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/jp/ - Otaku Culture

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File: 322 KB, 659x1448, yukaribath.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2490475 No.2490475 [Reply] [Original]

Yukari wants you to join her in the bath.


>> No.2490481


>> No.2490485


>> No.2490487


As much as I'd love to see her naked, I don't trust her.

>> No.2490488


I simply cannot trust her.

>> No.2490489

I don't bathe.

>> No.2490492
File: 364 KB, 1000x800, yukari nude.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]


>> No.2490493

[x] jump into the lake.

>> No.2490494


>> No.2490495

Yeah, why not, what do I really have that's worth holding on to?

>> No.2490498

Go be old somewhere else, hag.

>> No.2490499

No, she will gap shit into my ass

>> No.2490500

No way man. I'm not getting my own penis gapped up my ass.

>> No.2490502

You're not going to let me say no, are you? Why did I even let you close enough to ask?

>> No.2490506

Only if Ran and/or Chen is there too.

>> No.2490507

...Another hivemind?

>> No.2490508
File: 550 KB, 1000x1000, bath.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

lookin kinda Teresa there Yukari

>> No.2490516
File: 191 KB, 1115x800, 87cceabb397b1e828b832d482452804936dd433c.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Yukari and I are actually the same person, so I'd be taking a bath with myself.

>Yo dawg, we heard you liked causal loops so we put yourself with yourself so you can bathe while you bathe

>> No.2490521
File: 249 KB, 800x592, 1239922847909.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Please....I'm...I'm not a hag...

>> No.2490525

Y. I'd take the risk.

>> No.2490530

I know this trick. You're trying to make me feel bad so I'll get in with you, and then the next thing I know there's a large object lodged in my rectum.

It's working ;_;

>> No.2490537


Worth the risk.

>> No.2490542
File: 696 KB, 1000x933, yukari nude2.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

I just want someone to help me wash my back.

>> No.2490546

Well I guess I could use a bath...
And one just can not let such hospitality go to waste, that would be rude.

>> No.2490551
File: 78 KB, 600x355, 1240016107910.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Your colleagues are looking for you hag.

>> No.2490552


What happened to Chen and Ran? Did they give you the finger and vanish when you brought this idea up?

>> No.2490556

Only if I get to stick it up Chen

>> No.2490558

Ok, ok fine. I'll do it. But I'm washing your back and then I'm out, ok?

>> No.2490564
File: 227 KB, 768x1024, 1426823.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

You guys...really do think I am some wrinkled old hag...don't you...

>> No.2490570

WTF'S wrong with Chen in that picture

>> No.2490574

ewww get those nasty milkbag fat deposits away from me

>> No.2490576

I never said that. But I still don't trust you.

>> No.2490582

sorry babe, if you're more than 8 we can't procreate

>> No.2490587
File: 146 KB, 695x950, 1790386.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Thanks. It'll be fun!

>> No.2490591

sage for role playing.

>> No.2490593

Ok, time to put on my robe and wizard hat.

>> No.2490595
File: 98 KB, 203x286, 1240124340208.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

I-It's not like we were being serious, y-you know...

>> No.2490600


Notice that no tripfag started this. Also, I am pointedly being out-of-character in this thread for just that reason

Lovely weather tonight, wouldn't you say? It's clear and cool.

>> No.2490605

Gah you fucking faggot, it's always "ANON/TRIPFAG" with you.

Why can't we just love each other?

>> No.2490607

Sure is ZOMG ANON PERSECUTING TRIPFAGS complex around here.

>> No.2490611
File: 25 KB, 331x302, 1236038213282.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>This is a roleplay thread so I won't bump it, too bad for you guys. Just telling you guys that.

>> No.2490614
File: 259 KB, 660x660, 883952e5ba829663e015f7bdba9af5d7.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>old wrinkled hag

>> No.2490613


Tripfags should be persecuted and run out of town with torches and pitchforks.

>> No.2490624


Secure tripcodes are for fags.

Tripcodes are for jerks.

Moot agreed, don't bother him about it.

>> No.2490626
File: 48 KB, 307x400, Robespierre.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

I suggest public execution. With guillotines involved, obviously.

>> No.2490638
File: 164 KB, 864x1134, 3559083.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Don't call them hags, they are mature women.

>> No.2490649
File: 170 KB, 600x800, 1626410.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

After repeated insults of her being called an old, wrinkled, hag something happens you'd thought you would never, ever see.....Yukari begins to sob. Crying into her hands you hear her stuttering out, "I'm...n..not a hag..."

What now?

>> No.2490651

[x] Love tenderly

>> No.2490653
File: 24 KB, 300x400, 1221084377823.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

I say "Fascinating". And then I rest my face against my palm.

>> No.2490662


>> No.2490670

If she were sobbing, I would hug her softly and tell her that she was a beautiful woman.

>> No.2490672

quite the predictable one eh, Anonymous?

>> No.2490674


Maximilien Robespierre, you are a fine young dandy, how about leading the 4chan Revolution?

>> No.2490678

Aww hell, here comes ruby falls!

>> No.2490683
File: 261 KB, 731x1000, yukarihappy.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]


>> No.2490688

lolitroll'd yu

>> No.2490689

These threads suck. I mean, if you were clever, you could make it work. But you're not clever!

>> No.2490691

I'd hug her and apologize.

And then find out it was an elaborate troll on her part to gap things into my ass

>> No.2490692
File: 87 KB, 550x450, 1237707038937.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>> No.2490702

And what if there was no clever ploy or underhandedness in her crying? What if it was genuine?

>> No.2490708

It's the JUST AS PLANNED/DICTATOR OF GENSYOKO Yukari. Around here, you never relax.

>> No.2490709

The only thing genuine with Yukari are her ulterior motives. You must always suspect. Anything less will have you killed.

>> No.2490713

In my case if it were genuine? I'd just hug her more. Yukari is love, and she deserves our love.

>> No.2490718

I'd have no way of knowing if it was genuine, so I'd always be on guard. Come on, it's Yukari.

If I was 100% sure it was genuine by some otherworldy power, see >>2490713

>> No.2490731

as if trusting a youkai is a good idea


>> No.2490738

You are the kind of people whom leave Yukari lonely. Always assuming she's scheming something when all she wants is a hug, nothing more.

>> No.2490740
File: 419 KB, 1127x807, 124010416259.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>Anon participating in a roleplaying thread calling another roleplaying anon an idiot

>> No.2490745

what is hank hill's connection here?

>> No.2490746

>oh noes, any sort of context confuses me

>> No.2490751


in b4 PROPANE.

>> No.2490754

That was a really shitty comeback.

>> No.2490759

Propane and propane accessories

>> No.2490765

because it wasn't one

>> No.2490773

You're right. Usually a comeback has to make sense for it to be considered one.

>> No.2490776
File: 76 KB, 600x704, 3e6f1efc3a524a6e992c246bca51e161.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Wash my back?


>> No.2490784

Indeed, derailment failed though.

>> No.2490790


She's wearing men's briefs.


>> No.2490797
File: 42 KB, 173x198, 1240121603976.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Y-You've been nothing but mean to Anoymous, he'll n-never trust you.

>> No.2490800
File: 1.63 MB, 1024x903, yukaribed.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Yukari then, after her bath, asks you to help her into bed and tuck her in.


>> No.2490801


You know that hole thewy have in the front of those things? She wants you to fill her gap.

>> No.2490808

Alice you're the only one for me.

>> No.2490813

Heyell yeah boys, Ima get me some strange! WHOOO!

Now which side you want me on?

>> No.2490822


I go about this normally with no intentions for it to go any further then leave.

>> No.2490825

Yesyesyesyesyes oh dear god yes

>> No.2490850

I heard Yukari can make gaps in the barrier between fantasy and reality. i.e., she can make fictional characters real.

Does this mean she can make herself and Touhou real?!

>> No.2490857
File: 42 KB, 500x500, 1236290338213.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]


>> No.2490863

It's like schrodinger's cat, or like taking a speed of light ride through a black hole.

I would rather Lovecraft's entities existed. I'm pretty sick of humanity, and this thread is pretty solid evidence of why. Let 'em wipe us out.

>> No.2490865

But as you leave she grabs your hand gently and softly asks if you would spend the night with her....in her bed.

>> No.2490866


That's nice, dear.

>> No.2490874

there is no boundary between reality and illusion, either something is real or it's not, its boolean, boundaries only exist in planes that are contiguous or division in a continuous plane, 1D is an exception, it has no boundaries, 2D is represented by a line, 3D is a 3D line etc

when it comes to reality however, boundaries don't really exist, the so called boundaries we see are either non-physical (sky line, nation border) or physical

the physical boundary is a special case, the boundary do not exist for the sake of existence but it's rather a side effect of the physical law, the surface of water is caused by gravity, relative mass between water and the surrounding elements and the physical difference between the molecular structure of water and it's surroundings, a physical boundary can be defined as a plane where elements on one side is physically different than what's on the other side

>> No.2490882

>But as you leave she grabs your hand gently and softly asks if you would spend the night with her.... so she can have dinner.


>> No.2490887


I would politely turn her invitation down stating that I do not believe that I deserve to lay by an exquisite lady such as herself and tell her she would deserve better. I give her a wave, say goodnight and then leave.

>> No.2490888


I don't know if I like the way she's hiding her crotch with the washrag like that.


>> No.2490933
File: 23 KB, 250x291, matrix_architect-keanu.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]


>> No.2490959
File: 122 KB, 800x286, yukaripissed.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]


Not my brain Yukari!!! I have mental problems!!!

>> No.2490973

After helping her bathe, helping her to bed and then tucking her in, she turns around and eats me?

I knew my niceness would get me screwed over one day.

>> No.2490979

You forgot to cook dinner that's why, just ask Sakuya to rewind time.

>> No.2491003
File: 12 KB, 361x245, Dat_ass.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]


>> No.2491009

She never asked for dinner. I assumed Ran made it.

To hell with this, I'm dead now.

>> No.2491011


I've always known Anon was a TUFF GUY, especially on the internet. But for some reason, I can't see him being ballsy enough to cut chunks of his own flesh off and stir-fry them for Yukari.

He'd exsanguinate himself part-ways in anyway.

>> No.2491017

well see if Ran was around, she wouldn't need you to bath her, or tuck her in now would she

it's a elaborate trap to savour a delicacy

>> No.2491035
File: 45 KB, 576x432, Goddamn I hate you you fucking double niggering shit fencing anal cunt..jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Well it's glad to know that I smoke so I probably tasted like straight up shit. I hope Yukari enjoyed it thoroughly the bitch.

>> No.2491038
File: 126 KB, 338x480, portrait_of_charles_dexter_ward.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

I'm coming for ya, baby!!

>> No.2491042


Yukari's sense of taste is different from normal humans'.

>> No.2491053

You aren't going to let me have the last laugh are you?

>> No.2491063

so what, where is it said that yukari eats humans?

>> No.2491066
File: 30 KB, 328x438, 2068fc0b0cb877aa461d8b81ac33077b6aa2efb3.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]


>Well it's glad to know that I smoke so I probably tasted like straight up shit

Mmm, smoked meat.

>> No.2491069


You're about as sharp as a bowling ball, aren't you? Canonically, humans are the staple food for youkai. Babaa-chan is a youkai.

Of course, there are some of you who are hell-bent on portraying Gensokyo as a utopian, eternally happy place where youkai never eat humans and instead have tea and biscuits with them.
You will go to any lengths to defend this point, too - after all, there was this one chucklefuck trying to say that humans were probably just a delicacy that actually tasted abhorrent to youkai.

>> No.2491070

C'mon, we can dream, can't we? T_T

>> No.2491071

>>2491069 Of course, there are some of you who are hell-bent on portraying Gensokyo as a utopian, eternally happy place where youkai never eat humans and instead have tea and biscuits with them.
Like ZUN.

>> No.2491092

Does alice eat humans? She's a youkai, but she was previously a human. That'd border on cannibalism.

I think the possibility of being eaten makes Gensokyo more wondrous. Humans befriending such dangerous creatures, moreso. But I think the youkai that eat humans are mostly based on animals.

It's not clear what Yukari is. If she "ate" humans at all, it'd probably be in a less animalistic way, consuming their soul or something god-like.

>> No.2491094

Yukari says she has humans in her larder. Just because she has tea with Raymoo doesn't mean hat she doesn't treat other humans as food.

>> No.2491098

Youkai is a general term for a supernatural being, this can be anything from man-eating grotesque monsters, to humans who gain magical powers, to dangerous children of demi-gods, beings born from meta-physical desires and pets of powerful aspects. There are both good and evil, harmful and harmless, intelligent and stupid, just as people are varied, so are youkai.

Although they are dangerous to people, they aren't the worst since they are almost right at the bottom of the power heirarchy.

>> No.2491115

Also, in gensokyo, all humans know that they reincarnate, so it's not as big a deal. I mean, you still lose everything you are, your memories of your past life etc.

The big time youkai who eat humans are probably relatively kind and gentle with their prey, gently explaining that sorry, we have to eat you. You're delicious, this won't hurt, etc...

Then you get to go hang out with Yuyuko for a few years until you're reincarnated.

>> No.2491185

>Then you get to go hang out with Yuyuko for a few years until you're reincarnated.
But yes, that depend on your doings in the world. It's up to Sikieiki to decide you go to hell or just standby at Hakugyokuro. Cause we know, Anonymous doesn't deserve a place in heaven

>> No.2491224
File: 330 KB, 607x675, bath time.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Whens the last time any of you bathed?
Go get in the shower. I promise it'll feel nice.

>> No.2491230

I bathe twice a day. That's the awesome thing about someone live in the equator. they have reasons to take a bath

>> No.2491242

I think Alice places more interest in beating up humans
rather than eating them.

>> No.2491246


Torturing them to death, also.


Do you usually apologize to a steak on your plate before consuming it?

>> No.2491247

but if you live in the equator why would you want to?

>> No.2491254

It's hot and sticky there.

>> No.2491273

If Yukari bumped off Reimu, she might have to do something resembling work.

>> No.2491301

yep. my parents are fucking crazy conspiracy end-of-the-world types, and we keep animals that we eat. i've had to kill chickens before... I always try to keep them calm while I'm preparing, petting them and stuff, and I make the cut quick and clean.

>> No.2491321

I'm already there arn't I?

I'm already in the bath because she'd put me there without my prior permission.

Anyway, I pray to god she lets me get my swimsuit trunks on. Don't want her seein my massive boner. That'd be embarrassing.

>> No.2491331

You are a good person.

>> No.2491338


>Don't want her seein my massive boner. That'd be embarrassing.

She's well over centuries old, there's surely nothing you've got that she hasn't seen at least four times before.

Unless you are an alien, of course.

>> No.2491340


I don't like telling anyone this, but I AM from beyond the stars.

I just came from the "Fat" stars.

>> No.2491360

She spends most of the time asleep, though, so it's questionable.

>> No.2491364


She sleeps, she's not blind.

>> No.2491367

or IS she?

>> No.2491374


hurr hurr hurr

>> No.2491404

arc you got some stupid on ya

>> No.2491413


Yes, that's the direct result of talking to Anons. Let me just wipe that off...

>> No.2491442

stupid doesn't wipe off.

you have to boil it out.

>> No.2491775

Yes. Because I can't beat the game to see her outside the bath.

>> No.2492844
File: 172 KB, 640x445, 1037884.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>The big time youkai who eat humans are probably relatively kind and gentle with their prey, gently explaining that sorry, we have to eat you. You're delicious, this won't hurt, etc...

I'm sure Yuka says this all the time.