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/jp/ - Otaku Culture

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3842767 No.3842767 [Reply] [Original]

On two occasions, I have been asked by members of Parliament, 'Pray, Lord Anonymous, would you not agree that Tewi is the finest Touhou Project character available to date?' I am not able to rightly apprehend the kind of confusion of ideas that could provoke such a question.

>> No.3842779

Send a letter to the pope and have those fools excommunicated sire.

>> No.3842782
File: 450 KB, 1600x1200, 1259052534278.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

This Tewi madness doth confound and distress me, every man of proper stature and breeding assuredly knows that Kanako Yasaka be truly the muse of our hearts

>> No.3842785
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Indeed, there should be no need to ask for it is self-evident.

>> No.3842789


A goodly "Touhou," surely, though personally I prefer Miss Flandre of the House of the Scarlet Devil.

>> No.3842791

Those accursed storks, gentlemen! THOSE ACCURSED STORKS!

>> No.3842792
File: 533 KB, 850x773, 5e011c94094f6259caaedfbffb61204b.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Nay my good sir, cease with thine ramblings ere thou loseth all semblance of sanity! It is a surety that only a lass such as Mima doth make our hearts tremble in awe.

>> No.3842813


Balderdash! This 'Tewi' you are so enthralled with is in fact a cad and and a charlatan of the most unbecoming demeanor

>> No.3842823


I am afraid that I must concur. That damnedable Tewi character attempted to swindle me out of a most lucrative operation in the East Indies for her own gain.

>> No.3842826

Pray, offer up thine evidence that you may suade me properly. Otherwise, I am led to believe that the charlatan is, in fact, thyself!

>> No.3842830
File: 27 KB, 304x345, Ben_ok2_sharp.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Hey guys what's going on?

>> No.3842839


This 'Mima' you are so inclined to favour, is, as the up and coming young gentleman of Oxford would say, is 'old hat', when, pray tell twas the last she made her appearance known? Ages ago surely. It be best that thou would move on thou surely showeth thine age.

>> No.3842837


I've kept transcripts of our negotiations for just such a purpose, you may view them at my flat at your earliest convenience, my good man.

>> No.3842835

Vile succubus!

>> No.3842843
File: 159 KB, 722x722, 172ef1356f265f6d3f52ff6ceb1491cbab2ebbe1.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

By my troth, sirs, allow me but once to free yonder canine from her shackles, so that she may make sport with the rabbit that plagues you so. I warrant you shall have your pleasure ere she has finished.

>> No.3842849


A most agreeable proposition, Lord Brunestud. Release your hound, so that we might be rid of that damendable rabbit once and for all!

>> No.3842850

A girl seeking payment for sevices rendered is no charlatan! You'll soon find Fortune smiling upon you, have no doubt.

>> No.3842852


...get the fuck out of here, Franklin.

>> No.3842856


A canine of the finest breeding I do see. Strong jaw and back, clear eyes, and a pleasant disposition. I do believe I am experiencing what those in the far Oriental of Zipang call 'moe'

>> No.3842865


Services rendered?! Good sir, she would steal the very couch upon which you are currently resting if you but gave her the opportunity.

>> No.3842870


I must remember to thank Admiral Perry for throwing wide the gates of that same oriental paradise.

>> No.3842871

Doth we still not beg succor of our Lord and Saviour, though it millenia since His last appearance? Nay, sir, I put forth that such thought is indeed the essence of insanity, and such irrational thought can only be destructive. Rather than such illogic, I'll put this faith of mine in my bones, what are telling me Mima, the nigh-irresistible siren we all know and love, shall make herself known again.

Much obliged, it gives me boundless pleasure to know that thou wouldst not have me take a gander at such an outrageous claim without proper documentation!

>> No.3842874

Then who better to take on and send to thine neighbors, sayeth I! For but the price of a singular couch, my good fellow, thou shalt make far more from the fruits of thine woefully uniformed Lords! Tewi is, indeed, the harbinger of great fortune!

>> No.3842880
File: 425 KB, 800x800, 172ef1356f265f6d3f52ff6ceb1491cbab2ebbe1.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]


Marry, sir, the canine is of truly excellent pedigree, possessing lustrous fur, an unmistakably moist, cool, nose a hale and hearty frame.

Yet she is indeed an accomplished huntress. I wager that you shall sleep soundly to-night, Sir, and nary a trace of the pest that so troubled your repose.

Pray tell, are the fires stirred in your loins by the grace and ephemeral beauty of the canine, Sir? Mark ye well that the inter-course between beast and man hath been named 'Bestiality' by the Holy Church.

>> No.3842883

Why does thou tempt his Lordship with such heresy?

>> No.3842885
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Sir, it is a commonality amongst Canines to make sport.

>> No.3842888
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As beautific as thine hound is, Sir Brunestud, I have not choice but to protest! The mere suggestion that a personage such as I would stoop to sodomy at the sight of a singular lustrously groomed tail is, quite simply, an outrage! Pray, purvey thine boasts in a more courteous manner, ere great offense is taken!

Though, in the spirit of competition, I fancy I have found a beauteous animal companion that dims even thine radiantly glowing hound! Is her plumage not the most adorable thing man hath ever laid eyes upon?

>> No.3842892

And sport it shall make, for the witch hunters if it continues such heretic games.

>> No.3842900
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Stay thine hand and let not your heart be afflicted with woe. A mere Princess such as I would not cast aspersions upon the honour of her peerage.

If ye shall address yonder creatures of the skies, then mark well the 'Hell-Raven'. Luster she lacks not, as she is endowed with the hallowed wonder-power thine wise-men hath named 'Energy-Of-The-Nucleus'. What use this fabled energy hath to us, I know not.

>> No.3842903
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I think all honourable members of the opposition would agree that not only is the flatness of Suika delicious, her appearance as that of a cute little girl combined with the glorious substance of alcohol make her one of, if not the greatest, Twice Wench.

>> No.3842912
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Bah, Popish idolatry, good sir, we live in an age of reason and science! We have ships of steel that cross the mighty Atlantic, we have set forth to lay claim to the distant land of the Hottentot and the Hindoo! Man has conquered the sky with the Montgolfier hot air balloon. If thou taketh thine orders from some Italian of both ancient thinking and frame then we may as well taketh all our hard worked industry and live the life of the lazy Spaniard or the superstitious Moor. But enough of that, as the saying goes 'judge not lest ye be judged'

>> No.3842917
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In the vain hope I giveth not offense, I'm afraid that I must confess that thine "Hell-Raven" hath been throwing the most sultry of looks in mine direction. Such behavior as this, is this truly the norm for her? Whilst her endowments are indeed stunning, such wanton behavior can only speak ill of her, regardless of how lustrous this appearance of hers is!

I prefer mine companions of yonder skies to be as maidens; ne'er wilting under the gaze of man, yet ne'er encouraging nor purposefully evoking lust either!

>> No.3842947
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Good sir, were I to have want of a lass of thine example, I would but venture to the nearest village, apprehend a peasant girl, and put her into my service with drink aplenty! I see not what distinguishes thine wench from any other! At the very least, this bar servant of mine yields to me alcohol of the finest variety, whilst spilling nary a single drop!

>> No.3842956
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Verily, feast your eyes on the countenance of that nitwit faery. It brings me naught but great humor.

>> No.3842962


Dohohoho! I for one enjoy viewing this fool cavort and caper! Oh my! What tomfoolery this faery brings!

>> No.3843035
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I am racked by laughter and merriment upon laying eyes on yonder lackwit, sir. Truly, she entertains the court well with her gambols.


Thine wise-men hath informed me of the Hell-Raven's intent to 'fusion' with a willing partner. What this means I do not rightly know.

>> No.3843037
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Forgive my impertinence, gentlemen but I feel the need to enlighten you all as to the transcendental resplendence of the young lady whose visage accompanies this post.
Surely you will concede that her existence within this thread is truly a boon to us all?

>> No.3843052
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Her great powers over density of all things combined with the strength and celebration attitude of her horned orge kind make her beyond unique, but near godlike.

It is said she hath even defeated the legendary Shinto Shrine maiden of the magical land of the far east, whose powers were previously thought to have been next to none.

>> No.3843082

This thread doth be verily amusing. Mine clamorous glee doth be arousing the attention of bourgeois poised adjacently.

>> No.3843079

Good sir, I do not wish to spread rumors or be a tattletale, but I've heard some unnerving stories about this young maiden. Little birds have sung to me that she remains locked inside her mansion's basement. Many say that it is so for a good reason, indeed.

>> No.3843112
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How now, my sweet creature of bombast? Marry come up, the singers will spread word of the jollities and merry-making that have conspired in the Court of Brunestud, and they shall warrant that the White Princess doth lead a very gleeful company of knights indeed.


News of this has reached mine ears, as well as word from the peasantry that an avenging forest-spirit in the guise of a fair maiden lays waste to all who dare set foot within her realm.

It is said that her stratagem is to lure virile young men into her power with a fair face, and once they have entered she consumes them whole.

Marry, sirs, this Oriental Land that you speak of doth seem to be an overly dark and dangerous territory, by my halidom.

>> No.3843114

Thou has lead me Astray.

>> No.3843129
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Slander and lies is what you have heard, my good sir. In truth, she only punishes those who desecrate the verdant sanctuary that is her home.

Picking up the flowers is forbidden, you see.

>> No.3843130
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At risk of great insult, it is mine civic duty to observe that nary a sane peerage wouldst accept the twittering of minuscule winged companions as sufficient testimony of character! However, nary an ill rumor exists of yonder flaxen-haired maiden's sister! Forsooth, the radiance and charisma of Lady Remilia is truly an ineffable miracle of the known world!

>> No.3843131 [DELETED] 

stop spamming and ddosing Anon Talk .com also stop trolling and harassing us and remove all clones and troll articles and lies and leave us alone if u do this well stop posting these msgs forever

>> No.3843154
File: 234 KB, 557x670, 172ef1356f265f6d3f52ff6ceb1491cbab2ebbe1.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]


Pray tell, sir, what of the Church's ex-communication of the Lady Remilia? Surely a maiden so fair of face would not be hiding a secret foul enough to warrant the Pope himself decreeing her an enemy of all free peoples?


Mine own ears hath heard of these 'flowers' Some devilish sorcery it appears to be, as the flowers themselves are lethal to human nature. Queer flowers they be, to take root in human flesh. Marry, I warrant that these 'flowers' be as treacherous as their mistress.

Meseemeth that yonder 'flowers' are but a lure by any other name, a ruse to allow the enchantress to exert her powers over the unknowing peasantry.

Hold, hold. Let not the fair guise of the flower-spirit prevent thee from imparting thy swift justice.

>> No.3843157
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What ho! Why not but three passings of the moon ago, I heard a similar tale with mine own ears! At risk of being queried as to the state of mine hearing, I'd venture that said courier had naught but descriptions of the greatest of merit of a flower spirit he caught sight of in a vast field of flowers of the sun. Upon hearing his words, I'll forget them not: "'twas early morn, with the sun high as I espied a most curious creature with hair as that of grass. Remarkably feminine in nature, I felt an estiring such as I've never felt before whilst I watched her tend diligently to the earth. Were I not a proper, God-fearing man, I'd put forth the notion this dainty creature is a spirit of the Earth itself! Regardless, this chance encounter has left me stricken of heart, and her poise and being can only be described as: inhuman beauty~"

What say you, my good man?

>> No.3843161

Fine sirs, whilst I pray that mine dissension doth not translate as an affront to thine sensibilities, I feel that I must dissuade thee basing thine assumptions of strangers upon such unsubstantiated hearsay.

>> No.3843170
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I mark that La Belle Dame Sans Merci hath thee in thrall, sir.

My heart is full of fear at the prospect of ranging in yonder Oriental Paradise. I am but a tender maid, ill-suited as thou art to such wiles.

My only recourse is to remain within my chambers forevermore, while thou and thy company of Nameless Knights dost journey through the valley of peril.

>> No.3843178
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Sir, the Holy Church hath warned me that yonder Scarlet doth keep company with an evil magician, a monster from the Orient, and a Maid who hath sold her immortal soul to the Devil himself in exchange for the uncanny ability to halt the passage of Time itself.

>> No.3843205
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Whilst I am claim not to be among the upper hierarchy of all whom are right-thinking, I can only venture to say this: said Lady is in possession of a beauty so fair that it maketh the hearts of others foul. Suspicion and envy transformeth even the most rational of men into fear-mongering, virtue-less curs!

For but one chance to feel once again warmth in my heart, I would traverse the very bowels of Hell itself! Fear not, Brunestud: even mine readily apparent mortality is naught in comparison to this opportunity which has seen fit to seek out of my company! I dare not tarry long, lest it escape me, so I will part with this: were even the most vile of gossip true, I would still return to the dirt from whence I came with a satisfied smile blessing my person.

>> No.3843218

What is this madness of which you speak? The residents of the Scarlet Devil's mansion have committed no crimes against their neighbors, and no wrongdoings to visitors. You would do well to keep your paranoid ramblings to yourself, lest actions be taken to halt your slander.

>> No.3843221

It appears as though thine intransigence is matched only by thine willingness to accept the verisimilitude of the Holy Church's ramblings!
Tis an age not purely of faith, but also of science that we live in! I hath rendezvoused with young Ms Scarlet several times now and can attest to both her continence and her moral virtuousness, and will not lend an ear to slander directed towards her fine person.

>> No.3843226
File: 360 KB, 962x660, Remilia.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Ah, but did not our Holy Church also call into question the simultaneous humanity and divinity of our Lord? Me thinketh that mayhap the Church is not the paragon of all thought, and is, at risk of heresy, just as fallible as a layman! Listen not to foul rumors, but peer instead into the noble eyes of a Lady misunderstood: dost thou truly see a soul ridden with contempt and evil intent?

Ah! 'Tis a remarkable character to smile so whilst such vile utterances are made of her! Were it I, I knowest not what I would do!

>> No.3843228
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I wager that with a heart as stout as thine own, thou mayest yet vanquish whatever evil is rumored to lie in the Oriental Paradise.

Fare ye well, Nameless Knight. I shall remain here in my courts, as I have heard tell of this radical new sect promising long-life and health to those who shut themselves within their chambers.

The name I cannot yet recall, but I warrant that it begins with an N, being of four letters, and is finished with a T.

>> No.3843244 [DELETED] 

stop spamming and ddosing Anon Talk .com also stop trolling and harassing us and remove all clones and troll articles and lies and leave us alone if u do this well stop posting these msgs forever

>> No.3843258
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Prithee, sirs, to close thine ears to the words of the Holy Church is folly. Were it not for the Church, thine own sciences and knowledge would fain have not existence.

Fallible the Church may be, and yet the Papal state commands enough power to erase thine existence.

Even I durst not disobey the Church - look ye here upon the blue-haired Crusader whose steps hath followed mine ere long.
I worship not the Crucified Man, but the strength of the Holy See in Rome is such that I must needs bend the knee to them.

>> No.3843286

Pah! Thine words are as poison to mine ears, spouted forth on the tongue of a monster as grotesque as thee!
I know of thine history, foul walker of the night, and it is with shock and disdain that I hear thee communicating the scriptures of the Church. What manner of hideous trickery is it that thou uses the words of thine enemy to delude us innocent souls into conversing with thee?

>> No.3843295

The church may place my mighty rod upon their lips, and suck upon it.

>> No.3843313
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Peace. Still thine tongue but for a moment, and hear my words.

The Holy See has placed bondage upon my person, and enslaved me to their will. I can utter nothing but the truths they spake unto me, as the will of the Church is firmly impressed upon me.

Ye look now upon an unwilling slave of the Holy Church, forced into subservience to exert the Holy See's power upon the non-believers.

>> No.3843324
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I feel it pertinent to make note that not all denizens of this orient appear to be of such dubious character.

This madame, so enthralled by piety, has refused to lower her arms in what I can only assume is penance.

>> No.3843325
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>> No.3843328


Thy mighty rod seemeth small in stature and ill-formed, leading me to wonder at what grace it is given to earn the epithet of might.

>> No.3843340
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Milord, perhaps yonder spirit is bound to the Church's will.

Hark ye, look upon my bonds and mark that I am also forced to avail myself as the Christ Jesus did.

Thou mayest do well to free yonder maiden of darkness from her bondage.

>> No.3843349

tier list.

>> No.3843382

what the hell are you all saying, speak english

>> No.3843389


Remove thyself from my court, cur.

>> No.3843417

Your dominion is nonexistent. Make no claims to the sanctity of this court, nave.

>> No.3843428
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Utter not this foolishness within my sovereignty, sirrah. Long have I ruled within these hallowed halls. My claim to the Millennium Castle is far stronger than thine own, I daresay.

>> No.3843445


>> No.3843446

spleen-wracked knaves, cease your yowling.

>> No.3843469


Guard thy tongue, sir. Hast thou no regard for the tender ears of babes and the fairer sex?

>> No.3843502


>> No.3843858


What a course manner of speech you display. This is a place of gentlemanly discourse, not some American tavern, rife with women of loose morals and Irishmen!

>> No.3843905


>Virile bovine feculence

>> No.3844613
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>> No.3844613,1 [INTERNAL] 

This tread is full of win

>> No.3844613,2 [INTERNAL] 

dows Vista.