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/jp/ - Otaku Culture

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3760058 No.3760058 [Reply] [Original]

>> No.3760064

What if everyone on /jp/ masturbates at the same time?

>> No.3760068

>>3760064
We get night /jp/.

>> No.3760072

Erika has a larger dick than Battler's

>> No.3760071

>>3760064

Shit, let's do this. Set a time and date for everyone. It's like that day where everyone jumps at the same time but better.

>> No.3760075

>>3760071
Didn't we already do this on /b/ a few years ago?

It was supposed to be something big, but in the end it was just another quick fap.

>> No.3760080

Alright, let's get a date set. Preferably in a few hours.

>> No.3760091

>>3760080

In 2 hours and 5 minutes.

>> No.3760102

3 (4?) episodes left and still there's no Erika in anime.
;_;

>> No.3760105

>>3760091
Alright, /jp/ fap time will be at 13 GMT. Any objections?

>> No.3760107

Imagine, /jp/edos as you are coming the sights and sounds and feelings of all the other anons on /jp/ coming at the same time.

>> No.3760109

>>3760080
Let's do it right now. I need to fap right now.

>> No.3760112

post pics

>> No.3760120

>>3760109
Hold it in for 2 more hours.

>> No.3760122
File: 44 KB, 400x600, d9c03208f0eb56516358464218d44d44.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3760122

P..Please don't stare at me so much, baka!

>> No.3760182

Half hourly bump.

>> No.3760395

19 minutes!

>> No.3760450

It's time for the official /jp/ group fap! Stop what you're doing right now and go fap!

>> No.3760469

75%
Almost there!

>> No.3760471

I don't think this worked out so well.

>> No.3760473

>>3760450
"Unf Unf, Oh Anonymous your ass is so tight. My penis is like a coral snake passing through the ocean floor."

It will take some 6 or 8 stroke before i shoot my poison.

"Anonymous, say my name!!"

"Ahn~~~~~♥"

>> No.3760475

I can't find any fap material.

>> No.3760476

>>3760122
Somebody call Greenpeace, there's a whale where it shouldn't.

>> No.3760478

I shall fap with you comrades

>> No.3760480

Well, there's no rules or anything. Just start fapping. Hell, you don't even have to ejaculate, just stroke.

>> No.3760495

>>3760480
*faps*

*stops*

Now what?

>> No.3760506
File: 192 KB, 800x600, 5860219.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3760506

>>3760495
get ready for the collective consciousness collision

>> No.3760595

Phew, I finally came.

>> No.3760599

Welp guys, I fapped
Did it to a public use thread in /d/ along with a monster disguised as clothing thread,

First I took off my shorts and boxers and put on a non cloth pair of shorts, went to the bathroom put some lotion on my right hand and went to town.

Opened up monster disguised as clothing thread, and came into my trashcan. (which is filled with paper towels so my spit/cum doesn't pool on bottom)
Then I wanted to fap again a second time so I opened up images, then moved onto public use thread which was a few pages back in /d/
(I know theres always one in there but that is pretty hot.) Came again 2nd time into trashcan

After that I went to the bathroom and washed off my hands, and washed off my penis, so I can go to sleep without lotion feeling on both my hands and penis.

A good night to fap

>> No.3760616

What the fuck just happened in this thread.

>> No.3760618

>>3760599
How interesting!

I ejaculated all over my abdomen, and raveled in my orgasm for a few minutes. Afterwards, I wiped myself down with tissue paper. However, I seemed to have missed a few spots since there is dried semen caked upon my body. Well, it's nothing a shower can't fix.

>> No.3760627

Well we may as well discuss techniques to our masturbation, I aim for discreet and clean cumming.

The reason for the shorts is so I do not get lotion/semen stains on them, and without boxers It is easy to walk past others without them noticing I just masturbated.

When I am cumming into the trashcan, I usually pull shorts down so one leg is free and the other is still on shorts.
That way I can pull shorts up if anyone comes in or If I am in danger of being caught, and I have a easy aim to trashcan since I can use my free leg to position.
Not to mention the fact I wear non cloth shorts means lotion, and precum on my penis will not be bothersome, when I must wash.

>> No.3760641

>>3760072
in b4 *that*

>> No.3760642

When I am masturbating, I find using american snuff tobacco makes it more enjoyable.

I prefer grizzly Long cut Wintergreen, It has most nicotine.

I also have to rub my penis a bit to gather a erection after first cum, so I must alternate between gathering erection and masturbating when hard.

I have try opiates when masturbating, you are numb, and you can feel muscles in your hands getting exhausted from masturbating for so long at such a rate, but it feels so warm and well.

As for lube, I find using lotion to be cheap and easy, not to mention discreet, who would question lotion in bathroom?

The only problem I run into is I can smell semen since trashcan is next to bed, If I lay near it, but that is usually a non-issue as it is not that strong.

>> No.3760645

>>3760641
Oh, *that*! What are you talking about?

>> No.3760648

On that note:

I find lotion better, than just moving skin on penis up and down.

Sometimes I use penis skin technique when I wake up or I am in hurry and wish to not use lotion for laziness issues.

Such as before school, or on a day I must go enjoy time with friends.

It is not nearly as satisfactory...

>> No.3760650

Sorry if english is not good.

I am trying my best to make it proper!

>> No.3760654

As for why I aim to be discreet, I live in house with many people and I have no door.

I am not rich, so I live cheapest room I find.
I have not been caught yet!

>> No.3760658

So does any else want to share masturbation tips and experience?

>> No.3761012

>Daily Masturbation.

Shit, i need to fap at least thrice a day to not explode.

>> No.3761044

>>3761012
I prefer one long session and a lot of cum to 3 normal.

>> No.3761126

this is a horrible thread.

>> No.3762069

I came at the designated time in panties and thigh-highs :3c

>> No.3762082

>>3762069
>I came at the designated time in panties and thigh-highs :3c

FUND IT

>> No.3762085

thx op i came on witch and then she cackle at penis

>> No.3762100
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3762100

>>3762085
It's useless, it's all useless!
You didn't masturbate at all, you fake!

>> No.3762117
File: 67 KB, 251x226, beato blowjob.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3762117

>>3762085

>> No.3762132

Get the fuck out of /jp/.

>> No.3762135

I love you guys

>> No.3762137
File: 48 KB, 960x540, 1254934303638.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3762137

>>3762117
You moved to /jp/?

>> No.3762139

>>3760056
please stop spamming ＡｎｏｎＴａｌｋ .com thanks

>> No.3762142

So, I'm sitting here on my couch, which is pushed to my computer and the rest of the room is to my back. I'm watching TV and jacking off when I hear this really menacing cackle from behind me. I shit too many bricks to sit up and look behind me, so I just slowly moved my head to the left, where I saw my cat. It was staring either blankly or terrified, at the space right behind the couch, and perfectly frozen in a position I don't normally see it in. I just watched watched it, imagining what kind of evil it saw right behind me, but then I noticed something. It started stretching and contracting its back.

It was taking a shit, and the cackle was just it farting. It was staring because it was focusing. I nearly threw up trying to clean it up. God dammit.

>> No.3762153

It's not the Fleshlight's fault, really. Just the fact trying to use the one I ordered for my 34th birthday has rammed home the basic fact that I am a loser and that I am never going to get laid in my life.

I am apparently both too small and too big to use the Fleshlight. Small in the penis and big in the grossly overweight stomach. The result is that I apparently can't get very deep into the thing and experience the ribbing and other textures.

I ordered four inserts at once, three supertights with three sorts of textures -- wave, ribbed, bumped -- and one ultra tight. With all of them I have been having an incredible struggle to find a comfortable position to get in with my enormous stomach to allow using the thing long enough to get off. I apparently developed a way to masturbate by hand that deluded myself into thinking I was normal. I am obviously not. I can only seem to go about an inch and a half into this Fleshlight before my fat gets in the way and the smallness of my penis defeats the purpose. The incredible depression of the experience makes it hard for me to stay erect as the whole time I am thinking about what a deformed, out-of-shape loser I am, so I end up only half hard to less.

Today is my 34th birthday. I have never had a girlfriend in my life, due to being a shy fatass with an ugly skin condition that I was afraid of having anyone see by taking my clothes off. I am so incredibly fucking lonely and depressed. I just want to be able to hug a woman, to hold her in my arms. Sex is frankly secondary to me, which is lucky given that I haven't had any except with my own hand.

I bought this thing thinking I would treat myself and make myself happier, but it has just driven home how fucked I am. I guess my only hope is at this point is to find a woman who doesn't mind me only using oral sex on her because my penis obviously doesn't work very well.

>> No.3762238
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3762238

>>3762153

Cheer up bro, sex is for the needy.

>>
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