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/jp/ - Otaku Culture


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File: 420 KB, 800x800, Three.Mischievous.Fairies.full.1382357.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20724647 No.20724647 [Reply] [Original]

How do I keep fairies out of my house?

>> No.20724716

Ship them off to Alice's fairy rape dungeon.

>> No.20724740

Castration

No semen - no fairies

>> No.20725337

catch and ship them to your local onahole reseller

>> No.20725367

>>20724647
Buy a house first, they don't bother with dyke psychopaths anyway and are reliable consults if you pay them.

>> No.20725470

>>20724647
Why would you? I would keep them and play with them every day (not in a sexual way).

>> No.20725513

>>20725470
They will probably break or steal your shit. I want them in my house only for as long it takes for me to flood their tight insides with my hot semen, after that I kick them out and throw them in some bushes while they respawn.

The only fairy that gets a special treatment is my daughterwife Luna-chan. She can stay as long as she cooks, cleans and surrender her beautiful tiny body.

>> No.20725528

>>20724647
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F6kd1Kd03GM

>> No.20725558

>>20724647
Tell me where you live and I'll come to your home and rape them until they leave.

>> No.20725579

>>20724647
Just like make them stones lmao

>> No.20726273

Condense your fairy threads, kudasai.

>> No.20728069

>>20724647
Sleep naked and if possible with a boner.
Fairies dislikes the smell and the shape of an erect dick, so they will never come close to you during your sleep.

>> No.20728125

>>20728069
Stop trying to rape anons in their sleep, Star.

>> No.20728880

>>20724647
Feed them, everyday. Until they get fat and become lazy.

>> No.20728886

>>20724647
Call Keine to have their students get CAVED. Or call Mama Junko to get them spanked.

>> No.20728900
File: 172 KB, 400x448, 1541216120424.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20728900

>>20728880
They're already fat

>> No.20728974

>>20728900
ripe for the violent mating press.
Ahh, I want to slam a cute small fairy with my whole 95kg bodyweight!

>> No.20729070

>>20728900
Luna-chan is an exception because she's pregnant with my child.

>> No.20729109

play fetch with the faries, but only pretend to throw. They will seek the ball to the ends of the earth, while you have playfully だましたd them.

>> No.20729495

>>20729070
Sad news for you, Luna is fucking dead

>> No.20729517 [SPOILER] 
File: 20 KB, 829x242, 1548699194169.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20729517

>>20729495
No, she's just renounced her status as a prospective nature deity because you're a lazy vulgar child without the sense you should have, don't ask me why, you never do. Mab Darogan would be ashamed, don't you feel that? Oh, I'm sorry, you're not comfortable with feelings, only whining like a rage enslaved shit heel with a self centered persecution complex. Grow.
Up,

>> No.20729612

>>20729495
Is she dead or temporarily creampied?
I saw something about her becoming a crystal or something, I bet its reversible. Fairies don't die.

>> No.20730437
File: 1.79 MB, 2355x1325, 1538914915674.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20730437

>>20728886
>Or call Mama Junko to get them spanked.
I'll put on a dress and act like a fairy if it meant getting spanked by mama Junko.

>> No.20730697

>>20730437
>act like a fairy
So you're going to suck anons off while they sleep?

>> No.20731619

>>20724647
>Locks work people. Keep a lock on your bedroom door. When you're playing video games. It's even better when the power switch is in your room so you can play as long as you want.
>Be sure to change the door and locks too so it can't be axed to death.
>Remember, fairies are generally weak. Make your doors and windows hard to open.
>The harder it is for fairies to get in, the better. That wa, they're less likely to walk in, take your shit, leave or fuck everything up and run off into the bushes to stalk you.
>I sometimes let Fairies in to play multiplayer if they're watching through the windows, I just tell them to leave when finished. They're really polite. More polite than you think, but they can be real assholes to boot. Luckily enough the fairies I meet are well behaved and become kickass players after a short while.
>If you can fly, Danmaku is a good game choice. But the fairy might.. Let's not think about that.
>Take it easy /jp/. *see you space cowboy pose*
Source: >>/jp/thread/S20037235#p20040655

The source is credible.
One more suggestion- contact Kogasa and give her the blueprints for Steel and have her make a 100lbs/50kg door by weight and have the windows similarly made with such a weight that fairies would have difficulty not just breaking glass and entering.

>> No.20731628

>>20726273
/jp/ is the Touhou Fairy worship board. /jp/ is permitted to have as many fairy threads as they please.

>> No.20731642

>>20731619
I thought you were supposed to hang iron above the door to keep faefolk at bay.

>> No.20731667

>>20731642
I don't know about that method so I cannot give my two cents on that matter.
How do you hang iron on top if the iron swings just as easily as the door?

>> No.20731683

>>20731667
You could nail a horseshoe into the wall above the doorway.

>> No.20731733

Fun fact: >>/jp/thread/S20037235#p20041794 is taken as law despite being inherently wrong on account to multiple posts before after inside and out of the thread in question.
The faggot that makes a certain post is so assmad that he literally cannot do anything else but cling to the very same post whenever the slut gets trashed-rightfully.
I would rather talk about Fairies but this came to attention. Anyway, this is a thread about keeping fairies out. Akyuu would be proud to implement this universally. But fairies will develop muscles and become even more or less alluring that they were to begin with.
I can protect my balls but it doesn't mean the fairies won't trap me and carry me off into the forest for their own selfish deeds (nudge nudge, wink wink) IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN /jp/!
LET THE GAMES BEGIN! DIBS ON LUNATIC!

>> No.20732968
File: 342 KB, 449x554, 1547906801423.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20732968

How can fairies keep /jp/ out of their house?

>> No.20735556

>>20732968
They literally can't.

>> No.20736007

>>20732968
by living in a tree that only fairies are able to get into

>> No.20738386

>>20732968
burn down a forest?
permanent solution for a temporary problem but effective
>>20736007
they still need space for living. Only the small hand sized fairies can pull that off.

>> No.20738591

>>20738386
Fairy tree houses are small and they shrink when they enter

>> No.20739474
File: 380 KB, 1280x1807, 4.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20739474

>>20732968
By using /jp/ as their house

>> No.20739501

>>20739474
i want a fairy to live inside my smelly NEET underwear

>> No.20739601
File: 101 KB, 500x640, 63cd42cf01b158829ac3047b99b49b1e.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20739601

>>20739501

>> No.20739629
File: 103 KB, 500x640, d7a3e028dd565e7607af67c9639d6239.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20739629

>>20739501

>> No.20741215

>>20724647
Just fuck them.

>> No.20741220

>>20724647
mosquito nets

>> No.20744587

>>20741215
They'll stay even longer then.

>> No.20744612
File: 723 KB, 1280x1829, scan006.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20744612

It is practically impossible.
Even if you barricade yourself in, they will still find way in to steal your semen.

>> No.20744700

>>20739601
>>20739629
How do you come up with this stuff?

>> No.20747769

>>20744612
This.
They'll probably hide in plain sight if they capture the Red White and Blue Fairies. You could walk into your room and not notice at least 400 fairies slowly creeping in if not staring right at you as you walk through your house.

>> No.20747932

>>20747769
Now I'm imagining entering my room and seeing a fairy just standing in the corner while giving me lustful looks and acting as if I can't see her.

>> No.20748099

>>20747932
This is what Akyuu wanted..! GOOD JOB ANON! YOU DID IT! YOU CONQUERED THE FAIRY MENACE! I'LL NOTIFY MY WIFE AKYUU RIGHT AWAY!

OH SHIT. YOU DIDN'T HEAR THAT LAST PART!

>> No.20749928

>>20741215
Nice try Saph

>> No.20749946

>>20744700
First step: being a male Japanese artist.

>> No.20749972
File: 124 KB, 1200x678, this should work.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20749972

>>20724647

>> No.20750478

>>20747769
I thought Sunny's light refraction wasn't perfect and people could still see her if they get too close.

>> No.20750694

>>20750478
Correct.

>> No.20753957

>>20750478
You underestimate how determined fairies with rampaging lust can be

>> No.20756950

>>20739601
>>20739629
Now this is way too literal.
Not like I'm complaining.

>> No.20759517

>>20739629
You know what, I didn't recognize it at first.

>> No.20762691

>>20739629
Imagine a fairy smelling like your underwear.

>> No.20762732

>>20744612
i like this artist, he makes good doujins, great drawn bodies

his faces is very generic though, its almost as if he just draws the same standard face on every female character just with a different haircut

a bit of variety doesn't hurt

>> No.20762744

>>20762691
So, like sweat and precum?

>> No.20762775

>>20762744
i only change underwear once every two week or something, so more like a fermented combination of semen, urine and sweat

i have to spray them with deodorant before i throw them into the hamper so mommy can bear to wash them

>> No.20765405

>>20762732
Some never change. some do.

>> No.20768648

>>20724647
Why would you keep fairies out of your house?

>> No.20768695

>>20768648
They steal and play tricks on you

>> No.20772066

>>20768695
Steal what?
Grow up dude. Fairies are harmless. Just show them how to play games other than danmaku and they're just another visitor that comes by often.

>> No.20772141

>>20772066
>steal what?
your virginity

>> No.20772144

>>20772066
Fairies stole my heart

>> No.20772155

>>20772066
Fairies stole my fairy hentai doujins.

>> No.20772173

>>20772066
>Fairies are harmless.
How many times has Clownpiece tried to burn down the shrine she was living at, again?

>> No.20772177

>>20772141
It's not stealing if I'm giving it away.

>> No.20773483

>>20772141
I'm okay with this.
No wizardry for me.

>> No.20777574

>>20728900
>They're already fat
How.

>> No.20777596

>>20728900
Imagine that sitting on your face

>> No.20777814

>>20777596
My peepee hurts now.

>> No.20778182

>>20777814
stop jacking off anon.

>> No.20778485
File: 140 KB, 727x1200, 1535015706840.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20778485

AAAH I WANT A FAIRY WIFE!!!

>> No.20778638

>>20778485
good luck

>> No.20780011
File: 998 KB, 1000x900, 1524415232323.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20780011

>>20778485
You shouldn't marry masturbation toys. It will only lead to heartbreak.

>> No.20780028

>>20778485
You can't marry my onaholedaughter.

>> No.20780238

>>20780011
Maybe he's a masochist.

>> No.20781620

>Everyone's here want to fuck the fairies
Is it wrong if I just want to pet their head and squeeze/pinch their cheeks?

>> No.20781668

>>20781620
Only if you are a woman.
If you are a man and don't find fairies sexy, you need to go see a doctor.

>> No.20782141

>>20781620
I just want them to pet my dickhead while I squeeze/pinch their buttcheeks, if you know what I mean.

>> No.20782164

>>20781668
>Only
*Not

>> No.20784477
File: 122 KB, 666x556, 1521096213409.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20784477

>>20781620

>> No.20786224

>>20784477
What if the fairies were boys?

>> No.20786372

Just do what reimu did with clownpiece

Bury them under your house

>> No.20787121

>>20786224
As an aspiring boy fairy I'd say fuck you, I'll use magic to make your balls disappear. Only girls get to pet and pinch this.

>> No.20788119

>>20786224
Fairies are, by definition, sexy and cute, so there's no way they could be boys.
Also, shotas are garbage and you should be hanged by the balls for even suggesting such heresy.

>> No.20790736
File: 426 KB, 705x1000, 1549246482889.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20790736

I want to breed Luna-chan!

>> No.20792085

>>20724647
>Not wanting cute fairies roaming around your house
OP is confirmed faggore

>> No.20796965

>>20724647
Why do you want to keep them out?
They're nice people! Yes! Even Fairies are people! They're just smol, cute and a 100% female group of people who happen to be literal embodiments of nature! Please overlook their mischievous nature /jp/!

>> No.20802073

>>20790736
She's just a little girl, dude.

>> No.20802104

>>20802073
With a mature woman's ass?
She deserves balls deep creampies, there's no denying it

>> No.20802113

>>20802104
That's just the faggot artist.
Fairies have small, cute and tight butts.

>> No.20802118

>>20802073
Exactly! ripe for the picking

god i want to fill that tiny cunny with my vile and disgusting virgin NEET SEMEN


oooooooooooooooooo

>> No.20802131

>>20802118
I'm next in line! Squishy sloppy seconds with Luna-chan's violated fairy pussy as she takes cock #2 of 20

>> No.20802250

>>20802131
>sloppy seconds
I'd rather rape Luna-chan by myself. I have enough semen to fill her cunny until it's overflowing, so there's no need for more.

>> No.20802270

>>20802250
No, Mom said it's my turn to rape the fairies.

>> No.20802295

>>20802270
i doubt you have enough good boy points to just skip in line like that

back in line soldier, you gotta wait your turn to rape little defenseless girls

>> No.20802395

>>20802295
While you were typing that I already had a quickie with Luna's mouth pussy

>> No.20802417
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20802417

Star might be the cutest fairy of light

>> No.20802431

>>20802395
That's it, I'm telling on you.

>> No.20802445
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20802445

>> No.20802449
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20802449

>> No.20802453

>>20802417
Change "might be" to "definetly is" and I will agree with you.

>> No.20802455
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20802455

>> No.20802481
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20802481

>>20802417
>>20802445
>>20802449
>>20802455
God dammit, she's asking for it.

>> No.20802576

>>20724647
>out
You're not living your life correctly.

>> No.20802626

Star is too lewd for her own good, one day she will end up getting raped by a horrible ugly and deformed unwashed virgin neet loser thats going to spew his disgusting semen into her womb

>> No.20803886

>>20802626
Why do you think this exact thing hasn't already happened?

>> No.20805793

>>20802626
We need to hold a seminar for fairies on how not to get impregnated by the deformed. Imagine if all our grandchildren have to rape are deformed fairies?

>> No.20805835

You can't rape a fairy since they are always willing. Looks like humanity got outplayed again by the fair folk.

>> No.20805855
File: 720 KB, 1275x613, __luna_child_star_sapphire_and_sunny_milk_touhou_drawn_by_yukizen__bae8b166035b0c75ccf839acce753da4.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20805855

>>20805793
Fairy gene is too strong, no matter who rapes them, they'll always give birth to cute and perfect little girls.
That makes them the perfect partner for the average /jp/sie, since if you fuck a hag there's a fairly high chance that the kid will be an ugly fat useless depressed nerd with zero social skills, but if you fuck a fairy your child will always be a cute and lovely little angel full of life and energy.
Impregnating fairies is good and every man should do it.

>> No.20808322

>>20802417
perfect for yandere

>> No.20810307

>>20802576
Hello Touma.

>> No.20815424 [DELETED] 

What are you doing /jp/.

>> No.20818105

>>20805855
I'll just disregard the rest of your post.
Since when did Fairies have genes?

>> No.20818344

>>20818105
Since when they don't?
Fairies have bodies identical to humans, apart from the wings. They seem to have the same sense of smell and taste, they eat human food, sleep like humans and they have navels, so it's safe to assume that, for the most part, their bodies function exactly like a human's.
They also wear underwear, so they most likely have cunnies.

>> No.20818358

>>20818344
A lot of these things they only do because humans do it
It's canon that fairies don't actually need to eat but do it because they see humans doing it

>> No.20818361

>>20818344
>they eat human food
Remember when Reimu mocked them for bringing her a box of pickled flower blossoms?

>> No.20818381

>>20818358
>do it because they see humans doing it
I'm going to show them h-manga of lolis being raped, mindbroken and impregnated by a fat hairy man so they want to do it with me.

>> No.20818382 [SPOILER] 
File: 260 KB, 360x832, 1549993332750.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20818382

>>20818344
>They also wear underwear
They wear bloomers as part of their outdoor clothes rather than underwear. They don't wear them when they're sleeping or in this case

>> No.20818423

>>20818382
Nopan is part of a maid's uniform, specially in the SDM.

>> No.20818448

>>20818381
Fairies would prank you by the time you open your nerd book.

>> No.20820303

>>20818381
Even Fairies have morals, Anon.

>> No.20822143

Pick up the pace /jaypiss/

>> No.20822152

>>20822143
Fearbelongs on /lag/ nerd.

>> No.20824370

>>20818344
>they eat human food
Humans don't eat sperm, normally.

>> No.20826593

>>20824370
female humans do

>> No.20827740

>>20826593
*sluts or those of that nature in the slightest.
*3DPD only

>> No.20827793

You got a double barrel shotgun with you? Good, then it will be your universal communicator with the locals of the realm.

>> No.20832599

electric lamp
works everytime

>> No.20834542

>>20827793
More like fairies will rob you at double barrel shotgun-point

>> No.20836614

>>20778485
Why is /jp/ sfw when everyone just posts lewd images anyway?

>> No.20838264

>>20724647
Give them Valentines Day chocolate. They'll probably respect your wishes after that.

>> No.20838666
File: 95 KB, 550x700, 1505717014780.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20838666

>>20836614
People should post less lewd images.

>> No.20838693
File: 402 KB, 689x756, 55641302_p0.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20838693

>>20838666
I disagree.
In fact, I think people aren't post enough lewds.

>> No.20838754

>>20838666
That is my favorite Fairy from the games but I have to disagree with you, satanposter.

>> No.20838774

>>20838666
what a weird and dumb opinion

imagine going into a thread about winged little girls that looks like pre-schoolers and not be expeecting super lewd pictures

fairies are for mating press rape and they should be lewded everyday, infact they thrive on it

>> No.20839128

>>20838666
Shut up, Satan. Sunflower fairies especially need more lewds.

>> No.20839955
File: 345 KB, 827x1200, 1510952420040.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20839955

>>20838774
>winged little girls that looks like pre-schoolers
Just because they are the height of preschoolers does not mean they look like preschoolers.

>> No.20840001

>>20839955
There's a reason that guy was never brought back.

>> No.20840820

>>20838264
If you give a fairy cookie, she'll want a cup of cock milk.

>> No.20845572

>>20725513
Do any of the fairies even know how to cook?

>> No.20845911

>>20845572
read the manga

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