>upbeat generic music plays as the infomercial begins
Hi there, viewer! Anon Everyman here with Sabbath Incorporated! I'm here today to show you the answer to many of your problems. Some I'll bet you weren't even aware you had! What is this answer? What is this panacea for all your maladies? Well, well, well, my dear friend, I'm going to tell you.
That's right, we at Sabbath Inc are provide to you, our beloved consumer, with your very own little sister. And what's the best part, you're asking? We provide you your very own imouto free of charge!
"Impossible!" you may be saying! "Preposterous!" I hear from our audience! "God damn that's hot!" I hear from someone already making out with his own imouto in the corner over there! Yes, we all see you... and we see a satisfied customer!
I myself have five, count em, FIVE IMOUTO's!
>a picture comes up on screen with your beloved host with a loli on each arm, leg, and one more riding piggyback
And I've never been happier! But don't just take my word for it. Check out our website for thousands of positive customer reviews!
Now, I'm still hearing some dissent out there. What if they don't have the imouto that's right for me? My friend, we have little sisters of every stripe and color! Some with actual stripes! We've got centaur imouto's, snake imouto's, sheep imouto's! We've got goat imouto's! My personal favorite. If you can dream it, we have a little sister in stock that matches! Heck, we've got one that will literally become your dreams! So stop putting it off, stop making excuses. Call our Sabbath Inc hotline or walk in to your local Sabbath Inc branch headquarters and apply todaaaaaay!
>the studio audience erupts in applaud, as well as a few loud moans from audience members already with their own imouto, as upbeat music blares and the infomercial ends