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[Anonymous No.]

Please leave a message after the tone.
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[Anonymous No.]

Moshi moshi jesus desu

[Anonymous No.]

>>22615985
The fingers you are using are too fat to dial this phone

[Anonymous No.]

>>22616008
Hi Patchy!

[Anonymous No.]

>>22615985

[Anonymous No.]

>>22616003
Hello!
>>22616008
Why would you leave a message like that!?
>>22616012
Sorry, wrong number!
>>22616256
The dastardly Koi will try and prank call her sister!

[Anonymous No.]

Due to the adverse weather conditions, your Cucumbers delivery will be a few days late this week. We are sorry for the inconvenience. We recommend re-using some of your old ones.

[Anonymous No.]

Uh yeah this is uh, your neighbor again, I spoke to you a few weeks ago, I think, about your dog fouling on my lawn and you said that you were going to deal with it but uhhh, my husband, well both of us really, we looked out last night and we think we saw, I mean we're not sure but, it looked like you were squatting on our lawn and when we went out this morning there was some "mess" there and you know, maybe you tried picking up after your dog and missed some, you know it's not always easy to see in the uhhh dark like that but uhhh... to be honest we didn't even see your dog anywhere, in fact I don't think we've ever seen it but it must be a big one just by the evidence on our la- look, anyway, please just take care to make sure that you properly you know, clean up after yourself, I mean, your dog, please and thank you. Also we just wanted to say thank you for the Christmas card, it was very charming! We hung it up on the side of our bin! Hope you have a nice christmas and we'll see you around!

[Anonymous No.]

>>22617074
the entire plot of SA is essentially just HOA punishing the komeiji household for not keeping their pets in line

[Anonymous No.]

I am in your house.

[Anonymous No.]

I love you!

[Anonymous No.]

Satorin loves Koishi-chan.
But does Koishi-chan love Satorin?

[Anonymous No.]

>>22620830
what if koishi actually hates satori and she closed her third eye so she'd never find out?

[Anonymous No.]

>>22620851
Koishi would never be mean to her sister! She's just naive!
Take that bowling ball! She heard from Eirin that if you survive an infection your body will be better prepared for it in the future! So she took it one step further and thought the more pain someone endures the less likely they are to be harmed!
Koishi's using that bowling ball because she thinks it'll make Satorin's bone stronger than steel!!

[Anonymous No.]

>>22620851
Does that mean we never met the real Koishi as she already suppressed her real personality and emotions by the time we meet her in SA? That begs the question of how different Koishi was back then.

She must have been super traumatized and insecure if she was driven to close her Third Eye like that! I wanna see Koishi crying and groveling at my feet when I bully her and discriminate against her species and her entire existence!

[Anonymous No.]

>>22621334
Koishi is not for bully!!!

[Anonymous No.]

>>22621246
>Take that bowling ball! She heard from Eirin that if you survive an infection your body will be better prepared for it in the future! So she took it one step further and thought the more pain someone endures the less likely they are to be harmed!
people should really think twice about trying to teach koishi things

[Anonymous No.]

>>22621334
if satori is sullen and withdrawn i can imagine koishi was that taken to the extreme
the grief she felt was enough to make her close her third eye so koishi was probably extremely fucked up

[Anonymous No.]

>>22623605
It can't be helped, sometimes she sees information where there shouldn't be!

[Anonymous No.]

>>22623616
https://en.touhouwiki.net/wiki/虚
Diao ye zong made a mini album about that. This is the first track:
https://youtu.be/zL7NyuBzlSM

[Anonymous No.]

>>22623631
>(implicado)

[Anonymous No.]

>>22623776
Who are you quoting?

[Anonymous No.]

>>22623631
>medicine that turn people to idiots
tfw koishi will never administer that to you

[Anonymous No.]

>>22623605
>people should really think twice about trying to teach koishi things
But it worked in DBZ.

[Anonymous No.]

>>22623855
But why would you want such a thing, anon? Sure, Koishi may be doing it because she loves you, but shouldn't you teach her better ways of showing how much she cares about you?

[Anonymous No.]

>>22623631
>>22623985
That Eirin is really cute, especially her eyes.

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

>>22624083
GAH
FUCK
KILL IT

[Anonymous No.]

>>22624145
That's not very nice of you, anon.

[Anonymous No.]

>>22624164
Maybe he was referring to the arm.

[Anonymous No.]

>>22624177
That doesn't make it any less rude!!!!!!!

[Anonymous No.]

>>22624164
Using a hat as a bowl is a very Koishi thing to do

[Anonymous No.]

Koishi keeping the holiday spirit up!

[Anonymous No.]

>>22624083
my hat is my friend
it helps me relax

[Anonymous No.]

>>22624083
I thought she was showing her lewd black panties!

[Anonymous No.]

>>22624607
Koishi is NOT a lewd girl!

[Anonymous No.]

>>22624083
Imagine being this thing's psychiatrist

[Anonymous No.]

>>22627865
but she can be

[Anonymous No.]

>>22630147

[Anonymous No.]

>>22629949

[Anonymous No.]

Spiffy Koi ready for her date!

[Anonymous No.]

She my trap queen, let her hit the bando, ayy
We be counting up, watch how far them bands go, ayy

[Anonymous No.]

>>22634295
That waistcoat looks marvelous on her!

[Anonymous No.]

>>22635150
Formal Koishi is cute! CUTE!

[Anonymous No.]

>>22615985
damm

[Anonymous No.]

Koish would probably be a-ok being on the receiving end of scat

[Anonymous No.]

>>22615985
>"The flashing light was just a test. You'll have plenty of warning next time. "

[Anonymous No.]

Would koishi be a viable gf?

[Anonymous No.]

>>22643509
if you can work around the "instantly forget her" part and be okay with her wandering around your local area for days at a time without contact, yes

[Anonymous No.]

>>22643568
if i have to have a gf, that's ideal
even better is not having one of course

[Anonymous No.]

I just want to save this retard

https://youtu.be/O4gkUvFShgI

[Anonymous No.]

>>22644513
From what?

[Anonymous No.]

>>22623631
Oh, I'm suddenly reminded of a doujin where Koishi decided to give Satori a death by hanging as a birthday gift.

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

>>22623631
That was really cute, Koishi looks kinda like Osaka.

[Anonymous No.]

>>22647399
Kumada's Koishi's are pretty cute, indeed.

[Anonymous No.]

>>22647399
Kumada's Koishis are pretty cute, indeed.

[Anonymous No.]

>>22644513
From her tragic, inescapable fate.
I can't do anything about it.

[Anonymous No.]

>>22643509
Not at all

[Anonymous No.]

>>22644986
what is this bloodborne old hunters shit?

[Anonymous No.]

This is for Sanae you big fat white nasty smelling fat bitch why you took me off the motherfucking schedule with your trifling dirty white racist ass you big fat bitch oompa loompa body ass bitch I'm coming outside and I'm going to beat the fuck out of you bitch and don't even call the shrine maiden today because I'm gonna come unexpected and wait on yo motherfucking ass bitch.

[Anonymous No.]

>>22617074
Thank you! Hope you enjoy the drawing!
>>22619779
Enjoy your stay!
>>22620390
I love you too!
>>22651486
Wrong number! Your message will be relayed to Sanae after appropriate modifications have been made!

[Anonymous No.]

Onee-chan.... scary.... scary....

[Anonymous No.]

>>22651955
Me on the left

[Anonymous No.]

Gorgeous Koi!

[Anonymous No.]

>>22656938
But she's always gorgeous

[Anonymous No.]

>>22651535
Noah draws a creepy chibi koish

[Anonymous No.]

>>22659812
Looks cute and innocent to me.

[Anonymous No.]

>>22643509
>viable
Short answer: after putting in a tremendous amount of work that surpasses even the one done by her own sister, you may get someone you can start a possible, albeit idiosyncratic, relationship with.

Long answer: you're starting with someone who barely remembers anything and has a high chance of being forgotten, the habit of turning invisible and roaming wherever she pleases and an unpredictable "personality" devoid of emotions and driven by her unconscious instincts that results in morbid comments.
In this state, it's impossible for her "to love". You'd need to have her open her third eye, which entails convincing someone capricious like her that going back to a life where everyone hates you is self-evidently the more pleasurable option. Good luck fighting against that pleasure principle.
But the hurdles don't stop there. Even if she were to open her third eye, all of the problems of her previous life would resurface. And now she's got her actual personality back, which we can infer to be emotionally fragile. Moreover, you can say goodbye to any strategy that relies on feel-good speeches, because Koishi can now detect any lie of yours, so you can't even keep negative thoughts to yourself: you have to work on your earnest personality so that she can always find a source of positiveness and meaningfulness in yourself, as you're the anchor of her mental wellness in her life.
There's also a big disparity that makes the very bond complicated: one is a mind reader, the other is not. So Koishi is always going to anticipate your thoughts, while you can't say the same about her mind. This isn't solely a problem of fluid conversation: Koishi can formulate thoughts on you as a whole, but you're limited to what Koishi says in front of you, so your thoughts could get "boring".
A work-around could be becoming a mind reader yourself (magicians aside, are there instances in Touhou where a human becomes a "codified" youkai? Not a generic one like Ichirin or the jinyou, just a traditional satori), so you can exchange thoughts and feelings spontaneously and immediately (the obvious downside being her same awful fate).
So, after all this effort (mindreading acquired or not), you can now attempt to mantain a stable relationship, where you've got to be a person who's sincerely positive and yet full of interesting surprises.
I don't know if this counts as "viable".
But I'd count it as "worth it".

[Anonymous No.]

>>22660467
how to become a satori? asking for an imaginary friend

[Anonymous No.]

>>22660570
Who knows if it's possible. I guess the change would be quite traumatic for an unaccustomed brain though.

[Anonymous No.]

>>22660739
I once had a dream where me and Satori were in a grocery store and there was a mad scientist who had these little brains with sharp pegs for stems, one for each of us, Satori's had basically everything pruned off it except the center and lower-back bits, while mine was just a smallish brain, he managed to nab Satori and stab hers into the center of her skull which turned her into a drooling idiot, then he possessed her and came after me. I ran at first but as I saw one too many sheeple dawdling about the store I came walking back to see controlled-Satori doubled over clutching her head and pulled her brain-stick out and we dealt with the guy I guess can't remember after that.

[Anonymous No.]

Wakey wakey

[Anonymous No.]

Would you let Koishi be your barber?

[Anonymous No.]

>>22665653
God I wished I could see her big green bush looking from below.

[Anonymous No.]

>>22667912
>barber
She's going to kill someone eventually, no doubt.

[Anonymous No.]

>>22668181
They're going to die from SHOCK when they see what Koishi has done to their hair!

[Anonymous No.]

>>22672078
Yo
Real talk
Never go to places like great clips
Fuck these joints

[Anonymous No.]

>>22668181
sweeny todd?