a big gap.

>> No.4143366

How about giving her a tied up, ball gagged, and blind folded Rinnosuke?

>> No.4143400

>>4143019
Like they would care or pay attention to a newcomer.

Anyways, I'd bring her jewelry and shit.

>> No.4143413

>>4143400
>Anyways, I'd bring her jewelry and shit.

I'll overlook the 'shit' part, but are you implying to her that she is old?

>> No.4143423

Maybe a couple tabs of date rape so she can lick Reimu's armpits without any resistance, that will surely get in her good graces.

>> No.4143443 [DELETED] 

>>4143413
No.

Her boundary manipulating ability probably allows her to get for herself practically anything both from Gensokyo and from the outer world, thus it's rather impossible to impress her with a present of any kind when she already can possess anything.

So I give her expensive jewelry to show her my wealth and prove her I'm not only some random, average villager who isn't worth her attention more than a piece of dog shit does.

>> No.4143445

>>4143423
Reimu use fly!
Anonymous used DATE RAPE!
It missed...

>> No.4143458

>>4143413
No.

Her boundary manipulating ability probably allows her to get for herself practically anything both from Gensokyo and from the outer world, thus it's rather impossible to impress her with a present of any kind when she already can possess anything.

So, if I were to present her with anything, at least I'd give her something expensive, like jewelry, to show her my wealth and thus gain her attention. In XIXth century morals, money talks, after all.

>> No.4143465

this

*grabs dick*

>> No.4143483

You guys suck.

First I'll hand over the expensive catnips to Chen, and that makes her happy.
Then I'll hand over the expensive fried tofus to Ran, and that makes her happy.
Yukari then asks me: "What have you brought for me then?"
To which I'll reply: "The happiness of Ran and Chen."

>> No.4143499

>>4143483
Then she gaps you to the molten core of the planet for such a cheesy remark.

>> No.4143520

>>4143499
a lady like herself would be humored and delighted by this word play

>> No.4143529

>>4143520
But she's not a lady, she's an old, vengeful hag.

>> No.4143653
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4143653

>>4143483
>Yukari then asks me: "What have you brought for me then?"
>To which I'll reply: "The happiness of Ran and Chen."

You sly motherfucker. I'm stealing your idea.

>> No.4143663

Bring her Hale and Jungle Guu?

>> No.4143666

>>4143663
Guu is like a gap monster too.

>> No.4143685

>>4143666
>>4143663
More like her stomach is like a Doraemon pocket.

>> No.4143687

Christ, /jp/, what the fuck is wrong with you?

Catnip?
Chen needs a bicycle with training wheels.

>> No.4143701

>>4143019
A laptop.

Also about th OP pic, I understand how the touhous are flying but how about their utensils and table?

>> No.4143704
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4143704

>>4143458

She wouldn't of grabbed an ipod and original gameboy from Rinnosuke if she had everything she wanted. From a lot of the dialogues it's clear she's a nostalgia fag and probably likes antiques, collectors items or things of cultural significance.

>> No.4143706

>>4143701
All 3 touhous are falling down in great speed along with the table and stuff.

>> No.4143710

A personal computer with built in wifi. The kapa could probably get an internet connection going.

>> No.4143714

I would bring a railway map and a time schedule, so that she would be able to know where trains are at any given point in time.

>> No.4143852
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4143852

I would give her Gaap, because I heard she liked making gaps, so now she can gap while she gaps.

>> No.4143856

How would you deliver the present if you can't make it out of your house three steps before you're attacked and eaten by a youkai.

>> No.4143860

>>4143856
You ask Rumia to protect you.

>> No.4145155
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4145155

>>4143483
and then you do this face

>> No.4145161

>>4145155
And with that final killer move, she's all yours.

>> No.4145166
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4145166

yeah good luck finding Mayohiga. you're doomed to failure from the start.

I'll visit Reimu and give any low-level youkai (the ones most likely to attack me) I meet gifts instead.

>> No.4145171

>>4145166
Attach a tracking device to her dress.

>> No.4145178

>>4145166
Silly anon. With all those expensive catnips and expensive fried tofus hanging on you, do you think you'll end up anywhere else?

>> No.4145189

>>4143704
Then get her a faberge egg.

>>
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