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/jp/ - Otaku Culture


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1616937 No.1616937 [Reply] [Original]

So my imouto finally came home and brought a friend over, but she is fat. I'm thinking of talking to them, yet I can't find the words to say. What should I do /jp/? Also, they're 12.

>> No.1616943

>fat
Why bother, unless you're fat too. Or you want to score with your cute imouto.

>> No.1616957

Just lock yourself in your room and secretly fap to her.

But seriously, you two have nothing in common and she's not interested in talking with you, so don't even bother trying.

>> No.1616959

>>1616943
I'll do anything to be around my imouto, what should I talk about?

>> No.1616961
File: 52 KB, 640x480, 1226808629895.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1616961

Aim for the head

>> No.1616967

Talk about puberty and how body weight destroys it

>> No.1616968

Continuation of the other imouto thread? JANITORS = FAGS.

>> No.1616993

People like talking about themselves. Get off on a good foot with your sister's friend by introducing the conversation with something you already know about her, like her weight:

"So... I see you're fat. How's that working for you?"

>> No.1617003

Don't let them see your weeaboo stuff on the computer. Learn from the other OP

>> No.1617013

Walk out there and say "I bet you can't fit my whole penis in your mouth!".

>> No.1617029

Ask her if she wants some bacon sandwiches.

>> No.1617035

>>1617003
Whatever happened to that guy?

>> No.1617038

>>1617035
Deleted

>> No.1617039

Hey, what are you two up to?

Wanna play Risk?

>> No.1617057

>>1617029

All Jack wanted was some bacon.

>> No.1617066

>>1617035
He made a post a day or two later talking about how he was working with his sister on a school project and said that she was in his lap, he was kissing her neck got a boner, and she grabbed it. She asked if it was because he was thinking about sex and he said no, it was because he loved her.

If I remember correctly.

>> No.1617082

Imouto = Attractive?

>> No.1617093

>>1617066
I seem to remember him saying that His sister actually thought about the whole "bet you cant fit my penis in your mouth" thing, I forget the details, but he did say that she did indeed put it in her mouth.

>> No.1617101

I would not risk engaging while the whale is in play, unless you have a tub of Häagen-Dazs you can throw down the stairs to save yourself.

>> No.1617110

>>1617066
>>1617093
Someone needs to find these stories and repost them in some kind of dedication thread.

>> No.1617115

>>1617093
>His

This makes me think of Jesus raping lolis. And that makes me hard.

>> No.1617130

>>1617115
I intended for that to happen... seriously.

>> No.1617142

>>1617093
>>1617066

I don't believe you.

>> No.1617144

COME ON, YOU GUYS HAD ME EXCITED

>> No.1617151

>>1617142
Well obviously you do, since you weren't there, retard.

>> No.1617198

So, what do you guys think about women?

>> No.1617209

>>1617198
My mother is one, and my sisters are too.
I have great repsect for them, therefore, I greatly respect women.

>> No.1617210

>>1617198
Well... I guess they have vaginas and stuff....

>> No.1617211

>>1617198
Kitchen, etc.

>> No.1617222

>>1617209
>respect
Typing in the dark = bad idea

>> No.1617229

>>1617198

I don't believe in them.

>> No.1617238

>>1617198

I believe they made great contributions to society.

>> No.1617267

Do you guys, like genuinely now, do you believe or not believe women can be ronery? I use ronery rather than lonely to imply the 4chan context of the word.

No trolling implied from this, I'm interested genuinely.

>> No.1617275

>>1617238

Why do you lie?

>>1617267

Why do you exist?

>> No.1617293

>>1617066
>>1617093
Are you guys talking about the original "bet you can't fit my penis in your mouth anon?" No, I never stuck it in her mouth. But what >>1617066 said is correct.

>> No.1617290

>>1617267
We've been over this.

no

>> No.1617305

>>1617293
Anything happen since then?

>> No.1617312

>>1617293
So what did she see on your computer?

>> No.1617331

>>1617305
Stuff. But nothing specific or interesting.

>>1617312
She asked to see my porn. I don't think this needs further explanation.

>> No.1617336

>My life is so much better now, /jp/. I was helping my loli imouto with some project she had to do, and she was sitting in my lap like usual. I can't look at her now without getting a boner, and with her sitting in my lap, the effect was doubled.

>She shifted her weight around and noticed it, reached back, and in perfect eroge style, grabbed it and asked "Are you thinking about sex?"

>I said "No, just the beautiful girl I have sitting in my lap" and kissed her on the neck, and nibbled a bit.

>She jumped, and exclaimed "That tickles!"
"Probably not as much as... this!" I launch into tickling her in every spot I know how. It turned into the usual wrestling sort of thing, with me eventually on my back, and ler laying on top of me, stomach to stomach.

>We got interrupted because she had a phone call from some friend or some shit, and when she came back she said she was going over to her friend's house, and thanked me for helping and playing with her.

>> No.1617354

>>1617331
So I'm assuming you let her see your porn them.

>> No.1617363

>My life is so much better now, /jp/. I was helping my loli imouto with some project she had to do, and she was sitting in my lap like usual. I can't look at her now without getting a boner, and with her sitting in my lap, the effect was doubled.

>She shifted her weight around and noticed it, reached back, and in perfect eroge style, grabbed it and asked "Are you thinking about sex?"

>I said "No, just the beautiful girl I have sitting in my lap" and kissed her on the neck, and nibbled a bit.

>She jumped, and exclaimed "That tickles!"
"Probably not as much as... this!" I launch my penis into her anus, thrusting it around every which way. It turned into the usual anal sort of thing, with me eventually on my back, and her laying on top of me, back to stomach.

>We got interrupted because she had a phone call from some friend and my dick was full of shit, and when I came she said she was going over to her friend's house, and thanked me for helping and "playing" with her.

>> No.1617379

>>1617336
It's so ...beautiful.

>> No.1617396

>>1617354
Yes. She didn't look at me the same for a couple days, but she got over it. Those couple days hurt. Look, before I get banned by some rogue fag mod, let's keep it at this. I've been banned for being a pedophile before, and I don't really feel like being banned for it again.

>> No.1617444

>>1617396
What did you show her?

2d, 3d? Healthy or loli?

>> No.1617457

>>1617444
I'm a /just pedo/ anon, what the fuck do you think I showed her? 2D, lolicon. It's the only stuff I have.

>> No.1617476

>>1616937
Listen in on their conversation for a while and then if they don't say anything when you come in the room, ask your sister something slightly related to what they were talking about and see where it goes from there.

>> No.1617482

>>1617396
Dude, you deserved those couple days, never show a girl your porn, it just never works, ever.

>> No.1617517

>>1617482
I deserved those couple days for showing a 9-year-old hardcore lolicon hentai. I'm not trying to shirk responsibilities here, but it was harsh. I thought she'd never talk to me again.

>> No.1617525
File: 69 KB, 704x400, 1226813723258.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1617525

>>1617482
You could grab a videocam and make your own.

>> No.1617531

>>1617457
>I'm a /just pedo/ anon
>what the fuck do you think I showed her? 2D, lolicon.
>2dD, lolicon
>I'm a /just pedo/ anon
NOT PEDO ENOUGH

>> No.1617545

>>1617531
Not willing to download something obviously traceable when I have the real thing right in front of me. I mean really, she doesn't care if I stare at her when she's naked, and I get to feel her up every once in awhile too (as long as it's not too often, she tells me).

>> No.1617560

>>1617545
Would she mind if you just kind of pulled up a chair and fapped, in the bathroom while she's taking a shower?

Can I go to your house sometime Anon? ;_;

>> No.1617571

>>1617560
Dunno, never tried. I mean, she didn't seem to care when I came all over her hands.

And no, fuck you.

>> No.1617576

>>1617545
If she isn't begging for your penis yet, your obviously doing something wrong.

>> No.1617585

>>1617576
She's 9. She already knows sex hurts when you're young. Sure, I may have been the one to tell her that, but still, I'm not going to stick it in my sister. I'm perfectly fine with life the way it is; I don't need to end up in jail just yet.

>> No.1617592

>>1617571

Did she lick it off her fingers?

>> No.1617606

>>1617592
Thread number 1375000, go read.

>> No.1617618

>>1617606

Oh, I remember that. Hell, I was 1375010

>> No.1617625

>>1617585
You've already crossed the line, but whatever.

>> No.1617631

>>1617625
I haven't done anything she hasn't asked for. Except for the kissing... but siblings kiss all the time, that's normal.

>> No.1617633

>>1617585
Mouth. Fewer things to worry about

>> No.1617639

>>1617633
She already expressed a lack of interest for a blowjob. I haven't determined her feelings about the oral sex the other way around, but as I said, I'm okay with keeping things as they are now.

>> No.1617640

>>1617631
I'm not saying there's anything wrong you've done. It's just that you said you were afraid of jail, yet you've already done things that could land you a cell.

>> No.1617647

>>1617606
Crap, I forgot the link to the /jp/ archive.
Saging my own ignorance.

>> No.1617650

>>1617640
What I meant was if I start trying to do more things there's more of a chance of word getting out. If I only do what she wants, then I don't see her going off and telling people that I did stuff TO her. If she thinks she's the one in charge, fewer people will know. I say fewer because some of her friends probably already know, but since I'm not in jail yet, things are alright.

>> No.1617667

>>1617650
>because some of her friends probably already know
Post your name if you hear sirens in front of your house, I'll send you letters in prison bro.

>> No.1617674

>>1617667
And also go take care of his imouto?

>> No.1617690

>>1617674

He wants a penpal, not a cellmate.

>> No.1617697

>>1617690
There's enough of us that he can have both.

>> No.1617705

>>1617690
Oh come on, he's enjoying life. Maybe you should too.

>> No.1617723

>>1617705

But I don't have a sister.

>> No.1617771

>>1617606
link?

>> No.1617869

>>1617771
Seconded

>> No.1617909

>>1617771

>> No.1617958

>>1617771
>>1617869
>>1617909
Are you newfags or something? I gave you a thread number, just plug it in on the front page of the archive. Now go.

>> No.1617997

>>1617958
What archive? 4chanarchive? Is there a specific /jp/ archive?

>> No.1618016

>>1617958
>This thread does not exist.

Care to provide a link that shows otherwise?

>> No.1618025

>>1617997
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

>> No.1618032
File: 77 KB, 579x1552, 1226819881592.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1618032

>>1617997
JESUS FUCKING SHIT ON A SANDWICH ARCHIVE.DOESNTEXIST.ORG

>> No.1618038

>>1618032
DON'T TELL THEM

>> No.1618143

>>1618032
Oh god that's fucking awesome, I'll have to show that to my friends on /b/ to see if they can make one for the other boards.

>> No.1618145

>>1618143

You miserable son of a whore.

>> No.1618149
File: 35 KB, 736x736, 1226821852082.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1618149

>>1618143

>> No.1618158

>>1618145
Jeez, no reason to hate. That's a really awesome site and everyone should have access to it.

>> No.1618164

>>1618158
Now I'm SURE you're a troll.

>> No.1618171

>>1617650
Has anything else happened since you blew your load in her hands?

>> No.1618187

>>1618171
Fucking hell why won't this thread die, I want to stop talking about my sexual encounters with my sister. Yes, "stuff" has happened, but it's not interesting. It's along the lines of her walking from the bathroom to her room in a towel, seeing me, and flashing me. Or just asking about random shit. Nothing interesting enough to post about.

>> No.1618201

>>1618187

And you saw her delicious flat chest and smooth vag? FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

>> No.1618207

>>1618201
Not like I haven't seen them before. Sure, I wasn't really interested then, but it's not like it's a new sight for me.

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