/jp/ - Otaku Culture

[Anonymous No.]

Christmas-time regrets, /jp/.

I remember a few years ago, Wal-Mart was having a black friday sale on Gamecubes. $79 and it came with the zelda disk, with Ocarina, Majora's Mask, Zelda 1 and 2.

I told my mom about it, i was freaking out. I wanted it so bad, it was the first time gamecubes had been cheap enough for my family to afford.

I went to bed. My mom stayed up all night waiting in line at wal-mart, got to electronics, got one of the last ones on the shelf, paid for it, fought traffic and other shoppers, and came home. She dropped it off at the house for me to play while she was at work. (mom was single at the time, was just me and her.)

When i opened the box, i called her, while she was at work, with no sleep, and i yelled at her. I told her that purple was a gay color, and that the black one is the one she should have gotten, and i hated it.

I heard her sob a little, and told me she'd take it back and get the other one.

My heart sunk. I looked at the purple controller, and realized right then, that gamecube was something given to me as a gift, selflessly, and i called her back. I apologized to her, told her i loved her, and that i loved the gamecube.

That day was the first time i ever beat Majora's Mask. I did nothing but play that game all day long. I fell asleep in my chair with that gamecube controller in hand. When i woke up the next morning, there was a blanket around me, and a small lipstick kiss on my cheek from my mother.

[Anonymous No.]

Sugoi monogatari, aniki.
Disappointed for lack of Bel-Air ending.

[Anonymous No.]

Holy fuck you're an ass.

[Anonymous No.]

I can't believe I read all that, you're a real fuckin asshole.

[White Ren !YLuFFdRcFQ No.]

Nice (made up) story, kyoudai.

[Anonymous No.]

Way to be a douchebag to your own mom.

[Anonymous No.]

>>3969288

[Anonymous No.]

Cool story, bro.
I've never really had regrets about anything.

[Anonymous No.]

>Heart-warming (albeit potentially fake) story
>Respond with hatred

[Anonymous No.]

ur a faget

[Anonymous No.]

Asshole

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

Today I felt like experimenting a bit. After shitting on the floor as usual, instead of letting it to dry or cleaning it up, a perverted thought flashed through my mind. I found that puddle of crap amazingly arousing. Even though I fapped to my Rika earlier today, I got a boner.
I don't have any fleshlights, but I found an empty plastic Nestea bottle. You know, those ones have a double-sized opening, instead of the standard coke bottles. It was almost a perfect fit for my penis and I instantly knew what to do.
I filled the bottle with my fresh crap. It was a perfect piece of shit, not too hard but not too liquid either. It's as if God had created it just for me, for that unforgivable moment. Its hardness was roughly that of common toothpaste.
I was reluctant for a bit, but it's not like I could sink any lower than a floor-shitting NEET. I thrust in my cock. It felt so awesome. Soft and warm, it was so close to a real woman. I kept on going and going and had the best orgasm in my entire life.
I know it sounds disgusting, but this is probably even better than the real thing(or, at least I guess, being a virgin), you guys must try it.

[Anonymous No.]

>>3969317
/jp/ is the most frustrated board of 4chan.

[Anonymous No.]

tl;dr

[ZUN !barYV1VtIA No.]

>>3969311

I love how Sion just posts his pics/reacting images and doesn't even bother to read or comment on the thread.

[Anonymous No.]

>>3969323

[Nigger !73VOHXDuLo No.]

>>3969333
tl;dr shit in bottle, stick dick in it, feels good

[White Ren !YLuFFdRcFQ No.]

>>3969329
>>3969317
>OP wants to continue his own thread.

[Anonymous No.]

>>3969339
I think he's being a fucking cunt.
Toadstools deserve better.

[Anonymous No.]

oh god I love Chihaya

[Nigger !73VOHXDuLo No.]

Imo, Instead of putting shit in a bottle try the toy in this image, I had no pillow stuffing so I used cotton balls.

Just make sure not to put too many cottonballs in or its way to tight and requires you to shove your rock hard erection in hard until it opens.

I used lotion for my lube.

But yes this homemade toy took me no time at all, I had all the materials since they are extremely common, and it felt pretty good.

So give in to the temptation and give it a try, and become a no life like me.

[Anonymous No.]

if that story is true, fuck you.
I wish i had a mother like yours.

spoilt brat.

[Anonymous No.]

>>3969368
Holy shit this is brilliant.

[Tohno ♥ ‮ufiaw iam si iganiM ‪‪‪‬ !!UhnG3iuGcmC No.]

People always seem to find incredible deals on black Friday, all I ever see is stuff at the same price..

[Anonymous No.]

>>3969288
;_;