Touhou Conspiracy Theories

[Anonymous No.]

Post conspiracy theories here, preferably your own.

Gensokyo is real, and we all have a hand in maintaining it.
The Touhou series started as a contingency plan created in collaboration between ZUN and the sages. The popularity of the games provides an alternative source of faith/belief from outsiders that will keep Gensokyo alive in case shit hits the fan. As a tradeoff, the more they depend on us, the more they are affected by fan interpretations.

[Anonymous No.]

>>21983715
The lunar capital faked the moon landings so that the earthings would fuck off

[Anonymous No.]

Reimu is actually rich from gold stolen from every incident that happened.
She only pretends to be poor because of the sympathy and attention she gets from it from the 2hus around her.

[Anonymous No.]

>>21983718
It was a war actually
A war that only they acknowledge and also don’t acknowledge. Thats how hard they had their shit kicked in.

What if I told you the craters on the moon weren't created by 14 Billion year-old space debris, but rather the Lunarian Mortars?
The Lunarian Capital is known far and wide for being superior to Earth in almost every way, though being a few hundred thousand miles/kilometers away and led by two retards.
Despite the ancient age of the Earth and Moon, surely one would think they would be untouched in an almost orderly Solar System, but no. Not only has the Moon been defiled, but it has been a grave yard for nearly the entire Lunarian Army.
At this point, people will ask "how?" or "why?" and expect to get a full run down of the thing from the natives themselves, but no. They won't. Not only are the common "Cute Little Lunarian Bunny" citizens so uninformed to the point of retardation, but they are also lazy despite their constant slave-working by the Watatsuki sisters.
The only one who could have told the story is currently in Gensokyo and goes by the name "Reisen Udongein Inaba".
There is no way you'll ever get an answer from her, let alone find and acquire her assistance since leaving her allies to die when she escaped in the middle of the massacre. To this day, she still suffers from PTSD.
Starting from the beginning, there was once a time when all native Earthlings lived on Earth and all was fine. All until certain events took place, and a "not so small" group of people decided the Earth was becoming too "impure", so they came together to devise a plan to go elsewhere, and as we know, they went to the moon, and dubbed themselves Lunarians.
Nobody knows what happened between that time and now, but we do know of the recent events that have taken place. Like a certain "invasion" as they call it, that happened from 1969 - 1972, which marked the beginning of 6 "invasions" which took place. All we know is that two humans, yes, two /humans/, decided to go and plant a flag on the moon. A flag with 50 stars, and 13 stripes held up on a pole in the vast emptiness that is the surface of the moon and dark empty sky that is space. One could see this as claiming unmarked and unowned territory, and they would be right, however, they were met with unfriendly forces upon their arrival.
The unfriendly denizens of the moon looked more like humanized rabbits, and at a glance, would be seen as small, cute and harmless- until you saw they were carrying weapons. And charging. Right at you and the flag like a bunch of savages. For rather cute creatures, they were rather barbaric.
After planting the flag on the moon, the humans appeared to be dancing, and riding in some kind of contraption with four wheel-like structures attached to it whilst going back to the same location every now and then. Probably taking pictures or something.
After seeing something like that, surely the head Lunarians would think twice before attacking a possibly more advanced and possibly unknown species, but no. They went on and attacked like a bunch of fucking retards. And with that, is how it all began.
We know not what the "invasion" was like, but the Royal Cocksucking Sisters call it "The War", leading us to our topic, the first "Lunarian War"- in which they lost horrobly. Spoiler Alert.
The losses were grim.
For them of course.
The Lunarians lost such a large chunk of their army that "...there aren't many left..." -Yorihime Watatsuki. And that isn't the half of it. The two /humans/ who invaded left with nothing but small blemishes that'll go away in a week or two, as the Lunar Army lost <Thousands> of their soldiers. Yes you heard me right, <THOUSANDS>. The ENTIRE LUNARIAN ARMY against two friendly humans. TWO humans and they LOST! You're telling me that an entire force of the moon, over six arrivals by the same two humans in four (4) years and multiple flags, resulted the DEATHS of the MAJORITY of the LUNARIAN ARMY, much so to a point where their forces are cripped to a point to where they can take on Gensokyo, just barely, when four Gensokian denizens put a stop to a GODDESS OF HELL, a PURE incarnation of HATRED and a HELL FAIRY who managed to fucking terrorize them to a point of having to INVADE GENSOKYO, as well as TOTAL EVACUATION of the Moon, into ANOTHER realm which they didn't even know they had entered on their own will as a trap- and they couldn't even manage to so much as give two friendly, non hostile HUMANS a hard fight? Not to mention it took them fucking decades- DECADES to get rid of an UNGUARDED flag? WHAT! You afraid the Youkai in the shadows are gonna snatch your ankles if you get within 50 feet of the flag? You scared you'll turn to dust if you touch it? Go blind if you so much as glance at it? Grow the FUCK up.

[Anonymous No.]

>>21983715
If you want to know where gensokyo is take the list of possible entrances and check the number of missing persons in each area

well
my conspiracy theory is that many missing persons are actually taken to gensokyo to be consumed. Yokai need to eat and the human village is necessary for faith/belief
hence they need a disbelieving outside source of humans: modern world

[Anonymous No.]

>>21983715
How about we write our own conspiracy theories if
>Gensokyo...interpretations
is true here

[More Written Cancer No.]

-The Unwritten History of Humans and Youkai
-Entry: Hakurei —
-Author: Anonymous-Unofficial Timeline 4
Scroll 1 of 2

*ripped scroll begins here* Reimu invited everyone to a party and snuck off with anon whom she purposely got shitfaced to the levels of ultra blackout authorize a marriage and abruptly ride him through the night and place him somewhere obvious when finished and make it seem like he drank too much and passed out in an alternate timeline. That or he challenged Suika to a drinking challenge and got fucked by Reimu. Either way, it’s unclear what happened.
Reimu continued to be Reimu and suddenly start staying indoors more often and calling in sick, leaving Marisa to do all of the work and Anon will keep being Anon(?).
Upon the unveiling of the successor to the bloodline, Depression.EXE kicked in and Anon will off’d himself b̶e̶c̶a̶u̶s̶e̶ ̶Y̶u̶k̶a̶r̶i̶ ̶Y̶a̶k̶u̶m̶o̶ ̶k̶i̶l̶l̶e̶d̶ ̶h̶i̶m̶ since Reimu is his waifu and all will continue as normal. Except mini-Reimu. She was a unique carbon copy Reimu but is also part Anon as well.
Anon was not a Native to Gensokyo. Anon was a NEET. Not any NEET, but a /jp/NEET. A NEET might be useless but they have the most potential to be the force to be reckoned with-- The most dangerous force in the Universe..! However, a /jp/NEET is a rare variation that carries unmatched levels of knowledge across any and all fields with reasoning only rivaled by the brightest of minds to come once an era in Gensokyo. /jp/NEETs don't only carry knowledge but also carry the weight of being the most powerful and hated class of people known from the 4th hidden village over. They're smart, and they are deadly when provoked. With this in mind, one can only imagine what devastation can take place should a half NEET be pushed to the point of getting serious, let alone a /jp/NEET. Imagine what can be done if one would simply put their minds to something and pursue it nonstop. Hakurei would be no different. She's part /jp/NEET by birth and is suspectable to the antagonist gene carried should anything happen to her waifu. T̶o̶o̶ ̶b̶a̶d̶ ̶s̶o̶m̶e̶t̶h̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶d̶i̶d̶ ̶b̶e̶c̶a̶u̶s̶e̶ ̶h̶e̶r̶ ̶e̶x̶i̶s̶t̶e̶n̶c̶e̶ ̶i̶s̶ ̶d̶e̶n̶i̶e̶d̶ ̶b̶y̶ ̶Y̶u̶k̶a̶r̶i̶,̶ ̶s̶t̶a̶t̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶s̶h̶e̶ ̶n̶e̶v̶e̶r̶ ̶e̶x̶i̶s̶t̶e̶d̶. Just think of the c̶a̶r̶n̶a̶g̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶t̶o̶o̶k̶ ̶p̶l̶a̶c̶e̶ possibilities! Hakurei-- Daughter of Hakurei Reimu and the unknowing Anonymous /jp/[NEET], the most dangerous of the Hakurei bloodline to have ever existed. Her fury, unmatched. Her forgiveness, zero. Her unwavering ambition. And this all came to fruition when her waifu was tragically killed by Y̶u̶k̶a̶r̶i̶ ̶Y̶a̶k̶u̶m̶o̶,̶ ̶f̶e̶e̶l̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶t̶h̶r̶e̶a̶t̶e̶n̶e̶d̶ ̶b̶y̶ ̶h̶e̶r̶ ̶e̶x̶i̶s̶t̶e̶n̶c̶e̶ ̶f̶o̶r̶ ̶m̶a̶n̶y̶ ̶n̶o̶w̶ ̶u̶n̶k̶n̶o̶w̶n̶ ̶r̶e̶a̶s̶o̶n̶s̶ a human, right before her very eyes. E̶v̶e̶n̶ ̶t̶h̶o̶u̶g̶h̶ ̶i̶t̶ ̶w̶a̶s̶ ̶s̶a̶i̶d̶ ̶s̶h̶e̶ ̶d̶i̶e̶d̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶n̶a̶t̶u̶r̶a̶l̶ ̶c̶a̶u̶s̶e̶,̶ ̶H̶a̶k̶u̶r̶e̶i̶ ̶k̶n̶e̶w̶ ̶b̶e̶t̶t̶e̶r̶. Following the events and the truth of her origin, she formed an alliance with Youkai stronger than ever seen before. Rivaling that of Hakurei Reimu's notoriety for being friendly with the so-called enemies. With Hakurei's newfound thirst for vengeance, she awakened something never seen before-- *the scroll is ripped here, no more entry*

[More Written Cancer No.]

*other end starts here, as marked by similar tears* Legend has it she had never found satisfaction h̶a̶v̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶l̶o̶s̶t̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶h̶e̶r̶ ̶a̶l̶l̶i̶e̶s̶ ̶s̶l̶a̶u̶g̶h̶t̶e̶r̶e̶d̶,̶ ̶a̶l̶l̶ ̶w̶h̶i̶l̶e̶ ̶b̶e̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶b̶r̶a̶n̶d̶e̶d̶ ̶a̶s̶ ̶a̶ ̶d̶e̶m̶o̶n̶ ̶o̶n̶ ̶p̶a̶r̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶a̶n̶ ̶o̶n̶i̶ and terrorized the world for as long as she lived a̶s̶ ̶s̶a̶i̶d̶ ̶f̶r̶o̶m̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶l̶y̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶w̶a̶y̶w̶o̶r̶d̶ ̶m̶o̶u̶t̶h̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶Y̶u̶k̶a̶r̶i̶ ̶Y̶a̶k̶u̶m̶o̶, reminding them of their sins against humanity- but that is all just a myth. Or so they say..! The Hakurei Bloodline still exists today and the descendants since Hakurei Reimu are increasingly similar in behavior. Cold exterior, mega hostility at random, a warm heart, a memory of their younger years, friendliness with Youkai and Fairies alike, and a deathly fury should anyone cross them..! Nobody knows what happened to that one abnormality in the bloodline but one thing is certain-- she did exist and the world is not the same as it had been a̶n̶d̶ ̶Y̶a̶k̶u̶m̶o̶ ̶c̶a̶n̶ ̶n̶e̶v̶e̶r̶ ̶c̶h̶a̶n̶g̶e̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶.
In all actuality, she should not exist! But it is not she who tells the tale...

Offspring Touhous tend to look like their parent Touhous, so nobody will know what allegedly happened when Reimu drug Anon off into the forest that spring night, but I doubt any answers can be drawn. Some say Fairies are dumb, but they, unlike others, remember Anon and his kindness as the first human friend to Fairy-kind, and second to befriend Youkai despite the health risks.
Some of those Fairies w̶e̶r̶e̶ eventually f̶o̶r̶c̶e̶ ̶e̶v̶o̶l̶v̶e̶d̶ ̶s̶o̶m̶e̶h̶o̶w̶ ̶i̶n̶t̶o̶ ̶w̶h̶a̶t̶ became another variant of Fairies, evolved Fairies-Akyuu, Seieki ni Muragari Suitsuku Yousei-tachi (6).
To make matters worse, Eirin pleads ignorance to any answers about Hakurei and relationship the between Reimu and Anonymous. With no trace of Anon's existence and the coverup of Hakurei's existence comes an abrupt end with more questions than answers w̶i̶t̶h̶ ̶K̶e̶i̶n̶e̶ ̶d̶e̶c̶e̶a̶s̶e̶d̶,̶ ̶A̶k̶y̶u̶u̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶h̶e̶r̶ ̶s̶c̶r̶o̶l̶l̶s̶ ̶g̶o̶n̶e̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶n̶o̶ ̶s̶i̶g̶n̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶e̶i̶t̶h̶e̶r̶ ̶e̶x̶i̶s̶t̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶o̶n̶ ̶t̶o̶p̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶i̶t̶ ̶a̶l̶l̶ ̶w̶i̶t̶h̶ ̶o̶n̶l̶y̶ ̶a̶ ̶f̶e̶w̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶i̶r̶ ̶w̶r̶i̶t̶i̶n̶g̶s̶ ̶r̶e̶m̶a̶i̶n̶i̶n̶g̶,̶ ̶u̶n̶d̶e̶r̶ ̶a̶ ̶n̶a̶m̶e̶l̶e̶s̶s̶ ̶a̶u̶t̶h̶o̶r̶. /jp/sies were always scapegoats so this is nothing new. However, there is no excuse for erasing his mark on Gensokyo from existence. It is no different from destroying History! Anon might have been wronged, but maybe this is his revenge..! Have mercy upon the denizens of Gensokyou for they know not the Pandora's Box of Insanity they l̶i̶v̶e̶ ̶i̶n̶ have just opened and there is no way to close it! Hakurei was just a̶n̶ ̶e̶x̶a̶m̶p̶l̶e̶ the beginning!

-The Unwritten History of Humans and Youkai: Extended Edition 7 [Gen. Rebel Alliance]
-Entry: Hakurei —
-Author: Anonymous-Unofficial Timeline 4

[Anonymous No.]

>>21983869
Sounds accurate enough to be real but some areas could be popular for running away or suicide

[Anonymous No.]

Sakuya is an otokonoko

[Anonymous No.]

>>21983715
the more I think about it, the more sense it makes. Not sure how should I feel now.

[Anonymous No.]

The Tengu faked touhou 10 stage 4 was a falseflag there weren't even 6 million tengu living in gensokyo at the time so there's not way 6 million tengu were killed by the moriya shrine and they wouldn't be able to carry out an extermination that large in just 6 stages. Another thing is the hell invasion. Why did hell invade when they did? it's because tengu are in league with the princes of hell and want to bring about the destruction of gensokyo. why do you think ONLY women can use danmaku? it's because they want to sissify the men so when a REAL that comes we will be powerless as our men are killed, women raped, and what few survivors remain will either work as slaves for the tengu or work in brothels. OPEN. YOUR EYES. IT IS NOT. TOO. LATE. we are heading down a dangerous road but tragedy can be averted if you just OPEN. YOUR. EYES.

[Anonymous No.]

Touhou is designed to get secular modern people interested in faith to invite conversion for the betterment of their lives and society as a whole. ZUN has done so to help you find truth and look forward to your inevitable escape from the soul-eroding reality of this sinful material world. First you play the game and love the cute girls, and then you want to know the context of their chatter... Before you know it you are reading sutras and Dao De Jing and associated texts and have found yourself converted to some syncretic blend of Asian faiths similar to folk religion as practiced in China and the Chinese-influenced lands like Korea and Japan.
>inb4 the theory is stupid because if it is proselytism to the modernized secular peoples then why would Zun start with the PC98 games and EOSD, which have significantly less prominent religious themes than later Windows games like Perfect Cherry Blossom, Mountain of Faith, Ten Desires, etc.
That's what ZUN wants you to think... Would you be surprised if soon there will be a release of a game with themes drawn from the New Testament and the Jingjiao Documents (AKA the "Jesus Sutras" of Tang Dynasty faithful that blended Nestorian Christianity with Daoism and Mahayana)? Please understand the truth and have faith.

[Anonymous No.]

>>21985218
The Tengu put chemicals in the water to turn the freaking frogs gay.

[Anonymous No.]

yukari is the hakurei shrine god

[Anonymous No.]

>>21983790

[Anonymous No.]

>>21983715
Piggybacking off this, Gensokyo is real, but it's not the only one of its kind. Other countries have their own "Land of Illusion", though obviously not called that.
Dragon God oversees all of them; the peace treaty was basically him recognizing Gensokyo as a youkai reserve.
Each land can interact on a small scale (like Yukari bringing in hobgoblins) but anything major like going to war with each other is explicitly forbidden. This is the "great peril" mentioned that will bring down the Dragon God's wrath.

[Anonymous No.]

>>21985688
...is there an American Gensokyo populated with fearsome critters from lumberjack lore like jackalopes and fur-bearing trout?

[Anonymous No.]

>>21985688
Imagine ending up in the Norse God's version of gensokyo and getting tricked into fucking a horse or something

[Anonymous No.]

There's at least one person posting from Gensokyo.

[Anonymous No.]

Reimu doesn't really die. When she dies her soul is recycled into a new body, retaining all memory like Akyuu. She's too important to Gensokyo to be replaced.
As for her mortal friend Marisa, it depends because she is not important to Gensokyo.

[Anonymous No.]

>>21986184
Worse still, unlike Akyuu which is stated to born and die naturally, the Hakurei's soul will forcefully be implanted and replace the soul of their next shrine maiden. When Aya said "they need to find a new shrine maiden", she really means finding a new vessel to house the Hakurei miko's power.

[Anonymous No.]

>>21985319
is this a new salvationist religion

[Anonymous No.]

>>21985688
but the Hobgoblins came from the outside world, not from a European-Gensokyo

[Anonymous No.]

>>21986255
The only one who knows for certain is Yukari, and I doubt she would run her mouth and goes "oh I got this from the European equivalent of this place".

[Anonymous No.]

>>21986444
but RDM came from Europe- why would they not go to Euro-gensokyo?

[Anonymous No.]

>>21987822
>RDM
Red Devil Mansion?
Anyway, who knows. It was mentioned a couple of times that the mansion is so vividly striking and yet seems to belong where it is, so maybe it's fate at hand.
Or maybe Remi is a closet weeb given her choice for two of her most well-known servant, and figured Gensokyo is a lot better than whatever it is the European cryptids call theirs.
Of course I could always admit there's no other Gensokyo, but what kinda conspiracy theorist will ever admit he's wrong.

[Anonymous No.]

>>21983715
Like everyseries.
Popstar is real and Sakurai made this as a note for what he discovered.

[Anonymous No.]

>>21987822
>>21987977
Maybe Remilia wanted to stand out as a vampire in a eastern land. A matter of pride or something.
Besides, SDM isn't the only western influence in Gensokyo.

[Anonymous No.]

>>21989569
The SDM could very well have come from the fantasies of Japanese of what Europe is. (indeed, it is, but that's beside the point)

[Anonymous No.]

>>21985579
Where is this from, I vaguely remember seeing it before.

[Anonymous No.]

>>21993573
From this commercial
https://youtu.be/FzCUhF5SHw4

[Anonymous No.]

>>21994034
That was a wild 32 seconds. Thanks.

[Anonymous No.]

>>21983790
Dude, I have professional tism and even if know you have too much tism. I highly bequest for your own mental health you tone down your shitstorm.

[Anonymous No.]

>>21983790
damn son you're fucking retarded

[Anonymous No.]

My theories include

There being a European/western equivalent to Gensokyo, probably called something like Avalon though it would have a bunch of names.

The moon itself is the edge/focal point of the barrier separating Gensokyo from the outside world, imagine it kind of like a mirror, with the moon being the glass. (this explains why the lunarians can interact with the outside world and gensokyo, because they're in the intermediate zone that both overlap in but keeps them separate).

The player is the Hakurei god.

Finally, and probably the easiest to argue about, the rule is specifically about people *inside* the human village becoming youkai, because they are under the protection of the Hakurei Shrine, if you left the village (like Marisa did) the Crimson Slasher probably wouldn't bother you if you wanted to become a youkai. Plus becoming a youkai is actually easy if you can get people to fear you, like Ichirin did accidentally.

[Anonymous No.]

>>21983790
my god

[Anonymous No.]

The Satori race had, at one point, managed to infiltrate human society and then achieve things that had far greater implications than the nation of Japan. For their role in a massive conspiracy that managed to control the world's governments, they were ostracized and hunted down once found out. The only remainder of their mark in society is the artistic motif of the Third Eye that they introduced in secret to many different places.

[Anonymous No.]

Yuuka is Reimu's mother

[Anonymous No.]

>this thread
Why would there be conspiracy theories about a completely subjective and individualized place where 95% of the everything is headcanons? Why pretend it's an objective thing?

[Anonymous No.]

Celestials are secretly taking over the world.
In Touhou Highly responsive to prayers on Makai route there's a character called Sariel, in wiki she's the angel of death, why she was in Makai? Just to kill Shiki and the demon race.
They begin rapture, world goes to shit, panic all over, "repend or die", shit disaster.
The apocalypse of divine judgement, why she does this you say? Because the demons stops them of course!
Hakurei saved the world from their holy wings!

[Anonymous No.]

>>22008431
>>21983994

[Anonymous No.]

>>21998018
>The player is the Hakurei god
Are you telling me that all of us are dragon gods?
If this lines up with the OP theory, what decides the influence of each player on Gensokyo? Our 1CCs?

[Anonymous No.]

>>22009686
>Are you telling me that all of us are dragon gods?

Well we do all have influence over gensokyo through our understanding and ideas of it, to the point that if we want we can believe anything about it and it effectively be true.

and I wouldn't really go that far that it's our active participation shaping it, just what we think about it.

[Anonymous No.]

>>22009686
When was it ever implied the Dragon God is the Hakurei's god? If anything, the fact it disappears after the peace treaty implies it isn't in Gensokyo atm.

[Anonymous No.]

>>22007221
this is real.

[Anonymous No.]

>>21984457
You should feel ashamed by posting non /jp/ pictures and exactly like a fucking newfag that needs to lurk the fuck more before posting

[Anonymous No.]

>>22010040
Something about sealing and the boarder as negotiation
I don’t remember it all or if it’s even true

[Anonymous No.]

>>21985688
When's that momhu wendigo coming, zun?

[Anonymous No.]

>>21985688
That's what I like to think too. That there's a whole bunch of other "Gensokyos" scattered around the world.

[Anonymous No.]

Rinnosuke is actually ZUN's self-insert. And I'm saying that in a positive way.
- He use the name Kourindou for his blog.
- Kourindou in Gensokyo sits between the Forest of Magic and Human Village, because Rinnosuke deals with both youkai and humans. ZUN deals with creating Gensokyo (youkai) for us (humans), so he "sits" between them.
- Rinnosuke is frequently bothered by the girls, but he prefer staying out of their problems. ZUN writes about the girls getting into incident, and they have to resolve it themselves.
- Rinnosuke wishes to make historical records of Gensokyo. Touhou Project is ZUN's life work.
- And both wear glasses.

[Anonymous No.]

>>22018310
Rinnosuke is ZUN's isekai-reincarnation.