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File: 550 KB, 960x720, 1241977460476.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2596286 No.2596286 [Reply] [Original]

ITT how to commit suicide in Gensokyo. Pic related.

>> No.2596294

- Burn yourself
- Ingest a poison
- Stab yourself
- Jump from a high height
- Drown yourself
- Suffocate yourself

>> No.2596307

-Threaten a human child's life in front of Keine
-Punch Mokou
-Punch Meiling
-Take food away from Yuyuko
-Call Yuyuko a fat sow.
-Bully Chen in front of Ran.
-Call Utsuho a birdbrain

>> No.2596310

1. Find a bullet
2. Walk into it

>> No.2596317
File: 808 KB, 1064x1495, 1237663107004.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2596317

Threaten Chen

>> No.2596319

>>2596286
death by youkai moe

>> No.2596320
File: 69 KB, 640x480, 393475af63d8d7045f6690f95ae77bf0.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2596320

>>2596310

FUUUUUUU-

>> No.2596342
File: 29 KB, 300x323, Hard_Gay_Valentines_HOOOOO_by_queues.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2596342

>>2596320

>> No.2596350
File: 16 KB, 435x320, yes.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2596350

>>2596319
Youkai moe.
Yes.

>> No.2596371
File: 100 KB, 572x567, 393475af63d8d7045f6690f95ae77bf0.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2596371

>>2596342

>> No.2596958

Stopm one of Yuka's flowers.
Call Yukari an old hag.
Brag about having money in front of Reimu.
Agree to become one of Eirin's experiments.

>> No.2597235
File: 290 KB, 1440x1024, 1206795334366.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2597235

>>2596958

Wait, that last one might actually be awesome.

>> No.2597244

>>2596286
Board on Komachi's boat.

>> No.2597255

Pissing off Yukari ain't gonna kill you. It's just that you'll meet a few tentacles. Yknow, in your ass and out of your mouth.

>> No.2597262

>>2597255

Or she'd reverse your borders and turn you inside out. Then your insides would be outside, and your outsides would be in.

>> No.2597267
File: 111 KB, 842x902, 3293682.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2597267

>>2597262
That's one nasty nightmare fuel right there.

>> No.2597284
File: 607 KB, 761x1075, 393475af63d8d7045f6690f95ae77bf0.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2597284

>>2597267

Oh, there's no reason to worry! Yukarin's a lovable old grandma! Always playing pranks.

>> No.2597290

I don't think a touhou could kill me.

>> No.2597291
File: 139 KB, 850x850, 393475af63d8d7045f6690f95ae77bf0.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2597291

>>2597267

She might even pop out of your closet one day!

>> No.2597296

>>2597291
>>2597290
I challenge her too the second I have a closet.

>> No.2597302

>>2597291
unfortunately for her, I'm the type that neither believe in the supernatural nor fear them

so she can either get back into the closet or I'll move over a bit for some space on my bed, get some sleep and talk in the morning

>> No.2597316

>>2597284
Where's her vagina?

>> No.2597324

>>2597302
having a tiny bed must be sad.

I got a California king I can sleep in any position I want and still share the bed.

>> No.2597327

>>2597302
So, you deny that youkai exist?

>> No.2597329

>>2597324
I'm in the goddamn woods with shitty wireless coverage, cut me some slack, no space for big beds.

>> No.2597330
File: 50 KB, 640x480, Umineko - Beatriceslashersmile.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2597330

>>2597302

>> No.2597335

>>2597327
I'm the other guy but yeah why not.

I've never seen one. According to my logic Alaskans don't exist either and you know what I'm still skeptical.

>> No.2597343
File: 584 KB, 1350x1200, 1497f21e9b4cb5b954271ca08fd1ffd0.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2597343

>>2597316
One of those eyeballs is her vagina.

>>2596307
Somehow I thought that call Utsuho a birdbrain would just confuse her given how stupid she is.

>> No.2597358
File: 304 KB, 900x800, c3ce4d1d65d71e158433371d2e7577ea.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2597358

>>2597335
It's easy to prove that youkai exist, you only have to show someone a youkai. Denying their existance is something else, just because you've never seen a youkai doesn't mean they don't exist.

>> No.2597360

>>2597296
>>2597302

Of course, this applies to Anons who -have- nice, dark, quiet closets for Yukarin to slip out of while they're sleeping and settle on their bodies.

But if you don't have one, never fear. You'll be going about your business as usual, and then a gap will open up under you. No one will ever know how you vanished.

>> No.2597366

>>2597358
yes it does.

>> No.2597371

>>2597358
They don't exist till we find droppings and prints.

>> No.2597374

>>2597358
Fantasy died for me about 2 years ago.

I realized magic doesn't exist and a situation where I'm special and apart of it never will even if it did.

I've been a happier person keeping fantasy as fantasy I must say.

>> No.2597377
File: 12 KB, 181x212, Umineko - Beatohead2.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2597377

>>2597366
Keep telling yourself that. *cackle**cackle*

>> No.2597379
File: 266 KB, 500x700, 891ad7fbd2f8c070120d21c762f7cb6f.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2597379

>>2597343
"Yeah, I am a bird, what do you want?"

>> No.2597383

>>2597379

And then the guy get obliterated by pure fusion energy once Utsuho's decided she's had enough of him wasting her time.


GOOD END

>> No.2597392

>>2597374
>a situation where I'm special and apart of it never will even if it did.
what the hell that means.

>> No.2597397

>>2597377
I PLAN ON IT!

>> No.2597404
File: 227 KB, 1024x768, ManRan.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2597404

I think getting yourself caught after stealing from Reimu's offering box would be a sure bet.

>> No.2597412

>>2597397
I'd love to see a fictional character and a person who doesn't believe in their existence argue.

>> No.2597416

>>2597404
Barf.

>> No.2597419

>>2597404
There isn't any donations in the offertory box, unless you count Yukari's 2000 yen in SaBND.

>> No.2597427

>>2596286
It's cute because of how uncertain she looks. "N..no..."

>> No.2597446

>>2597427
Hey ponpo-kun, you aren't Croatia you know.

>> No.2597487

>Punch Meiling

Actually, this isn't lethal. Meiling is one of the nicer Youkai who'll probably just knock you out, even if you were being rude and did it suddenly and not in a martial arts competition.

However, try and sneak past her into the Mansion may work better.

>> No.2597492

>>2597446
N..no...

>> No.2597494

>>2596310
Sorry bub. The most you'll ever get is a a bruised face and messed up hair.

>> No.2597555
File: 292 KB, 640x480, 1239561325327.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2597555

>>2597412
Last time I checked, that's exactly what happens in Umineko.

>> No.2598018

It will be possible to make a "Gensokyo" eventually. In a few hundreds years when virtual reality and AI gets much more advanced, you can create AIs that firmly believe that such creatures exists by creating a virtual world that accepts those powers or making them themselves have "supernatural" powers. Then accelerate time so it's history can develop and be verdict, and bam. Gensokyo is formed. Humans will be able to interact with such virtual worlds somehow, but I can't say to what extent.

>> No.2598040

>>2598018

>In a few hundreds years

Most of us already dead at that time,mon.

>> No.2598056

>>2598040
Then we must teach our children the wonders of Gensokyo so their descendants may one day recreate it!
Wait... shit.

>> No.2598082
File: 18 KB, 516x339, 1241072553847.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2598082

>>2598056
Now I get it! This is all a conspiracy set up by the NHK to prevent this future!

>> No.2598093
File: 54 KB, 256x217, Dragoheh.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2598093

>>2598040

Sucks for you bro.

>> No.2598109
File: 1.13 MB, 1120x840, 1237136638225.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2598109

>>2597487

Exactly. Punching Meiling is bound to hurt, but it's likely entirely harmless in the long run.
At worst, first you'll suffer a broken wrist. Second you'll suffer embarassment as she politely offers to help with the splint, possibly pinning you down and applying it herself while making small talk in a slow and child-friendly voice if you refuse.
And youkai or not, as a martial artist Meiling is on a pretty strict diet. If you trust her dialogue, miko are the only humans she's allowed to eat.

If you desperately want to die in a quick and simple way, just offer either of the oni a coke and claim it's grog.

>> No.2598118

>>2598109
Hmm. On either Suika or Yugi, I think that you are either deranged or ignorant on what TRUE booze is. Then they will try to indoctrinate you on the fine art of drinking until you pass out.

>> No.2598124

>>2598118
*They might think you are

>> No.2598171
File: 742 KB, 946x709, 1237140300872.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2598171

>>2598118

Hmm... on second thought, good point. Those two seem too happy to party to throw away a chance like that.

Although if you DO manage to annoy Suika, you'll most certainly die as a tiny dot at the bottom of a fist print visible from the moon.

>> No.2598190

>>2598118
death by alcohol poisoning

>> No.2598210
File: 1.69 MB, 840x985, Anti yukkuri!.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2598210

Not take it easy. Nobody knows what happens then, for those missing have never been recovered...

>> No.2598225
File: 558 KB, 1000x1100, 1238602886506.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2598225

Or if a memorable ending isn't important to you...

Go into the woods. Never come out.

>> No.2598262
File: 308 KB, 605x605, 1235383214256.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2598262

Play with Flandre.

>> No.2598292
File: 43 KB, 325x325, Is-That-Not-So.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2598292

>>2598225
The last words you say:

"I don't want to die!"

The last words you hear:

"Is that so~?"

>> No.2598310

>>2597412

Read Dr. 13's Architecture and Mortality, from DC. It's a comic about that, basically.

>> No.2598389

>>2598109

> Second you'll suffer embarassment as she politely offers to help with the splint, possibly pinning you down and applying it herself while making small talk in a slow and child-friendly voice if you refuse.

I would die just from that. How humiliating would it be treated like a kid that did a naughty thing by a beautiful woman, especially if people are watching.

>> No.2600206
File: 280 KB, 540x640, 393475af63d8d7045f6690f95ae77bf0.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2600206

>>2598109

>implying that your punch would connect

Unless you're Solid Snake or Big Boss in the flesh, I highly doubt your blow would even have a chance of touching a highly trained expert in martial arts like Meiling.
If anything, she'd intercept your strike without even letting you score a hit, choke-slam you to the ground and shatter your spine in several places, paralyzing you from the neck down. You'd be unable to breathe, and within the hour you'd asphyxiate.

Then Orin would come by and take your corpse away in a little cart.

>> No.2600346
File: 198 KB, 983x768, okanon.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2600346

>>2600206
I have benquoed in danmaku, so I believe my fist would connect, anonymous.

>> No.2600358

Jump into the lake

>> No.2600375

>>2596317
There's a yukkuri in there somewhere.

>>
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